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Monday, March 10, 2008

Mommas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Marry Politicians

posted by on March 10 at 13:15 PM




UPDATE: Whoops, I left someone out…


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You forgot Vitter...

Posted by thehim | March 10, 2008 1:27 PM

great post.

Posted by infrequent | March 10, 2008 1:27 PM

The thing that is hard for me to understand is the decision making of people that are elected to do things that they know will hurt their careers. Do they just think they wont get caught?

Posted by Bellevue Ave | March 10, 2008 1:27 PM

Yeah, I know the reasons behind those press conferences and even why the wives agree to do them... but ugh. It's such a display of subservience in some ways.

Posted by leek | March 10, 2008 1:29 PM

And what's up with the need to hire, or give kushy state jobs, for sex? I'd have done two out of three for free.

Posted by bohica | March 10, 2008 1:29 PM

And if your babies do grow up to marry politicians, make sure they have a nice light-blue outfit in their wardrobe.

Posted by Ariel | March 10, 2008 1:31 PM

I would DRAIN Mc. I mean, come on. Growl.

His "wife" can watch.

Posted by Mr. Poe | March 10, 2008 1:34 PM

Don't let your daughters marry politicians. Sons can marry politicians and not worry about a thing.

Posted by correction | March 10, 2008 1:35 PM

No female politicians announcing their roles in sex scandals with their husbands standing dutifully, quietly behind them like a prop?

Posted by bma | March 10, 2008 1:39 PM

I love the look on Spitzer's wife's face though. The I-wonder-how-much-half-his-estate-is-worth face.

Posted by kyleen | March 10, 2008 1:44 PM

Seriously, why don't they freaking legalize prostitution already? It would certainly benefit them, since they all seem to frequent prostitutes so much....

Posted by arduous | March 10, 2008 1:49 PM

all the women are wearing baby blue jackets in those pics.

Posted by observer | March 10, 2008 1:56 PM

@3 - I'd guess that people inclined to the political sphere would be more generally inclined to risk-taking.

Besides, I suspect many of them don't get caught. You think we here about every public official who hires a prostitute or has an affair?

Posted by tsm | March 10, 2008 1:58 PM

"here" --> "hear"

Posted by tsm | March 10, 2008 1:59 PM

That sucks. Spitzer was going to be a damn good president someday. I'll bet he was set up by that asshole in the state state senate, Bruno.

Posted by Fnarf | March 10, 2008 2:00 PM

Damn, Spitzer's wife is a fOX! She's got that cougar aged-to-perfection sexy written all over her.

Only problem is her name- "Silda"? Seriously?

I think this could have all been avoided if she'd had a name like "Lexus" or "Jasmin"... something a little more whorish.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | March 10, 2008 2:01 PM

You missed the McCain one with the carefully calculated placement of his wife giving him the evil eye in dark makeup.

Posted by Colton | March 10, 2008 2:05 PM

tsm, it is taking a risk that isn't necessary and has a potential downside that is huge. it seems like the first class every politician should take is some kind of rudimentary sexual self exploration so that they dont feel compelled to fuck hookers at the peril to everything theyve worked for.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | March 10, 2008 2:09 PM

Blue for the ladies and red with white striped ties for guys 'cept Larry.

Posted by McG | March 10, 2008 2:10 PM

Do they just think they wont get caught?

Uh, no one does illicit shit thinking they will get caught.

Posted by Mike in MO | March 10, 2008 2:10 PM

Why no picure of Bill "I have sinned" Clinton and his stand-by-your-man wife?

Posted by David Wright | March 10, 2008 2:11 PM

@21, my guess is because Bill didn't PAY Monica....

Posted by arduous | March 10, 2008 2:14 PM

@18 - well, obviously, but you might as well ask why people can't resist gambling when the odds always favor the house. Some people are just wired that way.

Posted by tsm | March 10, 2008 2:17 PM

story of my life: the only one of these guys that I find even remotely attractive, is the straight one...

Posted by michael strangeways | March 10, 2008 2:28 PM

Maybe FNARF, maybe he would have made a great president, but I find him to be a hypocrite, not because he was "banging cocktail waitressess two at a time", thats of course his business, but because his career is built on of breaking up organized crime rings. i wonder how many organized crime madams got a pass? he is just as bad as wide stance in hypocrisy.

isnt he a super HRC delegate?

Posted by SeMe | March 10, 2008 2:30 PM

I admire your restraint, Dan, for not including a photo of Hillary holding hands with Bill during the Gennifer-Flowers-Mea-Culpa on 60 Miutes back in '92.

Posted by Andy Niable | March 10, 2008 2:33 PM

Hey, at least Bill didn't pay for it . . . that I'm aware of.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty | March 10, 2008 2:42 PM

Baby blue is the new black.

Posted by Mahtli69 | March 10, 2008 2:49 PM

That Spitzer, he ugly.

Posted by Bub | March 10, 2008 2:56 PM

"why do people in these positions take such risks?"

People in powerful positions also tend to not be aware that their behaviors are noticed by others. These people really do think they won't get caught, or that even if there's evidence out there, it will never be connected to them.

Posted by GS | March 10, 2008 3:03 PM

so basically it is like playing russian roulette with your career over having sex because you are too arrogant to believe it will bite you in the ass.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | March 10, 2008 3:11 PM

there are probably different reasons for this sort of risk-taking behavior. the risk factor might be enjoyable to some -- the greater the risk the greater the reward. maybe he's just always done it, and didn't/couldn't stop as his position in politics improved. maybe he's in an open relationship.

we often criticize the church for placing impossible standards on their congregations. when the faithful cannot live up to the standard, they become more deviant, and more secretive.

well, the public treats politicians like the clergy treats the layperson. we expect them to hold a higher standard, and to resign if caught. we make them take a vow of celibacy and are strangely surprised when they don't keep the oath we couldn't either.

not that all of us are having affairs with prostitutes while battling organized crime.

Posted by infrequent | March 10, 2008 3:27 PM

I agree, and people shouldn't be surprised that politicians have sex with prostitutes, they're just as human as anyone else.

I think in these cases it's the hypocrisy that people are truly upset with. Spitzer, for example, was very "holier than thou" about crime and now it's come right back to him. We should at least hold him to his OWN high standards.

Posted by GS | March 10, 2008 3:34 PM

Whoops -- Vitter added.

Posted by Dan Savage | March 10, 2008 3:44 PM

People in powerful positions go to prostitutes because their high profile prevents them from having normal affairs like everyone else. Could a Governor go out on a secret dinner date with a mistress? No.

Posted by Mahtli69 | March 10, 2008 3:48 PM

Who was that guy that tried to get his wife to have sex with a stranger in a strip club?

Posted by w7ngman | March 10, 2008 3:51 PM


That would be Jack Ryan, Senate candidate from Illinois and husband of Jeri Ryan (7 of 9). He would have faced Obama if he hadn't dropped out of the race.

Dan, how about our own Richard Curtis?

Posted by elrider | March 10, 2008 4:05 PM

Oh, w7ngman, how soon you forget! How did you think Obama had such a cakewalk to the Senate in the first place?

Posted by kk | March 10, 2008 4:08 PM

@38, affirmative action?

Ok, I got it wrong, he just wanted other people to watch them.

Dude is crazy though, if 7 of 9 were my wife I'd keep her all to myself.

Posted by w7ngman | March 10, 2008 4:14 PM

Richard Curtis didn't hold a presser with his wife. Neither did Florida's Bob Allen -- or Bill Clinton. Hillary wasn't by his side for that "I did not have sex with that woman" presser. She was off in the East Wing, baking cookies and hosting teas, I think.

Posted by Dan Savage | March 10, 2008 4:19 PM

Cookies. Yeah, I forgot about that - is she counting that as "diplomatic experience"?

I wonder if I can claim all those childhood years making dinner for the family as "diplomatic experience" ... then I'd be more qualified than Hils ...

Posted by Will in Seattle | March 10, 2008 4:22 PM

it isnt even that infrequent. I am always amazed that anyone in the celebrity limelight, with so much to lose from stupid behavior, that seems well within their control, does something that they have to know will impact their career negatively. all because they dont think they will get caught doing it.

i ask again; how hard is it to not do something that will end your career?

Posted by Bellevue Ave | March 10, 2008 4:29 PM

like michael vick. how hard is it not to run a dog fighting ring?

Posted by Bellevue Ave | March 10, 2008 4:39 PM

dan, hillary made it quite clear that she's not the cookie baking type of political wife back in 92 when she said she wasn't a Tammy Wynette "Stand by your Man" type of wife on 60 Minutes, which then pissed the hell out of Tammy Wynette...

Posted by michael strangeways | March 10, 2008 4:46 PM

Bellevue Ave - how hard is it for people to not do something that will end up with a life-long prison sentence or death sentence? But it happens all too often.
It may be that celebrities or politicians are very, very careful the first few times they do something career-destroying, but if it works, they get relaxed and comfortable and don't take the same precautions? I mean, Larry Craig probably had tons of sex with other men, probably even cruised the public restrooms for it, before he got too comfortable and ended up soliciting a cop.

Posted by GS | March 10, 2008 4:51 PM

I love how the guys in the first and fourth pictures have basically the exact same expression on their face.

Posted by w7ngman | March 10, 2008 4:53 PM

One more from Detroit:

"Speaking at length about the text-message scandal for the first time publicly Wednesday night, as he held hands with his wife Carlita, Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick apologized repeatedly to residents, supporters, opponents, his wife and his sons for what he called "the embarrassment and disappointment" of the past few days."

- Kwame Kilpatrick: A mayor in crisis

Posted by JR | March 10, 2008 4:54 PM

I'm actually more than a little repulsed by the media attention this non-story is getting. And Dan Savage jumping on the bandwagon? Cone on Dan - you throwing stones at this man's glass house?

Near as I can tell, what the guy did *wrong* was that he didn't just decide to pay for sex, he didn't just decide to do it via a call-girl, no. He had the bad judgment to do it with a vastly over-priced call girl so as to actually draw attention to it.

I hope that girl could suck the batteries out of a flashlight, squirt G spot ejaculate in an 7' arc across the room with a flex of her Kegals and rimmed like she had a Ph.D in rimmology with a tongue that could reach his prostate.

$5500?? There is no hooker worth that kind of money. And, as is demonstrable, no sex experience worth this level of humiliation.

What is it with Americans that would seize upon this to ruin a man over this? Why? Why the hell would that be good journalism - good law enforcement and a decent use of the taxpayer's dollar or the public's time?

Seriously. There's just something wrong with you people.

Posted by onseconthought | March 10, 2008 8:47 PM

From the "one of these things is not like the other" department ...

All of those guys look like they just ate a shit sandwich, except for Larry Craig. You've got to give him credit for maintaining his cool through the whole ordeal. He's got plausible deniability down to an art form. And, he unresigned. The balls!

Posted by Mahtli69 | March 10, 2008 8:58 PM

48, it's the hypocrisy of it all. remember, he made a big deal of cracking down on prostitution?

Posted by ellarosa | March 10, 2008 10:21 PM

news only for the jaded and bored

legal or illegal- viva whores and johns

viva sex - hey Dan, what happened here, why would any sex healthy and rational person give a hoot about adventures with a sex worker?? Sensationalizing is still just that.

Legalize, tax, open many brothels across the land, live longer with less tension via more good sex.

And I am glad I know now why it cost so much - long tongue reaching the prostate for half hour or so just might be worth 5,000. Just a few minutes of that in fucking is a trip to heaven, for those of you who guard your butts with misguided puritan vigor.

By the way, Idaho likes Obama, and most likely Larry Craig broke down a lot of barriers in that state. I wish he would change parties and stay in office.

Posted by Larkin | March 10, 2008 10:43 PM

Where's the photo of Bill and Hilary?

Posted by Chris | March 11, 2008 10:17 PM

Gay agenda tactic:

"See, marriage isn't so sacred or even viable, therefore we should be able to do it too."

Posted by Matt Sanchez | March 11, 2008 11:18 PM

At least Bill had the brains to go for it without paying. No paper trail. And no wiretaps. Call someone up to your hotel room, drop your pants, and see if she bites, or sucks as is the case.

Seriously, hasn't he heard of craigslist? dumbass.

Posted by hal | March 12, 2008 4:48 PM

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