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Wednesday, June 4, 2008

From the Archives

posted by on June 4 at 17:30 PM


(Originally published in the October 26, 2006 issue of The Stranger, after Obama had visited town for a book signing.)

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obama hot for my momma?

Posted by Jiberish | June 4, 2008 5:31 PM

I'll tell you what I'd enormous whozeewhatsit!!!

Posted by Christopher Frizzelle's Enormous Whozeewhatsit | June 4, 2008 5:35 PM

I'm not a big Obama fan, but was this needed?

Also, he has nice, if big, teeth.

Posted by Wolf | June 4, 2008 5:42 PM

this column alone created obamania at the caucuses.

Posted by max solomon | June 4, 2008 5:56 PM

Ah that fake smile sure conned a lot of people. Come November not that many would be fooled.

Posted by Odrama | June 4, 2008 6:06 PM

We need more black MILFs.

Posted by Sirkowski | June 4, 2008 6:12 PM

I would totally do Obama, but before he did my mamma!

Posted by Cato the Younger Younger | June 4, 2008 6:16 PM

Thank you for reminding me of 3rd grade.

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 4, 2008 6:17 PM

POE! We thought maybe you were in the trunk of a car somewhere.

Posted by w7ngman | June 4, 2008 6:43 PM


I guess you've never been to my former high school.

Posted by MK | June 4, 2008 6:44 PM

Christopher, the word around Capitol Hill is that Josh Feit quit because he couldn't get a promotion. Now Chris, you know something about that, right.

Dan rights about his kid, his plane rides, his licked door knobs, his rides in limos, etc etc. So how can we get the story?

You celebrity has left the stage. Full disclosure, please!

.....Unless Josh was a dickhead and you just wanted him gone.

Posted by Just asking, Chris! er, Christopher! | June 4, 2008 6:46 PM

@5, I'll be gracious in victory if you can be fucking gracious in defeat. For Chrissake.

As for Josh: he was fired because his pet pit bull got caught banging Dan's poodle. There, @11. Happy?

Posted by tsm | June 4, 2008 6:50 PM

Nice. Proud of yourselves? Don't fret: there's more racial stereotypes to be mined between now and November.

Posted by Sh'Nayniquawanda | June 4, 2008 6:57 PM

this is sexist

Posted by mmhmm | June 4, 2008 6:58 PM


Of course it is.

Pro-woman fascist.

(I KID! I KID! as if I can't take a skewering)

The best candidate, like the cream on milk, came to the top. It's up to US to figure that one out.

Although I'm still torn between McCain (republican/leftist) and Obama (democrat/rightist) and I lean towards Obama, although I don't like him.

Still better than McCain.

Posted by Wolf | June 4, 2008 7:14 PM

"McCain (republican/leftist) and Obama (democrat/rightist)"

Were you dropped on your head as a child?

Posted by w7ngman | June 4, 2008 7:20 PM

What next?

"Scrapin' The Bong With Charlie Chong"?

"I'll Have The Frittata By Nick Licata"?

"My Secret Crush On Johnny Rotten By Jean Godden"?

Y'all never did get enough milage out of that riff, IMHO.

Posted by Cookie W. Monster | June 4, 2008 7:29 PM

Were you dropped on your head as a child?

Nope. You, though, apparently were. Who do you back, and who do villify?

McCain leans left to attract the dems. Obama leans right to attract the Republs

What kind of idiot does that take to figure out?

Posted by Wolf | June 4, 2008 7:45 PM

Yeah, McCain is super, super, super leftie.

He's going to double the tax cuts and double the deficit. And he's just hired the guy as his chief aide who believes that there are NO restraints on Presidential power -- "near-dictatorial powers" are the words he used. McCain and his staff vigorously support torture and the obliteration of civil rights. Super, super lefty there, I can see where you're getting that.

Posted by Fnarf | June 4, 2008 7:53 PM

Were you dropped on your head as a child?

Nope. You, though, apparently were. Who do you back, and who do villify?

McCain leans left to attract the dems. Obama leans right to attract the Republcans.

What kind of idiot does that take to figure out?

I'm sorry, I do apologize, some part of the original reply got cut out and I don't have the patience to reconstruct it...but if you want to argue, I will. If not, let's let Obama be the candidate and move on.

Honestly, I'm as tired of campaign bullshit as the rest of you.


Posted by Wolf | June 4, 2008 7:55 PM

I'm alive, and wondering why nobody on the face of the earth is seeding Chausson. I'm pissed. Watch out.

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 4, 2008 8:07 PM

I'm an Obama supporter and I still think this is friggin' hilarious.

So is this:

Posted by Steve | June 4, 2008 8:30 PM

And this, too, come to that.

Posted by Steve | June 4, 2008 8:31 PM

Hey Wolf, do T's ashes lean left or right?

Posted by Wolfpussy | June 4, 2008 9:57 PM

Can you smell what Barack is cookin'?

Posted by Soupytwist | June 4, 2008 10:22 PM

That shit is still hilarious.

Posted by Greg | June 4, 2008 10:38 PM

You have two choices for president:

The first one has one of the longest lines of political experience in history. He is exceedingly popular in congress. He also volunteered to defend the our country in the US Navy.

The second one has no real political experience outside of Illinois. He is tall and lanky with big ears. He even lost a few of his first attempts at gaining political office. He is an excellent speechwriter and orator. He is a good attorney and has a successful law practice.

So which one would you choose?

This is a trick question because both were already Presidents of the United States. The first one is the 15th President of the United States, James Buchannan. He is the President who mired us in the Civil War by declaring the action illegal but doing nothing when the south decided to seceed from the Union. He is largely considered by historians as being the worst President in American history.

He was followed by the other man who became the 16th President of the United States: This man is credited with the end of slavery, the end of the Civil War, and unification of the nation. He became president at a dark time when our country was deeply divided over very polarizing issues. He had no experience in Washington prior to his Presidency. He is widely considered by historians as one of the best Presidents in American History. His name was Abraham Lincoln.

Sound familiar?

Posted by Derek | June 5, 2008 12:53 AM

@19 - Fnarf, once more you show you haven't been paying attention.

McCain is going to - by his own figures - TRIPLE the deficit, not double it.


Posted by Will in Seattle | June 5, 2008 12:58 AM

We still have "Cocaine is great!" up on our fridge. Jesus it's like 7 years old now. Anyway, we have to take it down when our parents visit. We don't even do coke anymore...

Posted by Damien | June 5, 2008 2:03 AM

look at how witty you were, all the way back in 2006. we're so proud of you that we could puke.

(another pointless HEY-LOOK-AT-ME posting. well, you got me--i responded. now kindly shut up about your hurt feelings or fuck off to somebody who cares...)

Posted by duh | June 5, 2008 4:16 AM


I asked. You, apparently, don't rate an answer.

Posted by Wolf | June 5, 2008 4:48 AM

I still prefer the old Stranger article "That's Your Mama by the Dalai Lama".

Posted by johnemack | June 5, 2008 7:17 AM

This was/is more than stoopid.

Posted by Hartiepie | June 5, 2008 8:45 AM

Josh Feit wasn't fired -- not that my saying so will satisfy the nuts. He wanted a break, a change, and so he left the paper. He wasn't pushed.

Posted by Dan Savage | June 5, 2008 9:22 AM

Awesome. I had never heard the Gorillas in the Mist joke, but I will now be propagating it around the globe.

Posted by leek | June 5, 2008 9:23 AM

@34 - so you broke him and took all his change?

harsh, Dan, harsh.

(where did i put the Irony key ...)

Posted by Will in Seattle | June 5, 2008 9:52 AM

I just realized I've fulfilled my lifelong dream of having my very own Personal Internet Stalker.

Unfortunately, he obviously comes from the Special Ed class. My normal luck.

Posted by Wolf | June 5, 2008 4:53 PM

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