Sex The Spray On Condom
posted by on November 27 at 10:24 AM
I get letters at “Savage Love” every day from men who insist that the split second it takes to put on a condom—and it only takes a second, guys, if you’re smart enough to remove the condom from its wrapper before you get busy—is a boner assassin. All it takes is that momentary distraction and—phffft—they’re soft and it’s over. Let’s watch TV, honey.
So I don’t think the makers of the new “spray-on condom” are gonna be rich anytime soon.
The system works a bit like a car wash. The man put his penis in a chamber and presses a button to start the jets of liquid latex, sucked from a detachable cartridge. The rubber dries in seconds and is later rolled off and discarded like a conventional condom.The aim is for the process to take just 10 seconds but at present the latex drying time is around 20 to 25 seconds. “We’re working to shorten that time,” said Krause.
“In a survey we conducted, men had a two-fold reaction to the idea. Some said it’s a great idea and would help them because they can’t find conventional condoms that fit them. Others say they can’t imagine it working in practice. There’s the romance factor: applying the condom does interfere with the sex act.”
No shit. In other disincentives, the spray-on condom chamber is large and expensive and so are the latex cartridges—and you can’t fit the chamber in your wallet either. And given a choice between putting up with ill-fitting condoms or leaping out of bed and shoving their hard cocks into a box for a 15 second blast of ice-cold liquid latex men are going to continue to put up with those ill-fitting condoms.
Couldn't they make the spray device look like the guy's favorite sexual receptacle?
It could come in different varieties for different orientations. Build it into a blow up sex doll for chrissake.
Who the fuck comes up with this shit?
Also, one has to have a pretty delicate boner if they can't keep it hard for a split second.
Actually, I think Mistresse Matisse could probably find some interesting uses for the ice-cold latex-spraying cock-in-the-box thing. But for the rest of us, not so much.
Who can't find one that fits? You can stretch one of those things over your arm, for crying out loud. People's excuses are just ridickulous.
Dick-in-a-box!!!
Aaaahahahaha!
"You can stretch one of those things over your arm, for crying out loud."
Er, I don't think that the condom being too small is the problem there.
Really? From hot to limp in a couple seconds? Maybe such guys' biggest problem isn't the condom.
This product is just waiting to suck.
Vacuum pump, anyone?
The resevoir tip would be difficult too.
Actually the best virtue of this dohicky is the fact that there probably isn't a better way to get your own presized condoms ... especially since not all of your errections are equal.
They are after a few years of dating, Matt. Trust me, I know.
My cock is huge and I personally prefer the tighter Kimono condoms.
I'm a grad student in science ... I do know what depressing sex is like ... even then .... I STILL know that all my erections are equal ... well at least the ones I'm sober enough to remember ...
This scares me.
sorry NOT equal
@5:
Muggims -- the thing that really makes Slog NSFW is how loudly I shrieked with laughter upon reading your comment.
As for the product in question, long years with Dan's column proves that some guys will like this. They will like it far too much. And then they'll tell us about it in the Lovecast.
It's still probably better than the female condom.
Here's a serious question that I'm hoping someone can answer. Why don't condoms come in a variety of sizes?
I've heard that men are embarrassed about going to the check out line with a box of 'small' condoms. That's BS. As they do with women's clothing, the manufacturers could use vanity sizing starting at 'large' and going to 'dangerously huge'. It's a fixable problem.
So why isn't there a better (more realistic) set of condom sizes? Dan, maybe I should send this over as a Savage Love question.
LLAA should distribute this box in a combo-pack with a pipe and some crystal meth.
I think the problem is that the guys are putting the condoms on themselves. If your partner puts the condom on you, that usually doesn't result in boner destruction - unless the guy is REALLY self-conscious about his package. And if you're embarrassed at having your partner SEE your unit when they put a condom on it, should you really be playing hide-the-sausage with someone with whom you're that insecure?
I can't speak to male size queens, but most women I know aren't going to pull out a ruler along with the rubber to see if you measure up, so calm down and let your partner array you in latex loveliness.
So you stick your cock in a box, and it comes out covered in latex? I don't think I'd want to buy one of these, but it sure would be fun to try out.
Sure, sure, loads of fun you say. UNTIL you accidentally hook up a bottle of mace instead of liquid latex by mistake. THEN who's laughing.
No thanks. When I stick Admiral Wanky in a hole, I prefer to do the spraying.
And what if you get latex in your urethra? Eww.
I could see it being a turn on for some of the rubber fetish crowd. And there's nothing saying they couldn't use a little heater to warm it up to skin temperature.
OH! Oh! I know!
An entire body contraption, kinda shaped like an Iron Lung. Spray down the whole body except the head...REALY safe sex...and the latex can come in diferent colors so you can use it for Halloween to make yourself an instant super hero!
YES.
I'm wondering if I could put my hand in there?
No, no latex fisting in my future, but there are times you just don't want fingerprints left laying around . . .
"HONEST Officer! I was just getting ready for some REALLY rough sex! Here in the bank!"
When they mentioned spray-on condoms I was thinking it would come in a can like Cheez Whiz or Redi Whip.
PSSSSSHHT!!! Aaaaaaaaaand your done!!!
This was mentioned last year on SNL's Weekend Update. I almost wet my pants when they said, "The company hopes it will be more successful than their iron-on condom."
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