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Congratulations, David! That was a beautiful post by your father-in-law.

Posted by Bub | October 5, 2008 2:38 PM

Congrats on having a great father-in-law, David! Oh, and on getting married, too. Woo!

Posted by Stephanie | October 5, 2008 2:38 PM

He's not getting excommunicated from anything that matters. He's being confirmed in the Church of Decent People Treating Each Other With Love. What a proud and beautiful thing he did, writing and publishing that. You're a lucky man, Dave. Congratulations.

Posted by Fnarf | October 5, 2008 2:41 PM

I concur, you are fortunate to have a loving and supportive FIL, David. (Not FILF, you perverted sloggers).

Congratulations, and I hope he and his ilk bring LDSers into the 21st century.

Posted by emma's bee | October 5, 2008 2:46 PM

David - some times it is not cool to mock.

Your partner's dad will not be excommunicated. I lived in Utah for a couple of years and met tons of gay guys quite open and none were under the threat of excommunication.

They were very nice guys and maybe shaped by a culture with a lot of down to earth helping and caring about other people, like Jake? All, despite some very backwards stuff as doctrine. Of course as religion goes, they are not alone in America for weird stuff about homos.

Slowly, ever so slowly, the LDS Chrurch is getting modern - they recently decided drinking liquor is a personal choice and no longer oppose major changes in Utah liquor laws.

I scan the Salt Lake Tribune online once or twice a week, and, just a couple of days ago, SLC put out a letter to Mormon members to get their food supplies and cash to snuff to ride out the hard times coming, and to build food reserves/supplies to "help feed others."

Kinda cool. And very very grounded.

Posted by Eric | October 5, 2008 2:49 PM

Congratulations, David.

Here's wishing you many years of happiness.

Posted by Ryan | October 5, 2008 3:00 PM

Bet Jake's dad has been or is a Bishop?

fnarf, often, you are so jaded and arrogant. Jake's dad is not suffering for your opining measure of his faith/Faith.

Bet there are a few nieces and nephews in the clan, they will love their different uncles. Great stories for school and friends. Role models too, of course.

Congrats, David.

Posted by Aaron | October 5, 2008 3:01 PM


Posted by Gloria | October 5, 2008 3:08 PM

Beautiful. Let me join in wishing you congrats.

Also, Michael Weiner is a sad pathetic asshole, and gosh willing he and his tiny audience will all soon die. Hopefully long painful deaths, but I'd settle for quick and painful, just as long as they die die DIE!

Posted by Mike in MO | October 5, 2008 3:14 PM

Huge congratulations to you and Jake.

Posted by Lawks a Lordy | October 5, 2008 3:15 PM

Aww, that's beautiful. Congratulations!

Posted by Sasha | October 5, 2008 3:23 PM

That's awesome David. My friend (a father of five!) got ex-communicated when he came out 10-15 years ago, I dunno what the policy is on fathers-in-law.

Posted by Uncle Vinny | October 5, 2008 3:28 PM

Mazal tov!

Posted by LMSW | October 5, 2008 3:35 PM

@5. I fail to see how Dave was mocking in his comment about excommunication. If you are gay, you can be excommunicated from the Mormon church. And, as the link in his post suggests, apparently you can be excommunicated for publicly supporting gay marriage.

That was a wonderful letter that your father-in-law wrote (and your piece from June was a great one as well). Congratulations!

Posted by Julie in Chicago | October 5, 2008 3:41 PM

The letter is very sweet.

Posted by VDD | October 5, 2008 3:42 PM

Congratulations, David! That's a really touching article. You have a lovely new family. Brought a tear to my eye. Congrats again!

Posted by REM | October 5, 2008 3:53 PM

Where do I send the dozen roses and the box of chocolates? Congratulations on your wedding.

Posted by Sargon Bighorn | October 5, 2008 4:07 PM

You are concerned with what Michael Weiner thinks?? He "hung" out with Allen (I like little boys) Ginsberg.

Posted by Shawn Fassett | October 5, 2008 4:10 PM

@7 -- jaded and arrogant? Huh?

Posted by Fnarf | October 5, 2008 4:12 PM

You made me cry... so sweet. And wonderful.

Posted by M | October 5, 2008 4:19 PM

I don't post often, but congratulations Dave. The letter is eloquent and brightened my morning.

Posted by Leslie N. | October 5, 2008 4:19 PM

May I add my congratulations also!! Wonderful news, wonderful words.

From a california voter -- I say NO ON PROP 8!!!

Posted by Sachi Wilson | October 5, 2008 4:25 PM

Congratulations David! What's really surprising to me about that article is that the comments are mostly supportive of your FIL.

Posted by Mike in Renton | October 5, 2008 4:28 PM

Congratulations David!

Posted by Mathew | October 5, 2008 4:31 PM

Congratulations on your wedding! Wow, what a lovely letter from your father inlaw.

@5 - Um, what? I see no mockery of LDS here. Really, I looked at the post several times but saw only celebration of a wedding, a father/father inlaw's love and well-justified outrage at ongoing homophobia. Please do not taint the spirit of support for David Schmader with your defensiveness about LDS.

Posted by know-it-all | October 5, 2008 4:39 PM

Congratulations David, both on your marriage and on winning the in-law lottery. That letter was lovely.

Posted by PopTart | October 5, 2008 5:03 PM


Posted by jon c | October 5, 2008 5:05 PM

thanks for posting this! I sent the article to my mom who is LDS and was on the verge of shameful tears all the way through my gay wedding in August.

Posted by crystina | October 5, 2008 5:09 PM

Congratulations, David. I trust that you both wore white.

Posted by Sean | October 5, 2008 5:23 PM

Congrats! Such a sweet post, Happy happy!

Posted by hoorah! | October 5, 2008 6:01 PM

Congratulations! I'm getting more excited every day to cast my "no" vote.

By the way, the comments on the SL Trib's site are pleasantly surprising. I (rightly or wrongly) expected a different general response.

Posted by California | October 5, 2008 6:07 PM

Dude, you're gay? Oh, that's too rich... I know five straight girls who regularly attend Slog Happy Hour who think you're straight as an arrow, and want to marry you. They're going to be so disappointed.

Still, great story. Congratulations!

Posted by James | October 5, 2008 6:17 PM

aaron@7: jaded and arrogant? wtf are you talking about? fnarf? do you have reading comprehension problems or something? confusing him w/someone else?

Posted by ellarosa | October 5, 2008 6:18 PM

How wonderful! I read your print piece on it and sighed a nice sigh, but this was teary city. Yay.

Posted by tomasyalba | October 5, 2008 6:21 PM

oh, and really, david, why would you even THINK of letting that rabid dog michael savage have any effect upon you? good god, man, you might as well wring your hands over the ravings of a mental ward patient.

Posted by ellarosa | October 5, 2008 6:21 PM

Sincerest congratulations David and Jake!! I wish you the best.

Posted by Soo | October 5, 2008 6:22 PM

Congratulations David and Jake!

p.s. Please tell me Dan isn't related to that douche bag Michael Savage. When I read the headline the first thing I saw was "Savage...railing against gay marriage..." I had a brief WTF moment.

Posted by Y.F. | October 5, 2008 6:33 PM

David, you made me tear up. My mother in law was excommunicated from the LDS church back in 1968 for being a feminist. She's one of the best people I've ever met, which has rather set my faith against that faith. But in fairness, they produced my mother in law.

My sense is that they aren't so aggressive about excommunication these days.

Posted by Ratatosk | October 5, 2008 7:07 PM

Michael "Savage" is not related to Dan. Dan's real name is Savage; Michael's is Weiner, but he changed it because he's ashamed to be Jewish.

Posted by Fnarf | October 5, 2008 7:32 PM

I'd like to remind people in Arizona that they should be voting "NO" on Prop 102. It is Arizona's ban on gay marriage or domestic partnerships sponsored and funded by (drum roll please) the Church of LDS. Because it's ok for 50 year old men to f**k a harem of 12 year old girls but what two consenting adult homos do in the privacy of their own home is perverted.

Posted by yucca flower | October 5, 2008 7:33 PM

I actually feel sorry for Michael Savage, I've never seen anyone in greater need of an ass pounding.

Posted by mnm | October 5, 2008 8:02 PM

Did Mormons do the Inquisition?

Or burn witches?

Once read they were anti slave which was a big part of their problems in the 1850's?

I don't like any of the organized religions except Unitarians ... oh well.

Congratulations to Jake and David. Where are the pix?

Posted by Anna | October 5, 2008 8:19 PM

Congratulations to you and Jake
there is hope and love.

Michael Savage is sorely short of both

Posted by 4f...sake | October 5, 2008 8:24 PM

I saw that letter this morning in the Tribune, and was so happy to see it.

Posted by Terry | October 5, 2008 8:34 PM

Congratulations and here's to many more happy years together!

Posted by litlnemo | October 5, 2008 9:16 PM

deepest congrats on both the wedding and for having such a great FIL.

Posted by gnossos | October 5, 2008 9:26 PM

What a beautiful letter, David.. teared me right up. Congratulations!

Posted by brad | October 5, 2008 9:28 PM


Posted by Griet | October 5, 2008 11:12 PM

Congratulations. What a beautiful sentiment from your FIL. Makes me proud to be an ex Mormon. (I mean that in a good way.) Cheers!

Posted by Suz | October 5, 2008 11:22 PM


sometimes parents can be the best. congratulations on a fine pick.
rob and i wish you and jake a lifetime of happiness and joy..
and even though we hardly ever see you, know that you're on our june..
did y'all have cake ?

Posted by reverend dr dj riz | October 6, 2008 6:58 AM

Congratulations Dave, count me among the teary eyed. This was a beautiful thing to post, here's to an even happier life for you!

Posted by Susan Rathke | October 6, 2008 8:37 AM

Congrats David, this made my morning too. Best of wishes for you and your husband.

Posted by Original Monique | October 6, 2008 9:16 AM

Yeah, yeah and yeah David and Jake!

All my wishes for happiness in your shared future.

With such a cool FIL you are very lucky indeed.

Photos, please......

Posted by Gidget | October 6, 2008 9:53 AM

Congratulations to the both of you!

Posted by inkweary | October 6, 2008 11:58 AM

Congratulations on all your blessings and thanks for the lovely post.

And, really, who cares about Michael Weiner? Nothing he could say could upset me. These people are beyond hate and past satire and in a realm of just babbling idiots preaching to a choir of babbling idiots. Work against them as you would any mindless evil, but don't let them affect you.

Posted by whatevernevermind | October 6, 2008 12:39 PM

Congrats, Dave. My in-laws were wonderful too. My other half died before we had a chance to get legally married anywhere at all, but they treated me like their own and I still talk to mom (dad died of brain cancer a couple of years ago, but he also was good to me)

Posted by Bruce | October 6, 2008 4:20 PM

Oh @5, you kill me! I live in Salt Lake and grew up Mormon. Most of my family is still Mormon. WHERE did you get the idea that alcohol drinking was now a personal choice? That is HI-larious.

And the stuff about building food supplies for hard times? It's old pulpit stuff about being prepared for the Last Days. Seriously.

AND I have a friend who was excommunicated last fall for being gay and out. So that's that.

Thanks for the laugh.

Oh yeah: David, congrats a million times. I read your FIL's letter aloud to my husband the other day and we were both so happy for his thoughts. It gives one hope.

Posted by Hrothgar | October 7, 2008 11:15 PM

As another Salt Laker born a Mormon, I can attest with Hrothgar that alcohol is still forbidden among The Brethren.

That letter was really touching. The Mormon Church is doing everything it can to abolish marriage equality in California. We can only hope that their efforts fail miserably.

Posted by Brandon Burt | October 10, 2008 12:02 AM

I am SO glad it was I who excommunicated the church so many years ago! I would NEVER want to be involved with an organization (especially a so-called religious one) who so blatantly speaks from both sides of its mouth. Congratulations, David. May you and Jake enjoy many, many years of equality with the rest of humanity.

Posted by Arlis | October 10, 2008 7:15 PM

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