Chow Holy Hooters
posted by May 19 at 8:59 AM
onEnough of the heavy and sad stories from the Holy Land…
…Let’s read something light and breezy:
Ofer Ahiraz, a gray-haired 48-year-old… and his wife Ilana… opened [a] Hooters franchise last November, putting Israel on the list of over 40 nations that have imported the American icon.Ilana, also 48, is not a waitress, although her admiration for the Hooters girls is clear - especially since the Ahirazes’ daughter, Gal, works as head waitress and trainer. Like any good Jewish parents, the Ahirazes sent their eldest daughter to college - at Hooters University in Atlanta, Georgia, where Gal studied for three months to learn the principles behind the Hooters mystique.
The Ahirazes have adapted the chain’s food and atmosphere to suit Israeli tastes and mentalities. They replaced Hooters’ crab, pork and oyster dishes with more salads and grilled meats, but they still serve up world-famous Hooters chicken wings, along with Philly steak and chicken burgers. Wings are made with the time-tested Hooters buttery-vinaigrette hot sauce and come in five levels of spiciness.
Comments
I'm so going to Israel now. Exploding buses be damned!
I don't care how many times The Stranger tries to make Hooters into some hipster-ironic version of cool. Hooters is stupid and the less said about it the better.
Under that rant elenchos, I see a thinly veiled tasty chicken liberation agenda.
@ 2
word.
Stupidity and Hooters... America's exports.
A gray-haired 48-year-old? Growl!
Right on, @2, 4, 5.
You wouldn't think America would need to export a messed-up attitude toward women, since that's already plentiful throughout the world, but hey, I guess we can always put our stupid spin on anything.
If these ladies want to come to the US and study at one of our fine institutions of higher learning, like Hooters University, I for one welcome them with open arms.
Wait, Hooters had to open up a "university" to teach franchisees their "mystique"?
Lessee: what you need is, 37 big-screen TV's showing every sports channel available on cable, and a menu consisting solely of deep-fried everything served by attractive, if not particularly erudite young women sporting ample cleavidge compressed beneath skin-tight tank-tops, and add high-cut satin shorts over flesh-colored nylons.
Next, open for business, watch cash roll in like a tsunami.
Sheesh, I could have taught them that in about 30 seconds...
Yes Russia, Latin America, Thailand, India Saudia Arabia had no fucked up notions about women and gender till we exported Hooters. Exporting Hooters is a crime, leading to mail order brides, prostitution, sex tourism, mutilation, stoning, and the use of blonde bombshells on TV in places like Mexico where there aren't even that many blondes.
All these other places were innocent, pure and equal till we fucked them up.
Damn us globalizers!
Ew, what's up with the flesh-coloured nylons? Are those sexy now?
Flesh-colored nylons are disgusting.
@12 - Yeah, those are ridiculous. Considering the rest of the "uniform" they're not using those for warmth. Is every Hooters server being treated for varicose veins or low blood pressure?
If there's really butter in that hot sauce, it's still not kosher.
are the wings kosher?
I'm sorry...I was looking for the Kay Barnes champagne room.
@2: this one is just Charles. You know he'll post about anything he can include a picture of boobs with.
charles is a douche pass it on.
If it bugs the Hassidim I'm in. Anything that liberalizes in Israel is great because there can be no substantive peace talks without a general move to more liberal ideas, although the Muslims are gonnna hate this more than 2, 4, 5 and 7.
Here's what the real story is here: This is all a prelude to Charles Mudede, following in the footsteps of Josh Feit, quitting The Stranger in order to start a chain restaurant called 10,000 Hooters.
Yep, you guessed it: The waitstaff will consist entirely of absurdly big-breasted clones of Natalie Merchant, in suitable cleavage-enhancing attire, endlessly serving hot wings to sad, old, and lonely men.
For some reason every time I see something Hooters related I'm reminded of South Park's "Raisins."
@17 - true.
Where's Issur when you need him?
*BARF*
Yes, apparently, I'm not the first to think of Natalie Merchant when I see Charles post this. This sad, old, lonely man wouldn't mind seeing Ms. M. in such a ridiculous getup, just for yuks. If they make orange shorty shorts for hips that wide.
Of course, she's a vegan, so no chicken wings will be served.
Comments Closed
In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).