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Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Godless America: Part II

posted by on September 3 at 17:02 PM

Do they give delegates a script?

All of them today are talking about Palin’s credentials (“she’s the CEO of a state that makes a lot of money and she’s the CEO of a family”), the protestors (“if they had any love for our country, they would not do this… they should ask permission to protest”), and 9/11 (“Bush has kept us safe—if he wasn’t president, they would have hit us again”).

The good news: Every single one has agreed that the party is moving away from evangelicalism/social conservatism—which is great fucking news. Because those gay-hating, pot-hating, hypocritical dirtbags are the dregs of American politics and they’ve had far too much influence for far too long.


Phyllis Gorman, from Oklahoma, on the fall of the evangelicals:

“The social conservatism came in the ’90s. Small-government conservatives is what we were before. And we’re returning to that.”


Tim Babcock, former soldier, trucker, and governor of Montana (and the oldest delegate at this convention):

“There’s a little trend in that direction [away from social conservatism]. And I’m not so sure that’s all bad. We’ve become a little more conscious of other countries and the needs of the world.”

(His cell phone ring: A synthesizer version of “When the Saints go Marching In.”


Ed Gudknect:

“I’m no evangelical. You gonna put my picture in the paper? They make stuff up.”


Bill and lil’ Walker Gombor:

[Well, he deferred on the question. Which I take as a no. Since evangelicals are supposed to, you know, evangelize.]


Gabriela Wyatt, from Illinois:

“I’m a Catholic.”

And so on. None of these people said they were for marriage equality or legalization or choice—but it’s a good sign that “evangelical” and “religious right” are bad words in these parts.

Also: The RNC has been sending out emails with excerpts from the speeches tonight by Palin, Huckabee, et al. They’re “embargoed until delivery,” but a teaser: Palin sold the former governor’s plane on Ebay, lots of talk about smaller government (which is a [very] oblique hit on the Bush administration), and not one mention of anybody’s Lord and Savior.

Also-also: I’ll be liveblogging Palin’s speech later tonight (somewhere between 9 and 10 pm Minnesota time).

Stop by and tear it up the comments.

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i can hardly believe it. republicans becoming NOT complete backward assholes? i'm not sure who i am anymore. i never dreamed they'd evolve. i just thought they'd die out and/or succeed in killing us all off.

Posted by adrian | September 3, 2008 5:26 PM

They're moving away from backwards evangelical social-conservatism back to fiscal conservatism by going bananas over an evangelical social conservative with the fiscal probity of a crackhead? Yeah. Pull the other one, it's got bells on.

Posted by Fnarf | September 3, 2008 5:33 PM

Palin's just a bauble on the tide, Fnarf. Tonight's her night, but the evangelicals' days are numbered.

Posted by Brendan Kiley | September 3, 2008 5:40 PM

Um gee, ya think they're telling you exactly what you want to hear?

Meanwhile, the real plan to turn the truck-loads of wild-eyed, Bush-crazed psychopaths in the US military into an American religious police force is moving along swimmingly. No one expects the American Inquisition!

Posted by Original Andrew | September 3, 2008 5:44 PM

They can say that all they want, but until they abandon even the pretense of ruling by majority consensus, they need jingoistic fundamentalism as a cover. "Fiscal conservatism" translates as "tax breaks for the rich and no-bid contracts for my friends," which benefits far too narrow a band of voters to ever win elections on its merits. If it weren't for abortion they would be exactly nowhere. That issue alone has convinced three decades of working class Evangelicals to vote against their own economic self interest.

Sure, the rich ones admit they'd like to quit lying about believing that crap when they get off on their own with a few drinks in them. But no way in hell will they return to being the Republican Party of Goldwater until they figure out some other means of fleecing the rubes.

Posted by flamingbanjo | September 3, 2008 6:50 PM

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