Life I, Anonymous: The Dina Martina Christmas Show Edition
posted by on December 11 at 9:36 AM
In my experience, The Dina Martina Christmas Show has brought nothing but feelings of great joy and vague nausea. But for one (classically passive-aggressive) Seattlite, Dina’s show became a forum for scalpal assault and sucky single-entendre humor.
To the creepy faggot I had to sit next to at the Dina Martina show last Thursday: for the record, it is NEVER okay to give someone you do not know a noogie. You freaking put your arm around me and gave me a noogie? You fracking weirdo. Also, it is completely ultra-mega ninja creepy that you kept trying to make our legs touch throughout the show. You thought you were being all sly about rubbing it against me, but listen mister, you have a horrible (and might I add fugly) poker face. I seriously wanted to punch you in your bitch tits. Also, your fucking loser friend kept knocking my chair crooked and as I tried to straighten my chair you guffawed, “Good luck trying to straighten anything out at Re-Bar.” That is the worst fucking joke EVER! I hate you; I don’t even know you, and I hate you. I wish I have some crazy scalp disease that is only transmitted from scalp to knuckle contact that’s going to kill you, that’s how much I hate you.
I agree: Anything involving an unwanted head-lock sucks, as does that “joke.” But don’t let that scare you away from this year’s Dina show, which is amazing. Get your tickets here.
(And, for the Dina fan who has everything, may I suggest this Strangercrombie gift pack, featuring Dina Martina singing the cover song of your choice?)
Wow. What was he doing at a drag show if he's so homophobic? The head lock IS kinda strange but whatever buddy, laugh it off. Stay away from my homo friends and leave your phobias at home.
The only "evidence" of "homophobia" is the use of the word "faggot," which I don't take as a slur because, well, I guess I assumed the writer was a faggot, too. (He attends Dina shows, he uses phrases like "ultra mega ninja creepy," and his wish for a vengeful scalp disease is pure camp.)
Gay people can be grossed out by other gay people without it becoming a phobia. So can straight people, especially if the gay person in question is administering random noogies and dumb-ass winky-pun gay jokes..
Yeah, I felt like the guy was a gaydo as well. And if somebody I didn't know noogied me there would have been MAJOR FAGGOT DRAMA.
I was just sayin'...
Knee slapping funny...the tone is very faggoty...I don't think a straight man would mind getting a noogie...I thought they lived for that shit.
I particularly like Anonymous's (correct) use of the semicolon in the middle of his furious rant.
(Conclusive proof of homosexuality, I say.)
And "fracking weirdo". I mean, do you know any straight guys who watch "Battlestar Galactica"? Really.
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