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Archives for 07/31/2005 - 08/06/2005

Saturday, August 6, 2005

Amy Jenniges Seeks Intern. PI Reporters Encouraged to Apply.

posted by on August 6 at 11:30 AM

It’s become a comedic ritual in the Stranger news room: After Amy J. files one of her neighborhood stories, we start counting down until it lands on the front-page of the PI’s local section. The PI just keeps mining Amy’s storieswhile failing to cite Amy’s work. Today’s PI story on Skateboard Mom Kate Martin is just the latest example. Here’s Amy’s version from two months ago.

I called the PI’s Metro Editor about the “Stealing Amy J.” phenomenon a few weeks ago after the PI had ripped off the latest Amy J. installment. He was nice about it, complimented Amy J., and said he’d be more respectful in the future in terms of citing Amy and the Stranger. Oh well, including today, it’s happened twice now since that conversation.

I’ve linked a couple other recent Amy J. stories along with the PI’s Xeroxed version. (And there’s plenty more.)

Amy’s
and The PI’s version.

Amy’s
and The PI’s version

Amy’s
and The PI’s version.

This last story doesn’t have Amy’s by-line. That’s because she threw the story to the intern.

GhostCycle Backlash

posted by on August 6 at 12:44 AM

From a reader in the forums:

I watched some stupid chick today place a new sign over the ghost cycle one in Fremont. It was white and red and said ” a careless cyclist was struck here”

What’s next lady? Are you going to start going to funerals for people who die of aids with a sign that proclaims “this careless gay guy got what he deserved”?

I heckled her while she carefully installed the new sign. The comment about her huge ass seemed to hit home. I bet a few miles on the bike would do you some good girl.

Did some mean biker do you wrong? Tired of having actually pay attention when driving around in your crappy light blue wagon?

Do everyone that rides a favor get out you head out of your ass!

Over in this Seattle journal, eagle-eyed Brenna Flood got a photo of the new signs.

antighostcycle.jpg



Friday, August 5, 2005

What’s the Wet Spot Really Like?

posted by on August 5 at 5:48 PM

Wendy over in the forums has a rather un-PC question that she needs answered. Anyone out there who can help?

has anyone actually been to the wet spot? i am curious about it, but being a hot 20-something capitol hillster, i don’t really want to go to waste my time going somewhere with a bunch of fat poly goths in vinyl (sorry, i’ll be nice to them in everyday life and all, but i don’t want to fuck them.or see them fucking.ew.). I can get free hot ass up here. I just want a dungeon. and, like, i know about being pro-sex and I am pretty open minded in my non-sex life, but i know what i want when it comes to pussy, and it is not akward smelly people with bad dyed black hair. can anyone tell me if this stereotype is un-applicable? ps i don’t fuck people with bad dyed black hair on the hill, either. anymore.

Outraged? Let Wendy know in the forums. Got an answer for her? Even bettershare it with Wendy in the Stranger Forums.

You can find Wendy’s question here.

You can find the rest of the forums here.

Re: Downtown Buskers

posted by on August 5 at 4:47 PM

Hooray for intrepid readers!

Amy -

Saw your entry on the Slog about the downtown “Scottish Hip-Hop” buskers. That’d be Don Scobie (bagpipes) and Jesse Bishop (drums), and they call themselves the Bag ‘n’ Pipe Hoppers. I’ve run into them a few times around town, have a few photos, and blogged about them myself recently, complete with a video I took of some b-boys breakdancing to the music.

Just filling in some of the blanks…

Michael Hanscom

In Slog-ready HTML, no less. Thanks Michael!

More Creators with Master Plans

posted by on August 5 at 2:24 PM

To all 37 of you who care, I wish to add S.E.V.A., whom I review in this week’s issue, to my previously posted list of high-minded hiphop artists. Roll over 50 Cent and tell Lil’ Jon the news…

No Endorsement for Nickels in North Seattle Pt. 2

posted by on August 5 at 1:55 PM

So, Nickels’s campaign manager called me back. His official line was as follows: “We had about half the room, but you need two thirds. It’s really not a big deal.”

Unofficially, I think the Nickels camp is super bummed, though. With the mayor’s Northgate deal framing the endorsement meeting last night, it’s clear that neighborhood resentment against Nickels is potent enough to stall any real mandate for Nickels in this year’s election. Nickels is obviously going to win in November, but his failure in the 46th District speaks volumes about the depth of his support (or lack thereof).


Rats.

posted by on August 5 at 1:05 PM

Amy Jenniges (12:56pm): I just saw your banner flying over the city

Amy Jenniges (12:57pm): thank you. it completely changed my mind.

AIM (1:02pm): showthetruthwa has logged off

Regardless, my contest still stands. The loonies will log back on eventually.

The Flying Fetusi Won’t Answer…

posted by on August 5 at 1:05 PM

(P.S. from Nick: “Since they have an AOL.com address, anyone can add the screen name to their buddy list and instant message them. They’re signed on right now!!!!”)

I tried IM’ing the pro-life pilotsto thank them for their banner, as it totally changed my mind about the right to choosebut they haven’t responded.

Wanna try them yourself? Send a message to showthetruthwa.

Email me if you get a response from them. The best one wins fried chicken from KFC.

Tonight. Fremont. You. God. Art.

posted by on August 5 at 12:40 PM

In Stranger Suggests this week, the Vital 5 event tonight at Priceless Works Gallery in Fremont is listed on the wrong night. It’s tonight. You should go. Here’s Nate Lippens’s description, as well as all the relevant info:

`God’s First Solo Exhibition’
(ART) Of course, God is an artist. All dictators are. But until now attempts to have His work shown have been thwarted by small-minded curators. That all changes at this one-night-only event of the Creator’s selected works (rumored to include nudity) presented by the always-adventurous Vital 5 Productions. It will also be the final show at Priceless Works as owner Ragan Peck is moving to New York City. (Priceless Works Gallery, 619 N 35th St, #100, 349-9943. 6—10 pm, $1.)

Finger Lickin’ Sicknin’

posted by on August 5 at 12:25 PM

A British-accented Peta volunteer is picketing the Pine Street KFC right now. I couldn’t help but take the glossy flyer she offered: It’s decorated with Pam Anderson, Al Sharpton, and a chicken corpse. Chickens in all forms (dead, alive, fried, whatever) are disgusting, but even worse is this hidden-camera footage of a KFC processing plant in West Virginia. It sounds like the sadistic bruisers are listening to Guns N’ Roses’ “Paradise City” as they smack the poor filthy birds around. As Sharpton says, “KFC, that’s foul!”

Ask & Ye Shall Receive: Flying Fetus Division

posted by on August 5 at 12:10 PM

Not ten minutes after slogging about the flying fetus bemusing north Seattle residentsin which I expressed hope that someone could provide the foetus-flyer’s whole phone numberI got an email from celebrity music intern Nick, who gave me the number (360-480-9329) and the lowdown.

(P.S. from Nick: “Since they have an AOL.com address, anyone can add the screen name to their buddy list and instant message them. They’re signed on right now!!!!”)

Screw the Blue Angels, Bring On the Flying Fetuses!

posted by on August 5 at 11:58 AM

I just got a phone call from a very nice man named Dave, who told me how his plans for a sunny day of lounging in his north Seattle yard were ruinedor at least seriously complicatedby the sight of a small plane pulling a banner reading, THE FACE OF PRO-CHOICE, illustrated with a photo of an aborted fetus.

Not only did Dave phone in the report, he took a photo: towed_ad-001.jpg
Thank you, Dave.

(Now if we can just get a photo that reveals the whole phone number…)

THE MOTHERFUCKIN STOOGES

posted by on August 5 at 11:41 AM

So Bumbershoot snagged The Stooges for their Monday night headlining slot. I think we can easily say that us music staffers here at the Stranger are unified in giddy schoolgirl excitement—even Dave Segal, who otherwise is quite masculine. I mean, the Stooges!!!

Creators with Master Plans

posted by on August 5 at 11:39 AM

For hiphop heads tired of hollow bling and rote misogyny, these three new-ish releases offer love vibes and spirituality galore, along with tranquilly psychedelic productions inspired by astral-jazz legends Pharoah Sanders, Don Cherry, and Alice Coltrane. Although these artists, as far as I know, haven’t been shot, you may like them anyway. In order of quality…

Ammon Contact’s New Birth (Ninja Tune)
Induce’s Cycle (Wonder Sound)
Dwight Trible & the Life Force Trio’s Love Is the Answer (Ninja Tune)

Funny Shit: Ironic Racism Division

posted by on August 5 at 11:39 AM

Here’s the kind of outsider art project I love: A small collection of movie reviews written by one Bob “Sir Bumpkin” Turko, posted on the Amazon website.

While We’re On the Subject…

posted by on August 5 at 11:36 AM

Dan,

I got this email this morning about Enumclaw’s famously deceased horse-fuckee (someone alert Nicole Brodeur!):

Someone I know works with the local courts (sorry, can’t be more specific, don’t want them to get in trouble)…anyhow, the cops who have seen the video of the horse fucking are saying that after the guy getting horse fucked got hurt and said something like, ouch, something broke, two other guys came in and finished off the horse orally. All on film. Nice.

OKay, I’m off to lunch. Anyone care to join me at, say, Ivar’s for some chowder?

Dog Days of August

posted by on August 5 at 11:25 AM

People are always asking me to see letters I get at Savage Love that don’t make it into the column. I’m not sure if this one will run or not, but I wanted to share it. Why should I suffer alone? (Please note: You might want to wait to read this until after lunch.)

You want a little personal responsibility, Dan? I couldn’t agree more, so let me lead the way: I fuck dogs. (Actually, I don’t own a dog at the moment, but if I did you can bet we’d be doing it like, well, animals) Since your advice to Help Me, the girl who supposedly awakened only to find her friend’s dog’s face buried in her crotch, wasn’t very thorough, here I am.

First of all, Help Me, I’ve never heard of any of the zoophiles I know getting an infection from having their pussy lapped at, and I know quite a few zoophiles. Still, a nice hot shower never hurt anyone. If you decide to include penetrative sex with your canine companion, both you and he might consider a bath beforehand as well as after.

The behavior you are engaging in is not inherently harmful to you or the dog, but I would think twice about playing with a dog that isn’t yours. It’s deceitful, and might confuse your oblivious friend when she gets home and the dog tries to get as friendly with her as he is with you. I agree with Dan insofar as taking responsibility for your actions goes, so I would say that if sex with canines is something that interests you now is the time to find out as much as you can about it. Explore your feelings without judging yourself, try to find others who live the lifestyle and can advise you. Then if you decide this is something you want to pursue, consider getting your own four footed companion. Be prepared to treat any animal you bring into your home with respect and care. Don’t get a dog if the only time you intend on giving it attention is when you are fucking.

As for your third question, you aren’t sick just because you get off on doggy cunnilingus. Granted, like any group, we zoos have our embarrassing, abusive, sick representatives, but the majority of us live content, functioning lives, enriched and enlivened by our animal companions. (It’s not just dogs either. Some of us enjoy horses, goats, sheep, dolphins, and others.) Zoophilia is only a problem if it becomes a fetish or a compulsion. Otherwise, it is only people’s irrational fear and disgust that keeps us in the barn, so to speak.

Good luck.

A Seattle Dog Lover

Orrapin

posted by on August 5 at 11:12 AM

Anyone ever been to Orrapin on Queen Anne Ave. N. (really, has anyone ever been to Queen Anne?)? Bre Loughlin, Kuma frontwoman, is playing a lo-fi solo show there tonight at 8 pm. It sounds like a jewel of a placeloungey but non-smoking, with cocktails and Thai snacksfrom the smidge of info I dredged up online.

Curses!

posted by on August 5 at 11:03 AM

To hell with decorum and netiquette: Go to this site and stock up on ingenious insults for your next internet discussion-board debate or barroom argument.

Frothy Coincidence? Lube-Smeared Mix-Up?

posted by on August 5 at 10:50 AM

Nichole, an alert Savage Love reader in U.S. Senator Rick Santorum’s home state (Pennsylvania), spotted a pair of interesting headlines on a single page of last Sunday’s Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. “Santorum’s Everywhereā€¯ began a headline on the upper right hand corner of the page; “Frothy Disputeā€¯ read the headline on the lower left. (Thanks for sending it in, Nichole!)

newspaper.jpg

Since launching my wildly successful campaign to redefine Santoruminspired by a Savage Love reader, new definition created by a Savage Love reader, voted on by a Savage Love readersmainstream papers have shied away from covering this political and linguistic triumph. But headline writers seem to delight in working in references to the new definition of Santorum, “that frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.ā€¯

While there hasn’t been a lot of coverage of lower-case “sā€¯ santorum in the MSMeven after it was declared one of the “words of the year” by the American Dialect SocietyI’ve lost count of the number of times phrases like “Santorum Smears…ā€¯ or “Santorum Spreads…ā€¯ have been used in headlines. Whether this is one of those instances or a simple coincidence is an open question. “Whoever the editor down at the PPG is either totally hip to your column or completely oblivious,ā€¯ wrote Nichole. Regardless, Santorum’s name can no longer appear anywhere near the words “frothyā€¯ or “mixā€¯ - or “smear,” as it did when Santorum blamed Boston’s liberalism for inspiring all those Catholic priests to rape kids - without making people go “hmmm…ā€¯

And anyone who doubts that lower-case “sā€¯ santorum isn’t a worldwide movement, here’s the santorum entry from the German version of Wikipedia.

And then there are subtle nods to Santorum’s new meaning, like this pic in the Washington Post of the Senator playing baseball…

Santorum At the Bat.jpg


Mayor Nickels Doesn’t Get Endorsement

posted by on August 5 at 10:45 AM

The 46th District Democrats (North Seattle) handed out their municipal election endorsements last night, and they refused to give the nod to Nickels. They issued no endorsement in the mayor’s race which features Nickels and slew of minor challengers. It’s pretty embarrassing for Nickels, I think.
I’ve got a call into Nickels’s campaign manager. I’m curious to hear their spin on this one.

Roberts’ Pro-Bono Work on Landmark Gay Rights Case

posted by on August 5 at 10:32 AM

I can’t believe I missed this yesterday, but the big news from the LA Times on Thursday (there’s a West Coast paper for ya, Savage) is that while Supreme Court nominee John Roberts was in private practice at Hogan & Hogan in D.C., he advised lawyers to the plaintiffs in the landmark gay rights case Romer v. Evans. Does this mean he’s more gay-friendly than we’ve been led to believe, or was he simply pro-kissing up to his bosses at his more moderate place of employ?

Today comes reams of analysis. The New York Times article is thoroughly reported, with descriptions of the actual advice he gave to the group. (He helped the pro-gay lawyers anticipate and develop rebuttals to objections from conservative Justices Scalia and Rehnquist.)

More follow-ups available at the LA Times (w/ a neutral, social libertarian quote from Grover Norquist), and at the Washington Post (a more cautious analysis, which seems inclined toward the opinion that none of this means anything about Roberts’ judicial philosophy).

Just Right

posted by on August 5 at 10:24 AM

Sometimes even I don’t want a full night’s worth of live music. Some nights you want to hang out with your friends and maybe see one band. For those nights I highly recommend Thursdays at the War Room. They book one to two bands, usually a mix of cool local up and comers and random international acts (like last week’s Mu show). Cover is cheap, the bands are great, and you can still spend a lot of the night catching up with friends without having to yell over a band.

Sigh.

posted by on August 5 at 9:47 AM

I have a long, interesting post I want to get upwell, interesting to me and at least one reader out therebut we’re having email problems and so, for the moment, I can’t get my SLOG post up.

Downtown Buskers

posted by on August 5 at 9:09 AM

Last night, at the corner of 5th and Pine in front of Nordstrom, there was a great busker duo. Ordinarily, I’m either annoyed or simply unimpressed with buskers, but these two younger guys drew quite a crowdand with an unusual combo of instruments. One played a full drum set, and the other backed him up on…bagpipes. I’m ill equipped to describe the music they were making, but it was a great beat for two random guys to spontaneously rap along. The entire thing became it’s own genre: alternative Scottish hip-hop.


Thursday, August 4, 2005

Novak Calls Bullshit

posted by on August 4 at 5:23 PM

And then storms off the set of “Inside Politics.” Video of his public meltdown is here.

Re: Fucking Horses

posted by on August 4 at 4:44 PM

The horse in Enumclaw did the fucking, not the other way around. Geez, Amy, don’t you read the papers? Nicole Brodeur in the Seattle Times ALONE wrote not one but two columns about it - that’s one more than I wrote about it!

Hey, Nicole! Horse-fuckees are MY beat!

Re: Blue Angels

posted by on August 4 at 2:54 PM

It might scare the horses.

Fuck the horses.


Oh, wait. People already have.

Re: Blue Angels

posted by on August 4 at 2:45 PM

The Blue Angels can’t practice or perform in Enumclaw. It might scare the horses.

Pass the Earplugs

posted by on August 4 at 1:54 PM

Was that a goddamn frickin Blue Angel that just shrieked over our office?

This is the worst week of the year. Can’t they practice (and hold the entire air show) in Enumclaw or something? Ugh.

Isamu Iloveu

posted by on August 4 at 1:09 PM

I visited the Isamu Noguchi exhibit at Seattle Art Museum yesterday. Noguchi had a gift for creating simple beauty and organic design. I’ve never seen the downtown space laid out like this before. To see the exhibit you travel through four galleries, each its own distinct environment showcasing Noguchi’s work. It is wonderful and well worth a visit before it leaves next month.

Of course you can check out Noguchi’s Black Sun in Volunteer Park anytime you like.

Hmmm…

posted by on August 4 at 11:47 AM

Dan, I hear what you’re saying about the 25-foot provision in the smoking ban. I agree, that was D-U-M-B to have that in there. They are alienating lots of people who would otherwise support the initiative. That said, when I worked at Megacorp there was a smoking ban around all the doorways and it was fabulous. When you went outside you weren’t instantly engulfed in a cloud of cigarette smoke. Ah, fresh air…

As to the selective enforcement of the 25-foot provision, I can’t predict. I hope it wouldn’t happen, but I know that Seattle Police don’t have the best record for even enforcement. However if people really want to stick it to the Man, they can STOP SMOKING. Nothing is more anti-radical than smoking. You give your time, money, energy, and health to the giant corporations that are supporting the current conservative, anti-gay, anti-environment, anti-choice, anti-civil-rights administration. And that’s what is really D-U-M-B.

Not so fast, Gillian…

posted by on August 4 at 11:09 AM

No one despises cigarette smoke more than I do - ask anyone who stands outside our office and smokes. “Smoking is bad for you” is, for some Stranger staffers, the only words they’ve ever heard come out of my mouth. I’m a nag, I admit. I hate smoke - and I love going to California or New York and having a drink or running around all night in clubs and not stinking of other people’s smoke.

But I can’t support 1-901 and personally plan to vote against it. The Stranger’s edit board hasn’t met with backers of the initiative yet, so the paper doesn’t have a position yet, but our endorsement seems unlikely. As Eli Sanders detailed in this story, the smoking ban includes a provision that isn’t a part of any smoking ban in any other city or state: It not only bans smoking inside bars and restaurants but outside too. It would be illegal to smoke within “within 25 feet of any door, window, or air vent that leads into a protected public space, such as a bar, club, restaurant, office building, or vehicle used by the general public.”

Hey, I hate smoke. Sometimes I hate smokers - they can be rude and inconsiderate and many of them think it’s cute when their smoke bothers others. But I don’t hate smoke or smokers - or bar and club owners - so much that I want to ban smoking on the sidewalk in front of the club, or on the open-air decks that club owners in cities and states with smoking bans have built to accommodate their smoking patrons. But what I really want to avoid is giving the police an excuse to selectively harass clubs. I-901 includes fines of up to $100 for folks smoking within 25 feet of a door to club. I doubt that old farts and frat boys smoking in front of, say, Fox Sports Bar will be fined. But the smoking patrons of gay watering holes, music and hip-hop clubs, and noisy bars would be fined and harassed.

Seattle’s police department has an awful record when it comes to fucking with and fucking over bars and clubs. If 901 passes, the SPD will target the smoking patrons of bars and clubs that the department doesn’t like. I can’t vote for 901 because I don’t want to hand the police another stick they can use to beat bars, bar owners, drinkers, and music fans.

The authors and backers of I-901 really fucked up. If an anti-smoking Nazi like me won’t vote for it, they’ve got a problem.

Must-See TV

posted by on August 4 at 10:57 AM

To all those citizens blessed enough to have digital cablespecifically Comcast digital cable with HBOthere’s a documentary available “On Demand” that I’m totally obsessed with and can’t recommend highly enough, especially to those who love deep, dark humor-slash-terror: Living Dolls: The Making of a Child Beauty Queen.

Given the sordidness of the subject, Living Dolls features plenty of footage to which the only response is to gape in horrorthings like adults applying mascara to infants, and little, little girls ripping open their cowboy tops to expose their bustiers while making faces like this.

But director Shari Cookson hones her film into something far greater than a salacious indignation parade, focusing her documentary on the pageant journey of one little girl with an exceedingly dramatic backstory, which turns Living Dolls into a Hoop Dreams for the Jon-Benet set, and perhaps the most disturbing G-rated film you’ll ever see.

Catch it while you can, as it’ll be taken off the HBO On Demand menu on Monday, Aug 8.

(Thanks to Jake Nelson for his lovely photo of TV.)

Smoking Ban on Ballot

posted by on August 4 at 10:44 AM

Initiative 901, an initiative that would ban indoor smoking in public places, has secured its spot on the November 8 ballot. Yeah! No more stinky smoky grody horrible smelly airless eye-watering ashy dirty clubs!

Barney Frank

posted by on August 4 at 8:17 AM

I saw Barney Frank speak at Benaroya last night, and was quite impressed by the homo House member from Massachusetts. Two things of note:

1) Frank endorsed outing closeted Republicans who vote against gay rights, which a certain someone may be interested to know. And the Congressman cited none other than John Locke as the intellectual underpinning for this stance. If I can dig up the actual Locke quote he cited, I’ll post it later today.

2) Frank is very funny. His best line described the overdone horror that right-wingers expressed when it turned out America really liked Clinton, in all his philandering, homo-tolerating glory. The right-wingers acted, Frank said, as if they’d gone to bed in a Norman Rockwell painting and then woken up in a Hieronymus Bosch.

Some Intelligence on “Intelligent Design”

posted by on August 4 at 5:00 AM

Time magazine’s conservative columnist, Charles Krauthammer of all people, trashes the notion that teaching “Intelligent Design” in public school science classes is even close to an OK idea. Here’s a choice excerpt from his essay this week:

What we are witnessing now is a frontier violation by the forces of religion. This new attack claims that because there are gaps in evolution, they therefore must be filled by a divine intelligent designer. How many times do we have to rerun the Scopes “monkey trial”? There are gaps in science everywhere. Are we to fill them all with divinity? There were gaps in Newton’s universe. They were ultimately filled by Einstein’s revisions. There are gaps in Einstein’s universe, great chasms between it and quantum theory. Perhaps they are filled by God. Perhaps not. But it is certainly not science to merely declare it so.

Meanwhile, a post over at Aravosis’s Americablog makes the point that I was trying to make yesterday (about Bush’s unwitting endorsement of cultural relativism) much better than I did:

Does the President believe students should be taught about astrology? Does the President believe students should be taught about crystals/New Age therapy? Does the President believe students should be taught both sides of the debate as to whether the Holocaust really happened? Does the President believe students should be taught the idea that the US landing on the moon was faked? Why not? There are dozens if not hundreds of books pushing this theory. A certain percentage of the population believes it and it was even the subject of a primetime documentary on Fox? What possible justification could the President offer for keeping this “debate” from students? And why doesn’t that justification apply to creationism as well?


Wednesday, August 3, 2005

I’m sitting on the back stairs in my apartment building

posted by on August 3 at 7:21 PM

…which is the coldest place in my building. Why is it so fucking sunny? Why does everyone pretend this is “great” weather?

Fox Education

posted by on August 3 at 6:30 PM

Fox Cable News did, in fact, descend on the Stranger’s offices today and interview me about NARAL and the Screw Abstinence thing. And while I did ding NARAL, I also punctuated every speaking point with the following line: It’s the Republicans’ fault that comprehensive, factually and medically accurate sex education is not taught in our public schools.

When the interview was over (it went for about 45 minutes), I said to the producer, “I saw your face light up when I said that thing about ‘sex party politics,’ so I know that’s the sound bite you’re going with. But really, I want to emphasize…” And then he cut me off, and he said, “It’s the Republicans’ fault that comprehensive, factually and medically accurate sex education is not taught in the public schools.” We’ll see what he does. The piece is supposedly airing sometime tomorrow. (I don’t have cable, so I’ll have to rely on someone else’s account of this impending fiasco.)

Wow

posted by on August 3 at 5:43 PM

There’s an ad for a very unique service in this week’s paper. (Perhaps the ad is always thereI just noticed it today.)

In the crafts section, a person offers his talent for “Human ash sculpture.”

My question: Does he turn grandpa’s ashes into a bust of grandpa? Or does he sculpt something symbolic of the departed? (In my grandpa’s case, that’d be a remote control.) I suppose he could do either, but which would you rather have displayed on the mantel?

I demand that this artist send us photos of his work.

Josh’s Cloning T-Shirt

posted by on August 3 at 4:10 PM

As promised.

Image(124).jpg

Apologies for the bad lighting.

Re: Hackett

posted by on August 3 at 3:23 PM

Indeed, Bush got 64% in that district in 2004. So, clearly it’s a good sign that Hackett came so close. But don’t oversell the phenomenon, Eli. Replicating Hackett’s campaign will be difficult unless, well, Hackett is actually the one running. Key factor: Hackett was an Iraqi vet. This gave him star-power, credibility, and traction in Red turf and made his rap on the war credible and exciting. I doubt the Dems are putting up many more like him in 2006. Parroting Hackett’s “chickenhawk” rap probably wont play well from non-vets in Red districts.

Hackett

posted by on August 3 at 2:35 PM

If you’ve been ignoring all the buzz about Iraq war veteran Paul Hackett’s run for Congress, now might be the time to at least commit his name to memory. Hackett, a Democrat, just barely lost yesterday in his closely-watched attempt to win in a deep red district of Ohio by running as a critic of Bush’s war. The fact that Hackett came within a few points of winning (after calling Bush a “chicken hawk” and “a cheerleader for the enemy”) is strong evidence that Republicans may be very vulnerable on Iraq in 2006. And Hackett will now be shorthand for that promising vulnerability.

Re: Zapped Scouts

posted by on August 3 at 12:55 PM

I feel awful for the dead Scouts and, of course, for their parents. How horrible.

But I can’t help but wonder…

If lightning were striking and killing, say, marchers in gay pride parades or hetero porn stars or abortion docs, Pat “Batshitcrazy” Robertson et al. would be running around insisting that this was God’s righteous judgment/death penalty.

But dead Scouts? What could God be telling us? Nothing, of course. When natural disasters, small or large scale, happen to people the American Taliban hates, it’s God sending a message. When natural disasters happen to people they like — to people everyone likes — it’s usually chalked up to “God moves in mysterious ways.”

My Favorite P-I Sub-Headline

posted by on August 3 at 12:46 PM

in recent memory, from today:

GAS PRICES HIT RECORD
Some consumers forced to alter habits

the very idea!

Lightning Claims Another Scout

posted by on August 3 at 11:40 AM

I no longer have any wisecracks to make about the ongoing Scoutocaust.

After last week’s horrorsthe four Scout leaders fatally electrocuted at the annual Jamboree in Virginia, the two scouts fatally struck by lightning in California, today’s deadly zap in Utahit’s clear that electricity has declared Jihad on the Boy Scouts.

But why? Can the Scouts’ woodsy survivalist leanings really be such an affront to the gods of electricity?

Or is this one of those media trends, where one grisly Scout electrocution results in the reporting of all other Scout electrocutions, making it seem like a horrifying new trend when really, Scouts and their leaders are fatally electrocuted all the time?

Either way, eep.

The latest from camp Bumbershoot

posted by on August 3 at 11:21 AM

Elvis Costello is now one of the headlining acts.

Bush’s Cultural Relativism Continued

posted by on August 3 at 10:05 AM

I mean, if Bush really believes that every POV should be addressed in the class room…why is he dumping $273 million into abstinence only education?

Bush Endorses Cultural Relativism

posted by on August 3 at 8:35 AM

Liberals are upset by Bush’s recent comments about “intelligent design.” But they should be hailing his new standing as a poltically correct cultural relativist. Let’s get Buddhist reincarnation theory in there too, Mr. President.

“In an interview at the White House on Monday with a group of Texas newspaper reporters, Mr. Bush appeared to endorse the push by many of his conservative Christian supporters to give intelligent design equal treatment with the theory of evolution.

Recalling his days as Texas governor, Mr. Bush said in the interview, according to a transcript, “I felt like both sides ought to be properly taught.” Asked again by a reporter whether he believed that both sides in the debate between evolution and intelligent design should be taught in the schools, Mr. Bush replied that he did, “so people can understand what the debate is about.”

Mr. Bush was pressed as to whether he accepted the view that intelligent design was an alternative to evolution, but he did not directly answer. “I think that part of education is to expose people to different schools of thought,” he said, adding that “you’re asking me whether or not people ought to be exposed to different ideas, and the answer is yes.”

Pride Explodes!

posted by on August 3 at 8:20 AM

I’m a little behind the “what’s wrong with Seattle’s pride parade” curve, but I was away and, er, for other reasons - repressed memories, mostly - I couldn’t bring myself to address the pride parade issue. But there is one thing I wanted to get on the record:

Anyone looking for evidence of just how obtuse, clueless and out of touch with the zeitgiest (sp?) the folks who run Seattle’s pride events are needn’t look any further than the theme and logo for last month’s pride parade.

pride_corner.jpg

Pride explosion? Diversity is a blast?

Even before the London tube bombings - and, yes, this occurred to me before the London bombings, even though I’m only now getting around to saying something about it - choosing “explosion” as a theme for any event is just… wrong. New York, Bali, Madrid, Tel Aviv, car bombs, IEDs, bombings in Saudi Arabia (why can’t they get one into the tent with their despicable royal family?), the deaths of 14 Marines today in Iraq…

Explosions and blasts these days don’t call pleasant, celebratory images to mind, just images of death and destruction and quagmires. One can only wonder what will the theme be for next year’s pride parade will be. If that killer bird flu sweeps the world it’ll probably be something like, “Pride Influenza! Catch It!”



Tuesday, August 2, 2005

Seattle’s Gonna Have Some Sad, Sad Junkies

posted by on August 2 at 4:13 PM

As I just learned from this KIRO news report, yesterday Seattle police executed a bust at an apartment on Lake City Way, where they reportedly recovered over 1,000 grams of heroin, arresting two men for investigation of possession of drugs with intent to sell.

Look for the Night of the Cold-Horse Junkies to begin momentarily…

Shawnna Hughes Update

posted by on August 2 at 2:36 PM

Last December, we broke a story about a Spokane woman who couldn’t get a divorce because she was pregnant. Her name was Shawnna Hughes, and her story wound up on Good Morning America. Our story also sparked legislative reform in Olympia.

A.J. Glusman, the reporterand law studentwho broke the story for us, just sent me an update (see below). Looks like the law is adamant about being sexist in this case.


Continue reading "Shawnna Hughes Update" »

The Predictions Of Chantelle

posted by on August 2 at 2:26 PM

Perhaps you’re already aware of the Seattle Museum of the Mysteries, “Washington State’s Only Paranormal Science Museum UFO History, Bigfoot, and Ghost Museum,” located at the north end of Broadway.

But did you know they have a resident clairsentient? It’s true: Her name’s Chantelle, and she “facilitates Communicating with The Dead and Mysteries of Tarot on the 2nd, third, and fourth Fridays of the Month from 7-10 PM.”

Even better, she offers predictions on a month-by-month basis. Here are Chantelle’s predictions for August 2005 (courtesy of a Museum of the Mysteries press release):

Shuttle will lose more pieces and a crew member ā€¢ Next wave of terrorist attacks in Britain will be involving Muslim women. ā€¢ There will be an intensity in mortal combat, technical glitches and issues with the power grids. ā€¢ Health problems will be brought on due to overstressing the joints and bones. i.e more multiple car wrecks than seen in a long time. In clear weather. ā€¢ More UFO siteings will occur in the southern hemisphere mostly due to hurricanes, but will be unexplained.

Check back in September, when I’ll figure out Chantelle’s clairsentient batting average…

Josh’s Shirt

posted by on August 2 at 2:11 PM

this time, I’m going to wear my homemade pro-cloning t-shirt.

Dear readers, I promise to take a picture of Josh’s t-shirt tomorrow, and post it here. It’s a great shirt.

From the Forums

posted by on August 2 at 2:05 PM

A “reason for editing” entry of the day

“i have no idea what that means. nuns are hot, though, in a way. a non-fat-poly-goth way.”

Last edited by wendy : Today at 01:40 AM. Reason: hyphens

way to go, wendy.

Norquist

posted by on August 2 at 1:38 PM

It’s not often that I’m on exactly the same page as Josh, but last night, apparently, I was right there with him, reading The New Yorker’s Norquist profile (although several blocks away in my own apartment). At the risk of validating Dan’s theory that the slog is becoming a NYT/NYer discussion group…

I disagree with Josh when he says that Norquist’s description of the religious right as a “parents-rights” movement is “brilliance.” This description smacks of bone-headedness, not brilliance, as the author of the NYer piece, John Cassidy, points out, right after Norquist’s “parents-rights” quote:

This analysis would be more convincing if conservative evangelicals couched their case in libertarian terms, but they don’t. Instead, they call for the whole United States to return to its pious Christian roots…

Not exactly the hallmark of a “parents-rights” movement. And as for why this piece is a must-read, it’s not because Norquist is more “sassy” and “cosmopolitan” than many of the Republican faithful, especially those in the religious right. This contradiction between the Republican leadership and those they lead is old news. What’s big news is that Norquist, a top Republican, seems embarrassed for how Republicans crassly exploited homophobia during the last election in order to get out the religious/bigot vote.

A woman named Laura Sennett, who described herself as a housewife, confronted [Norquist] about last year’s election, when the Republican Party exploited gay marriage as a wedge issue. “It reminded me of Nazi Germany,” Sennett, who has a gay family member, said. “What was your reaction?” Norquist looked uncomfortable. Instead of answering directly, he predicted that twenty-three states would pass a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, after which the issue would disappear. Sennett wasn’t satisfied. She pressed Norquist again on what he thought of targeting gays, adding, “It’s bad, right?” At last, he answered her. “Yes, it’s bad,” he said.

This is the part of the article that Democrats should clip-and-save. It will probably come in handy in 2006.

Speaking of National News

posted by on August 2 at 12:12 PM

Once again, Fox Cable News Network says they’re coming to the Stranger’s offices to interview me about NARAL. Rather than wearing a tie and using hair goopas I did last time when they never showed upthis time, I’m going to wear my homemade pro-cloning t-shirt. Interview is slated for 10am tomorrow.

New York, New York

posted by on August 2 at 12:09 PM

The New Yorker, The New York Times, The New Yorker, The New York Times…

Does anyone around here ever read anything that doesn’t have “New York” in its title?

Our daily papers suck, admittedly, and there really isn’t a good magazine published west of the Mississippi, but what about, say, the LA Times?

Republican Mastermind

posted by on August 2 at 11:55 AM

Stayed up late last night reading the Aug. 1 New Yorker profile on Republican mastermind Grover Norquist. (Norquist’s no-new-taxes pledge was the precursor to 1994’s Contract w/ America, and Norquist, who runs an influential weekly Wednesday morning meeting for conservative activists, has been shaping the Republican agenda as director of Americans for Tax Reform ever since.) All Democrats must read this piece. It’s a scary story because it shows that a sassy, cosmopolitan, smart-ass (and not a Red-State Mullah nor a Texas operative) is truly running the show for the Rs. The article also highlights why Democrats who think the Republican coalition will unravel because of its internal contradictions (Christian Conservatives who want the government to regulate social mores vs. anti-tax conservatives who want smaller government) don’t get it. Norquist, whose brilliance has always been tying disparate agendas together under one compelling message, explained the Evangelical movement (which he personally seems to disdain) as a perfect fit: “The religious right is a parents-rights movement. They want the right to raise their kids in their own way.”
The one glimmer of hope is this: McCain and Norquist are bitter enemies. McCain’s chief of staff told the New Yorker, “I doubt the Senator is much troubled by Mr. Norquist’s opinion of him. On the contrary, he is pleased that he has never had an association with Mr. Norquist and prefers that it stays that way.” McCain seems to be the one wild card that Norquist can’t control. A McCain bid in 2008 may actually shatter the party if Norquist has anything to say about it. Which he will.

Speaking of Conceptual Pranks…

posted by on August 2 at 11:54 AM

I spent pre-dawn Monday morning riding shotgun with the guys and gals behind GhostCycle, as they littered the city with their white-painted bike sculptures (each represents a bike accident, and are meant to make auto drivers more aware of their two-wheeled neighbors).

You can read all about it when the paper’s out.

What I’ll tell you now: My favorite ghostcycle is #23the kink those GhostCyclers put in the bike’s frame is quite impressive.

In Defense of Conceptual Pranks

posted by on August 2 at 11:39 AM

Nate doesn’t seem too fond of Vital 5’s conceptual pranks. For the record: Vital 5’s conceptual pranks won ‘em a genius award three years ago. I think Lundgren/Vital 5’s stuff is engaging, aggressive, and hostile - but maybe I prefer art that charges at the viewer rather than art that sits back and expects the viewer to stand there silently, stroking his chin, attempting to divine the artist’s meaning, intent, various addictions, bipolar disorder, HIV status, etc.

Tako Gone Wild

posted by on August 2 at 11:33 AM

Listen, I’m no food critic, but I’ve always been a fan of eating octopus. Until I read this, anyway…

Make sure you watch the video.

Hot August Nights

posted by on August 2 at 10:52 AM

This month is full of Stranger arranged and supported oddball events—especially towards the end of the month, so mark these dates down now… Starting with Sat Aug 20, the night of our Hump! Amateur Porn Awards ceremony at Chop Suey.

Three days later, on Aug 23, we’re hosting our second live band laser light show at the Seattle Laser Theater. Last time we packed the house for Italian psych rockers Jennifer Gentle. This time we’re working with Brooklyn’s psychedelic pop act Grizzly Bear and you can listen to tracks from them here (including a Yes cover.) Buy tickets early here for only $8.

And finally, Sat, Aug 27, we’re sponsoring the annual I Sunk Your Battleship cruise with the Saturday Knights, Stabmaster Arson, the Cool Dragons, DJ FITS, DJ Curtis, a fashion show, and more. Tickets for that carnival booze cruise are here for $16.30. Get ‘em early too, cause this thing sells out every year.

Black Eyed

posted by on August 2 at 10:38 AM

words seem so paltry when confronted by something like this: fergie-wetspot.jpg

(Stolen photo re-stolen from gawker.com)

Danes & Dictators

posted by on August 2 at 10:13 AM

So, the boyfriend and I spent ten days in Europe. The kid was with grandma, God bless her, so we got to do things most parents don’t get to do: Drink, stay out all night, rinse, repeat.

Three quick things …

First, after George Bush stole the 2000 election we went to Scotland to see friends. They didn’t hold Bush against us then; they knew Bush stole the election and they held us blameless. That was then. Now that Bush actually won an electionunless he stole Ohio, which seems possible (see this month’s Harper’s)but even if he did steal Ohio, he somehow managed to win the popular vote, which he failed to do in 2000 (Gore beat Bush by 500,000 votes). The result? Europeans aren’t so forgiving these days. The headline on the cover of a British tabloid”How could 59,000,000 Americans be So Stupid?ā€¯captured the mood in Old Europe the day after the election and it’s still operative.

While no one held us personally responsible for Bush’s victoryno one over there thinks an American homo would be so stupid as to vote for George W. Bush (most folks over there haven’t heard of the Log Cabin Kids or Mary Cheney)many folks wanted to know/demanded to know how we could stand living among the stupid millions who voted for Bush. I explained that, as an urban person, I rarely encounter Bush voters. Bush voters can be found in rapidly depopulating rural areas, megachurches, soulless exurbs, Iraq, and body bags. Avoid those places, we told `em, and you can go all day without dealing with a Bush supporter.

Second, people in Denmark, one of three countries we visited, are tall, blond, good-looking, neat, clean, and health-conscious. But the average Dane smokes like burning piles of tires. It was very unpleasant.

Third, the gay bars in Copenhagen were a lot like the gay bars at homethey’re a lot like the gay bars everywhere. We drank in one called “Jail,ā€¯ that reminded us of the Eagle, another one that reminded us of Manray, and one that was indistinguishable from Re-bar. But we never visited a gay bar called “Men’s Bar.ā€¯ It was right around the corner from our hotel (which was right across the street from Copenhagen’s cruisy park), but this ad in the gay rag scared us away:

unknown 3.jpg

Who knew that fags in Denmark fetishized Latin American Dictators? I mean, they mustwhy else would a gay bar put a photo of Augusto Pinochet in its ad? Creepy.

bread buyers beware

posted by on August 2 at 10:12 AM

I agree that her wonderful, dense bread is worth the crazed spiel that comes with it. But make sure you remove the loaf from its paper bag and inspect it before you buy; last time she sold me a $9 loaf that turned out to be totally burnt and inedible.

Wheat: It’s like taking a colon-cancer pill.

posted by on August 2 at 10:06 AM

Re: At the Broadway farmer’s market on Sunday…

I bought a loaf of cranberry hazelnut bread from this woman who said the bread was made from the second oldest grain in the world, is a pound-and-a-half round (like loaves made thousands of years ago), is wheat free, does not mold, contains no refined sugars, cures cancer, could broker a Middle East peace deal, etc.

I love that woman! It’s amazingly easy to get her to pontificate about the evils of gluten and the magic of her emmer grain. Everything else is pure toxins, you know. Her speeches alone are worth her steep bread-and-pastry prices.

Jim Jarmusch Talks Movies

posted by on August 2 at 9:52 AM

Last Sunday the New York Times Magazine ran a wonderful profile of my favorite movie director, Jim Jarmusch. He charmingly talks about his preference to be “subcultural rather than mass-cultural” and how he still gets advice from the late great Joe Strummer.

read it here

At the Broadway farmer’s market on Sunday…

posted by on August 2 at 8:50 AM

I bought a loaf of cranberry hazelnut bread from this woman who said the bread was made from the second oldest grain in the world, is a pound-and-a-half round (like loaves made thousands of years ago), is wheat free, does not mold, contains no refined sugars, cures cancer, could broker a Middle East peace deal, etc. The bread is awesome if you like dark, incredibly dense bread.

The farmer’s market happens every Sunday in the parking lot behind Bank of America. I also bought some local sheep’s cheese and a red raspberry spread. There are samples everywhere and the farm boys are sexy.


Monday, August 1, 2005

Another Six-Way Fan

posted by on August 1 at 6:16 PM

On the east coast, my friend Ari Melber apparently noticed the same six-books-at-once review that I slogged about this morning. His thoughts are here, at HuffingtonPost.com, where he defends parasitic bloggers and takes on the logic used by the federal appeals court judge who wrote the review for The New York Times.

Got an Opinion About KEXP?

posted by on August 1 at 4:05 PM

Air your views about Seattle radio station KEXP in this survey. It’ll take about 10 minutesand it’s therapeutic, too. (Thanks to Stranger columnist Bethany Jean Clement for the tip.)

Enter The Grouch

posted by on August 1 at 1:54 PM

Upset by all the bad press he’s been getting, Robert Novak makes a rare comment on the CIA leak case. And boy is it grumpy.

re: Block Party or Rock Party?

posted by on August 1 at 12:56 PM

Though the delectable beats kept drawing me near, it was a mix of the blazing heat, lack of refreshments, and the icky atmosphere that wouldn’t let me linger at the Decibel “Stage” (more like a chain-link dog run).

“Unconscionable!!”

posted by on August 1 at 12:50 PM

Well, now it’s official. Our dearest departed Sandeep Kaushik is a member of the establishment spin machine. Kaushik, identified as a “Sims spokesman,” was quoted in Nicole Brodeur’s column last week. I know the straight world was always sweet on Kaushik everyone from Seattle Times lead political reporter David Postman to Washington News Council president Jon Hamer to Town Hall guy David Brewster to the Seattle Weekly (they tried to hire Kaushik away from us in 2002)was a serious Kaushik fan. But damn, landing in Brodeur’s milquetoast column really confirms the sad news.

I also detected Sandeep’s hand in Sims’s widely-distributed sound bite about the Port’s anti-light rail threat. “Unconscionable,” Sims said. “Unconscionable?” Pure Kaushik. But Sandeep as Sims’s spokesman? “Unconscionable,” I say.

Block Party or Rock Party?

posted by on August 1 at 11:58 AM

This year marked the first time the Block Party devoted a stage to electronic music, allowing the Decibel organization to book a strong lineup of local DJs and producers. I’m sad to report that attendance for most of the performances was sparse, despite the consistently excellent musical output emanating from Decibel’s confines. Highlights include Lusine’s live set (which actually had a fairly large crowd dancing), and DJ exploits from Jerry Abstract, Caro, Kris Moon, and DJ Eddie.

Why did people stay away in droves? Maybe Seattle’s more of a rock-centric town than I’m willing to admit. Or maybe electronic-music fans just don’t like the sun and the smell of the nearby KFC.

Juice

posted by on August 1 at 10:48 AM

Rafael Palmeiro of the Baltimore Orioles, recently a member of the elite 3,000 hit club (a milestone he reached against our very own Seattle Marinersbut then, who can’t hit against our boys?), has been suspended for steroid violations. He’s the first big name to be suspended under Major League Baseball’s new anti-steroid policy.

Palmeiro no doubt regrets his testimony in March before Congress, when he stated, rather forcefully, “I have never used steroids. Period. I do not know how to say it any more clearly than that.”

Maybe it’s just because I love the Netherlands…

posted by on August 1 at 10:34 AM

…but I think this trend in dance clubs sounds great.


Splendid time guaranteed for all

posted by on August 1 at 8:57 AM

I don’t know if it’s just because I’ve had my head in a book or something, but 15th Ave hasn’t seemed super neighborhoody this summer, at least not until last evening, when I was walking from restaurant to grocery store to video store, accompanied by the sound of an 8-piece brass band playing at muted-but-healthy volume outside the Victrola. It seems like such a small thing, but it magnetized the sidewalk foot traffic and made everyone stop and watch and listen together in this very Sgt. Pepper in Seattle way.

A Six-Way, and it Was Great

posted by on August 1 at 8:17 AM

I loved many things about this review of six books at once, which was really more of a discussion of six books at once, and appeared in Sunday’s New York Times Book Review.

I loved that it is about media economics and was written by a federal appeals court judge who is also a blogger. I mean, how deliciously nerdy. I love that the judge, Richard Posner, writes as if he’s delivering a decision on a complicated case, taking time to first dispense with sideshow matters that tend to get the most attention and then narrowing in on what are actually “the interesting questions.” Finally, I love that he just will not allow journalism to be seen as anything other than a product, primarily, of economic forces. Those who write for a living, and those who criticize those who write for a living that should cover just about everyone in America should print this long piece out and enjoy a trip through Posner’s sharp and beautifully unsentimental mind. (Oh, and he also has some very smart things to say about “parasitic” blogs and “derivative” bloggers.) A taste:

Journalists are reluctant to confess to pandering to their customers’ biases; it challenges their self-image as servants of the general interest, unsullied by commerce. They want to think they inform the public, rather than just satisfying a consumer demand no more elevated or consequential than the demand for cosmetic surgery in Brazil or bullfights in Spain. They believe in ”deliberative democracy” - democracy as the system in which the people determine policy through deliberation on the issues. In his preface to ”The Future of Media” (a collection of articles edited by Robert W. McChesney, Russell Newman and Ben Scott), Bill Moyers writes that ”democracy can’t exist without an informed public.” If this is true, the United States is not a democracy (which may be Moyers’s dyspeptic view). Only members of the intelligentsia, a tiny slice of the population, deliberate on public issues.