Conflict of Interest Buy This Book
posted by on February 14 at 15:21 PM
I contributed an essay to this newly released anthology edited by Ben Karlin, former producer of The Daily Show, founding producer of The Colbert Report. The book has everything Slog readers enjoy…
Gratuitous fat bashing (self-hating variety)…
Now it is not my intention to get all victimy, as I know just as well as the next guy how to put down a spoon. And I don’t really think that the women in my family were conscious of the fact that by overfeeding me they were channelling their aggression towards the women who might one day steal me away. But, while it might not take a whole village, it definitely takes more than one person to make a fat kid.—“Girls Don’t Make Passes at Boys With Fat Asses,” Andy Richter
Pit bull fear mongering…
Alas, like poorly fenced-in pit bulls raised by angry Mexican youths, the complications of life can only be kept at by for so long. Eventually, they will attack and tear you apart, and unless there is some passerby to pull you out of their vicelike jaws, you will be grievously injured, if not killed. Come to think of it, most of that last sentence is just about pit bulls.—“You Too Will Get Crushed,” Ben Karlin
And charming gynophobia…
I wanted to open by saying one nice thing about Wendy’s vagina—I didn’t want to come across as a gay cad (a gad?)—before I set off on a little stroll down Repressed Memory Lane. So here it is: Wendy’s vagina was well concealed. Unlike today’s waxed, shaved, defoliated, clear-cut vaginas, Wendy’s vagina was discretely hidden under what, by modern standards, could only be described as a Van Gogh haystack of curly brown pubic hair.—“I Am a Gay Man,” Dan Savage
There are essays by Stephen Colbert, Neal Pollack, Will Forte, David Wain, Rick Marin, and more. Oh, and about the title of my essay—it completely blows, I realize. I put it on the piece as a place saver, thinking someone, someone funny, would change it, just like all authors’ place-saving headlines are changed before, say, op-ed submissions go to print. Whoops.
Anyway, buy the book, huh?
your essay was funny Dan, and I usually hate your books. Good spin on the rape coming of age thing. Your Mary K Laternau sounded cool.
As somebody who was once dumped like a turd in the middle of downtown Tijuana, I gotta say, this book was one hell of a fun read.
Um, isn't it the labia that get waxed, shaved, whatever? Not the (internal) vagina?
And there is a difference between discretely and discreetly. Wonder if anyone corrected that before it went to press...
are book covers now designed by a committee? or some sort of graphics robot? This style of cover has been on about 30 books in the last three years...
Men's Health Magazine also recommended that I buy this book...and even had your name in there along with only 3 others who contributed.
I was excited to see that. YAY
We were very flattered by the GCP ad campaign, over here at Fantagraphics HQ. From last week's NYer:
From our own Ivan Brunetti:
Hm. Not sure why my image links didn't work. Oh, well.
is it really so hard to use the word VULVA? as in, the external genital organs of the female, including the labia majora, minora, clitoris, and entrance to the vagina?
you really can't SEE a vagina.
I noticed an ad for it in the New Yorker last night ... had meant to check it out ...
@2:
its only the majora that get waxed. the minora are hairless, thank goodness.
@2 and 7, let's remember that Dan is not likely up to speed on female parts. ;-)
Feh, sounds like a boring book for straight people. I'll pass.
@9 - exactly, it would be hard to muff dive otherwise.
In the pit bull piece - what? no editor; viz. kept at by and vicelike jaws.
BTW - What was exactly the title of your so-to-speak piece? In college we frat boys frequently sang: "Nuthin' could be finah than to be in your vagina...."
And there is a difference between "discrete" and "discreet" - think you meant the latter - though I could not offhandedly explain the difference - esp. where bush is concerned.
Monet. Monet loved them haystacks, more memorably than Van Gogh, I believe. But this essay, a splendid essay anyway it will be.
This post is a grammar fiend's dream. I am in agony over 'discretely,' but when you think about it, 'discreetly' is kind of odd too. Her vagina was, what, unnoticeably hidden under her pubic hair? Isn't Dan trying to point out the fact that she had so much hair? Interesting.
art history lameass 14, I think I love you.
Dan, I did buy this book for my boyfriend. I work at Barnes and Noble and when I saw it, I knew it would be perfect. Mostly, I wanted to read it and the excuse of this holiday helped. Thanks for another great read! - Lisa.
Speaking as the father of a ten year old girl, the current craze for "waxed, shaved, defoliated, clear-cut" coochies (the technical term) gives me the heebee jeebees.
Shorter Dan Savage: "Vaginas - they're better hidden, and far away from me."
@17: Fortunately, you won't have to deal with it for another two to six years. And after that, you won't hear anything about it at all. Relax. Though you may try to steer her in the right direction sometime by conversationally mentioning how great pubic hair is and how comfortable you feel wearing what God gave you.
@Dan: Whatever, dude. More for me.
Greg@19-
I'm not worried about how my daughter views the subject- she discusses that kind of stuff with Inga, not me.
I'm worried about a society that fetishizes prepubescent girls.
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