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Monday, April 14, 2008

Bird Brains

posted by on April 14 at 11:21 AM

This just in from slogtipper Jrmarkwardt:

2409780816_5e9e077171.jpg

Yep. Someone’s still out there darting pigeons. For more on Seattle’s elusive pigeon hunter, check out news intern Chris Kissel’s post from last week.

(Confidential to the pigeon hunter: man is the most dangerous animal of all!)


Photo via Flickr

RSS icon Comments

1

"But its not against any religion
to want to dispose of a pigeon."
-poisoning pigeons in the park

Posted by Tom Lehrer | April 14, 2008 11:36 AM
2

Think someone is hunting and eating the pigeons? (The ones that didn't survive the darting)

Posted by lorax | April 14, 2008 11:42 AM
3

Let's invent an urban mythical beast for Seattle - our own Chupacabra.

Those mysterious horns you hear at night? That's its cry. It lives in the underground tunnels. It eats junkies and spits out the needles. Want proof? JUST LOOK AT OUR PIGEONS!

Move over Sasquatch.

Posted by JC | April 14, 2008 11:51 AM
4

Un-dead zombie pigeons from hell... Watch out, they want BRAAAAIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 11:52 AM
5

This is sick. Why is this ok? Why is the Stranger treating this with such a light-hearted "har har look at teh funny pidgun" manner? This tongue-in-cheek "notty notty dartblower!" attitude? If this were a gay boi walking around Bellevue you would be frothing at the mouth demanding someone's head. Stand up for the pigeons and I'll stand up for you, but until you do I'll be laughing at the things important to you.

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 11:52 AM
6

fuck! Every time I see a needle pigeon on the slog I shudder. Happy Monday. I hope the shooter runs out of darts.

Posted by squidoo | April 14, 2008 11:53 AM
7

Pigeons are just rats with wings and should be treated just above dogs and children in the grand scheme of things.

Happy hunting!

Posted by Jeff | April 14, 2008 11:56 AM
8

@5: Pigeon = Gay boy. Stunning. That must make you the equivalent to pigeon shit.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 11:56 AM
9

That is not a blowgun dart. That looks like the introducer of an epiduaral catheter or an acupuctue needle. I wonder if someone is illeagally disposing of medical waste and the pigeon got it rummaging around in the trash for food. That would explain how it got stuck in its head.

Posted by inkweary | April 14, 2008 12:01 PM
10

@8: In your world, you'd like to blowdart me wouldn't you? After all, if I'm now just pigeon shit, I'm less than the pigeon, and it was already okay to torture that? See how quickly hypocritical you all are -- on one hand, "Don't discriminate against the gays just because they love the same gender", and then on the other, "Dehumanize and maim/torture/kill the people who disagree"?

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 12:04 PM
11

@10 - I'm amazed that you've managed to turn pigeon hunting in to a gay rights issue.

Posted by Hernandez | April 14, 2008 12:11 PM
12

@7 Pigeons are indeed RATS with wings.

Happy Hunting I say!

We should have teams of blow dart leagues helping rid our city of these vermin!

Posted by Reality Check | April 14, 2008 12:14 PM
13

@5, 10 Does not necessarily represent the views and opinions of other (any other) people who are concerned with animal rights. "sick" is an idiot and an asshole. Thanks for giving animal rights activists a bad name and undermining the work we do.

Posted by cmaceachen | April 14, 2008 12:14 PM
14

@13, typical "animal rights activist" -- only save the cute ones, yeah? Pandas and polar bears oh my, but the pigeons? Not cute enough to prevent the torture of!

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 12:18 PM
15

Animal rights whackos are the closest thing we have to legal morons running around outside of rubber rooms.

@13 if you truly are a "animal rights activist" I pity you. My condolensces.

People Eating Tasty Animals is a lunatic fringe organization who's very erratic terroristic behaviors have placed it into an elite eco-terrorist tier of whack jobs. Mainstream society outside of your little touchy feely blue parts of the country have come to realize that your very existence is a scab on society.

No amount of "good PR" will ever be able to drag the public's perceptions to where you'd like to see them. The silly little "demonstrations" you hold make your cause look foolish and pathetic.

That just about sums up my initial brief feelings on the subject.

Posted by Reality Check | April 14, 2008 12:21 PM
16

if crazy fucks would stop feeding the fucking flying rats buckets of dog food & bread crumbs they wouldn't need to be hunted.

health department, i'm looking at YOU. give the crazy fucks jobs at the zoo.

Posted by max solomon | April 14, 2008 12:24 PM
17

@13: I think "sick" is a troll, but in the event you're not:

@14: Pigeons spread disease like rats. Your argument is the philosophical equivalent of saying we should save germs and viruses.

Also, the last time I checked, pigeons were not endangered.

Posted by Dawgson | April 14, 2008 12:24 PM
18

@17 yes I am trolling for fun and profit, but you still missed my trollish point - nowhere have I stood against the humane eradication of pigeons in urban areas - merely the inhumane maiming of blowdarted pigeons. First they came for the pigeons ...

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 12:28 PM
19

@17 Furthermore, if you really believe that pigeons are such a threat to urban society, you would be standing with me against the blowdarting of said pigeons! Wouldn't waiting for them to die from infection, starvation, or other blowdart-caused effects, leaving them to rot unattended in the eaves of your urban condo, be worse than letting them live or be captured, euthanized, and safely disposed of? I think we've found common ground here, pigeon-shit-troll and blog elite together at last!

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 12:42 PM
20

The Stranger and Seattle's Blowdarted Pigeons: A Rough Chronology

Two weeks ago in Last Days, I featured an eyewitness report of a downtown pigeon with a syringe through its head. In the world of Last Days, junkie pigeons are news.

But then it turned out the pigeon wasn't pierced with a syringe but a blow dart, and it wasn't just one blow-darted pigeon but a whole bunch, at which point the story moved the Stranger news section. Who the hell was blow-darting Seattle's pigeons?

Today brings the highest-quality photo yet of a blow-dart pigeon, featured here on Slog. Nowhere in this chain of events does The Stranger condone or encourage the blow-darting of pigeons.

Yes, they may be rats with wings, but still: people should be spending their time doing something other than blow-darting rats with wings. Read a book or something.

In other news, who knew PETA was such a contentious organization?


Posted by David Schmader | April 14, 2008 12:47 PM
21

Ugh. PETA is dogshit. If you love animals, give money to the SPCA, which actually spends money on animals, not advertising.

Posted by F | April 14, 2008 12:51 PM
22

I was JUST THINKING about this story. It's so morbidly fascinating.

Posted by Katelyn | April 14, 2008 1:00 PM
23

@19: No condo here... I just lived in New York long enough to acquire a healthy fear of pigeons. I don't think anyone should take pigeon death into their own hands.

Honestly, I assumed it was a city program but I guess not.

Posted by Dawgson | April 14, 2008 1:01 PM
24

@13
My quarrel is with your comments regarding gays, but of course if I disagree with one of your points, I must disagree with them all, right? How very republican of you.

And you go on to say they should all be captured and euthanized? How very... I dunno, childish of you? Capture how many millions of pigeons and kill them all? And then of course they come right back. This is a city. Pigeons have lived in cities for thousands of years. Neither your plan nor blow-dart-idiot's plan will change that. Stop feeding them like 16 said, and stop throwing trash on the ground for them to pick at and you might make a dent.

I agree that slog is taking this too lightly. This is cruelty, whether you like pigeons or not. And this whole disease spreading thing is BS. When was the last time someone got sick from a pigeon?

Posted by cmaceachen | April 14, 2008 1:09 PM
25

dear stranger,

please stop giving the mysterious person with the blow dart gun the attention s/he is seeking.

thank you.

Posted by joe | April 14, 2008 1:20 PM
26

Sick: People and animals are no more equivalent than people and fetuses. That is why people have rights and animals and fetuses do not. How a person treats an animal or a fetus is a moral issue between that person and what ever god he may or may not believe in.

And no, I don't want to blow dart you.

Who the hell would bother to blow dart pigeon shit?

No, my regard for you ends with avoiding you as you rain down from above (and then trying not step in you).

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 1:27 PM
27

don't feed pigeons OR trolls.

Posted by singingcynic | April 14, 2008 1:32 PM
28

Besides, How can we know that's not just the pigeon equivalent to an afro-pick? Maybe all the home boy pigeons are fronting them these days.... (Why is the stranger so culturally insensitive?)

Personally, I'm waiting for Chuck Mudede to weigh in (Please try to find a pigeon with a pige-pick AND huge boobs so we can hear from him.)

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 1:36 PM
29

@26: Only some people have some rights in some societies. There are plenty of societies that deny some people all rights, and some people some rights. There are plenty of people who deny other people rights when given power to do so. There are no inherent rights granted to or realized by you as a human for virtue of being human. All rights are moral issues, be they between humans and humans or humans and animals.

The end result in this case might be "don't maim/torture", regardless of the DNA of the torturer or torturee. Tell me why the DNA of involved parties alters the morality.

Posted by sick | April 14, 2008 1:56 PM
30

So what would be so great about torturing rats, anyway?

I guess it wouldn't cause me the slightest personal harm if somebody was hurting rats, or pigeons, or gays. Not my problem, unless I happen to have compassion for the suffering of others.

The fact is that people who torture animals will eventually move on to child abuse and spousal abuse. It doesn't matter whether you're inflicting suffering on a person or animal. If you can stomach causing pain, and even start to enjoy it, then you're dangerous, and society has a right to be protected from you.

This kind of thing doesn't happen in a vacuum. Dude-buds like You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me and Reality Check were without a doubt abused terribly in the past, and this is what we get from that. The point is that we can break the cycle if we are willing to do something rather than just laugh it off.

Posted by elenchos | April 14, 2008 1:58 PM
31

Thanks, #20.

I thought it odd that a junkie would have good enough aim to hit a pigeon in t6he head with a syringe and make it stick.

Posted by NapoleonXIV | April 14, 2008 2:03 PM
32

@29: Actually, I hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

I agree with Jefferson and Franklin that human rights are universal and derived from natural law. You just point out the obvious, that not all governments acknowledge all rights of all men. That, however, does not lead logically to an argument that all creatures possessing DNA have the same natural rights.

@17 is right, You argue for the philosophical equivalent of endowing germs and viruses with the same rights as persons.

You, clearly, are wrong. (And do your cause a huge disservice by over playing your hand to the point of being absurd.) Get some protein in you diet. I think you may be brain addled by its lack.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 2:26 PM
33

When I lived on 15th I really wanted to feed the ones at Walgreen's rat poison... I really really wanted to do that

Posted by Andrew | April 14, 2008 2:30 PM
34

I don't personally think of pigeons as rats with wings. I think they're another amazing life form, able to get by day to day. Their close association with humans (are they perhaps the dogs of the sky?) goes back thousands of years. Pigeons are a rarity in that have stable populations in the urbanized realm of human habitat.

Needless to say that I have compassion for a pigeon with a dart in its head.


http://www.birdweb.org/birdweb/bird_details.aspx?id=234

http://urbpan.livejournal.com/191664.html

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | April 14, 2008 2:42 PM
35

@32

Jefferson and Franklin were not trying to give you a Bible with instructions on how to do every little thing in your life. They just needed to get a government working, and they hardly had time to state the obvious fact that a healthy human being takes no pleasure in causing or tolerating useless suffering.

Posted by elenchos | April 14, 2008 2:44 PM
36

@26,

In this society, animals do have rights. There are laws against animal cruelty and the blow dartist (darter?) is clearly breaking those laws.

And #16 is right. Keep the bums from feeding the fucking birds and much of this problem goes away.

I also don't understand why people have more animosity for pigeons than crows. Crows are noisy and annoying. Pigeons are quiet and, unlike actual rats, they don't live in the sewers and feed on shit.

Posted by keshmeshi | April 14, 2008 3:00 PM
37

That's advanced evolution right there.

Think a human could go out for lunch with a dart through their head like nothing's wrong?

The human race will be long gone, but the Earth will still have those fucking pigeons.

Posted by Mahtli69 | April 14, 2008 3:20 PM
38

There's a huuuuuuuge difference between population control and/or extermination and needless torture or infliction of completely unnecessary pain on any living being (human or otherwise).

Lame. Shame on you.

Posted by Nay | April 14, 2008 3:51 PM
39

@35

Granted (and agreed) that Jefferson and Franklin were not trying to give us a Bible with instructions on how to do every little thing in your life. (I'm searching in vain for where I made this assertion... Please point it out and I will retract it immediately.) But you are grossly mistaken in claiming that the Declaration Of Independence was intended to "get a government working" in short order. (They already had functioning Colonial Governments... they were simply throwing off political ties with the British Crown to become independent States. A little remedial American History may help you through your confusion here.)

That said, even if man does (arguably) have a personal responsibility under natural law to be a good steward of his resources, including the flora and fauna of the earth, (which I agree is true), that personal (possibly moral) responsibility does not translate to a right enjoyed by those resources. To say man’s personal responsibility (one born by virtue of man's rights) creates a correspondent right inherent to its subjects would in its very nature create the same but reverse responsibility as incumbent upon those subjects to man by nature of possessing those same natural rights.

Man has natural rights and therefore certain personal and moral responsibilities while lesser creatures have no natural rights and therefore no personal or moral responsibilities.

Being the beneficiary of moral responsibilities does not grant an organism natural rights unless it has (or would typically be expected to grow to have) the capacity to accept the moral responsibilities incumbent upon those rights.

Nothing can have rights without responsibilities and nothing that can not bear (or be expected to bear) responsibility can have rights.

To abdicate personal responsibility by inventing animal rights is a lazy, immoral and dishonest maneuver that comes naturally to a society that has no sense of personal or moral responsibility but has not yet fully managed to un-burden it self of the intrinsic compassion that qualifies it to be endowed with certain natural rights.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 4:05 PM
40

@36: Don't be obtuse. Protection by law does not create a right. Wet lands are protected by law, but they do not have any rights because they are no more capable of exercising them, or bearing the responsibilities that accompany them, than a pigeon is.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 4:13 PM
41

@36: There are also laws against fucking pick nick tables... Do pick nick tables now have rights also?

Geesh. (Engage brain and apply logic please.)

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 4:16 PM
42

Look, every state and most cities and towns in America have banned animal cruelty, even to rats and pigeons. And the Supreme court has upheld these laws. They know the US Constitution better than you. No really, they know better.

These laws were not passed based on the rights of animals. They were passed because everyone believes that wanton cruely is depraved. They were not outlawing animal suffering. They were outlawing animal torturers. See? It's not the pain of the animals itself that society rejects. It's you, Mr. Kidding_Me. It's people who like to see pain that we have laws against, because animal torturers are not welcome to be members of our civilization. We prefer them to be incarcerated.

This is bothering you so much because it is bringing out the past abuse you have repressed. It's that pain that you need to be working through; your own pain is what make you enjoy seeing birds suffer. Granted, modern talking therapy isn't a whole lot better at helping you work through this trauma than it was 100 years ago, but there are a wide range of new drugs that can control your feelings of anger and shame that drive you to react this way. Do you have insurance?

Posted by elenchos | April 14, 2008 4:37 PM
43

@41,

It's picnic. Moron.

And there is a presumption that, since animals are capable of suffering, we have a responsibility not to inflict undue suffering onto them. A "pick nick" table can't feel pain.

Posted by keshmeshi | April 14, 2008 4:39 PM
44

@41,

Additionally, it's not illegal to fuck a "pick nick" table. It is, however, illegal to expose your junk and commit sexual acts in public.

Posted by keshmeshi | April 14, 2008 4:40 PM
45

God animal torture is HILARIOUS!!! You've got to have a really great sense of humor to get how funny it is to see animals in pain.

Posted by Jesus H. Christ | April 14, 2008 4:50 PM
46

I expect to be credited each and every time someone uses the term "rats with wings" or variations thereof.

I thought it up. I published it in the comments last week.

At least site the source you dicks.

Posted by ecce homo | April 14, 2008 5:01 PM
47

Only kidding!

p.s. Sorry I'm a total douche.

Posted by ecce homo | April 14, 2008 5:07 PM
48

Animal cruelty is definitely wrong. Pigeon population control or strict laws against feeding them might be good.

Posted by Dawgson | April 14, 2008 5:38 PM
49

I hate the way pigeons are always darting around.

Posted by Bob | April 14, 2008 6:26 PM
50

@42

You tard. Show me where I have advocated for treating animals cruelly. Show me where I have professed to enjoy treating animals cruelly. In fact, I have laid out a clear argument that we have a personal and moral obligation to be responsible in our treatment of animals. All I have argued is that we must treat animals responsibly because we have a responsibility to do so not because they have a right to be treated so. It's an important distinction. (And for the record, the most abuse I have been victim to is the drivel posted by genetic recessives like you on posts like this.)

@43

What the fuck do you think I have been saying?... Your right sweetie pie we do have a "responsibility" to treat animals ethically (as opposed to animals having the "right" to be treated ethically). I know this is hard for you to wrap your pretty little head around but let me try one more time.

People have rights

Things that have rights must also have responsibilities.

Animals do not have rights or responsibilities.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:02 PM
51

Well, both 43 and that pigeon have a point.

Posted by Bob | April 14, 2008 7:20 PM
52

@42

Also, where the hell did I ever deny that we have laws against cruelty to animals or question their legal validity?

You obtuse ignoramus.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:25 PM
53

#47 is a sockpuppet,

Please delete Kesh's attempts at being me.

Thank you.

Posted by ecce homo | April 14, 2008 7:26 PM
54

Must suck to be a pigeon in Seattle. I mean just trying to chill and find popcorn to eat and soak up some rays, I bet the last thing to go through that pigeon's head was a blow dart.

Posted by Bob | April 14, 2008 7:28 PM
55

@42

Also, where the hell did I ever deny that we have laws against cruelty to animals or question their legal validity?

You obtuse ignoramus.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:29 PM
56

@42

Also, where the hell did I ever deny that we have laws against cruelty to animals or question their legal validity?

You obtuse ignoramus.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:32 PM
57

@42

Also, where the hell did I ever deny that we have laws against cruelty to animals or question their legal validity?

You obtuse ignoramus.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:35 PM
58

Please Pardon the multiple posts. My PDA is an obtuse ignoramus also...

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:41 PM
59

@42

Also, where the hell did I ever deny that we have laws against cruelty to animals or question their legal validity?

You obtuse ignoramus.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:45 PM
60

Okay... now I suspect these multiple posts are the result of foul play....

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 7:54 PM
61

I thought you were just needling us.

Posted by Bob | April 14, 2008 8:02 PM
62

LOL Bob... You're a funny guy. And that's sexy. I'd blow your dart anytime....

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 14, 2008 8:09 PM
63

@50,

Show me where I said that you advocate causing animals pain. Our society has determined that animals have a right not to suffer undue pain at the hands of humans. What other justification is there for outlawing inhumane treatment of animals?

Speaking of ignoramuses -- and genetic recessives.

Posted by keshmeshi | April 14, 2008 11:43 PM
64

Good shit keshmeshi. Are you really that stupid? The comment you are responding to, regarding causing pain to animals, was directed at elenchos (thus the "@42").
You are obviously to mentally deficient to grasp the difference between being endowed with a "right" and being the just beneficiary of someone else's responsibility.

If you did not suffer from what I can at this point only assume must be sever mental retardation (or female hysteria) you would be capable of understanding that while society has determined that it has a responsibility to prevent animals from suffering undue pain at the hands of humans, this does not imply that animals have rights, merely that society desires that society, and its members, have a responsibility. One does not beget the other you simp.

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 15, 2008 2:24 AM
65

Now, go away little girl. (You are only enforcing my belief that to have a vagina must indeed be a sever mental disability.)

Posted by You_Gotta_Be_Kidding_Me | April 15, 2008 2:33 AM
66

@64 (and about a dozen other of YGBKM posts...)

i hope english is your second language.

Posted by el | April 15, 2008 8:39 AM

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