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Tuesday, January 24, 2006

The art of being Donald

Posted by on January 24 at 9:48 AM

Reuters reports that yesterday Donald Trump filed a lawsuit against New York Times reporter Timothy O’Brien and Warner Books for allegedly falsely pegging Trump as a millionaire, instead of a billionaire, in his recent book TrumpNation: The Art of Being the Donald.

“I believe it is important to expose irresponsible, malicious and false reporting,” Trump said in a statement.

And so he is suing O’Brien and Warner for defamatory statements, to the tune of Five Billion Dollars ($5,000,000,000).

After he is compensated for his inevitable court victory, Trump plans on buying the moon, and then chiseling his real net worth on its surface, along with this image (beware, image contains an artistic rendering of Donald Trump’s wang. Don’t view at work, if you value respectability). That’ll show those motherfuckers who’s rich.

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WOAH! It's WAY too early in the day to see that picture. No, scratch that. It's always too eary for that shit.

It's apparently also too eary to spell early right.

Uh, how much money is $5,000,000 again?

Uh Cienna, you're missing a few zeroes in your billion there.

goddammit goddammit. I was thinking "five million". I hope trump doesn't get word of this...

If he does hear about this, lets hope he forgets a lot of zeros, when he is suing you for not giving accurate information.

Thanks for marking that one NOT safe for work. Guess I won't read this during the day - think about it, please.

Gotta agree with Mike. Cienna, love the posts - hilarious even. However, seeing as a good portion of your daytime readership is just slacking off from work (including me) a little NSFW heads-up would prevent me ever again having to explain to my boss why I'm looking at an illustration of a buff, aroused Donald Trump *shudder*.

Sorry about that. Consider it fixed...

Donald Trump's net worth is a negative number. He owes more money on his Atlantic City casinos than most countries have ever seen. Remember the old saying: if you owe the bank a hundred grand and can't pay, you have a problem; if you owe the bank a hundred million and can't pay, the bank has a problem. Trump is a brand name being kept afloat as an entertainment commodity to cover the fact that he's a worthless piece of shit in more ways than just metaphysical.

FNARF999 is absolutely right. The Donald has less net worth than I do, and believe me I don't have much. Trump runs a business empire that is leverage beyond it's break up value. Just check out the value of shares in Trump Casino and Resorts. Hint: you won't find it traded on the NYSE or NASDAQ. It's a penny stock. The Donald is a master showman, and is amazingly successful at getting suckers to continually loan him more money. But you've got to hand it to him, he has one bitchin comb over.

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