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Friday, May 23, 2008

The Morning News

posted by on May 23 at 8:18 AM

McCain: Denounces Nazi-loviní reverend, misses GI-bill vote, releases medical records, supports separate-but-equal gay unions.

Please, God, I Ask for so Little: Clinton as running mate.

Red Hot: The wildfire news cycle begins.

Red Planet: NASA Mars lander may touch down Sunday.

Red Car: SLUT averaging eight riders per one-way trip.

Red Rover, Red Rover: Subpoena sends Karl over.

In the Red: National real-estate index down, Seattle up.

Right on Red: Twister rips through Godís country.

Bad Form: Bush wants us to foot a bigger bill.

Good Form: California racing to develop new marriage applications.

Good View: Woman strips for hooting construction workers.

Good Lord: Bigots seek to delay implementing marriage ruling.

Like a Rocky Year: Ford backs off from truck production.

May Poll: Clinton fares well in swing states.

UPDATE: Due to uninteresting reasons, I couldn’t post the Christian marriage thing till now, so here is the week’s final installment of Sexual Happiness in Marriage: A Christian Interpretation of Sexual Adjustment in Marriage, by Herbert J. Miles, Ph.D. Copyright 1967. Enjoy!

Our research on sexual adjustment in marriage involving 151 couples grew out of teaching marriage and family classes in sociology. Every couple which was counseled agreed to cooperate in the research, and 98 percent filled in questionnaires. It is probably safe to generalize that 90 to 95 percent of the sample were active, consecrated Christian individuals. [Here are a few results from the survey.]

Did you see each other naked the first night of the honeymoon?
Yes: 79.2%, No: 20.8%

When conditions are favorable, do you recommend that other young couples see each other naked on the first night of their honeymoon?
Husband: Yes 92.5%, No 7.5%
Wife: 89.9%, No 10.1%

Do either of you have any feeling that your sexual intercourse as husband and wife may be sort of shameful or evil?
Husband: None 99.3%, Slightly (sometimes), .7%
Wife: None, 98.0%, Slightly (sometimes) 2.0%

Did you take a bath before attempting sex relations on your wedding night?
Yes 50.7% No 49.3%

RSS icon Comments

1

the woman stripping story headline should have been: "It is about time it actually happened"...

Also, where is the latest edition of the Christian sex guide?

Posted by Mike in MO | May 23, 2008 9:07 AM
2

hrc as running mate: like taking out a large life insurance policy and making your estranged wife the beneficiary. before you hrc defenders pile on, remember-- we've seen the dirty pool she plays. there was a time when i would have scoffed at such a scenario. no longer.

Posted by ellarosa | May 23, 2008 9:15 AM
3

Blech. HRC as VP? Never. Never in a million years. Her husband wants it more than she does.

Posted by Balt-O-Matt | May 23, 2008 9:17 AM
4

HRC as running mate makes the baby Jesus cry. I hope Obama is planning on employing a food-taster.

Posted by AMB | May 23, 2008 9:33 AM
5

I'm glad I was not/will not be anywhere near ECB when she saw/sees that stripper story.

Posted by Mike of Renton | May 23, 2008 9:39 AM
6

Making Clinton his running mate would invalidate Obama's entire platform.

Posted by Sir Learnsalot | May 23, 2008 9:39 AM
7

The older female demographic will likely vote for Obama - and the 'hard working whites in Apalacia' aka racists will never vote for him so what exactly does Hillary bring to the ticket?

I know I will get flamed for this but I think Obama should take a cue from Lincoln and put Chuck Hagel on the ticket.

Its all about winning - Hillary, Al Gore, etc. may excite the base - but its the independants that make or break you in the election. Hagel compliments Obama in many ways - and I'm not just talking about being 'white & experienced'. He hammers home Obamas core 'unity' message and helps tamper his image as an 'ultra liberal'

Its important to remeber that the job of the VP is to work the back room and help pass the president's legislation. The dems won't have a filibuster proof majority in the senate - who better to flip a couple republican senators? Nebraska splits its electoral college votes - so Hagel would bring a couple of those with him - what other VP could do that?

I know the knee jerk reaction is to point to his voting record, his views on abortion, health care etc. However Hagel has made noise about moderating his views on abortion and as long as he agrees to support Obama - who cares how he voted under Bush - he wouldn't be the first politician who was more loyal than principled.

Jim Webb is kicked around for the same reasons but you risk losing a seat with Webb, plus the guy is somewhat of a loose cannon. Hagel is great on TV - very smooth and would gel nicely.

Bottom line: it's an unbeatable ticket.

Posted by DavidC | May 23, 2008 9:45 AM
8

No way. An anti-abortion VP? What if Obama has a stroke?

Posted by elenchos | May 23, 2008 10:11 AM
9

The SLUT is always empty -- I go past it twice a day during my commute. Saying that it's exceeding expectations is like Matthew Broderick on 30 Rock claiming that the visibly leaking ceiling isn't actually leaking because the gubment did a study that proved it.

It upsets me every time I see it's SLUTty face.

Posted by jackie treehorn | May 23, 2008 10:13 AM
10

The McCain gay unions link has been taken down. What does this mean??

Also, the SLUT will start getting more riders as more and more of us hapless peons have our workplaces transported there. (Mine moves next month.)

Posted by Will in 98103 | May 23, 2008 10:16 AM
11

Good View: Woman strips for hooting construction workers.

Haven't the news media ever heard the phrase "pics or it didn't happen" ?

Posted by K | May 23, 2008 10:18 AM
12

#6 is most certainly correct. You can't talk about going up against "more of the same" and talk about changing Washington, then pick Clinton as your VP.

Posted by w7ngman | May 23, 2008 10:46 AM
13

"Did you take a bath before attempting sex relations on your wedding night?
Yes 50.7% No 49.3%"

Is this Men and Women combined? Just Men? Just Women? Together? This statistic bothers me with its lack of detail!

Posted by Enigma | May 23, 2008 11:18 AM
14

Sure, I took a bath - earlier in the week. As I recall, back then I mostly took showers.

God, what a pervy question ...

Posted by Will in Seattle | May 23, 2008 11:29 AM
15

Since when did northern Colorado begin being lumped in with "God's Country?"

Posted by PopTart | May 23, 2008 11:59 AM
16

Dear lady in New Zealand:

WTF, way to encourage that shit. One woman out of thousands yelled at on streets across the world every day, and you raised the hopes of millions of neandertal fuckheads yelling "hey baby, nice ass" at women everywhere.

(I got hollered at by a truck full of construction workers yesterday in the pouring rain at 9a.m. and I'm still pretty pissed.)

Posted by Jessica | May 23, 2008 12:32 PM

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