I'm willing to bet you're watching it with the sound off.

Are you fucking serious?????????

Also, can any staffers confirm that Charles is currently in a stall in the Stranger men's room with a laptop?

charles, other than featuring photogenic, well-built women of color in b&w, these videos have nothing in common. really.

@1 - You forgot to add "in the nude. And with some handi-wipes near by."

Yeaaahh, I kinda have a thing for this video too. She's beautiful (I'm transfixed by that ass. . . geezus. . .) and a genius at writing songs that are fun to hear. Even if they're stupid.

@5:

I was thinking more like a travel size bottle of Jergens.

@6:
"genius..."?????????

Don' get out much do you?

I don't care what others think. I love her. Love her.

That song = very catchy. Damn.

@9 - But do you beat off to her? Because that's the main thrust of Charles's, uh, thrust.

Utterly terrible. I got half-way through before I just couldn't handle any more.

50 times? 50? Hidden Power? What the hell is wrong with you?

Jennifer Hudson got the Oscar, but she also got the murdered family.

Meanwhile, Beyonce is content to do a "Pon de Replay" knockoff, neglecting to add a hook.

(This song makes "Womanizer" seem sophisticated.)

Charles you already mentioned the Grace Jones song awhile back and discussed it's meaning. To use it again to justify watching the Beyoncé video just seems weak.
Even though Grace is a good artist, much different than Beyoncé she is stalled in her music. She sounds like she did in the late 80's, which is not too terrible because she could be worse like Beyoncé who is more of a celebrity generated from PR spin that is about her looks than actual talent. What you should have mentioned is Grace distorted herself to draw attention to the concept of physical beauty in women. But you just created a post from some weak connection because you are transfixed by the physical attraction to Beyoncé. No matter how intellectual you try to make your post sound it comes off as trivial.

Except for the very end, is that video done all in one take? That's impressive, but as impressive as Feist's video for 1234.

I like that the video still makes her look like a hunchback. HAH.

And they're all off in synchronization.

I refuse to watch/listen to this. It will infuse popular culture soon enough and I won't be able to escape it. But I will try.

She lept way, way over the shark when she sang for the direct tv commercial. O-M-G I hated her so much after the millionth time I had to view that. Tivo, where were you when I was in need?

Two words: Mexican Breakfast - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9xer2luUXo

Sloggers should know better!

I agree, it's impressive to see a pop star full-out dancing with only the bare minimum of editing FOR ONCE. The song and the dance are aggressively appealing.

@8:

Heh.

"at writing songs that are fun to hear"

Can YOU write a catchy pop song? I sure as fuck can't. And she sure as fuck can. :)

Did no one notice that most of the dance moves are a direct ripoff of an old Fosse piece featuring Gwen Verdon that was all the rage with the video mashup crowd earlier this year?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9xer2luUXo

@17 - I can't believe it took 17 comments for that link to appear. Where my gays at?!

Geez. If The Stranger web site didn't regularly take about 5 minutes to digest my submission my post wouldn't have been redundant.

CHARLES, I AM TOTALLY WITH YOU. I CANNOT STOP WATCHING IT.

Schmader, we are in a fight.

It's interesting how cheap music videos have become. There was a time when the record companies would make a large investment in the video of a star of her caliber.

she outta whore this song to ee robins.

Charles, I'm totally with you on this. I continue to be spellbound by the thing. It's thrilling in the same way that episode of planet earth with the birds of paradise doing their startling, excellent displays is thrilling, and such a relief from videos weighed down by story lines. It also more or less perfectly transposes the effect of the dance to which it's a reference (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfACM-xB904), in terms of the response elicited by those now-silly pelvic isolation moves

I love the Gwen Verdon video with "Single Ladies" playing over it. Cracks me up for some reason. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcNGi3c0MdA

But yes, I saw a hip hop dance troupe here in NYC dance to the song on Sunday and they tore it up. It's been in my head since then and I haven't been able to stop watching the video either.

Except it's kinda sad how Beyonce is good on all the typical booty-shaking, but is sloppy on the moves that need to be precise and exact. Her backups blow her out of the water.

I'm now going to watch Gwen Verdon 50 times in a row, that's for certain.

beyonce knowles and shakira is all that a man can ask for.

btw @20... I'd call it an homage rather than a ripoff.

What? Nobody posted the totally gay, totally twink amateur version yet? I'm shocked!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGemjUvafBw

You know someone had to do it.

...i used to hate her - ' i cain't pay my automo-bill'- and now i hate to like her..

She must have a great waxer.

Seriously: when did the French cut come back? Nothing is less complimentary to a woman's figure. Beyoncé is the most beautiful woman on earth, yet her butt looks like a square block of cheese in that cut.

Is this a bubblegum song?

@8

As someone who DOES get out much I can honestly say that, yes, Beyonce is one smart lady when it comes to her collaborations and music. A person CAN be a "genius" in concern with certain aspects of a given field while at the same time be incompetent in any other respect.

Beyonce knows what she is, knows what her strengths are and she uses them in consistently brilliant ways. While I'm not a fan of a lot of her music- I do feel like when it comes to creating driving, catchy, memorable beats and rhythms she really is a genius. When it comes to using her image and her sex appeal she is also a genius. When it comes to exploiting it with dance she is, once again, a genius.

When it comes to content or lyrics? She's a moron. But please, do not be ignorant or too high and mighty by suggesting that she is not brilliant in other respects. She knows what she's doing, and although the depth of her content is more shallow than a dollhouse saucer-dish, the strength of her tunes and sexy image more than make up for it- as long as you are in the mood to dance.

@34 - Well, it was certainly "sticking" to Charles. Heh. Heh heh. Heh heh heh. Heh heh. Heh.

@35 - "I do feel like when it comes to creating driving, catchy, memorable beats and rhythms she really is a genius."

Mmmmm - spoken like another true "genius".

Tell you what, when that footage of her slaving away in the studio, progamming and putting together those "memorable beats and rhythms" all by her big-bootied self, you come back and give us a holler, you hear?

Fucking moron.

Pardon me - when that footage pops up on YouTube, is what I meant to say.

Fucking moron.

19 - "fun to hear" is entirely subjective, and "genius" is quite a stretch for someone who does not write her own music and minimally involved in its production.

@34: bubblegum is the highest form of pop art.

Whatever about Beyonce's ass, you guys--check out that lady's sweet bionic arm! Dang!

Bap bap BOOM, get a life. Or better yet, read my entire post instead of centering in on a single thing I said.

Taken out of context one could be a moron, such as you, and conclude something that I did not mean. Go back and read it again. Guess what I mentioned. Come on, it's rather important!

I'll just give you the answer: "collaboration". She worked together with incredibly talented people. Of course she didn't sit alone in a studio and compose all this music by herself! But she did sit in a studio with talented musicians and work it out. Some of the greatest musical works in history were the product of collaboration. And while I do not, for a single second, think of Beyonce as one of the greatest musicians of our time, a lot of what she helps to produce really is impressive.

To say something as horribly elitist and ignorant as "you need to be able to do everything yourself to be considered a genius" is to admit you have no idea what you are talking about, and that YOU, in fact, are the true idiot.

And @39- from what research I was able to garner she does, in fact, have a rather heavy hand when it comes to her music and its production. Where are you getting your ideas from? Pure speculation?

#20 this is just cemented proof that Bob Fosse's choreography was so solid and timeless that it could be set to anything.
Gwen Verdon just out-danced Beyonce.

Charles, just start a soft core porn blog and be done with it.

@42 - Spending about 20 to 25 lines discussing - nay, defending - Beyonce, yet telling someone else to get a life. My, what a humorous little piece of snot we are.

johnny liverwurst. the point still stands; she doesnt actually write her own songs by herself and most certainly isnt the lead song writer or producer of her music. the claim was that she writes and produces this all herself.

Thank you 17,20, and 27 for making my day

@46

The claim was not that she writes and produces this all herself. I said it at the beginning of my original comment, and I said it again in the follow-up comment: she collaborates with others.

So does Bjork (someone who, in my opinion, really IS one of the greats), so does Bowie, so do so many other amazing artists. And while, I must stress AGAIN, I do not think Beyonce is on the same level or caliber as those artists, I do not think she should be punished or insulted or called a hack for collaborating on her music production.

I'm sorry if my original statement didn't repeat the word "collaboration" more than once, but it is there, and that is what I meant. She is no singer/songwriter, but that is not a requirement to be really, really good at what you do.

By the way, I am in no way a Beyonce fanboy. While I enjoy a couple of her songs I mostly avoid her work. This defense I'm giving may make me appear otherwise, but it's true. I just hate it when people go "OMG you like something MAINSTREAM or POPULAR? EWWWWWWWWW GROSS!" It's juvenile and immature.

@46: who gives a shit who wrote it? Are they buddies of yours? If it's a good song, it's a good song, period. If you're more concerned about the tabloid personality, then yes, it's just AWFUL what's going on here, but if you're listening to music, LISTEN to it. The Beach Boys didn't play on Pet Sounds, either, but SOMEBODY did, and it was good. I think this is a pretty good record.

i vote "genius" as the most over-used word of all time.

go ahead and call me an ignorant elitist, johnny, but if an artist cannot "do everything" his/herelf, they are not a musical genius. if that word applies to beyonce, it has no meaning whatsoever.

A better comparison for Beyonce/Fosse:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlfCPEYjpz0

Although I'm not sure WTFs happening at the end.

Fnarf, look who originally applied adoration to a person for their great talent in creating the songs and seems ignorant of how songs are made. It wasn't me. A good song is a good song but crediting someone with song making ability when it's mostly singing ability really doesn't hit the mark right.

And when someone such as Beyonce uses auto-tune software when recording, they really don' have much singing ability anyway.

I don't know from auto-tune software but I know kick-ass production and fun, effective pop hooks when I hear them.

Haters are way off on this one...the song rules.

@48 - Continuing in your now quite impressive train of ignorance, trying to slot Bowie in with the big-bootied bore or the little Icelandic penguin when it comes to their "collaborative" methods is about so off the mark as to be ridiculous.

Enjoy the ass. Just try not to talk about music. Of which you know squat.

She ripped off these gals...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KU3N5c2Kxnw

Charles - you give me the creeps time and time again but I have to agree with you that that video is transfixing. ... Although I think I may like it for reasons other than yourself.

Ha! There is this one part around the 1:30 mark where she does this insane kick-boxing type move 2 or 3 times that I feel I need to teach myself. Also interesting, apparently she didn't even want a ring from Jay-Z

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20231956,00.html?xid=rss-topheadlines