Slog - The Stranger's Blog

Line Out

The Music Blog

« The Threat of Intelligent Crow... | McGavick's Mixed Messaging »

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Name Seattle’s Newest Gay Bar

Posted by on March 22 at 14:30 PM

So I just ran into the guys who are opening Seattle’s newest gay bar. It’s in the space next door to the Comet, across the street from Neumo’s. It the former location of The Easy. (Gee, remember when Seattle had two dyke bars, not one? Those were the days.) Anyway, they’re having a hard time picking a name. Right now they’re torn between…




I told ‘em I would toss up a Slog post and let Stranger readers weigh in, and they were excited about hearing from you. So is Pulse too circuity? Is Sugar too druggy? Wanna suggest a better name?

It’s going to be a dance club, and the space looks amazing. No word yet on whether or not they’ll be bringing back The Easy’s legendary Monte Christos, but the dance floor is cool, and it looks like they’re going to have a stage, so maybe some enterprising Capitol Hill theater types will be able to, a la Re-bar, mount productions in the space early in the evening before the dancers come out.

So what’s it going to be, faggots?

Pulse? Sugar? Other?

CommentsRSS icon

I vote PULSE. Sugar sounds too girly. No offense to any and all girls, grrrls, and girly guys.

SUGAR, all the way.

I don't think it's wise for a "Hot New Club!" to make a virtue of merely having a PULSE.

Plus, only monsters don't like sugar.

I'm still waiting for a Japanese-themed bar called "Gaysha."

But anyway. Pulse sounds more boring, but people won't make fun of it as much as Sugar. A bar named Sugar is practically begging to be a fad.

I think the most important thing they can do is to adhere to a strict one hag per fag rule.

The cookie monster loves sugar.

SUGAR. pulse sounds like some rave night that i would pay to avoid :(

"The Cookie Monster loves sugar."

True. My statement about monsters not liking sugar is clearly bullshit. Even Hitler enjoyed a Bun Maple now and then.

Jeez, if you're going to name it PULSE why not just call it THROB... cuz that makes me think of my dick.

And everybody likes my dick.

Of the two, definitely "Sugar." "pulse sounds like some rave night that i would pay to avoid," indeed. But of the three, I vote for "Other." Yes, I know it wasn't an actual suggestion, but I think it would be an awesome name for a gay bar.

Pulse is too generically techno. I vote for Sugar.

My vote is for PONCEY.

Sugar: Way too gay.

Pulse: Yeah, whatever. Good enough, I guess.

My vote is for "Plush"

Pulse sounds like a failed magazine.

It also sounds really forced and I feel like I can't say it with a straight face.

Sugar sounds fun and a place that doesn't take itself too seriously. Clubs that take themselves too seriously don't last.

my suggestion:
BP's Pre-Func

How about "Fagbar?"

I kind of like Gaysha, with a Japanese camp theme—sorta like the Japanese version of Bimbo's Bitchen Burrito Kitchen, you know?

What about FagBar?


With all due respect, I must take exception to the "one word, two caps" theme you introduced, which is so dot bomb era. My suggestion was Fagbar, one word, one cap.

Actually Fagbar makes a lot of sense. There's no confusion with what it is and thus less likely to attract the mouthbreathing meatheads that have infiltrated the hill.


both of those names suck. there are probably 50 bars with those names out there. i like the idea of fagbar, but i don't know what zoning laws are there. i would try to do something original and maybe indicative of seattle. maybe name it after niles crane from frazier. he was a total nelly.

Sugar Cube

I tend to agree with Mr. Summerlin on the one-word name dealio.

How about: Club 2661

Sugar? Isn't that also the name of a topless place on Aurora Ave?

Pulse? Does sound a bit shallow, and rather Seventies-ish.


Keep working on it.

Sugar sounds way too nelly. I would not set foot in a bar named Sugar, and I'm as gay as can be.

Pulse does sound like a dick euphemism, and reminds me of Throb as well. Very 1980s.

Gaysha might be a wet dream for rice queens, but it would probably offend as many people as it attracts, and whatever camp value it has would wear out its welcome in about a year.

Fagbar... hmm, it sounds kind of generic and cynical, but you know, it might just work. It does have a modern ring to it.

"Shirtlifters": *chortle* Good one FNARF.

Oh, and starting a new gay dance club a block from Neighbors (which has been around for what, 25+ years?). Good luck with that.

Forget what I said about generic. Fag Bar is so generic it's brilliant!

I thought "Purr" was surely a lesbian bar before I set foot in there, you know with the whole cat reference. Good Lord the boys are pretty there! I'd make an occasional trip to Sugar, Pulse, Sugar Cube, Fag Bar or wherever if the eye candy is that yummy.

David... this is creepy. I didn't see your suggestion—Fagbar—before I made mine—FagBar.

I was typing mine as yours was being posted—look at the times. Is this a great-minds-think-alike moment? Or a gay minds moment?

Anyway, we're usually bickering, but on this let's join forces: Fagbar it is.

Wondertwin powers, activate! Form of...

Remember when marge and her lesbian friend went to Springfield's alt-bar and it was called the "Hate Box". I still get a chuckle out of that, though it's probably not going to do much for the sex appeal of a place to make a Simpson's reference right there in the title.

I'm all for "Fagbar". I would definitely want to tell people I went there.

KT and Dan - didn't Gaysha Star trademark her name? (and I think I've just realized I've lived in Seattle way too long)

Fagbar wins my vote. I agree with David S, one word, one Cap.

Sugar Cube is my second favorite.

You'd have to pay me (a lot of money) to go to a bar called Pulse.

I have to go with Fagbar

Oh wait, Fag in England means cigarette and we know we cant have that

oh wait, no, I vote for Nonsmoking Fagbar, we dont want any trouble with the city council thinking that people might be smoking um er uh... in a bar.


Two suggestions:

1. Tweaker's Corner
2. Bellevue! (the slammer is part of the name!)

I like Fagbar too, except it seems more appropriate for more of a dive like the Crescent or something.
If it's a dance club it should be more fantastical, like, oh, I don't know, Xanadu or something. They could have roller-skating and band fights and...oh wait, I think I've seen that already before...
Maybe Sugar then.

Club Chub


Have you all been run over by the Bang Bus, started thinking with the wrong head, and begun typing out of your assholes?

No fag - not even the nelliest Friendster queen - would suggest to their friends to meet up at FagBar. Not to mention straight people. Imagine the phone conversation when picking a spot to rendezvous....

But go ahead. Name it FagBar, owners, and lose money as the place withers away, just like every club that has been in that space.

FagBar??? You can do better than that. Jesus Christ.

How about cupcake, casbah, orbit, anything kinda fun.

Imagine the phone conversation when picking a spot to rendezvous

"Hey Seal, it's David. You wanna go to fagbar tonight? Yeah, we'll probably get there about ten or so. I know, isn't he fucking hot?. Oh shit that's right, Dina's playing tonight. Well we could stand in line for cancellations, but she'll be sold out by now. Okay, we'll see you at fagbar about ten then. Mmm, you too, sweetie. Bye."


Do you want to go to FagBar?

What, of course we want to go to a fag bar?

No, it's called FagBar.

You want to go where, to a place actually called FagBar? I mean, I know you're gay and I am too, and I love you, but I've got to meet a *man* some day. It will not happen at a place called FagBar.

Yeah, I guess you're right. And the only people who think that place is cool are a bunch of old has-been queers. And, those boys from the Gay City and the bath house.

Hey, didn't you say that hot boy was gonna be at (insert name of place with cool or at least reasonable name)tonight? Let's just go there.

Okay, that place is pretty gay, too. But at least it's not totally ri-cock-ulous.

Cool, sweet pea, see you there.

Or this...

Wanna go to FagBar?

Oh god, that place? It was cool for like a minute. But after the novelty wears off, it's like, "Okay, been to the bar with the stupid name. Next!"

Right. So where do you want to go tonight?

Ring ring.

"Hey Seal it's me again. Listen I know you wanna go to that place with the reasonable name, but I just heard that boy you like is going dancing at fagbar. No, no sweetie, it's not "FagBar," it's "fagbar." Oh no you did not just call me a has-been queer from S.F.! Okay, well, that's actually true, but what about that boy you want to penetrate? Yeah, my husband knows this girl who hangs out with a fag who knows the guy, and he's definitely going to fagbar. Oh, it's just a name, don't pretend like you're too cool for it. Well, okay then, but we're all going to fagbar. I'll set you up with him. So you're just going to stay home and drink vodka and watch porn? Okay then, shoot one off for me. You too, bye."

Sugar! Sugar! Pulse sound so damn generic.

"Sugar" implies middle-aged Bob Mould fans (who I've got nothing against); "Pulse" implies tacky young sluts. Do they have a target market other than gay men (which doesn't narrow it down much)? "Fagbar" would be more inclusive than either.

Sugar without a doubt. Pulse is just a really poor choice, it sounds like a bathhouse with sticky floors. Sugar sounds like a place you could go to and dance your ass off. C'mon gimme some Sugar.


Pulse and Sugar are both lame.

Both Sugar and Pulse are good names compaired to Neighbors, Rplace and C.C.adles. Honestly, could one of those names for a new club be worse than the crap names we already have on the local bars?

C. C. Addles is the worst name for any public establishment of any type anywhere in the world. Worse than T.G.I.F.s or Hooters or even Fuddruckers. That name makes me ashamed to be a human being.


Oooh, Dan, I might just have to abandon our wonder twin alliance in favor of "SANTORUM."

Form of: Slush! Shape of: Jelly!

Call it Asshammer.

Both sugar and pulse reek of the one word splashes you will see on cereal boxes and the batman TV show from decades back. You know...the ones going Boom!, Pow!, Bam! inside the sun/star shapes.

Neither will draw me to the club. Of those choices, I choose #3. Just use the street address.

After Santorum the senator gets bounced in November, you're going to want something to keep his name alive. That's the best idea I've heard yet.

In memory of Seattle's greatest gay bar ( site was torn down last Sunday)
I suggest MOCAMBO

Santorum! Brilliant! I can't believe this thread went on for nearly 50 posts before anyone thought of that. (I'm obviously brain-dead too.) I can't wait to say to someone: "Last week I went inside Santorum," and watch Pepsi spray out their nose. ;-)

Borrow a tag line from Boogie Nights:

"Santorum: come inside us"


"Dear Senator Santorum. I just heard there is a new bar open in Seattle, named in your honor. It's full of fudgepackers. Ta ta."

That should put him into epileptic seizure for about a year, I'd guess.

On second or third thought, if "Hate Box" is a mood killer, imagine thinking about a frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter years down the road, when explaining where you met your beau.

Didn't Brad Steinbacher come up with the best gay bar name: "Cock Pit"? Sure the concept was for an airport gay bar but that's never going to happen so let's hear it for Cock Pit! If you guys don't like that how about "Romulus? Ream us!" or "The Weathered Wall the purity remains." or, or, ah shit just call it Sugar. No matter what you call it it'll be filled with the same guys in the same jeans from ian. Whoopie!


Where are you going tonight? Rehab.

Where did you two meet? We met in Rehab.

It's time for Rehab. :)

I don't like the two choice's very much, they seem like they have been done before. Pulse reminds me too much of that failed Fox News magazine show staring Bill Orielly and Sheppard Smith (I'm sure Geraldo was in there somewhere too). Every time I walk in I would imagine Falafel and No Spin Zones.

I vote Sugar if that is my only choice

If you want something obviously gay, how about Gaydar or Homometer?

Want something more subtle (and realistic?) How about Tryst (possibly too cruisey) or Volatility?

Ahhh hell, why don't we just call it Pretension?

How about Temporary?

Fagbar sounds rad. I totally wanna go.

Hate pulse

Sugars ok

Fagbar rocks though

I hear "Manhole" is available now.

or.. throbbing gristle

Yes, having put the thought out of my mind for a few hours, I'm right back at Fagbar as the best of the bunch, if I do say so myself.

Form of: Glide Lite! Shape of: ...duh.

Sugar is my fav, but the Cockpit may have just edged it out of first place.

please name it Santorum, that would be so fantastic. Hilarious! I'm there.

I'm not too keen on Pulse or Sugar-how's about something like "Jackpot" or "Adam and Steve's"?

Fagbar is too in your face and more of a bar than dance club. Sugar is too sweet but might fit the space because it has a lot of white. Pulse is ok. Orbit may work...

How about Temporary?


But my vote is still for Fagbar.

Honorable mention: cockpit, though that would probably be more appropriate for the kind of small, cruisy tavern where I'm in danger of being pissed on.

I change my vote: Santorum is a better name

Sugar Sugar Sugar!!!

I got it!! Name it, ready folks...


Or how bout EyeMan after our favourite initiative whore?!!!(get it, Tim Eyeman...)

Imagine this, Hey your boyfriend is hot, where did you meet him? I met him at Sugar last week and damn if he isnt the sweetest thing. Its so perfect, a sweet bar for sweet boys!

after our favourite university in Tulsa

The name "Pulse," which was on the reader board outside the club as of yesterday, is now gone. YAY! I'd go to Fagbar if only because I'd be pretty sure no frat-boy homophobes would be there.

Sugar sounds like a lesbian bar—sugar walls, and like that.

train wreck or just Wrecked

spin spin shoogah

I'd suggest a name with a broader appeal. People are going to come back based on the experience and not the name. There is a great dance bar in Montreal called Parking. A simple name, but a great dance bar. Everyone is always complaining about a lack of parking on Capitol Hill right? Just a thought.

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 45 days old).