Celeb Hide Yer Tallboys! Guard Yer Kools! It’s Another Spears!
posted by June 19 at 12:56 PM
onIt is my sad duty to inform you that the dread Spears Gene—a faulty allele associated with unabashed white-trashness, exhibitionistic sluttery, and vile, gum-smacking republican tendencies—has scored yet another Darwinian triumph:
People and Us Weekly are reporting that Jamie Lynn Spears has given birth to a baby girl.
This tragic news has, of course, been accompanied by massive flooding in the Midwest and a tornado or two, and if Revelations can be trusted (and I’m really beginning to wonder), the wise would do well to prepare for, like, spontaneous rains of toads or some kind of weird shit like that. Wear a hat maybe. Couldn’t hurt.
Comments
I heard that you could totally see the baby's entire vagina as it stepped out of the womb. Not a hair on it. Slut.
Well, I hope her delivering MD sewed her back up nice 'n' tight, or she ain't never goin' ta git another boyfriend all stretched out like that. It's hard enough for a girl after she ain't sixteen no more.
That baby is literally a product of bad pop culture. If tweenage girls and middle-aged men had only chose to ignore that cross-eyed schoolgirl all those years ago, this would have never happened. We only have ourselves to blame, and now the human race must suffer.
Or it would have happened anyhow, but with different players, just like it is everywhere right now.
fnarf make adrian laff.
jaimie lynn spears is an inspiration to 14 year old mothers everywhere.
when i'm 60 it will be legal to hit that.
...thus ensuring that Jamie Lynn Spears will be a grandmother by the time she is 35.
Thanks Perez
@ 8: suck a pipe, asshole.
Sales of Gerber Pork Rinds soar.
seattle is so liberal and open minded. we can no longer make fun of the gays, the blacks or the women, but thank god there's always good old white trash stereotypes & authentic hick language to fall back on. it must be a terrible burden being the arbiter of good taste.
whut? hey 'leven! U makin fun o' my daddy-mama?
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