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Thursday, June 12, 2008

Attention Capitol Hill Parker

posted by on June 12 at 14:00 PM

CarAlarmCar.JPG

It’s now Day 3 of The Aural Seige of The Stranger Offices (and surrounding environs) thanks to your trigger happy car alarm.

We didn’t leave these notes, but we do concur with the sentimentóminus the threat of damage, of course.

CarAlarmNote1.JPG

CarAlarmNote2.JPG

Also: Why are we not surprised at the mess you’ve made of your interior vehicular life?

CarAlarmCar3.JPG

Please, make it stop.

RSS icon Comments

1

Car alarms should be treated like security false alarms. The first one is free but the next one is a fine. It is noise pollution.
If the system is malfunctioning you can have it towed. That will take care of the problem and send a message at the same time.

Posted by ZanderB@aol.com | June 12, 2008 2:04 PM
2

I'm surprised you guys haven't secretly contacted me. I'm infamous for keying the shit out of cars, ya know.

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 12, 2008 2:07 PM
3

it's an early 90s model Accord EX! I used to have a 91 Accord EX. It wasn't tricked out like this one tho'

I would get a super sensitive alarm if I had fancy faux chrome windshield wipers. Wouldn't want those babies to get swiped.

Posted by pain | June 12, 2008 2:10 PM
4

Assuming that the driver is actually parking this car here each day, here's what you do: Use clear plastic tape to tape your big-ass note to the smack-dab middle of the driver's side of the front windshield so that the driver has to take the time to untape it before he/she can drive off. Tape the hell out of it.

That way you're not doing any damage to the car, but it becomes a pain in the ass for the driver to have to deal with.

Posted by seattle mike | June 12, 2008 2:12 PM
5

Day 3? This thing has been going off every day for quite some time.

Posted by Kim Hayden | June 12, 2008 2:12 PM
6

@1 - Or, it should be legal to break the window so you can pop the hood and disconnect the battery.

I would also recommend breaking a dozen or so eggs on this vehicle. It accomplishes a few things:
1. Vents your anger
2. Inconveniences the owner (who gets to spend LOTS of time scraping dried eggs off of his/her car) about as much as you have been inconvenienced by the noisy alarm.
3. Makes them think twice about parking in that neighborhood ever again.

Posted by Mahtli69 | June 12, 2008 2:13 PM
7

Those windshield wipers tell you everything you need to know about the driver.

Posted by laterite | June 12, 2008 2:14 PM
8

White people will naturally believe that a black person is the owner of this vehicle. They will think this because of the inconsideration, the mess inside, and because it's a Honda with a spoiler. But why would a white person think such a thing? They cannot possibly know whether or not the owner of the vehicle is black. They will assume this anyway because of their racism and because it's convenient for them to assume.

Posted by Sir Charled Mudede | June 12, 2008 2:17 PM
9

aside from auditioning for passive agressive notes dot com. Why have you not called the cops yet? They are just up the street, and its illegal for your car alarm all day like your implying.

SMC 11.31.125 Civil infraction -- Automobile alarm -- Failure to respond.

Posted by meanie | June 12, 2008 2:19 PM
10

call and get that shit towed.

or passive aggressively post on the internet

Posted by bobcat | June 12, 2008 2:20 PM
11

aside from auditioning for passive agressive notes dot com. Why have you not called the cops yet? They are just up the street, and its illegal for your car alarm all day like your implying.

SMC 11.31.125 Civil infraction -- Automobile alarm -- Failure to respond.

Posted by meanie | June 12, 2008 2:21 PM
12

Has it been moved every day or been there for 3 days straight? If it's been there for more than 3 days straight, you can contact the city and report it as abandoned, then they'll eventually tow it.

Posted by jon | June 12, 2008 2:22 PM
13

@8

What? I think my sarcasm meter is off, because if that comment wasn't sarcastic then it was a whole heaping pile of stupid.

Posted by Sir Learnsalot | June 12, 2008 2:43 PM
14

If the car is just there during business hours, the culprit could be a GM Aveda student-- they all get there in the morning and park their cars on that strip every single stinkin' day-- it's one of the few strips of unlimited, free parking in the 'hood. Plus, that mess *looks* like it belongs to a student...

Posted by A neighbor... | June 12, 2008 2:44 PM
15

@8...
??? What ??? Why would white people think it's a black person's car?
I thought Asian or Mexican for sure .. UNTIL I saw the mess, then immediately I thought it was a white person

Posted by Not Racist | June 12, 2008 2:46 PM
16

Could you invoke the same ordinance that causes the cops to show up at a nightclub when sound is audible to a person of normal hearing standing outside? Jesus, it's probably audible to the cops sitting inside their station on 12th.

Posted by flamingbanjo | June 12, 2008 2:51 PM
17

The police usually don't respond unless it's been going for hours (you may have read something in the paper about staff shortages), and this one seems to take breaks every so often. For google's benefit, here's that license plate again: 912-RBX.

Posted by Nat | June 12, 2008 2:54 PM
18

@8 with the exception of your comment, no comments about race were made. here's a thought. read your statement out loud, in front of a mirror then ask yourself who is racist.

Posted by copper | June 12, 2008 2:58 PM
19

Take an a.m. trip down to Costco and buy yourselves a bunch of bulk-quantity duct tape (and some earplugs).

Have yourselves a lunch-time duct-taping party.

Be sure to leave one of those notes on the windshield--that is, if the windshield has managed to remain visible.

Posted by NapoleonXIV | June 12, 2008 3:02 PM
20

Sir Learnsalot, you know very well that your sarcasm meter is not "off". You are white and ignorant of understanding your foul, racist ways.

Let us look at #7.

Those windshield wipers tell you everything you need to know about the driver.

What is this comment trying to say? We know very well what it is trying to say. What we don't know, or fail to remember, is that it is only o.k. to make jest of skin color when that color is white.

Posted by Sir Charled Mudede | June 12, 2008 3:05 PM
21

@8 with the exception of your comment, no comments about race were made. here's a thought. read your statement out loud, in front of a mirror then ask yourself who is racist.

Posted by copper | June 12, 2008 3:09 PM
22

@8 and @20 are parodies of Charles Mudede.  Stop feeding the meta-troll.

Posted by lostboy | June 12, 2008 3:54 PM
23

is it about race or windshield wipers or the alarm? i don't know but seems like someone has a chip on their shoulder.

Posted by copper | June 12, 2008 3:56 PM
24

If Mr. Poe doesn't key it first, I will. I perhaps I'll bash the headlights out.. that's always good for a laugh.
Two wheels good, four wheels bad... baby.

Posted by treacle | June 12, 2008 4:12 PM
25

@8 "Charled", actually, this white person would assume that an asian person owns that car. But hey, I'm willing to be wrong. :)

Posted by treacle | June 12, 2008 4:17 PM
26

At least s/he likes Tim's Cascade Style Potato Chips.

Wasabi flavor = yummy!

Posted by rob | June 12, 2008 4:21 PM
27

Pee on it!

If it's below freezing, the pee freezes on the car!

If it's hot, it'll stink!!

Wait, it seldom freezes here and it's never hot...

never mind.

Posted by michael strangeways | June 12, 2008 4:40 PM
28

Get a portable screwdriver with a drill bit and drill out his tires.

Posted by Fnarf | June 12, 2008 4:59 PM
29

@27: Michael, you beat me to it. I was going to suggest that any dog owner in the vicinity take Fido out for walkies and encourage him/her to leave a little present on the car. You may want to lift the dog on top of the hood or the roof for better coverage. And of course a number two is better so wait until the Alpo has been thoroughly digested.

Posted by RainMan | June 12, 2008 5:05 PM
30

Paint the car to make it look like a giant cell phone. Better to accentuate the annoyingness of it all, y'all.

Posted by Cookie W. Monster | June 12, 2008 5:17 PM
31

1. Insert screwdriver into gap between passenger window and door (through the rubber gasket).
2. Pour a half pint of whole fat milk down the blade of the screwdriver so that it enters the car door's window well.
3. Remove screwdriver and wipe up any spilled milk.
4. Smile and walk away. In several days the car will not be parked there.

Posted by snarky | June 12, 2008 5:31 PM
32

http://publicinformation.seattle.gov/cpi/smc.publicInformation.search.form.vehicle.plate.def is pretty useful for looking up car license plates. If they've been to court you can get a name & address.

Posted by Anon | June 12, 2008 5:38 PM
33

Fake Charles Mudede is the best Slog commenter.

Ever.

Posted by Nick | June 12, 2008 6:02 PM
34

@33 - I think the people who didn't get it are pretty funny too.

Posted by Julie | June 12, 2008 6:38 PM
35

I called city services once on a car alarm that kept going off all night here in Midtown. I was on the phone with the dispatcher when a cement block flew out of nowhere and smashed right through the offending car's windshield.

And that's how we do things in New York.

Posted by Boomer in NYC | June 12, 2008 8:01 PM
36

Maybe stop touching the wipers to leave notes and the alarm will stop going off.

Posted by PA Native | June 12, 2008 8:26 PM
37

i love NYC.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 12, 2008 9:30 PM
38

Begin peeve...

Passive-aggressive does not mean what you people think it means.

End peeve.

Posted by King Rat | June 12, 2008 10:28 PM
39

I seriously doubt whoever owns that car reads slog.

Posted by monkey | June 13, 2008 7:55 AM
40

And ps. by the way, that spoiler is stock.

Posted by monkey | June 13, 2008 7:57 AM
41

@40 - But that antenna is not. And obviously not the wipers.

If it's a white guy, he has a mullet.

Posted by Mahtli69 | June 13, 2008 7:59 AM
42

Used to live up on 15th. One week there was a car alarm that went off repeatedly every night for a few nights in a row. About five days into this, one night the alarm went off and then miraculously began moving further and further away, as if some kind person had thoughtfully removed the car from our neighborhood.

Moral: an alarm that goes off repeatedly magically turns into an advertisement for "free car".

Posted by stan | June 13, 2008 8:22 AM
43

@31 Snarky, you are an evil bastard/genius. I hope I never have to see your dark side.

Ever consider going into politics?

Posted by ay1ene | June 13, 2008 9:47 AM
44

@43
Very perceptive to note the connection to politics.

Posted by snarky | June 13, 2008 1:13 PM

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