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Tuesday, September 23, 2008

“I Want This Motherfucking Whale Off This Motherfucking Boat!”

posted by on September 23 at 14:00 PM

Ain’t It Cool News points to this article in Variety. The director of Night Watch and Wanted is filming a re-imagination of Moby Dick.

The writers revere Melville’s original text, but their graphic novel-style version will change the structure. Gone is the first-person narration by the young seaman Ishmael…This change will allow them to depict the whale’s decimation of other ships prior to its encounter with Ahab’s Pequod, and Ahab will be depicted more as a charismatic leader than a brooding obsessive…”Our vision isn’t your grandfather’s ‘Moby Dick,’ ” Cooper said. “This is an opportunity to…tell what at its core is an action-adventure revenge story.”

At first blush, I think this has to be a joke, but then I remember the Demi Moore version of The Scarlet Letter, with its happy ending, and I bet this will actually happen.

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Posted by Lindy West | September 23, 2008 2:19 PM


Posted by monkey | September 23, 2008 2:22 PM

if ahab is a fucking charismaitc leader then moby dick loses a lot of its meaning.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | September 23, 2008 2:25 PM

Just because he was a leader and charismatic, doesn't make that the dominant theme.

Posted by vooodooo84 | September 23, 2008 2:27 PM

also, "Action-adventure revenge story" what the fuck is this? Payback 2: now the Whale gets it?

Posted by vooodooo84 | September 23, 2008 2:29 PM


I'd rather see them remake it as an interspecies romantic comedy. Now that has potential!

Posted by ay1ene | September 23, 2008 3:08 PM

It sounds as if it is going to be a tale of whale payback. Who today, could sell a story in which whale hunting per se, is seen as a public good? In Melville's time it was. Ahab was rather charismatic, when Starbuck tried to rally the men to leave off looking for Moby and get down to making money, Ahab turned the crew in his own favor. All in all it sounds really horrible. I wonder if Moby will have an Orca sidekick from the 'hood?

Posted by inkweary | September 23, 2008 3:27 PM

This movie was already made. It was called "Orca: The Killer Whale" and it starred Bo Derrick. Also, the whale was able to blow up a factory from the motherfucking water. Beat that modern cinema.

Posted by Michael | September 23, 2008 8:00 PM

Maybe a "re-imagined" version of "A Tale Of Two Cities" is needed, where Carton doesn't go to the guillotine?

Posted by Tiktok | September 23, 2008 8:44 PM

I just hope they keep all the ultra-obsessive, scientifically accurate chapters about making candles out of whale fat, dimensions of a whaling vessel, population of Queequeg's African village, and the like.

Posted by kebabs | September 24, 2008 12:28 AM

Why do they blame this desecrating dump of whale dung on graphic novels?

Did graphic novels take their leg or something?

Posted by rain | September 24, 2008 8:25 AM

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