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Tuesday, September 25, 2007

No One Tells Lindsay Lohan What to Do

posted by on September 25 at 9:56 AM

…but it’s nice of the Canterbury Institute to try, I guess.

From today’s New York Sun, where it appears as a full page ad:


The fine print:

While the rest of the world is going in and out of rehab, Canterbury Institute is changing the rules of addiction treatment. We’re offering innovative medical approaches to drug and alcohol addiction. It’s outpatient and administered by an ASAM-certified physician. All you need is 3-5 days to get back on track.

Having recently watched I Know Who Killed Me, Georgia Rule, AND Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen, I’m not sure I support any campaign to keep Lindsay Lohan alive, but, again, it’s nice of Canterbury to try.

RSS icon Comments


The lack of the comma in that giant headline makes the imperative even more chilling than was intended.

Posted by Nick | September 25, 2007 10:05 AM

Lindsay Wagner is going to rehab?!

My gawd, what a world...

Posted by Original Andrew | September 25, 2007 10:08 AM

I think they're a little late: Mayor Lindsay died some time ago.

I think you're wrong about Lohan, though.

MR/Paris, France

Posted by MATTHEW ROSE | September 25, 2007 10:13 AM

3-5 days? What do they do to you?

Actually, it seems that Lohan hasn't been the news for about 3-5 days. Maybe she took their advice?

Posted by what? | September 25, 2007 10:18 AM

You cut out the rape scene in Showgirls, but you somehow managed to sit through I Know Who Killed Me?

Posted by huh? | September 25, 2007 10:28 AM

#5: What can I say? I'm a sucker for stigmata-twin thrillers.

But seriously, IKWKM was fucking gross. It's the closest thing I've seen to the whole Saw-world of torture horror, and it was awful.

But then, those long-lost stigmata twins found each other, and everything was swell.

Posted by David Schmader | September 25, 2007 10:34 AM

The problem is you have to want to get off the junk. It doesn't seem like Lindsay is too interested.

Posted by keshmeshi | September 25, 2007 10:34 AM

Wow David, you must really be scraping the bottom of the 'ol Netflix queue. I would think the tabloids have a very real financial interest in keeping her alive.

Posted by longball | September 25, 2007 10:54 AM

#8: It's not just cinematic masochism. Since getting my doctorate in Showgirls, I'm required to watch all super-crappy movies, especially those featuring stripper poles (hello, I Know Who Killed Me!) and female sexual predators who kick lots of things but mysteriously earn the adoration of everyone around them (thank you, Georgia Rule).

There's no explaining Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen, though...

Posted by David Schmader | September 25, 2007 11:01 AM

I just like my haystacks, Bobby.

Posted by Mr. Poe | September 25, 2007 11:14 AM

I kind of love Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen.....

You couldn't pay me to watch IKWKM, though

Posted by genevieve | September 25, 2007 11:15 AM

@9- Oh duh, i knew that, sorry. I really could only watch one of these movies if you were there giving it your "Showgirls" treatment. Carry on Mr. Schmader.

Posted by longball | September 25, 2007 12:05 PM

I actually didn't mind that Drama Queen movie. It was just lite stuff for 12 year olds. No big whoop. Plus, it was back when Lindsey was a regular-sized teenager and not an angular, designer clothes-wearing diva.

Posted by me | September 25, 2007 12:18 PM

Yeah, she was a nice person to talk with back then - and then she went off the deep end.

Posted by Will in Seattle | September 25, 2007 12:41 PM

Companion headline: "Die, Paris!"

Posted by butterw | September 25, 2007 1:39 PM

Hi. I'm Will in Seattle. I know everybody, and I am connected to everything. Do you love me? I really want you to love me. Because if you can't tell, I have issues, and I'm a fucking loser.

Posted by xoxo Will in Seattle xoxo | September 25, 2007 2:19 PM

rest of the world? REST OF THE WORLD?

Posted by Bellevue Ave | September 25, 2007 3:45 PM

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