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Wednesday, July 16, 2008

If This is the World’s Greatest Dad, the World’s in Bigger Trouble Than I Ever Feared

posted by on July 16 at 13:35 PM


ABC News introduces the world to Daniel Allen Everett, the 33-year-old Michigan man charged with child sexual abuse and using the Internet to attempt child sexual abuse after allegedly arranging a sex date with what he thought was a 14-year-old girl.

Even worse (or better, depending on how you view things), Everett showed up for the alleged sex date sporting his “World’s Greatest Dad” t-shirt, as seen in the mug shot above.

(Fifty bucks says he’s saving his “That’s not a bald spot—it’s a solar panel for a sex machine!” t-shirt for the trial.)

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The arches on those eyebrows could support the Tacoma Narrows bridge. Hawtness!!!

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | July 16, 2008 1:40 PM

World Wrestling Entertainment really needs to be more careful about handing out endorsements.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | July 16, 2008 1:43 PM

Holy christmas that fucker is creepy!

Posted by Mike in MO | July 16, 2008 1:53 PM

What 14 year old wouldn't want to fuck that? At times I feel sorry for these fuckers, what with the entrapment and the public humiliation on To Catch a Predator. Then, I realize the stupidity and denial it takes to think that a teenager would want to have sex with you when you're that fucking creepy.

Posted by keshmeshi | July 16, 2008 2:14 PM

what's with the chola eyebrows?

Posted by michael strangeways | July 16, 2008 2:19 PM

Why hasn't it sunk into these losers' heads that there are no underage girls on the internet looking for hook-ups with older men? It should be obvious by now tht it is always either a law-enforcement officer or a vigilante at the other end of the conversation. If stupidity were criminal these guys would have been locked up long ago.

Posted by inkweary | July 16, 2008 2:22 PM

I still believe this is a clash of civilisation and instinct. These men display mating instincts that date back millions of years.The young and ripe are irresistible to men who have over powering instincts. That's why, despite what many of us see as an obvious trap, proves simply too compelling.

Posted by Vince | July 16, 2008 2:33 PM

Is that Bill Bavasi?

Posted by DOUG. | July 16, 2008 2:43 PM

He's 33? Same age as Jesus, and way younger than me, and I don't look anywhere near that bad -- though, to be fair, I haven't just been arrested on child molestation charges, which is bound to cause some worry lines.

Posted by Fnarf | July 16, 2008 2:48 PM

"It's not a bald spot- it's a solar panel for a horrible evil heart full of despair and cruelty."
Nope, still not as poignant as the shirt he's already wearing.

Posted by gg | July 16, 2008 3:00 PM


YET fnarf, yet!

Posted by Joh | July 16, 2008 3:04 PM

Gosh. Anyone know how many "using the internet to..." crimes are on the books in any jurisdiction?

Posted by umvue | July 16, 2008 3:05 PM

That shirt's ironic no matter who wears it.

Posted by Mike of Renton | July 16, 2008 3:17 PM

These guys don't "think young girls want to fuck them". They're not particularly interested in what young girls want to do. Young girls, remember, are not free sexual agents; that's why it's against the law to have sex with them. Young girls can sometimes be manipulated into having sex with older men whether they "want to" or not. It works, all too often, and not every naive girl on the internet is an FBI agent. Unfortunately.

Posted by Fnarf | July 16, 2008 4:15 PM

That shirt is satire.

Posted by Bub | July 16, 2008 5:53 PM

He looks like a younger American version of that crazy Austrian, Fritz Finglemiester (or whatever his name was)...

Posted by ellen | July 16, 2008 8:25 PM

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