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Friday, July 7, 2006

All Children Are Artists

Posted by on July 7 at 15:50 PM

nightmare.jpg

“The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids.” —Jill Bensley


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Holy crap, is that the TV? The sofa? The RUG? Man. Child abuse is justified. Whoop, out that open window you go. Wait, it wasn't open? It is now.

oh god that is one hillarious picture.

Every day I thank non-existant God for my vasectomy. Kids (or hanger bait as I like to call em) ruin everything. You can croon all you want about unconditional love, but I have never had to clean up a mess like that. And I have some rowdy drunken friends. Why do people have kids anyway? Do they wake up one day and say "You know what? Everything I own is too clean. I need some shrieking little monster to get their drool and sticky fingers on everything I hold dear!"

Breeders dim enough to leave a gallon of white paint open around two toddlers should not be allowed to reproduce in the first place.

I think most people have kids because their egos crave mini selves. It's a strong, innate urge. And because parenting gives a futile life a little purpose.

wow. cutnuts: life is messy, and your stuff is probably not that precious. Amy kate: I agree, strong urges are at work but 'futile life...' If life is so futile why does it give us the opportunities it does, such as having children. I don't have any myself, but this pic is great: kids don't respect our expensive plasma tvs and leather couches SO WHAT. ITS JUST ADULT TOYS. Nothing is permanent. Grow up and laugh a little kids!

I do love that someone thought to take a photo rather than spanking the hell out of these kids.

Oh come off it with the blame the kids bit. The kids didn't just pop that can open on their own. The adult who left an open can of white paint in the living room with the kids is an idiot. I don't even have kids and I know better than to do that. Hilarious picture tho. Thanks for sharing AK.

Also, I find it hypocritical when adults, who were likely snot-nosed kids themselves, complain that kids do kid things like make a mess or misbehave.

Good thing for you your Mom didn't consider you to be "hanger bait" cutnuts.

C'mon, that's a really nice TV, and those kids are just worthless little parasites anyways. That TV cost some real money, but you can make more kids for free. Out the window they go.

People have kids for the same reason cats have kids, we just think it's for different reasons because we're idiots.

Now I understand why lions eat their young.

Kids will find cans of paint hidden away in the darkest of corners. Figure how to open the can, because they've seen you do it. Then proceed to destroy shit. That's how it goes. Hopefully they learn it was wrong, grow up, and watch there kids to it to them.

Kids are a reflection of their parents. Parents who let their kids run wild or who are too weak to discipline their children wind up with messes like that.

Wow. Though I am a parent, I almost agree with the out the window thought expressed in these here comments! Yes, parents who leave ANYTHING alone with two toddlers for more than 15 seconds deserve to be shot int he kneecaps. however, as it is NOT my house, floor, TV, couch or children, I laugh uproariously at the whole thing!

Holy moly. I've never read such a bunch of acid about people who have kids! Cut Nuts, I hope you change your tune by the time some of this "hanger bait" grows up, so they can change your diaper at the nursing home when you're all alone, sitting smugly, superior, with those withered raisins between your legs and absolutely no family around you. Awesome!

This photo is more proof of why GAYS SHOULD NOT ADOPT.

Don't get me wrong. Kids are terrific. With a warm arugula-walnut salad, after slow grilling in a pineapple marinade? Oh, hell yes I love kids.

I agree with Fnarf, and a little BBQ sauce from one JohnnyMoFunk makes them so tender too!

re:


Every day I thank non-existant God for my vasectomy.

and


I think most people have kids because their egos crave mini selves. It's a strong, innate urge. And because parenting gives a futile life a little purpose.

the great thing about this sort of pathetic depressive victim-like outlook on life is that these people tend not to have children, thus ensuring that their viewpoint will be less represented in the next generation.

In a few hundreds years this sort of meme will be less common / the number of self-hating depressed folks will be far lower, and an overall slightly more optimistic human race will be doing great deeds without the burden of their carping and nay-saying.

I have a quote on my fridge "we do not remember days... we remember moments." (cesare pavese). That's one heck of a moment. Enjoy. I expect that will be a moment you'll look back on years from now and laugh and smile about. In fact, you took the photo, so you're probably doing so already. I don't care what some of the other "posters" say, I love the smile on your kids faces. Give them a hug for me. :)

I thought the kids' work showed a remarkable formal clarity: that square in front of the couch, and a fairly rectilinear appication to the TV. It was clearly not a destructo-orgy. I say, good work! And, of course, it made a great photo, classic! Worth the commodity 'conversion', I'd say.

I thought the kids' work showed a remarkable formal clarity: that square in front of the couch, and a fairly rectilinear application to the TV. It was clearly not a destructo-orgy. I say, good work! And, of course, it made a great photo, classic! Worth the commodity 'conversion', I'd say.

Super Nanny to the rescue -- I fucking love that show. That british nanny Jo is really kind of hot and I love when she makes them sit in the 'naughty chair'. GRRRRR

I came up with a saying not long ago.

"I'm a reader, not a breader."

Is that like sliced-breads and shit?

Sheesh some of those posters who have made snap judgments about the kids and the parents (cutnuts, keshmeshi, napoleon) I hope you do not have kids, as you are joyless, sanctimonious tossers. Kids do stuff.

The photo made me laugh a lot. The little scamps clearly enjoyed themselves. Oh yes and I am not some soppy liberal. I would have told them both off and they would have known not to do it again for sure. But after I would have laughed myself silly.

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