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Friday, August 29, 2008


posted by on August 29 at 22:28 PM


Who would’ve thought a one-off post about arts criticism would’ve kicked off such a shitstorm?

A sampling of the comments:

Brendan you are fucking dick: go die you talentless vulture of a journalist.
Thoughtful criticism is all very well, but personally I prefer praise.
Whether or not it’s hurtful, becoming morally pious about your work just because you put a lot of effort into it is still a counterproductive mindset. Effort is not a coupon for freedom from criticism.
kiley’s absolutely correct in everything he points out and he’s made it clear to me why i despise his brand of ‘criticism’ so..

But I would like to draw your attention to comment #73 on said post, a successful parody of this small joke—note to over-literal readers: a joke! not a real review!—in our Bumbershoot guide:


Click here to see the parody.

I salute you, Rudnik Nelson, wherever you are. Just one correction: We write on computers in Tim Keck’s basement “on beanbag chairs.” Most of our parents changed the locks on us long ago.

(p.s. It’s muggier than a newlywed’s bed in St. Paul this evening, and police have already arrested two protestors setting up an encampment in a city park. Sixty cops showed up, one of them a sniper type with an assault rifle. These people are not fucking around.

My host here—a friend of a friend who happens to be a National Guardsman studying to be a police officer—says his law-enforcement school will be shut down during the convention because they need every human they can find for security and riot alert. If any city is going to “recreate ‘68” this year—and really, why would you?—it’ll be this one.)

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Pretty sad parody. Both High-school kids and Stranger critics are into masturbation. The Stranger's form of masturbation comes with a Bachelor's degree in communications.

Posted by elswinger | August 29, 2008 11:24 PM

Are you able to not write about yourself on here? You aren't why people read Slog. Though I do enjoy what you write, this is a bit much.

Posted by Katie B | August 29, 2008 11:26 PM
If any city is going to “recreate ‘68”

Except, of course, that the conflict at the '68 DNC was about the failure of the Democratic Party to respond to the demands of its base by supporting the anti-war candidate. The conflict at next week's RNC, on the other hand, will focus on the failure of the Republican Party to stop sucking metaphorical/political shit peanuts out of the stiffening rectums of dead rhinos -- which is a metaphor for both the war in Iraq, and the vice presidency of Richard Bruce Cheney.

Also, if cops had forgotten that beating the shit out of protesters in public is a bad idea, WTO certainly reminded them.

But of course, I'm just flinging spitballs here. We'll see how it goes.

Posted by Judah | August 29, 2008 11:39 PM

Is this a picture of you Mssr. Kiley?

Posted by Scott Dow | August 30, 2008 5:52 AM

I wish, Mr. Dow. I wish.

Posted by Brendan Kiley | August 30, 2008 6:45 AM

The heroic police should show no quarter to those terrorist long haired freaks.

I may just go there to help them.


Posted by Lord Basil | August 30, 2008 7:28 AM

I really don't get this one:

kiley’s absolutely correct in everything he points out and he’s made it clear to me why i despise his brand of ‘criticism’ so..

So, you hate the truth then?

Posted by shub-negrorath | August 30, 2008 8:14 AM

@1, don't dis the BA in Communications. According to the GOP, that shit qualifies you to be Vice President!

Posted by meggers | August 30, 2008 8:28 AM

Police Academy '08!

Posted by tomasyalba | August 30, 2008 10:12 AM

Gawd, I was just thinking about how brave and prescient Dan was when he wrote this:

I get all tingly around the prostate just from re-reading it.

And to add to Brendan's excellent comments above. We at The Stranger are assholes who don't give a fuck about anyone or anything but ourselves who I must say we are very pleased with. I mean we are the coolest motherfuckers in Seattle, and the rest of you, and the world, are simply fodder for our amusement. You pathetic motherfuckers.

Posted by Josh | August 30, 2008 10:07 PM

Brendan Kiley

Posted by Josh | August 30, 2008 10:08 PM

#8 I don't. I have one myself.

Posted by elswinger | August 31, 2008 12:22 AM

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