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Friday, October 20, 2006

On Pregnant Sex

posted by on October 20 at 13:54 PM

One of the big holes in the culture of this society is on the matter of sex and pregnancy. Meaning, we have answers for things like drinking and driving (the answer is no), for public sneezing (cover your mouth), clearing a clogged nose (must be done with a disposable tissue—the other day in Chinatown I saw an old Chinese man shut one his nostrils with a finger and blow the mucus in the open nostril out onto the street, in middle of the afternoon, in public, and he did it as if this was an OK thing to do in American society, which, of course, is not the case).

But when it comes down to the question of sex with a fully pregnant woman, there is silence. What should a couple do in this situation? Is it right? Is it wrong? And if a woman’s pregnancy is far along the way, having sex with her must mean having sex with the baby. Is this acceptable? Here is my personal answer: Sex with a pregnant women is not right or wrong but dishonest. It’s an act that is close to pity. One does it because one is trying to be nice, and not being honest about how much their partner’s body has changed.

The body that had the sex that resulted in the pregnancy is not the same as the body that is in the process of producing a whole new life. The first body was attractive (like a flower is attractive); the pregnant body, on the other hand, is used up by the function of the pregnancy. What a woman loses in the long process of a pregnancy is precisely what made the pregnancy possible, the flower of her body.

RSS icon Comments


Uh, this is a troll, right?

Posted by Mark | October 20, 2006 2:02 PM

Farmers blow their nose like the old Chinese man all the time. It's considered perfectly acceptable. Try not to be so world class in your thinking.

Posted by World Class | October 20, 2006 2:02 PM

crazy talk, brother, crazy talk.

Posted by oye como va | October 20, 2006 2:03 PM

so men can't cry, and pregnant women are used up by the function of pregnancy.....oh sweet jesus, please never let me date a man like Charles, who I suspect is deeply, deeply wounded.

Posted by el ganador | October 20, 2006 2:04 PM

Seriously Charles, do you just go looking for hostility directed your way? Can't we all just enjoy our Friday afternoon without you bringing up the "pity" sex pregnant women deserve for their loss of their bodies?

I usually feel bad when the comment threads rip your opinons, but please... shut up.

ps - Sorry you were offended by what appears to be an immigrant, since that is perfectly acceptable in many parts of China.

Posted by brie | October 20, 2006 2:06 PM

What the hell, Charles? I'm pregnant, and still having sex with both my husband AND my boyfriend. And we sure as hell aren't going to stop.

For one thing, the cervix creates a huge plug at the end of the vagina so fewer baddies can get in there during the pregnancy. The penis and the baby have no interaction whatsoever. (Not that the penis ever gets inside the uterus anyway... unless the guy is super long AND the girl enjoys getting her cervix split. It hurts like a fucker, for the record.)

For another thing, pregnant women aren't horribly unattractive. You might find the random stranger on the street a bit tubby for your taste, but a man who loves a woman presumably still loves her when she's pregnant.

PLUS orgasms for women exercise the vaginal muscles, making them stronger for the whole birthing process... And they're a lot more fun than kegels.

Obstetricians across the board agree that sex during pregnancy is a-o-k right up until the water breaks during labor, and then just 'cause you don't want to get semen in there that could possibly cause infection. Unless it's a very high-risk pregnancy where bed rest is necessary, sex during pregnancy is FUCKIN' GREAT.

Bizarre post, Charles.

Posted by L | October 20, 2006 2:09 PM

Yeah, no kidding. This is so over-the-top that it almost seems like it *has* to be a joke... if it is, I say, well played, Mr. Mudede, well played.

*narrows eyes*

Posted by Horace | October 20, 2006 2:18 PM

"What a woman loses in the long process of a pregnancy is precisely what made the pregnancy possible, the flower of her body."

WTF?!?! You are kidding, right?

Posted by co-worker | October 20, 2006 2:19 PM

What the fuck?

Charles...I think you need to join this pregnant man for a "time out" to think about the pros and cons of making misogynistic statements in public.

Posted by darryl | October 20, 2006 2:19 PM

Word, L. A pregnant woman is not necessarily an unattractive woman. For some men, the spherical bulge of a pregnant belly is nothing short of voluptuous.

Posted by niche | October 20, 2006 2:20 PM

I hope no one ever shows you pity enough to have sex with you ever again. You don't deserve to be anywhere near the "flower of a woman's body." I'm disgusted by the thought of any woman taking interest in you.

Posted by Renee | October 20, 2006 2:28 PM

You've outdone yourself, man. If I didn't know any better I'd say that "Charles Mudede" was a satirical, fictional character, like A. Birch Steen. Please stop embarrassing yourself and enraging the rest of us.

Posted by Levislade | October 20, 2006 2:41 PM

I used to be annoyed that the RSS feed didn't include author attribution. Then I realized I could reliably tell who wrote Slog articles by plotting them in (crazy,wank) space. I'm glad you're jealously defending your rights to (1.0,1.0), Charles. It makes my life that much simpler.

Posted by gfish | October 20, 2006 2:43 PM

@GFish - Hilarious.

Man, Charles, that must've been a bad sandwich.

Posted by Gabriel | October 20, 2006 2:57 PM

Oh, and pregnant women are very sexy.

Posted by Gabriel | October 20, 2006 3:00 PM

Please someone give Charles a news story to do or something. His comments are starting to come off as Guy-Talking-To-Himself-At-The-Bus-Stop.

Posted by please | October 20, 2006 3:03 PM

I'm tempted to think that Charles just comes up with crazy shit to try to get a lot of hits, but I'm less and less inclined to believe that. I'm really curious how his schtick or whatever it is goes over in The Stranger newsroom.

Posted by Gabriel | October 20, 2006 3:05 PM

Thank god us gays don't have to worry about this garbage.

Posted by Investigatory Journalist | October 20, 2006 3:09 PM

In a way, Charles is the result of an interesting experiment: what happens to the mind when you spend all your time reading Marx, Neitzsche, and police blotters while moonlighting by writing a movie about horse-fucking while apparently being drunk throughout.

Posted by Gabriel | October 20, 2006 3:09 PM

I think mudede is just trying to flirt with erica.

Posted by charles | October 20, 2006 3:18 PM

I suppose this also applies to a man with a gut?

Posted by Paulus | October 20, 2006 3:34 PM

C'mon guys, Charles is a paid troll.

Don't feed the troll. It's your attention that sustains it.

Posted by chris | October 20, 2006 3:34 PM

Lol. Obviously none of you are Charles's type.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | October 20, 2006 3:36 PM

It's fine to have sexual intercourse with a pregnant woman provided you do it in silence and intend to dine on the afterbirth.

Posted by Tom | October 20, 2006 3:37 PM

I think this new policy of paying Charles according to how many comments he can accrue on his Slog posts is not working out.

Posted by Fnarf | October 20, 2006 3:42 PM

What. The. Fuck?

This is just so... Damn. Just wow. And not in the good way.

Posted by Roscha | October 20, 2006 3:48 PM

when we started the slog, i was encouraged by my coworkers to post the sort of things that i talk about in the office (where i spend much of my life). this is all that i'm doing. i simply write about things that are on my mind or have just discovered. if it provokes comments, that's fine, but that wasn't the intention. the intention, the impulse was to put into words an idea and to see where it goes.

and, dan, there is nothing uglier than a beer belly.

Posted by charles mudede | October 20, 2006 3:59 PM

So do you want to just "see where it goes" in your own head, or actually respond to the comments? I said a hell of a lot more than just "you're a freak for thinking that."

Presumably, when you talk about stuff in the office, you respond to other people's comments. If the slog is similar, you should be prepared to respond to OUR comments when you post something so inflamatory.

Posted by L | October 20, 2006 4:08 PM

If pregnant women are so unattractive, how come there's so much porn that surrounds it?

Posted by Gitai | October 20, 2006 4:10 PM

Normally, Charles, I have no problem with your 'observations'; they lend a nice surrealist veneer to my day. But in this case (and, looking back, in previous cases as well) you're making generalizations based on no more than your own personal preferences; the words are going places, but the places are a little ridiculous. It's on the same level as the people who reason 'I think buttsex is icky, therefore it must be inherently, morally wrong' and 'women have bits that you can insert things into, therefore women must be hollow, empty energy-sucking voids'. What you're selling as truths are only truths in the land of Charles Mudede.

Posted by Ursula | October 20, 2006 4:19 PM

Don't knock it until you've tried it!

Posted by Suz | October 20, 2006 4:32 PM

i really like the idea of a woman's flower of a body being used up as a result of pregnancy. she does inherently lose the attractive body that produced the pregnancy in the first place. however, she does gain something during this process, and that is the psychological relief of knowing that the 'damage has been done.' i've heard that for many pregnant women, the act of sex becomes far more enjoyable during pregnancy for exactly this reason. If getting knocked up allows a woman the comfort she needs to fully explore her sexuality, i'm all for it. as long as her partner is down. personally, i think pregnant women are pretty gross. i've never bought the whole "glow" thing. (i am a woman by the way.)

Posted by ray | October 20, 2006 4:41 PM

So The Stranger will spend many valuable column inches and hours of columnist/reporter time on trying to get Buju Banton ridden out of town on a rail for 15 year old song lyrics, but encourages blatant misogynistic musings from their own staff.

Charles thinks women that are preggers are ugly, and needed to pretty up his language to try to make his opinion sound like a universal truth.


Posted by NaFun | October 20, 2006 4:46 PM

The rules are very simple on this matter: If the child is yours, then not only is pregnant sex acceptable, it is partly your duty to give that woman what she deserves - great sex. She's got a lot going on, you could probably both use it. You don't like it? Too bad. Suck it up, your starting a family.

If the child is not yours, than I personally consider it slightly tacky. Call me old fashioned.

Posted by Dougsf | October 20, 2006 4:52 PM

props Ray @32. someone has a different ride besides this bandwagon.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | October 20, 2006 4:58 PM

the comment by ray and doug sf made my post worth it.

as for gabriel, you made me laugh like there's no tomorrow. and if i have any goal in life it is to make my readers laugh like there's no tomorrow.

Posted by charles mudede | October 20, 2006 5:08 PM

Fuck her hard so both her and the baby knows who's daddy.

Posted by Giffy | October 20, 2006 5:12 PM

Confidential to Angela: You may want to rethink your stance on third world men.

Posted by PumpingMyFurryFist | October 20, 2006 5:32 PM

I completely disagree with Charles on this (and in my own experience, my wife was totally hot throughout her pregnancy). But the tone of some of the commenters, oy vay. Do you have to dehumanize everybody who occasionally expresses a thought you don't agree with? What a bunch of totalitarians. Sheesh.

Posted by Stefan Sharkansky | October 20, 2006 5:50 PM

flower of her body?!? are you trying to sell us maxi pads or something? in 1979?

c'mon, everyone. being pregnant sucks. the least you can do for a knocked up lady is give her a nice schtupping once in a while.

and if the alternative is not schtupping, it doen't seem so bad.

Posted by gforce | October 20, 2006 8:33 PM

#33: Thinking pregnant women are not attractive is not misogynistic. It's an aesthetic opinion.

Posted by Bert | October 20, 2006 10:36 PM

Uh-oh, looks like the dehumanizing blogosphere has given Stefan the vapors. Better have a lie-down. If Charles were unable to take a little teasing, he wouldn't post such provocative items. He obviously took the ribbing in good humor.

Anyway, none of the commenters were trying to convince Charles to change his opinion on the matter. It's just silly that he posts his opinions as universal truths ("it's wrong for boys to cry", "sex with a pregnant woman is dishonest because she is objectively unattractive").

Posted by Gabriel | October 21, 2006 6:47 AM

Charles, what the fuck? Normally, I'd back you up on anything, but I think you should explain your position a little better. A pregnant woman is beautiful, Charles. Haven't you seen that healthy glow?

Posted by Dobbs | October 21, 2006 10:24 AM

Charles, I'm sorry I was so rude to you earlier on. I think I understand your point a little better now.

Posted by Dobbs | October 21, 2006 10:29 AM

So you compare having sex with a woman to drinking and driving and sneezing on somebody or blowing snot out of your nose. I know you said a "pregnant woman" but women are women, pregnant or not, they do not change into something alien, disgusting or "taboo". Only in the minds of some men that seem to think of women as some possession that has to look a certain way to be acceptable in "the culture of this society" do they all of a sudden become disgusting when pregnant.
If anything reading your posts are entertaining, in a creepy way, like watching crazed TV evangelists, Bush talking or Michael Jackson pulling a stunt for attention.

Posted by brian | October 21, 2006 11:01 AM

We live in a society that romanticizes the idea of having and raising children. So it's no surprise when you hear people talk about how attractive pregnant women are or how they "glow." These are romantic notions and ideals that only a wealthy society can muster.

Posted by Tim | October 21, 2006 11:21 AM

hmmm ... paragraphs 1 & 2: the kinds of things I expect & enjoy reading from CM, and enjoy reading comments from folks that get all fired up about his opinions. Paragraph 3 tho ... wtf? How can a guy fall from coming up with all those great philosophy-tinged flights on buildings etc. to this misogynistic crap? I can't take that last bit with the good humor I usually bring to most of your excellent writing (however little I agree with some of it), Charles. Makes me want to re-consider that CM fanclub membership. tear.

Posted by Whomsoever | October 21, 2006 12:20 PM

Um, I absolutely disagree with this "point" of Mudede's, also:

"and, dan, there is nothing uglier than a beer belly."

There are plenty of us out in the world who think there's nothing lovelier.

To each his or her own.

Posted by Doctiloquus | October 21, 2006 6:34 PM

This has to be one of the dumbest things I have ever read, anywhere.

You've never had sex with a pregnant woman, have you, Charles?

Posted by MJOS | October 21, 2006 8:17 PM

I hope Im not clinging to the old life by posting here, but I had to look, and I cant believe I agree with something Steven Sharkansky said! But seriously, pregnant women are hot. Just sayin.

Posted by Grant Cogswell | October 21, 2006 11:50 PM

pregant women are the sexiest biengs on the face of the earth! Sex with a pregant woman is extremely erotic. They are in a more sensitive state, and because their bodies are being prepared for childbirth, they feel like hot, liquid silk during intercours. Being the father of 5 pregnancies, I had sex with my wife eveyday of her pregnancy, (many times two or three times a day) and upto and including sex, in everycase, on the day her water broke. My wife had healthy, normal child births and my children were all normal healthy kids. But the really important issue here is not wheather or not you find pregnant women a turn-on, (I'd pick a pregnant woman over a superstar model anyday) but that the woman does not feel unwanted, unattractive, or fat and ugly. Making love to her with feelings and enthusiasm will do more to make her feel good than any other thing you or anyone else can do for her and the well being of her unborn child.

Posted by RichG | October 22, 2006 8:23 AM

"when it comes down to the question of sex with a fully pregnant woman"

LOL! What if you're only half pregnant?

Posted by Gill | October 22, 2006 8:24 AM

For the uninfiormed - yes, mam, they sure do glow.

Hormones are surging, skin tones are excellent and colored beyond normal.

Have been married once -- to a sexy woman, she was an abolute sex machine during preganscey - never better for either of us ..... no rubbers either.

And indeed, sublime beauty, the all knowing secret thing. About to unfold.

Loved it. Both of us did.

Charles you have a screw loose, you sound like Elle magazine sometimes.

Men don't cry.
Surely you were not at my grannies funeral.

Or in the room where I was as a child when Dr. King was murnered.

Get some better weed Charles, the current stuff is making you cranky and morass.

Posted by Jacka | October 22, 2006 2:37 PM

I sneeze into a handkerchif, and then wash it because it's better for the environment.

Posted by Carl Ballard | October 22, 2006 3:31 PM

It is a very northwest ego that thinks its snot will pollute the world.

Congrats Carl.

For the too prim to understand the mechanics of a good snot blow, it is great.... clears the passages and links to the universe with a head rush.

Feeling a bit of energy, lean forward, turn the head slightly, hold one narine with thumb, blow very hard with a little shake ------all on the ground ------- then repeat the other side.

Every working class guy is supposed to learn this as a kid. Too many prissy midwest homos on this slog.

Not you Carl, you are a hottie. Even if you are not a butch snotter.

Dan is the most femmie snotter in the world. Worse than his lady boy snotter partner.

Posted by Jack | October 22, 2006 9:23 PM

I didn't feel very attractive during my pregnancy, but my husband didn't seem to mind, and I noticed I got some weird attention from people who hadn't seemed to notice me much when my "flower" was skinny and unpregnant. Some guys like it...

Posted by Janet | October 22, 2006 10:05 PM

Personally, I think a pregnant man would be very hot. I think we should work on that. We can start by having Charles give birth to the cranium currently impacted in his rectal cavity.

Posted by Geni | October 23, 2006 1:44 PM

My problem with Mudede's post is not that it's misogynist, it's that he poses a question and then answers a different one.

He initially asks, "And if a woman’s pregnancy is far along the way, having sex with her must mean having sex with the baby. Is this acceptable?"

But then he never answers whether it is acceptable to "have sex with the baby," only whether it is gross to have sex with a lady who has "lost the flower of her body."

That leaves the initial question unanswered. Additionally, the question he chooses to answer leaves me with more questions: Is it dishonest to have sex with a barren woman if she's still hot? What if a lady is round but has no bun in the oven? Is a perimenopausal woman still considered to have her flower? Are women still attractive after menopause? Lastly, is it dishonest for a woman to have sex with a man if he has to use viagra?

Posted by Diana | October 23, 2006 1:55 PM

My wife was hot when she was pregnant and wanted to fuck all the time up until about 2 weeks before our son was born. It was great. No worries about protectioln or any of that shit. I helped make him in the first place, and after your kids are born you have to fuck in bed next to them all the time if you ever want to get laid. Take a ride on the RTD, Mudede, or get yourself a butt baby and see if your girlfriend pities your sphincter. I certainly would.

Posted by Glenn | October 23, 2006 2:29 PM

My wife was hot when she was pregnant and wanted to fuck all the time up until about 2 weeks before our son was born. It was great. No worries about protectioln or any of that shit. I helped make him in the first place, and after your kids are born you have to fuck in bed next to them all the time if you ever want to get laid. Take a ride on the RTD, Mudede, or get yourself a butt baby and see if your girlfriend pities your sphincter. I certainly would.

Posted by Glenn | October 23, 2006 2:29 PM

Kill your faggot self.

Posted by Jim | October 24, 2006 4:58 PM

And if a woman’s pregnancy is far along the way, having sex with her must mean having sex with the baby.

Only if it's crowning.

Posted by Auguste | October 25, 2006 10:03 AM

Dood are you serious? Tell me this is a joke. To quote Ann Douglas on WebMD:

"Sex during pregnancy can be a wonderful experience and can help bring a couple even closer together as they make the journey towards parenthood together, but it often requires creativity, imagination, and patience, as you're about to discover for yourself. Good luck."

... and last I checked plenty of couple have sex during pregnancy. I seriously doubt that it has anything to do with "pity". From what I hear some guys actually think women are sexier pregnant. Other women certainly seem to think women are sexier when they are pregnant.

Me? I'm not at all opposed to pregger sex but I could see how it could cause some logistical headaches for anyone who is into a lot of contortion. Once that center of gravity changes I would expect the wheelbarrow position to be a little more difficult to maintain. :)

Posted by Vin | October 25, 2006 2:11 PM

You people are all intolerant kvetchy bitches. All charles was saying is that it's impolite, if you're drunk and fucking a Chinese farmer, to blow snot out the window of a moving car onto a pregnant woman. Why can't we have anything good? Why can't we have anything good?

Posted by wrongshore | October 25, 2006 5:13 PM

At the risk of stating the obvious, it’s clear to me that one of the big holes in the culture of this society is Charles Mudede.

Posted by Nancy in NYC | October 25, 2006 8:05 PM

Okay. Obviously Charles would not want to have sex with a pregnant woman. But his misconceptions are pretty funny. Since the baby is enclosed in an amniotic sac, and is floating, it's highly unlikely that you're getting anywhere near the baby when you're fucking.

And, as someone who has given birth to two children, I can attest to the fact that while I was pregnant, I was constantly sexually aroused. (Okay. When I had morning sickness, maybe not so much.) But sex during pregnancy is fantastic, or it was for me.

Also, if you are close to your due date and you're trying to start labor, sex worked for me. There are prostoglandins in semen, which ripen the cervix, AND the contractions of the orgasm can sometimes set off labor contractions. (This may be news to you since perhaps you haven't experienced being with a woman who is having an orgasm.)

But to each his own. You don't want to fuck a pregnant woman? No problem. I'm sure, if you ever find yourself in the position of having helped conceive a child, your partner may be only too happy to find someone who will fuck her.

Posted by Enya | October 27, 2006 11:11 AM

Taliban go home!

I’ve always heard that opinions are like armpits. Everyone has more than one, and sometimes they stink! Your opinion clearly exposes your third-world mentality where it comes to women. No doubt you spend a considerable amount of time masturbating to porn due to the fact that few, if any, women would want to be defiled by your filth. When one spends as much time looking at color pictures of places they’ll never be as you apparently do, it’s clear that you probably had a weak and emasculated father figure (if any at all) and a fat and domineering mother who instilled in you a perverted picture of the true beauty of woman in general.

By the way, its possible that the Chinese guy who blew his nose onto the street in public is just as uncouth and classless as you portray yourself.

Gee, this sharing of opinions is fun, even if it is vicious and not asked for.

Charlie Kilo

Posted by Charlie Kilo | November 3, 2006 9:54 AM

Another perspective for you Taliban boy.

A pregnant woman doesn’t exactly conjure up images of wild frenzied sexual abandon. One is more likely to visualize the pregnant woman abstaining out of fear or disinterest. But thankfully pregnant sex isn’t an infrequent occurrence. In fact it can actually be the best sex you’ll have in your life. And although you may encounter some obstacles along the way, you may never be hornier than when you’re pregnant.

“Ninety percent of my pregnancy consisted of orgasmic dreams”, says Lori Butler, 34, who recently delivered twin girls. “I woke up wet almost every morning, I had dirty, dreams where I had sex with men, women, objects, pretty much anything and everything – it was absolutely wonderful.”

The first thing about pregnant sex (after grabbing a good lube to take care of the dryness issue) was that even though the hormonal changes of early pregnancy depleted my body’s moisture, my blood made up for it by pumping full speed ahead into all the arousing places.

You just haven’t had sex until you do it with an engorged, ultra sensitive vulva. It’s fantastic, and ladies, this only happens to your body when you’re pregnant.

Even after the orgasm, there’s a long lasting sense of reverberation, a continued, almost painful tingle that may drive some mad, others insane with pleasure.

“I wanted it all the time, way more often than usual, because it was just way better,” says Rhyann Cheung, 34, who had her first baby in July. She smiles wistfully as she recalls how often her and her husband Behan, had sex when she was pregnant. “I was definitely turned on a lot more often than usual,” she adds.

And engorged genitals aren’t just fun for the pregnant woman, but the men will be loving’ it too – when a woman’s genitalia are primed like this, men get a pleasantly snugger fit during penetration than pre-pregnancy.

“My wife being pregnant was a major aphrodisiac,” says Butler’s husband, Matt Butler, 35. “Because the body is changing you are more inventive with positions than usual and that’s pretty fun.”

I say enjoy it while you can. These magic pregnancy hormones don’t last forever and after the arrival of the baby sex usually becomes an entirely different story.

I’m not saying that pregnant sex is the same for everyone. We all vary in our sexual appetites and responses. What is true for some may not be the case for everyone, but according to What to Expect When You’re Expecting, by Eisenberg, Murk off, and Hathaway, most women do report an increase in their sex drive when pregnant, particularly during their second trimester. These same women do start to lose their interest closer to the end of the pregnancy when their minds become preoccupied with the overly large bodies and impending arrival of the baby.

Making love during pregnancy was different than any other time in my life. It discredited the myth that having sex while pregnant is taboo to do. It helped ease my personal fears I had about doing it when pregnant, while at the same time paving the way for a type of sexual gratification that can only happen under these special circumstances.

One thing that makes sex so good when you’re pregnant is that you’re totally free; after all you don’t have to worry about getting knocked up. For me this was liberating like nothing else. When you’re pregnant already, the unconscious stress that lives in you is freed and you can be crazy like you’ve never been before.

“When you’re pregnant, you’re having the most fun sex of all because you’re not doing it to get pregnant or anything. It’s selfish sex and it’s hot,” says Lisa Jackson, 31, a mom who is currently pregnant with her second child. “You just don’t have to worry about anything,” she says with a matter of fact tone.

So combine raging hormones, a plumped up labia and wanton sexual inhibition and you’ve got a great recipe for sex. If that’s not enough there’s always the perineum massage. I heard about this in one of my childbirth classes and I had to ask our childbirth instructor to repeat herself, as the information was so enthralling.

“Listen up ladies,” she shouted. “One of the best perks of pregnancy is the perineum massage - you should have your partner do this for you at least a few times a week to help lessen the risk of ripping during childbirth.”

This region, called the perineum, lies between the vagina and the rectum and is an area of great concern amongst most pregnant women, mainly because this is the part of the body we’re asking a lot of during childbirth. When I was pregnant I stressed out a lot over this area because I really didn’t like the idea of my perineum ripping apart.

Massage is the number one method suggested to avoid the ripping or slicing of this oh so sensitive area of flesh. A woman could always try doing it herself, but it’s much more fun if she has her partner take care of it. The massage should incorporate liberal amounts of lube or lotion and last at least 30 minutes, focusing on the perineum and the surrounding area, rubbing in a clockwise motion.

The goal is to loosen up the muscle, allowing it to stretch during childbirth and ensure a smooth delivery. Even if the method doesn’t pull through and you end up ripping (as many do), at least a lot of fun throughout the pregnancy was had by all.

So sex isn’t something you should avoid while pregnant. It shouldn’t be scary and it isn’t abnormal. So if you like sex and at some point think you may want to have a family, hopefully you’ll recall these words of experience when the urine test turns positive

Posted by Charlie Kilo | November 3, 2006 10:02 AM

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