Sex The New and Improved Male Pill?
posted by on November 27 at 16:28 PM
A hormonal contraceptive pill for men is currently being developed right here in spunkphobic Seattle. Most of the discussion around the pill centers on whether or not straight men will take a daily contraceptive pill—a pill that would prevent the production of sperm but not of semen, rendering men sterile for as long as they took it. Most of discussion boils down to this: Can women trust men—even men that don’t want to get anyone pregnant—to the (male) pill?
No, in my opinion, they can’t. And even if some men would take the pill, a woman would have to be a fool to believe a man—particularly a one-night stand—who claimed to be on the pill. Remember, ladies, we’re talking about the same people you can’t trust to keep a condom on during sex.
The reason men won’t take a sterility-inducing contraceptive is this: Straight men like to think of their semen as potent and dangerous. Come is powerful magic, thanks to its ability to knock women up, create life, and create havoc. Straight men—and, yes, some gay men—find their spunk thrilling precisely because they view it as potent, dangerous stuff, creator and destroyer of lives. (Creates babies; destroys lives with deadly STDs.) Men get off on the idea that the post-orgasm contents of that condom, diaphragm, vaginal canal, throat, or anal canal has to be handled with care.
A pill that permanently diminishes the erotic toxicity of spunk? A castration pill? Straight men aren’t gonna take it. Spunk that doesn’t have sperm just isn’t as thrilling, it isn’t as erotically charged. It’s just not spunk.
So I clicked right through the link on Drudge today about a different male contraceptive pill. This new pill, researchers theorize, is one that men would willingly take. Why? Because it doesn’t have to be taken every day, and its effects are temporary.
British scientists have developed a revolutionary pill that men could take as a one-off contraceptive just before a date. The tablet would prevent a man from being able to impregnate a woman, but within a few hours his fertility would return to normal.
Sounds great! Sounds like a pill that more men—not all, but certainly more—would take. And since a woman could observe the guy in the act of swallowing this one-off pill (she could even hand him a pill from her own stash), it would be easier for her to trust-but-verify a one-night stand’s temporary sterility! Everybody wins!
But keep reading the story and you discover that this new male pill…
…contains chemicals that prevent ejaculation. Sexual satisfaction is not affected and the absence of hormones [from the new pill] means that a man’s fertility should return to normal within hours of stopping the treatment.The contraceptive was inspired by the observation that some drugs used to treat schizophrenia and high blood pressure also prevent ejaculation.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but there’s no way in hell that any man on earth is going to take this pill. Moving from a pill that results in spunk-without-sperm to one that results in no-spunk-at-all is not going to be seen by men as some sort of improvement.
Newsflash, researchers: Men like to ejaculate. What’s more, they associate ejaculation—quantity, force, speed, distance—with sexual satisfaction. Additionally, straight men enjoy ejaculating on women as much as they enjoy ejaculating in them. Faces, butts, tits, hair, elbows, foreheads, ears, ankles, knees, toes—you name it, straight guys want to come on it. So even if this new, improved pill allows men to feel as if they’re coming but without actually ejaculating, that empty condom, diaphragm, vaginal canal, throat, or rectum, to say nothing of that splatter-free face, butt, tit, ankle, etc., is going to be seen by all men everywhere as a major buzzkill.
Head back to the lab, British researchers, because your new male pill isn’t going anywhere.
Agreed--how unfortunate.
hahahaha. i don't think of my spooge as being cool because it could get my girlfriend pregnant. I think of it as fucking terrifying and if a pill would safely allow me to put that stress in check i'd take it (so long as it didn't have long term side effects).
I think you underestimate how much men would love not to use condoms. Spunk or no spunk, sperm or no. Naturally that raises STD issues, but so do female contraceptive pills already.
On a psychological level, I think Dan's right.
Now, that doesn't mean that a married couple that intends to eventually have kids couldn't use this - or use it in combination with other female contraception to "give her a break".
But I personally don't recommend trusting guys not to get you preggers. Even if rationally they don't want to, that doesn't mean they'll act rationally.
The pill that prevents ejaculation might be very, very interesting: if it allowed orgasm, and if by retaining seminal fluids it shortened the refractory period, you bet your bippy I'd take it: "Take this pill and get multiple orgasms like your gotta-have-it girlfriend."
Like all men, I love a good spoogefest, but if faced with an insistence by a woman that I take a spooge-inhibiting pill to get some, I would probably acquiesce. Plus I would then *know* contraception is being properly taken, as was sometimes not the case with that ex of mine who occasionally got a little sloppy with taking her BC pills. I mean, I don't want an unplanned pregnancy either.
Dan is absolutely right, of course.
What he doesn't mention, is that women are positively mad with the baby lust, and that any man who doesn't keep track of his used condom is going to get a painful lesson in the power of the turkey baster.
I agree with #5. :)
Also, I think there is a market for a male pill, but I think it's more as a substitute for vasectomy than a substitute for condoms. The fact that anyone gets a vasectomy at all proves that not all men are hung up on the idea that they're "shooting blanks."
Married couples who don't want any (more) children would be the ideal market, especially in cases where the woman either can't take the pill (due to side effects) or where they want the extra margin of safety afforded by using two forms of birth control.
I think the fear that it might not work would kill my erection. I mean, you won't know for sure until it's too late. Not even a drop?
And imagine the woman's reaction to "no, baby, it's OK, I took a pill, I can't ejaculate". "uh, yeah, right, sure you did".
Dan is wrong, Charles is right.
I'll gladly forego whatever feeling of virility I get from having potent spunk if I can also ditch the stress of wondering if I will be adding 18 years of child support payments to tonight's bar tab.
Give me that damn pill now!
Jesus, British researchers on sex? Isn't that a Monty Python movie?
BTW Orv, I think it's the psychological impact of the force, quantity and distance of semen release, not whether or not it actually has sperm within the semen. That's the way I deep down feel about it, but then again I'm not straight so I probably care a lot less about that than guys that might have a chance of getting someone pregnant.
imofftooseethewizard is damn right. Does hours and hours of mad exhausting crazy sex until I can't feel my dick because I just can't come scare me? Hell no! I want to bang all night nonstop baby, give me that pill!
Good lord, I can't imagine not being able to ejaculate. I'm gay, but giving a guy a good facial is just so awesome.
Of course if het guys simply took a gay pill, that would solve that whole pregnancy issue completely.
I would trust a boyfriend to take a pill. But, not a stranger, however I wouldn't be having sex with a stranger without a condom. (Or with a condom, but that's besides the point).
This might be an interesting way to reduce the risk of HIV transmission. I'm thinking M to F through vaginal sex. If the guy doesn't come, it is extremely unlikely that he'd pass HIV on to his woman partner. Right?
bzzzt! sorry 16, but if anything I think that a pill that might allow men who use condoms primarily to avoid pregnancy to stop doing so could actually result in higher STD transmission/contraction rates due to the fact that semen itself is not the only way that these diseases are passed. HPV, basically genital warts, can lead to a higher risk of cervical cancer in women--you can actually contract this virus even with use of a condom, so without would only serve to compound the likelihood of getting it. That's just one basic example--I'm not a doctor or anything, so others can probably speak about this with more authority.
Yeah, I get the part about other STDs. But, I'm wondering specifically about HIV...
Just get a fucking vasectomy already.
As soon as that male pill comes packaged with a vaccine for HIV, HPV, and Herpes, I'll think about it. Until then, my billfold will have more than just money in it.
Be safe, everyone.
I think it's best not to ejaculate, that way my semen can back up and lubricate my internal organs
Yeah, Dan, how come there are so many vasectomies? The first hit I get when I google it says "Nearly 500,000 vasectomies were performed in the United States in 1991..."
That was way back in 1991! Half a million a year.
Another beautiful theory destroyed by an ugly fact. Nice try though.
as long as you only fuck hot, smart, educated women you don't have to worry about the std's too much. It's only when you dip your wick in some dumb, trashy chick that you have to worry about the cock rot.
So the pill will be great for me.
Imagine the surprise on her face when you go for a sneak attack facial, but only phantoms come out.
Vasectomies do not prevent men from ejaculating.
that was fucking offensive. you could make the same stupid argument about women not wanting to take a contraceptive pill because they're afraid of feeling barren and losing the magic of femininity. all men care about is spooging on a girl's face? not even a retarded high school football player would say something that inane.
Savage is clueless. The market for chemical contraceptives for men is married couples. Researchers have done their homework.
Exact quote from a married man: "Um, I think I'll wait until it's been out for a few years and side effects are known."
Who knows, the side effects could be good, not just bad...like The Pill and the bonus of no menstrual cramps. What would the equivalent bonus for men be? Maybe it will cure baldness.
A smart woman has known for a while- don't trust a dude; "You have the rubber?" Now a smart man will know- you are on the pill?" Contraception is now more a personal choice then ever- no one can make you into a parent.
Married men who'd rather not get vasectomies will take the pill. Men in LTR relationships with women who can't take hormonal birth control will take the pill. Men who are extremely paranoid about paying child support will take the pill. Some couples will have both people taking a pill, to double up for extra security.
Of course some men won't take it. There are also plenty of women who won't or can't take hormonal birth control. That doesn't mean there's no market for it.
You know what I don't see a market for? A female condom. Seriously, WTF? Talk about awkward and ungainly. Yet it's out there. Also? The IUD. Good hell, talk about a contraceptive that got some bad press a few decades back. And yet I know people who have it and think it's the best thing ever.
"Women uh... women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I, uh... I do not avoid women, Mandrake."
"No"
"But I... I do deny them my essence."
A male contraceptive that knocks out one or six of the hundred-some novel proteins surrounding the sperm cell would sell far better then a hormonal-function pill because a creative pharm could market it as a non-hormonal affect. Viral and bacterial infection rates would increase, but that would be very small beans compared to the vast economic benefit an easy use/daily use pill would bring. Namely, the vast market for such a product would generate billions for one company in the first seven years until it becomes generic, then it would generate billions for many companies after that.
Of course women shouldn't trust men. Men shouldn't trust women either.
Thats a fact of life today. But, any chance we have to stop ooops babies from taking over the planet should be taken. Economically and environmentally, this pill makes great sense, and if they can't make it with out toying with hormones, then they just need better marketing.
The only reason most men think spraying on a chick is hot is because that's how it's done in the pornos. I come on you, I am like porn star!
The main reason I think it's hot is because it means I'm having sex, but I'd much prefer using a condom or getting swallowed and not deal with the cleanup.
If I could take a pill that let me come without the mess, that's freakin' cool, but I wouldn't trust it for a single stroke as birth control...not to mention STD prevention.
Comments Closed
In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).