Comments on Wanna Help Make Sure My Son is Straight When He Grows Up?

craigslist, stubhub, or ebay

also dan, aren't you a baseball fan? is it football in general you don't like and if so, why?

Baseball: The game is played in summer (when it's nice out), people cheer when something happens (they don't just scream their heads off the whole time), and when nothing's happening you can chat. Also, baseball is not so militaristic -- and, I don't know, tedious.

I think you have to suck off a scalper or something. Or maybe just give him money. Sucking off might be more though.

One more thing about baseball v. football you forgot Dan:
Baseball: normally proportioned guys, often good looking, playing around in their jammies.
Football: freaky mutants doing violent things dressing in body armor, rarely good looking (with the obvious exception of Tom Brady, but who can tell under the pads?!)

Dan, does Uncle Billy really think that taking your son to a place where men run around in incredibly tight pants, pat each other on the ass, and shower together will help him turn out straight?

thanks for the explanation. the summertime and chatting aspects make sense. though i think it could be argued that baseball is as tedious as football, if not more so.

futhermore, i'm not questioning your parenting skills as i think you're a very smart and logical person, but shit, i'd probably do about anything my kid would want to do (within reason). at the same time, many things my parents made me do (such as theatre) when i was young, i didn't really learn to appreciate until i was a bit older... but now i'm glad they did make me do them.

Dan - you guest on Goldy's KIRO 710 show regularly right? They're the home of the Seahawks and I'll bet they've got tix. Hit someone up over there.

Tell him to catch the team at Husky Stadium instead ...

Why is everyone on Slog so retardedly anti-football? Jeebus people!

So DJ, who is your favorite Seahawk?

The tight end, or the wide receiver?

Tickets on StubHub start around $79 ($90 if they actually want to sit together.)

Disclosure: I work for StubHub's sister company, PayPal.

Wait, are you the Stranger's editorial director?.....

One thing to keep in mind ... The Mariners play 81 home games per season, and the Seahawks play 8.

Consequently, football tickets are hella expensive compared to baseball. Especially for the Bears game (it'll be kinda like when the Yankees are in town, except it only happens once every two years, if that).

Did Dan just try to say that baseball is NOT tedious? I can deal with someone not liking football, but don't make-up such obviously laughable posts to try to make your point. On the tedium scale, watching baseball is somewhere between watching golf and sitting in the DMV for an hour.

@10 - anti-football? Um, dude, Husky Stadium has football.

Real football.

Sheesh.

@10 Four years of high school marching band.

I go to MLB games alot and am a total flamer I guess you could say. I am also, however, a sports fan too. I hope that when he flies all the way out to do this, he ends up having seats right next to someone just like me, What an idiot. Then he will see what real life is about and that sports does not equal straight OR gay but rather, fun.
I can't believe no one is blinking an eye because you are only concerned about finding tickets to a dumb game to perpetuate the ignorant belief that gay "happens" according to your upbringing and surroundings. I think you should be more concerned about yourselves instead of trying to create a clone in your imperfect likeness. What a bunch of ball tossers.

I'll second the stubhub rec. I have used them a couple times for tickets and they are quite nice.

@5:

Baseball players normally proportioned? They're all grotesque arms. Give me a soccer player any day of the week...I heard some rumor there's going to be an MLS team in Seattle come 2009. Now that's a sport to ogle.

10. A lot of these Slog readers are anti pro-sports, mainly because of that whole 'county using public money to build stadiums' and 'players paid millions' thing.

I'm a sports fan, though.

Another difference between baseball and football players are body types. Generally, Basebbll players tend to be leaner and more, uh, lithe, for more of a range of smooth, yet explosive agility, while football players tend to be more compact and wound tight with muscle to they can hit and be hit at full speed without getting smacked apart. Look at soccer and you'll see what the type that succeeds tends to be.

I guess you could say the the road to the pros in any sport tends to select for the most ideal body type.

Oh! Yep, Ebay. You'll pay through the schnoz, but get 'em good seats; your brother's coming all the way to town to take your kid to the game! Hook 'em up. The longer you wait, the higher the prices go.

Dont do scalpers. Dont do EVAy. me and my son always show up day of game and there is always somebody selling 1 or 2 tickets at face value. There is always somebody who can not make the game and has to get rid of the tickets and they dont want to do it on ebay. As a previous scalper ( in Philly) what we use to do is have a sign that said I need tickets, you buy the face value tickets and re sell them ( duh) so your son and chicago fan just go to Qwest and hold out two fingers when somebody goes up just ask em - face value? and bingo. I always get in. ALWAYS. even in the playoffs. Dont listen to these fools, they dont go to the stadium. There. Thats my good deed. Also make sure you sign your son up for football in the Rainier Valley for the Eagles. THatll toughen him up a wee so he is ready for high school football.

Yeah. I'd recommend a Google search for "seahawks tickets". I've never had a problem finding tix.

That and all the "don't do [insert sports] do [other sport]" lame.

Theater vs. Theatre? Can't you interest him in the two cleaner, more beautiful sports, soccer and baseball?

Still, this is damn cute. Please don't ever let your son try American football, or circumcision.

I just so happen to have a pair of bears/hawks tickets. and rams/hawks tix, confidential to mike in mo.

and i plan on enjoying both games.

good luck with griese, asshole!

Stubhub.com.

Just be outside the ballpark and wait for someone to want to sell their tickets (even for face value). They are out there.I've never had a problem getting tickets at face value at U of Michigan football or Detroit Tigers Baseball. Heck, sometimes I've bought them for less than face value. You probably have just as good a chance (probably about 90%) of getting a fairly priced ticket as you are of having a heterosexual son.

I agree with #8 - if you've got those kinds of connections, use them.

Think you ought to reconsider going to the game yourself, though. In the great scheme of things, giving up 3 or 4 hours of your life to give your son a day he'll always remember seems like a pretty easy decision to me.

"I figure DJ wouldn’t sit through Beauty and the Beast with me at the Paramount so I’m not obligated to freeze my ass off at a football game."

Dan, please tell me you don't mean this. Please tell me Billy is a great guy and he and DJ have a great time whenever he's in town, so you think DJ would have a great time with him at the game.

Because otherwise- this is the first thing you've ever written that makes me question your judgement as a parent. And your worth as a human being, honestly.

@30 - kinda right there with "walking my son's dog". just an odd sort of way to talk about your child.

Whatever means you use to get tickets, spend the dough to sit them downstairs. A low, 50 yard line seat will be memorable for your kid and your brother. Check the weather and make sure they're wearing their layers and their slickers.

http://www.seats3d.com/nfl/seattle_seahawks/

Um...may I introduce several of you to Dan Savage? He's funny. Generally speaks flippantly, but lovingly, about his relationship with his son and husband (and everyone else he's close to for that matter). For details, see his published works.

Dan, I'd like to introduce you to Sven, Eighty, momster and a couple others upthread. They have no sense of humor. Happy to allow you to make acquaintance.

For the on topic record--I agree with the stubhub and "outside the stadium" recommendations. And if its ever Michigan Football DJ's after, I have even better suggestions. However, given that both guys I've taken on dates to Michigan football games later came out, I can't guarantee that such viewing would ensure DJ's life as a hetero...

WolverineSax, no offense but I *asked* Dan (not you) if he was being serious or not. Let him speak for himself.

Dan knows that I've defended his views as a parent (on issues such as DJ's private schooling) *dozens* of times on the Slog. But this one doesn't sound right.

Dan,
Your son must be proud.

lead != led

Meow.

You should be going with him to the game yourself. It will be even more meaningful because he'll know you did it even though you don't like it. And who knows? It might make him more willing to go to a show with you later on, thus broadening his horizons and helping him get the chicks later on, should he prove, ultimately, to end up straight when he's older.

Dan, that post made for some great entertainment in the comments. Thank you!

From what I understand, every Seahawks game from now until musical theater finally triumphs over organized sports is sold out.

My God that will be a wonderful day when it finally comes.

Dj should go with his uncle. He will have much more fun if he is with someone who will be enjoying himself and and can explain the game. Children can have plenty of fun w/o parents and its way more fun to watch football live when you either know the game really well (doubtful that DJ does) or are with someone that does.

kinda right there with "walking my son's dog".

Perhaps you are unfamiliar with dogs, but many (if not most) dogs are "one-person" dogs, who are psychologically dependent on a single person. If a child is the primary care provider for the dog, such a dog will usually create a safety/security/care bond with that child that excludes - to a greater or lesser degree - other members of the family.

It's wrong in fact (and unfair to dogs) to impose human kinship and relationship patterns on dogs.

Will in Seattle:

By "real football" you mean a second-tier Pac-10 team that repeatedly disappoints despite bringing in cash hand over fist? That has a roster full of non-student athletes driving Escalades while seldom attending class? A program that has to claim two mythical "national championships" in more than 50 years because it's seldom in contention for the real thing?

Yeah, that's "real football." Give me pro football any day. At least there nobody pretends to be amateurs.

Anyone who tries to profile body types in football are bunch of jackasses. One of the things that's kind of fascinating about football are the MANY types of body types that it takes to run a football squad. The great running backs currently are squirly hard to grab guys under six feet, the great recievers are often long and lanky and potential basketball players. While you're all around fat asses are still on the offensive front line, your defensive front have to be a bit leaner these days. Defensive backs are surprisingly smaller, you would rather have quickness over size.

It's kind of like rugby, it takes all kind of builds. Maybe it is a little militaristic, but there is all sorts of strategy ... in order to be good, there are all sorts of subtle stratagy things that you have to look for.

Still, Dan has every right to not like football. I think baseball is boring as all hell (accept when the yankees lose). I think baseball movies are even worse. (I think football movies might even be worse than baseball movies!!! holy crap) But I don't keep up with stats, running averages, and there are too many worthless games to keep track of or keep my attention. I would like hockey more except for that same exact problem. Being from Southern CT, I root for the red sox over the yankess over the mets ... and I can't STAND yankess fans ....

Good luck getting your kid tickets though. He'll have the time of his life!

huskies are much more exciting, cheaper, and still available.

Honestly ... can someone tell me why U W for all the money they POUR into that football program, they just aren't that good?