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Friday, February 1, 2008

Killer Cakes, Expanding Doughnuts

posted by on February 1 at 12:01 PM


Starting today and continuing through Valentine’s Day, Seattle’s Cupcake Royale is offering the Deathcake Royale, featuring “layers of single-origin chocolate decadence, espresso ganache, and [Cupcake Royale’s] own chocolate-cake deluxe, drizzled with rich chocolate ganache” to create “Seattle’s most lovingly lethal cupcake.”

Last week, Cupcake Royale dropped off a couple sample Deathcakes, and they sufficed—deliciously—for the whole, hoggish editorial office. One or two bites is all any normal person can expect to take of a Deathcake—which isn’t really a cupcake, but a small, dense cube. If you like schmancy chocolate explosions, you have two weeks to get one. (Confidential to lawyers reading Slog: Does explicitly labeling the product a “deathcake” inoculate Cupcake Royale against lawsuits if someone actually dies eating one?)

In other dessert news: Seattle’s Top Pot Doughnuts will soon be available nationwide, thanks to the beneficent hand of Starbucks. The Seattle Times has the full story here.

UPDATE: Whoops, Brad already posted the Top Pot news below. But since it’s generating discussion in both posts, I shall leave it up. (The internet can expand to hold as much doughnut-related discussion as necessary…)

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Yes it does absolve you of liability, thus you should label all the bombs you mail to your enemies as "death-packages"

Posted by vooodooo84 | February 1, 2008 12:12 PM

They've been selling top pots in SF for years.

Posted by Andrew | February 1, 2008 12:13 PM

I was pretty sure that Top Pot was already available nationwide. Over the holidays, I was visiting family in Roswell, NM and was practically jizzing with joy to get some Top Pot donuts. And believe me, Roswell is among the last places to get anything. My mom was fucking excited about the fact that a Chili's opened up.

Posted by Gitai | February 1, 2008 12:14 PM

According to the report, Top Pot doughnuts have previously been available in 25 states, and now they'll be available in all 50.

Posted by David Schmader | February 1, 2008 12:16 PM

It all depends on whether or not there's a disclaimer printed on the cupcake liner, and if so, whether or not it's on the baked side, or the exterior side.

Posted by NapoleonXIV | February 1, 2008 12:26 PM
6 I'm hoping that the Deathcake cupcake is an improvement over Cupcake Royale's usual dry cupcakes with greasy frosting?

(and it's pronounced "gree-zee" where I come from...they also say "Wor-sheen-ton" for the state we live in...)

Posted by michael strangeways | February 1, 2008 12:28 PM

Cupcake Royale is like eating ass-boogers once you've experienced Trophy Cupcakes.

Posted by seattle98104 | February 1, 2008 12:54 PM

There's about a dozen Deathcakes stacked up right now at the West Seattle location as I type. No preorder needed.

Posted by JMR | February 1, 2008 1:01 PM

michael strangeways @ 6 - are you from missour-uh?

Posted by showme | February 1, 2008 1:12 PM

close...I'm from Falls City, Nebraska the town that killed Brandon's 5 miles from the Kansas border and 9 miles from the Missouri River/border.

It's a FABULOUS place.

and yes, it is pernounced "Muh-Zur-Uh"

Posted by michael strangeways | February 1, 2008 1:43 PM

Cupcakes suck. Full stop.

If you want chocolate, why don't you eat chocolate? Cake isn't chocolate no matter how dense you make it.

Gitcherself a bar of Domori 70% single-estate goodness.

Posted by Fnarf | February 1, 2008 5:36 PM

Fnarf you ignorant slut. GOOD chocolate cake is one of the greatest things in life. Not so good chocolate cake is torture. Your momma must not know how to bake.

As for Cupcake Royale, did they put all the moistness missing from their other cupcakes the rest of the year into this one for a limited time only?

As for Top Pot, what's not to love, but making donuts isn't exactly hard, not like chocolate cake hard.

Posted by tssk at Fnarf | February 1, 2008 6:29 PM

Cake is evil. Cake is the baked embodiment of evil. My momma wasn't the greatest baker, but I've had the best, and it was horrible. I'd rather suck pus out of Dick Cheney's festering chest wound than look at a picture of the best cake ever made.

I like pie.

Posted by Fnarf | February 1, 2008 6:33 PM

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