Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« If I Wasn't Such a Fucking Eli... | The End of 60 Minutes Last Nig... »

Monday, September 22, 2008

The Missing Category

posted by on September 22 at 11:38 AM


The letter of my year:

Ciao Stranger,

I read your annual back to school issue, and I think you forgot to include one category. I would call it something like:

“How to avoid getting thrown into an Italian jail under the accusation of murder”
You are having the time of your life spending a semester abroad in one of the most beautiful countries in Europe. Parlando italiano, mangiando il cibo magnifico, and fucking loads of men, Italian or not. So how do you avoid those pesky murder charges? When your roomate comes home and becomes enraged when she finds you, your boyfriend, and the local drug dealer engaged in a hash transaction, do not: one, toss her cell phones out the window when she tries to call the police, two, do not threaten her with a knife, and then accidentally kill her. Instead, tell her to fuck off, stomp out of the house, finish the drug deal at the boyfriend’s house, and find a new roomate.

Hope this will be useful to future students going abroad!



Word, Theo! Now each one teach one.

RSS icon Comments


And Theo for the win.

Posted by Billy Nilly | September 22, 2008 11:30 AM

That blouse really brings out the crazy in her eyes.

Posted by Greg | September 22, 2008 11:38 AM

Is she related to Chuck Knox?

Posted by DOUG. | September 22, 2008 12:11 PM

thank you theo for the first logical explanation of what the fuck happened that i've read.

Posted by max solomon | September 22, 2008 12:37 PM

Thats sounds pretty reasonable. Mudede' s lurid description of a sex romp gone wrong struck me as the salacious imaginings of a stone cold pervert, not realistic MO.

Posted by Rotten666 | September 22, 2008 12:42 PM

She is creepy. I can't figure out what the fuck she did or knows, but she is creepy.

Posted by Vince | September 22, 2008 1:34 PM

Charles, do you now endorse the interrupted-drug-deal/accidental-knifing theory? And recant the sex-party-gone-wrong theory? Or if you'd like, what are the odds for each, in light of your reporting and subsequent revelations? Weigh in, please--

Posted by Tim Appelo | September 22, 2008 2:04 PM

I find her foxy in a whitebread-chick-sex-murder sort of way.

Posted by eric | September 22, 2008 2:28 PM

@8. No doubt, I would totally tag that. She's hot.

Posted by Rotten666 | September 22, 2008 2:35 PM

Tim, i have no idea what happened in that cottage almost a year ago. noting adds up. noting. the amanda story is the hole that refuses to be anything but a hole in my head.

Posted by charles mudede | September 22, 2008 2:49 PM

Me, I'm still turned on by the Italian police woman you always see with her.

Posted by elenchos | September 22, 2008 3:05 PM

yeah, I'm with @8 and 9. It actually kind of freaks me out that I find her hot in this picture -- I'm a bad, bad boy.

Posted by bookworm | September 22, 2008 3:34 PM

What the fuck kind of troll claw grip is that lady using to hold her arm???

Posted by Super Jesse | September 22, 2008 3:50 PM

Comments Closed

Comments are closed on this post.