2008 The Cloverfield Caucus
posted by February 9 at 13:53 PMon
The gym at Stevens Elementary right now resembles the Brooklyn Bridge scene in Cloverfield—only without the promise of giant, derivative monster showing up to put Capitol Hill caucus-goers out of our misery. And instead of bloodied hipsters asking each other “What the hell is that?” over and over again, it’s roughly 1500 people wearing tasteful scarfs asking each other, “Where the hell is the line for my precinct table?”
Maybe the caucus system works—when precincts have at most 10 people in them and no one gives a fuck about the election. But it’s total pandemonium right now at Stevens Elementary. The lines to sign in—for for precinct—stretches all the way across the gymnasium. Lines to sign in for other precincts intersect with our line and no one is keeping order. Thank God for our neighbor: She commandeered a dozen sign-in sheet from the table and brought them to the end of the line so we could register our preferences and get the hell out. Here’s hoping our sign-in sheets got back up to the precinct table: we didn’t hang around long enough to find out.
Note to the Washington State Democrats: Please don’t put us through that bullshit again. Don’t waste our time. Let us vote in a primary. Yeah, yeah: The caucus system is supposed to build community, or something, since we’re all supposed to gather together with our neighbors and talk about who we’re supporting and why, and make appeals to the braindeads—excuse me, the undecideds—blah blah blah. But the only thing neighbors at Stevens are discussing right now is what a bullshit waste of time this is. You’re going to need smaller precincts, and a lot more precinct sites, and a lot more workers, or you’re going to need to go to a primary system.