Religion Your Child With Christ
posted by March 22 at 17:10 PM
onYou could wait for the rapture to see your child with Christ. But your faith, however strong, doesn’t guarantee that your child is going to wind up in heaven with you. Let’s face facts: your kid could go wrong—he could go gay, or vote Democratic, or wind up working for Planned Parenthood. So don’t wait. Let Amanda Kay put your child in Christ’s arms today. Says Amanda…
I love creating unique fine artwork for families to enjoy for years to come. I especially love to see the faces of the children when they first see themselves with Christ. With my husband’s support, we created Kay Paintings and Photography, a way for virtually everyone to be able to see themselves with The Savior. I want everyone to feel the joy of seeing their family with Christ.
Ordering info here.
Thanks to Slog tipper David.
Comments
Huh. Note the URL on this one, ped indeed
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Ped.htm
I wonder if they'd do one of Christ spooning me in a grassy field.
I didn't know Jesus ate babies...
yeah, you know, christ, but not too jewish-looking. someone who looks like he could play christ in a disney film. but don't go too far and make him blond...yes, this model will do perfectly.
All you godless fornicating sodomites over at this Strangler newspaper will never find your way to heaven.
That's one hunky Jesus. Christ is risen, indeed.
btw, I'm in Chicago tonight. I think I'll head over to the Gentry and ask if anyone remembers Dan. If not, I'll go to Frenchy's. I'm sure he has a following there ;-)
OK, so the little baby is Jesus? Who's the white guy in the polyester smock?
How perfect, especially considering how white and WASPy looking Christ was.
Anyone else get a child molester vibe from that photo?
Christian Bale?
I like how this person thinks that a baby can distinguish between Christ and any other happy man with a beard.
Oh, Catalina -- go to the Weiner Circle on Clark between Diversy and Fullerton. Get a char polish -- you'll love it. And if you're in Chicago on Monday, Sidetracks for musical comedy night. It's heaven.
And I never drank at Gentry back in the day. Sidetracks, the Loading Dock (RIP), the Bushes (RIP), Berlin... not that they'll remember me there. Been a long, long time.
How perfect! One to go alongside the other pictures of Junior with Santa and the Easter Bunny.
What I'd like to see is a full-grown adult in that pose with The Lord.
I KNEW Jesus was white and here's the photo to prove it.
Well, I suppose we could take up a collection and get one of Dan.
OMG Can adults do it too??
I think I've seen Jesus on Capitol Hill. But a lot of white guys with beards look alike.
Click on Amanda Kay's name @5 and check out the picture. Absolutely brilliant. Unless of course she really is a fundamentalist troll in which case it's more than a bit creepy...
@12: Berlin...oh my gawd. 1987. I met the cutest guy from Evanston there. Thanks for the flashback.
"Mommy, who's the man with me in this photo?"
"That's Jesus, dear."
"But Mommy, why am I with Jesus in that photo?"
"Because you're dead, dear."
The long sleeve red undergarment is suspicious - a bit hot for someone from the levant, no? Jesus must be hiding needle tracks. I guess if he died for our sins, he can certainly shoot up for them if he wants too. Still I don't think I'd want junkie Jesus grabbing my kid that way.
Speaking as one of the few actively practicing Christians who read and enjoy Slog, that is one of the most disturbing things I haveever seen.
I think that Christ was on the TV show "Emergency" back in the day.
Lee Gibson @ #7,
It's Joseph and he's thinking "Holy Shit this kid looks nothing like me. I am so getting that DNA test done."
Joseph: Mary, the baby ain't mine.
Mary: God made a miracle.
Joseph: A miracle, Is that what it's called now? I hope to hell 'God' is going to pay child support.
Mary: This baby is a miracle and it is a blessing to have him.
Joseph: So that's a no, right?
What an amazingly white, European looking Christ.
@21: Happy Easter, Sheryl.
Euro Christos - matters not your theory of who Jesus looks like ......
Remember that the love of any God is orgasmic.
And all you gay boys are entitled to let go a bit and work that theme.
This was all confirmed for me in a wonderful acid experience many years ago.Five of us, men and women, naked or loosly dressed - it was a wonderful long desert night. And one of the women had a three month old baby which was part of the new unfolding reality. Holding her at various moments was sacred to the max, new life, un blemished and full of potential, lacking malice.
Oh, I forgot, this post is a Dan style mock of religion, other peoples.
I don't do church but drink from the Chalice of Life every day. And I often hold hands with Jesus to celebrate the evening from the past. He has great hands, one of his best features, to match the supple body and sweet breath.
I think I need some cool air and a shot or two of Jack.
My little niece is going to Catholic school right now. (She is going to be a hellion, I'm sure of it.)
My father was showing her the different statues around the Church, and he came to one of Mary & Joseph. My father told her the first statue was of Mary, at which point my niece looked at the statue of Joseph and said "This must be uncle Scott!."
I must say there is a small resemblance.
Check out the gallery on her site. The creep factor only goes up from here:
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Hth.htm
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Ped.htm
Whoops, bob already linked to that second one. I meant to show the one with the little girl in slinky satin and disturbing come-hither look...
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Wht.htm
@21 My mom reads Slog, so... you're not alone.
28 - The girl in the first picture looks like she's doing something naughty with Jesus. What a slut.
If Jesus looked like THAT, I'd follow him just about ANYWHERE. Yum.
A perfect example how religion perverts reality. Jesus indeed! There are some twisted minds out there and this is photographic proof!
We're trying to arrange an exclusive, show-all, photo spread with the model that plays Kay's Jesus. It's all down to numbers, agents and contracts right now.
Pray we succeed.
You know that statue, that statue of Baby Jesus, in the window, of the 99-cent store? Last night I saw the owner kiss it, and whisper in his ear....
All the nonbelievers, they get to eat dirt, and the believers get to spit on their graves.
Christ looks like a young Bob Seager.
@36: Or Johnny Damon (that's a baseball reference for all you anti-sports anti-stadium anti-America types...)
Damn. This is really going to cut into my "your child with Christian Bale" profits.
I dunno, Jesus looks like a young James Brolin to me. Maybe that's why he married Barbra.
Dear sweet Jesus. Literally.
i'm going with a bearded corey feldman, esp in this one-
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Hth.htm
"With my husband's support..."
No proof of this, but for some reason I get the impression the dude in the photos IS her husband.
Either way, ick ick ick ick ick.
http://www.kaypaintings.com/GalleryPages/Trs.htm
Jesus was in Blind Melon?
I just threw up a little and it's pooled a bit in the back of my throat. This crap makes Kinkade look like a full blown master artist.
My favorite part is that they're all just really bad photoshops.
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