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Thursday, October 9, 2008

Election Q&A; or, Oh Dear God

posted by on October 9 at 14:01 PM

Hey Stranger: My mother told me that you must fill out absentee ballots in #2 pencil or they wouldn’t be counted. She also said people whose homes were in foreclosure wouldn’t be able to vote. Are these things true? Thank you.

Dear son of a horribly misinformed mother: Neither of those things is true. You’re welcome.

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Baaahahahah!! Women.

Posted by Mr. Poe | October 9, 2008 2:08 PM

When do absentee ballots get mailed out in WA State?

Posted by Danny | October 9, 2008 2:10 PM

She also told me that Obama was a terrorist-loving muslim and that I'll go to hell if I touch myself. Are these things true? Thank you.

Posted by son of a horribly misinformed mother | October 9, 2008 2:11 PM

the writer was a man.

mr. poe is a misogynist.


Posted by jrrrl | October 9, 2008 2:13 PM
Posted by benno | October 9, 2008 2:17 PM

Your mom is a man. Burn!

Posted by oh snap! | October 9, 2008 2:17 PM

Oh man, if Stranger readers are buying (or even considering buying) this crap, we're really screwed.

Posted by Levislade | October 9, 2008 2:22 PM

You also can't vote if your bed isn't made, if your tires are more than 5% underinflated, if you fail to look both ways when crossing the street in front of your polling place, if you have ever rubbed a dog's belly, if you have any suspicious bulges in the shape of your head, or if your hair looks "hinky".

Posted by Fnarf | October 9, 2008 2:23 PM

@2 - October 15th-18th for king county:

it's in green on the righthand side of the main page.

Posted by jezbian | October 9, 2008 2:24 PM

I bet the mom is beautiful.

Posted by Mr. Poe | October 9, 2008 2:24 PM

make that October 15th-17th.


Posted by jezbian | October 9, 2008 2:25 PM


The absentee ballots will be mailed out between October 13-16 according to King County Elections. I received mine a couple of days ago because I'm out of the country, so they mailed me a "military ballot" which I can safely assume KCE mails out earlier because of the length of time foreign mail sometimes takes.

The ballot, by the way, clearly states to use dark ink. Pencil marks could easily be erased and changed. You wouldn't want to vote in pencil.

Posted by Bauhaus | October 9, 2008 2:30 PM

Mr. Poe's mother hates him.

Posted by Karla | October 9, 2008 2:43 PM

She's not the only one.

Posted by Mr. Poe | October 9, 2008 2:58 PM

Don't despise Mr.Poe...he's just lonely.

Posted by Evie | October 9, 2008 2:58 PM

Neither thing is true - but how did Somebody's Mother come to believe these things? That might be significant in the dirty tricks department.

Posted by RonK, Seattle | October 9, 2008 3:08 PM

Jeez buddy, don't vote. I bet you're undecided, too. Just rest your head and stay at home.

Posted by heywhatsit | October 9, 2008 3:14 PM

You have to fill out your form such that it can be read by a machine that you don't have. Much simpler than a #2 pen requirement.

Posted by daniel | October 9, 2008 3:55 PM

Mr. Poe: my eyes burn, you bastard. May wine NEVER pour from your tap!

Posted by TVDinner | October 9, 2008 3:56 PM

Don't forget that there's a special date for Republican and GOP voters - November 27th. If you try to vote before then, you might turn gay.

Posted by Catalina Vel-DuRay | October 9, 2008 3:58 PM

You can't vote if you have any unpaid parking tickets or library fines, if you were dismissed from jury duty, or were ever late on a rent or mortgage payment. Well you CAN, but they won't count it. You will, however, be absolutely barred from the polling place if you roll your socks together rather than folding them.

Posted by Seajay | October 9, 2008 9:26 PM

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