Life Good Morning, Wikipedia. I Missed You.
posted by on February 9 at 7:52 AM
I’m back. After five (or was it six?) weeks of sleeping on floors, being crammed into vans, and getting an up close and personal tour of Western Europe’s squats and bars and and rock clubs, I’m finally back.
I missed the robust water pressure of American showers. I missed clean clothes. I missed beds and, the few times I got a bed, missed not having to share a bed. But more than anything, I missed Wikipedia.
The nine of us (two bands and me) were almost never near computers. We were riding in the tour van, sitting in the clubs, or walking down the street. You can have conversations in all of these places, these places without the magic of reference materials and online searching, but it is not advisable. Dozens of questions will go unanswered: Was that Swedish band the Knutters spelled with a ‘K’ or an ‘N’? (Answer: K.) Dozens of easily-avoidable arguments will erupt ‘Holland’ only refers to part of the Netherlands. No, ‘Holland’ refers to the entirety of the Netherlands. No, fuck you. (Answer: both, kind of.)
Now I can wallow in reference material, happy as a pig in slop. Top three on my list of Stuff People Kept Talking About But I Couldn’t Look Up: the conspiracy theories about chemtrails, the cancer-fighting effects of vitamin B-17, and the purpose of bile.
I’m also curious about the crime rate in Umeå, a great young London band called the Metros, and whether there really was a Swedish candy called a “Negro-ball.” (Answer: yes.)
If you need me, I’ll be looking stuff up.
Now I completely understand why my friend has a crush on you.
Holland refers to two of 12 provinces within the Netherlands, North and South Holland. As most of the cities non-Netherlanders visit are in one of the two, and and as a unified state comprising those provinces and not Belgium or Luxembourg is a fairly recent invention, the part has come to stand for the whole for non-Netherlanders.
Much more interestingly, friends in Berlin have emailed with an explanation of your earlier post on German insults. Quoting:
"turnbeutelvergesser: gym-bag-forgetter
we finally found out why this is insulting.
"A gym bag forgetter is that wimpy nerd guy who doesn't want to participate in gym class so he constantly 'forgets' his gym strip so he can sit on the bench and watch instead of playing with the other boys. The female equivalent would probably be someone who has her period every week. Not sure how to translate this into german yet."
Holland is part of the Netherlands, not the entirety.
I know how you feel. My dream is for a pocket-sized version of Wiki (not unlike The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) that I can carry around with me. I know Blackberries and PDAs are kind of like this, but I don't want all that extra bullshit. Just the Wiki.
look up the term "guindaloon." not sure of the spelling...
Speaking of the Netherlands/Holland, the mayor of Amsterdam decided to allow a Gay Kids Boat in this summer's Pride Parade!
They have those swedish treats here in Denmark, too, and they were officially referred to as 'Nigger-buns' -- officially! -- until like three years ago. People here are still flabbergasted as to why the name was changed.
You should have had The Stranger spring for a Blackberry...then you would have Wikipedia at your fingertips, in all its clunky, slowly-loading, 100x200 pixel glory! But it doesn't let you post on the Slog, unfortunately.
Welcome back, sweet prince.
On a recent trip to Barcelona, we found these, in almost every store:
http://www.educared.net/PrimerasNoticias/hemero/2003/marzo/soci/congui/congui.htm
they are chocolate covered peanuts.
For a nice article on chemtrails check out
the Fringe Reporter at http://fringereporter.blogspot.com/
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