Yesterday you said to my very face that I looked hot in my dark clothes. And I, after a quick look in my handy bag of colonial expressions, told you that a gentleman knows no weather. But this morning, I decided to lighten up a bit and wear something that’s in tune with the spring that has suddenly fallen upon us. As you can see in this image, I’m wearing a shirt whose blue is much lighter than the blue of the shirt I wore yesterday.

Now, Madrid, let’s turn the table. After you pointed out my flaw, I pointed out yours: Last Friday I caught sight of you eating while walking up Pike. A lady must never do such a thing—walking and eating at the same time. It is very unbecoming, even for a man. As I have made the effort to adjust my look, I hope you make the effort to undo your uncouth habit.