And even more sorry to be the self-appointed word cop (is there any other kind?) up in this piece, but there it is: So there I was, editing a story by Eli Sanders for the forthcoming issue… Don’t worry, I’m not going to spoil it for you (but certain parades I could name had better watch their backs). Anyway, this otherwise trenchant analysis by my estimable colleague contained a construction that has been making me crazy for a while now. I’m willing to stipulate that the fact that I work for The Stranger might give me an unusually high exposure to this phrase, but can we all come together for a moment on the question of “assless chaps”? Though I am no expert (nor by any means a cowboy), I feel pretty strongly that all chaps are by definition assless, inasmuch as their very asslessness is what makes them chaps. Assless pants? Yes, please. Assless chaps? The answer’s in the question.