Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« Pope Attempts to Smooth Things... | Norwescon Saturday: Report Two »

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Your Child With Christ

posted by on March 22 at 17:10 PM


You could wait for the rapture to see your child with Christ. But your faith, however strong, doesn’t guarantee that your child is going to wind up in heaven with you. Let’s face facts: your kid could go wrong—he could go gay, or vote Democratic, or wind up working for Planned Parenthood. So don’t wait. Let Amanda Kay put your child in Christ’s arms today. Says Amanda…

I love creating unique fine artwork for families to enjoy for years to come. I especially love to see the faces of the children when they first see themselves with Christ. With my husband’s support, we created Kay Paintings and Photography, a way for virtually everyone to be able to see themselves with The Savior. I want everyone to feel the joy of seeing their family with Christ.

Ordering info here.

Thanks to Slog tipper David.

RSS icon Comments


Huh. Note the URL on this one, ped indeed

Posted by bob | March 22, 2008 5:27 PM

I wonder if they'd do one of Christ spooning me in a grassy field.

Posted by Tdub | March 22, 2008 5:30 PM

I didn't know Jesus ate babies...

Posted by bma | March 22, 2008 5:31 PM

yeah, you know, christ, but not too jewish-looking. someone who looks like he could play christ in a disney film. but don't go too far and make him blond...yes, this model will do perfectly.

Posted by ellarosa | March 22, 2008 5:34 PM

All you godless fornicating sodomites over at this Strangler newspaper will never find your way to heaven.

Posted by amanda kay | March 22, 2008 5:43 PM

That's one hunky Jesus. Christ is risen, indeed.

btw, I'm in Chicago tonight. I think I'll head over to the Gentry and ask if anyone remembers Dan. If not, I'll go to Frenchy's. I'm sure he has a following there ;-)

Posted by catalina vel-duray | March 22, 2008 5:45 PM

OK, so the little baby is Jesus? Who's the white guy in the polyester smock?

Posted by Lee Gibson | March 22, 2008 5:46 PM

How perfect, especially considering how white and WASPy looking Christ was.

Anyone else get a child molester vibe from that photo?

Posted by Brandon H | March 22, 2008 5:54 PM

Christian Bale?

Posted by Dr. Savage Mudede | March 22, 2008 5:55 PM

I like how this person thinks that a baby can distinguish between Christ and any other happy man with a beard.

Posted by The CHZA | March 22, 2008 5:56 PM

Oh, Catalina -- go to the Weiner Circle on Clark between Diversy and Fullerton. Get a char polish -- you'll love it. And if you're in Chicago on Monday, Sidetracks for musical comedy night. It's heaven.

Posted by Dan Savage | March 22, 2008 5:57 PM

And I never drank at Gentry back in the day. Sidetracks, the Loading Dock (RIP), the Bushes (RIP), Berlin... not that they'll remember me there. Been a long, long time.

Posted by Dan Savage | March 22, 2008 6:02 PM

How perfect! One to go alongside the other pictures of Junior with Santa and the Easter Bunny.
What I'd like to see is a full-grown adult in that pose with The Lord.

Posted by Madashell | March 22, 2008 6:03 PM

I KNEW Jesus was white and here's the photo to prove it.

Posted by Sargon Bighorn | March 22, 2008 6:11 PM

Well, I suppose we could take up a collection and get one of Dan.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty | March 22, 2008 6:14 PM

OMG Can adults do it too??

Posted by catnextdoor | March 22, 2008 6:16 PM

I think I've seen Jesus on Capitol Hill. But a lot of white guys with beards look alike.

Click on Amanda Kay's name @5 and check out the picture. Absolutely brilliant. Unless of course she really is a fundamentalist troll in which case it's more than a bit creepy...

Posted by RainMan | March 22, 2008 6:39 PM

@12: Berlin...oh my gawd. 1987. I met the cutest guy from Evanston there. Thanks for the flashback.

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | March 22, 2008 7:02 PM

"Mommy, who's the man with me in this photo?"

"That's Jesus, dear."

"But Mommy, why am I with Jesus in that photo?"

"Because you're dead, dear."

Posted by erika | March 22, 2008 7:21 PM

The long sleeve red undergarment is suspicious - a bit hot for someone from the levant, no? Jesus must be hiding needle tracks. I guess if he died for our sins, he can certainly shoot up for them if he wants too. Still I don't think I'd want junkie Jesus grabbing my kid that way.

Posted by kinaidos | March 22, 2008 7:26 PM

Speaking as one of the few actively practicing Christians who read and enjoy Slog, that is one of the most disturbing things I haveever seen.

Posted by Sheryl | March 22, 2008 8:01 PM

I think that Christ was on the TV show "Emergency" back in the day.

Posted by poster girl | March 22, 2008 8:30 PM

Lee Gibson @ #7,

It's Joseph and he's thinking "Holy Shit this kid looks nothing like me. I am so getting that DNA test done."

Joseph: Mary, the baby ain't mine.
Mary: God made a miracle.
Joseph: A miracle, Is that what it's called now? I hope to hell 'God' is going to pay child support.
Mary: This baby is a miracle and it is a blessing to have him.
Joseph: So that's a no, right?

Posted by Y.F. | March 22, 2008 9:06 PM

What an amazingly white, European looking Christ.

Posted by ferin | March 22, 2008 9:27 PM

@21: Happy Easter, Sheryl.

Posted by RainMan | March 22, 2008 9:40 PM

Euro Christos - matters not your theory of who Jesus looks like ......

Remember that the love of any God is orgasmic.

And all you gay boys are entitled to let go a bit and work that theme.

This was all confirmed for me in a wonderful acid experience many years ago.Five of us, men and women, naked or loosly dressed - it was a wonderful long desert night. And one of the women had a three month old baby which was part of the new unfolding reality. Holding her at various moments was sacred to the max, new life, un blemished and full of potential, lacking malice.

Oh, I forgot, this post is a Dan style mock of religion, other peoples.

I don't do church but drink from the Chalice of Life every day. And I often hold hands with Jesus to celebrate the evening from the past. He has great hands, one of his best features, to match the supple body and sweet breath.

I think I need some cool air and a shot or two of Jack.

Posted by Adam | March 22, 2008 11:09 PM

My little niece is going to Catholic school right now. (She is going to be a hellion, I'm sure of it.)

My father was showing her the different statues around the Church, and he came to one of Mary & Joseph. My father told her the first statue was of Mary, at which point my niece looked at the statue of Joseph and said "This must be uncle Scott!."

I must say there is a small resemblance.

Posted by Mary | March 23, 2008 7:07 AM

Check out the gallery on her site. The creep factor only goes up from here:

Posted by Irena | March 23, 2008 8:04 AM

Whoops, bob already linked to that second one. I meant to show the one with the little girl in slinky satin and disturbing come-hither look...

Posted by Irena | March 23, 2008 8:10 AM

@21 My mom reads Slog, so... you're not alone.

Posted by Dan Savage | March 23, 2008 8:16 AM

28 - The girl in the first picture looks like she's doing something naughty with Jesus. What a slut.

Posted by Mary | March 23, 2008 8:20 AM

If Jesus looked like THAT, I'd follow him just about ANYWHERE. Yum.

Posted by Wolf | March 23, 2008 8:53 AM

A perfect example how religion perverts reality. Jesus indeed! There are some twisted minds out there and this is photographic proof!

Posted by Vince | March 23, 2008 10:19 AM

We're trying to arrange an exclusive, show-all, photo spread with the model that plays Kay's Jesus. It's all down to numbers, agents and contracts right now.

Pray we succeed.

Posted by David K. | March 23, 2008 10:26 AM

You know that statue, that statue of Baby Jesus, in the window, of the 99-cent store? Last night I saw the owner kiss it, and whisper in his ear....

All the nonbelievers, they get to eat dirt, and the believers get to spit on their graves.

Posted by Regina Spektor's squeaky larynx | March 23, 2008 10:29 AM

Christ looks like a young Bob Seager.

Posted by tabletop_joe | March 23, 2008 10:46 AM

@36: Or Johnny Damon (that's a baseball reference for all you anti-sports anti-stadium anti-America types...)

Posted by bigyaz | March 23, 2008 3:59 PM

Damn. This is really going to cut into my "your child with Christian Bale" profits.

Posted by Marq | March 24, 2008 8:16 AM

I dunno, Jesus looks like a young James Brolin to me. Maybe that's why he married Barbra.

Posted by JD | March 24, 2008 9:15 AM

Dear sweet Jesus. Literally.

Posted by Stephen | March 24, 2008 2:19 PM

i'm going with a bearded corey feldman, esp in this one-

Posted by beardedcoreyfeldman | March 24, 2008 3:35 PM

"With my husband's support..."

No proof of this, but for some reason I get the impression the dude in the photos IS her husband.

Either way, ick ick ick ick ick.

Posted by cmh | March 24, 2008 6:04 PM

Jesus was in Blind Melon?

Posted by Kovalic | March 24, 2008 8:22 PM

I just threw up a little and it's pooled a bit in the back of my throat. This crap makes Kinkade look like a full blown master artist.

Posted by Susan | March 25, 2008 7:20 AM

My favorite part is that they're all just really bad photoshops.

Posted by Kaylie | March 25, 2008 11:52 PM

smaller value to the annual produce of its land and labour, according to >free christmas layouts for myspace quantity of the produce of domestic industry, by the intervention of gold jevbuaumpp

Posted by Linda | March 29, 2008 4:23 AM

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).