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Thursday, August 21, 2008

High Horses!

posted by on August 21 at 8:50 AM

dumbhorse.jpgHorses are the devil’s creatures. They lie, they whore, they talk trash behind your back. They snack on the innocence of young girls and shit where they please. Horses are the very soul of corruption. This is a fact.

But horses are also drug addicts and filthy Olympics cheaters. Look:

Four horses have been banned from competing in Thursday’s Olympic Games jumping competition for doping, the International Equestrian Federation (FEI) announced here Thursday.

That’s from a story you can find here. It goes on to explain:

The horses - representing Brazil, Germany, Ireland and Norway - had been suspended after testing positive for a prohibited substance, the FEI, which controls the sport, said in a statement.

Oh, horses! Will they ever learn? Dope is for dopes!

RSS icon Comments


I don't know the exact specifics of what happened...however "doping" in the equestrian world is a lot different than in other sports. Many of the banned substances are usually just medications - similiar to human asprin - that can be mistakenly placed in their feed by the grooms.

As long as the FEI has such strict rules, there will always be scandal in showjumping IMHO.

Posted by dkstar | August 21, 2008 9:49 AM

Baseball and softball players aren't good enough for the Olympics any more, but horses are just fine.

Posted by Mike of Renton | August 21, 2008 10:17 AM

Can someone revoke this kid's password or something? Does he realize that people come here and actually read this stuff? Do other authors understand that he brings down their credibility and the rep of Slog as a whole when appearing next to other entries?

What the hell

Posted by Sarah T. | August 21, 2008 10:20 AM

adrian, you mistakenly posted a photo of sarah jessica parker. please fix.

Posted by scary tyler moore | August 21, 2008 10:22 AM


Get the fuck out of our blog, please. Kill yourself. OD on drugs. Whatever. Etc. Just go.

Posted by Mr. Poe | August 21, 2008 10:50 AM

Adrian, I am thrilled that you are willing to say what so many, stifled and silenced by hordes of pimps from Mattel and Lisa Frank, will not or cannot say:

Horses are fucking evil. They're reactionary and brutal, they're dumb as shit and twice as smelly, and they really do eat children--I was nearly eaten by a horse at the age of three, and again at the age of twelve. This is absolutely not an exaggeration.

I'm glad you're outing them for what they are. It comes as absolutely no shock to me that horses are now doping for the Olympics; I'm sure half the thoroughbreds in Kentucky are paying for their posh paddocks with drug money.

Fucking horses.

Posted by Christin | August 21, 2008 10:59 AM

No, Mr. Poe, she's right (@3). I've seen what this Adrian guy posts and it is total trash...didn't you guys run out some chick named Chelsea a couple months back because she was terrible? Yet somehow this hack gets a free pass....I don't get it.

Posted by DevinTON | August 21, 2008 11:16 AM

Actually, Adrian is quite brilliant and has an excellent point. Clearly these horses have been following the bad example of Latawnya.

Posted by leek | August 21, 2008 11:21 AM

Adrian is the very reason I started slogging. Everything else grew from there.

Posted by Mr. Poe | August 21, 2008 11:23 AM

All the more reason to get rid of him.

Posted by Evidence | August 21, 2008 11:29 AM

Horses are, indeed, evil. Evilllllllll, I say! Evilllll!

Posted by Down with Horses | August 21, 2008 11:35 AM

Where's Nancy Reagan when we need her?!?

And what are the Colombians doing about this?

Posted by Original Monique | August 21, 2008 11:57 AM

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