Bad eclipse weather: Western Washington may be socked in by clouds when eclipse time rolls around starting at 10:29 am, peaking at 11:29 am, and ending by 12:21 pm, but don't let your FOMO get you down. Cloud-cover is thwarting much of the path of totality's eclipse-viewing, with overcast skies forecasted from "Texas to southern Arkansas and Ohio, northwest Pennsylvania and New York," according to KING 5. The best shot to see the eclipse is in "parts of northern New England and an area from northern Arkansas to central Indiana" where it'll be cloud free. 

Still, you might as well take a peek: I'm going to look toward the sky—or, toward the shadows on the ground—come eclipse time, clouds be damned. If you look at the eclipse, remember to wear eclipse glasses. See? Even the mob wears eclipse glasses:

Pick up your pooch's poop: If you don't pick up your dog's shit, then diseases will spread. One place where disease is spreading is Petrovitsky Park in Renton. According to a Renton animal hospital, Petrovitsky Park is the source of multiple canine parvovirus infections, a virus that causes bloody diarrhea in dogs. 

Seattle Public Schools' budget nightmare: For the 2024-2025 school year, the school district has "a projected budget deficit of $104 million-$111 million," according to the Seattle Times. With the loss of COVID-19 relief dollars and a drop in attendance—a figure that determines state funding for schools—SPS and other school districts nationwide are scrambling. Plans for cost-saving this year are short-term solutions. The following school year's budget, 2025-2026, may see "school closures, consolidations, grade reconfigurations, and program readjustments."

Okay, well, no one asked you: The Vatican released a 20-page declaration called "Infinite Dignity," which it's been cooking up for five years. They should have kept this thing in the vault. In the pages of Infinite Dignity, the Vatican declared gender-affirming surgery and surrogacy "grave violations of human dignity... on par with abortion and euthanasia as practices that reject God’s plan for human life," according to the Associated Press. To the Pope, all I can say is, girl, shut up and count your rosary beads. No one asked you. 

And now, a word from Ashley on the cops. 

Seattle police union posts contract: The Seattle Police Officers' Guild posted its tentative agreement with the City online for a few hours Friday before removing the file from its site, but we caught some of the details before the contract went down. The details are not good. The City plans to pay cops a buttload of cash in exchange for basically no accountability measures. Advocates and analysts expected the big payout, but the absolute lack of real changes to accountability seemed wildly off. Also, the union backdated their pay to Jan 6, 2021, which seemed weird. With the Seattle Police Department known as the department with the most cops present at the insurrection, the move seems like an Easter egg for “Thin Blue Line” superfans. 

Thanks, Ashley!

Father of the year: A Kentucky man faked his own death to avoid paying $100,000 in child support, he admitted in court. In order to become legally dead to stiff his ex-wife and children as a stiff, Jesse E. Kipf, 39, allegedly "accessed the Hawaii death registry system in January 2023 using the details of a doctor living in another state and created a case for his own death," then he appointed himself the medical certifier and certified his death in governmental databases.  

Trump won't say if he would sign national abortion ban (he would): Donald Trump stated his position on abortion on Truth Social, saying it should be left up to the states. "My view is now that we have abortion where everybody wanted it from a legal standpoint, the states will determine by vote or legislation or perhaps both," Trump wrote. Trump did say he was in favor of exceptions for "rape, incest, and life of the mother." While Trump did not speak about a total abortion ban if he were to become president again, he did say he was "proudly the person responsible for ending” constitutional abortion in this country, and he took credit for the US Supreme Court's repeal of Roe v. Wade. 

Lindsay Graham 'respectfully disagrees:' Graham would like to see a national 15-week abortion ban. Graham doesn't believe abortion is a states' rights issue. But of course, this is all theater. Trump will certainly sign an abortion ban. Republicans are just spinning up this nonsense because they didn't think the anger and political realignment that came as a result of stripping bodily autonomy from half the population would survive more than a couple of news cycles. 

Smoke tricks from Etna: Italy's Mount Etna puffed out smoke rings, or "volcanic vortex rings" as scientists know them, over the weekend. The rings came from magma bubbling under a cylindrical vent underneath a new crater on Etna's surface.

UW researchers look for the bright side: University of Washington scientists are studying how to artificially brighten clouds to make them reflect more light back to space as a defense against climate change. 

More bad news for Boeing: An engine cover on a Southwest Airlines flight from Denver fell off during take-off, striking a wing flap and forcing the plane to turn around. The plane was a Boeing aircraft.

Maybe some debt relief? Joe Biden really must be feeling the election-year heat. The president is expected to announce a student-debt relief plan for millions of Americans bogged down in loan payments. According to the plan, around 10 million borrowers would see at least $5,000 relieved, while four million borrowers could have their debts completely wiped away. Even more millions of people would see some reduction in what they owe under Biden's new plan, which he's expected to announce in swing-state territory, aka Madison, Wisconsin. The new plan will face similar opposition as Biden's first attempt at student debt relief, which failed. However, regardless of whether this plan is also struck down, Biden would like some credit that he is trying. 

Good for them: Today, I'm rooting for all the couples at the mass eclipse weddings across the country.

Aid still stalling in Gaza: In the wake of the Israel Defense Forces’ killing of seven international aid workers, at least four organizations announced they had stopped delivering aid into Gaza as of Monday. The killings of the humanitarian workers put a spotlight on the IDF's practices, specifically their disregard for aid workers. The United Nations found "a total of 224 humanitarian aid workers have been killed since the start of the war."

Rudy Giuliani weighed in on Friday's tri-state area earthquake: Giuliani said "the communist states are getting earthquakes" and that "somebody's sending us a message." Whatever helps you chip away at your mountain of legal debt, Rudy. 

For all of us eclipse-less losers: Here is a livestream to watch come eclipse time.