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Thursday, May 29, 2008

Another Hot Tip For the Ages

posted by on May 29 at 12:46 PM

I know I have an especially affecting Last Days Hot Tip when the Stranger copy editors hunt me down and berate me for torturing them.

They did just that after reading Friday’s item in this week’s column.

FRIDAY, MAY 23 Today brings a valuable lesson from Hot Tipper Caroline: “I was browsing for jeans yesterday in the Capitol Hill Value Village. I found a cute pair, but they didn’t have a price tag on them, so I thought I’d try them on and if they fit then I’d ask someone for the price. I draped the jeans over my arm and continued going through the racks. While browsing, I smelled the distinct odor of pussy. Then it got stronger and became the distinct odor of pussy and piss. I looked at the jeans draped on my arm and, hating myself, leaned in slightly to see if the offensive odor was coming from them. It was. I hurried to get the jeans off my arm, only to realize they were soaking wet from the crotch through the thigh with still-warm urine. Obviously, someone had wet their goddamn pants, gone into Value Village, put on a different pair of jeans, and hung their piss-soaked jeans back on the rack. It’s been almost 24 hours and I still have a grimace on my face. What continues to haunt me is that, in total shock and horror, I put the jeans back on the rack. Ladies, beware.”

Caroline: My thanks.
Copy editors: My apologies.

RSS icon Comments

1

This wouldn't happen at Barneys. The romance of poverty only goes so far, as this story proves.

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 29, 2008 12:49 PM
2

This happens EVERY DAY at Barneys.

Posted by David Schmader | May 29, 2008 12:54 PM
3

What do I smell? The bleach I just poured in my eyes after reading that. Thank you David!

Posted by StangerDanger | May 29, 2008 12:55 PM
4

Okay, gross.
And why the heck would you hang them back up? At least drop them on the floor so a person-who-works-there type person would pick them up and discover the incident on their own...but sheesh, I'd tell the store in a heartbeat.

Posted by j4zz3rgrl | May 29, 2008 12:58 PM
5

The odor of pussy indicates that the wearer either has issues with doing her laundry, or with hygiene, or both. It's then not so surprising that such a person would wet her pants.

Posted by keshmeshi | May 29, 2008 12:58 PM
6

In some circles, that would make those jeans more expensive. No word if panties were included?

Posted by Banna | May 29, 2008 1:00 PM
7

after i complained to her that the men's restroom at crystal mtn. always smells like a giant turd, my daughter told me that the women's restroom at smells like "vag".

this is worse.

Posted by max solomon | May 29, 2008 1:01 PM
8
Obviously, someone had wet their goddamn pants, gone into Value Village, put on a different pair of jeans, and hung their piss-soaked jeans back on the rack.

Or maybe they wet their pants in Value Village. I always have to pee in there.

Posted by w7ngman | May 29, 2008 1:21 PM
9

You bastard. I was eating a cookie when I read that. Eating cookie! Blagh!

Posted by blank12357 | May 29, 2008 1:35 PM
10

True story - my ex gf from a few years ago told me that when she was in high school, she and her best friend used to go to stores and try out zany/weird/ugly outfits and crack each other up and occasionally, she'd laugh so hard that she'd pee herself.

"So you'd just take the outfit off and put it back on the rack????"
"um..yeah"

Posted by joe | May 29, 2008 1:39 PM
11

Okay, I just wanted to chime in to say that nearly the exact same thing happened to me in 1998 at a Tacoma Value Village (the one by Mega Foods) except somebody had obviously shit their pants and done the same emergency switcheroo. If it doesn't have a price tag on it, there's just too much you don't know. You must move on.

Posted by brad | May 29, 2008 1:45 PM
12

WASHINGTON -- The number of Army suicides increased again last year, amid the most violent year yet in both the Iraq and Afghanistan wars. An Army official said Thursday that 115 troops committed suicide in 2007, a nearly 13 percent increase over the previous year's 102. The official spoke on condition of anonymity because a full report on the deaths wasn't being released until later Thursday.

Posted by I see your boobie | May 29, 2008 1:59 PM
13

Call me a naive gay man, but does the smell of pussy having just hung out in a pair of pants normally overpower the smell of wet urine still in them?

I'm suddenly nostalgic for life as it was before I read this story.

Posted by DJSauvage | May 29, 2008 1:59 PM
14

I had a human shit incident at the Value Village on Capitol Hill. It was on the bottom level, down by where they keep all those dirty toys and bedding. My friend stepped in it, and proceeded to track it all over the place. I smelled it, and started gagging -- I think it was pretty fresh. I have not been back to that Value Village since that time.

Posted by dreamboatcaptain | May 29, 2008 2:04 PM
15

Straight men can smell pussy across a continent. Apparently this woman can smell it across an incontinent.


(What do I win for that one?)

Posted by Sir Vic | May 29, 2008 2:06 PM
16

The one question I'm left with after reading this: in what way does this story make a copy editor's job difficult?

Posted by Smarmy Macaroon | May 29, 2008 2:21 PM
17

But um.... how do you determine that a pair of pants is cute enough to want to try on and not notice the soaking wet stain in the crotch and legs?

Were the belt loops just out of this world?

Posted by K | May 29, 2008 2:28 PM
18

@16 Remember how you felt after reading it? Yeah- they did too.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | May 29, 2008 2:28 PM
19

"Prices so LOOOOOOW, they'll make you wet yourself!"

Posted by COMTE | May 29, 2008 3:22 PM
20

K @17--the jeans were dark, dark blue. You really couldn't see how wet they were. You had to be unfortunate enough to smell and horrifyingly, feel. I'm still grimacing, a week later. I'll never be the same.

Posted by caroline | May 29, 2008 3:24 PM
21

Chuck Berry is on his way from St. Louis as fast as his Lincoln will take him!

Posted by CP | May 29, 2008 4:52 PM
22

@15, my most sincere admiration.

Posted by Spoogie | May 29, 2008 5:03 PM
23

Still warm? I'll bet the offender was still there, watching you and getting off on it.

Posted by Fnarf | May 29, 2008 6:47 PM

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