City Niketown’s New Ad Campaign
posted by on May 22 at 10:42 AM
Walking up Sixth Avenue yesterday I couldn’t help but notice Nike’s new ad campaign. Huge shots of famous athletes in action—mid-jump, mid-swing—next to equally huge shots of the soles of their athletic feet, complete with inspiring messages written on them with what looks like a Sharpie.
My first thought was… ugh. Feet don’t really do it for me. And these feet? Kinda scary. Standing on the sidewalk in front of Niketown I felt like the sole of this foot—this huge foot, a foot as long as I am tall—was about to come crashing down on me, stomping me into the sidewalk, and the last thing I would see before I died was… an inspirational message unworthy of a Successories poster. Not how I want to go.
My second thought? Man, it must be tough for foot fetishists to walk past Niketown these days. Sixth Avenue and Pike has to be off-limits to any businessman with a foot fetish—and that’s most businessmen, judging from my “Savage Love” mail—unless he’s not embarrassed to be seen with an obvious hard-on or is willing to carry his briefcase in front of his crotch, like a high school boy carries his books. Yeah, Niketown’s is pure torture for foot fetishists—sweet, sweet torture.
It’s also gotta sweet torture for macrophiliacs and crush fetishists.
A powerful shot starts here—yeah, you can say that again, Niketown.
If you enjoy those motivational Successories posters, you'll love these de-motivational posters.
Didn't you slobber all over some hooker feet in Skipping Towards Gomorrah?
Speaking of Successories (I had no idea that's what they were called), have you seen despair.com's spoof posters? Guffaw.
Yes, but at the suggestion of the hooker. Actually, at his insistence.
Sometimes a lame marketing campaign is just a lame marketing campaign.
Or a cigar.
Or someone's wife, or possibly his hat.
Anyway.
I'm on 6th ave almost every day to catch my bus- I think it would make my morning to see an army of business men walking down the street with hard ons. Just sayin'.
My first thought: bastinado and falaka. And lest you think that's just something that other people do, well, they often do it on behalf of "the good guys". (It's done in your name, so it's your responsibility and no, it doesn't matter how you voted). At least Iran and the Taliban admit they do it and aren't hypocritical about its legality.
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