Character Study Montana on Second and Bell
posted by on March 24 at 9:45 AM
Holy shi** is that the ferret guy? It’s a opossum! Hey excuse me…
I have raised all sorts of animals, my pops gave me a bear cub when I was real young back in Montana; we got into all sorts of trouble! One time we got into it inside the bar—don’t ever take a beer away from a bear! The bartender learned that one the hard way.
Where did you get this guy?
It’s a she, and I rescued her about two years ago. She has been with me ever since. They are very loyal to just one person. Never ran away or nothin’.
She ever bitten you? Those teeth are sharp and gnarly!
Oh no, opossums would never bite a human; they will play dead before they bite you. Just like the saying, “playin’ opossum.” They are more scared of us!
Is that a real opossum hat? What’s the story?
This here was road kill I found. I didn’t want it to just go to waste, got it right off the highway just a few months back.
You from Seattle? I have never seen you two before.
I am around, I take groups back to Montana and we camp out in the mountains and build camping sites every year. We build dugouts here in Seattle, too, and there is nothing like it, you gotta see it, electricity and all… but the city destroys ’em. Even when the neighbors let us run power down there and are okay with it, the city just don’t want us around.
One time I thought I was being arrested and people were protesting: “Montana didn’t do nothing!” they were shouting. Ended up the [police] needed my help and knew were to find me. They had a wild opossum they were trying to catch. She had just bitten right through an animal-catcher device! They said I was crazy for thinking I could get the thing, but I just stayed calm and talked to her. I get along with critters much better than humans.
Montana, thanks for talking to us! Let’s do a full story sometime soon?
Oh yeah! Lets do it, look me up! See ya!
As long as they don't stab you, crazy people on the loose are hilarious!
its a hobo's life for me!
Cool! I see that guy all over the place... Now I know some of his story..
Wonder where those dugouts are? Hhmmm...
I was once at a county fair in Wyoming, and witnessed a guy try to ride the Gravitron (which I was a passenger on) with his pet raccoon on a shoulder. The carnie was going to let him, until a manager (finally) intervened. It was pretty incredible, but I missed my opportunity to see how a raccoon responds to the gravitron. I choose to believe that Montana and his possum have had similar adventures.
Not to pee on the Happy Hobo Parade, but that guy* comes into the Regrade dog park from time to time, and it seriously pisses me off. Yep, you're cool, got a possum on your shoulder. Rock on, you crazy hobo diamond.
But please don't bring it into an area filled with loose animals genetically engineered to kill rodents. I mean, I keep my terriers out of the off-leash lion reserve (it agitates the lions and endangers my pets), it'd be nice if Montana could be equally considerate.
Granted, if I didn't have dogs, I'd probably think the dude was pretty bitchin'and buy him a tallboy at Kelley's.
*I assume it's the same guy. I'm not sure if there are multiple "Possum Guys" roaming Seattle, but anything's possible in Belltown!
I was there during this photo too - I believe he also told us that it's perfectly legal to eat roadkill in Montana. In fact, I think that's some roadkill he might have eaten on top of his head? Then there was the story about how some cops in Sturgis arrested a crow, a big black crow, for putting a quarter in a girls cleavage.... how the crow had to go to court - but not jail. That would be jail bird...
This guy has some AMAZING stories. He goes to the Pike Place Market every Friday between 2:00 and 4:00. Hit him up.
This is the kind of guy Kerouac wished he could be.
Ahem.
http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/03/all_creatures
Woo hoo! The homeless are funny! Let's not do anything about the problem because they're so entertaining! Especially for people who don't live in Seattle and want life here to be "colorful" and "full of character". What a hoot.
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