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Thursday, October 11, 2007

O They Will Know We Are Conservative Christians By…

posted by on October 11 at 15:21 PM

pedophile clowns.

An Illinois man who worked as a “Christian clown” named Klutzo was arrested yesterday on child pornography charges for allegedly taking naked photographs of young boys at a Philippines orphanage…. Regarding the naked photos of young boys, Carlock explained, “That’s how they live.” Three of the boys seen in the photos told investigators they woke up to find Carlock fondling and caressing them. On his web site, Carlock (who has worked with his wife, a fellow clown) describes himself as a Christian clown who performs at parties, picnics, vacation Bible school, children’s church. Carlock told investigators that he previously traveled to the House of Joy in 2004 and visited a Mexican orphanage in 2002. He also reported being an ordained minister who has been involved in pastoral ministry, Christian education and camping, and evangelism since 1967.

There’s video of the Christian clown at work up at TheSmokingGun. Thanks to Slog tipper Griffith.

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I'm sorry, I've lost track - how many is that this week?

Posted by Will in Seattle | October 11, 2007 3:28 PM

so how do you get blood out of a clown suit?

Posted by k | October 11, 2007 3:34 PM

If the kids didn't want it they should have pulled the duct tape off their mouths and said something.

Posted by monkey | October 11, 2007 3:36 PM


Just out of curiosity, how did you know my full name is Griffith..?

Posted by Hot Tipper Griff | October 11, 2007 3:51 PM

Your email?

Posted by Dan Savage | October 11, 2007 3:58 PM

Sorry, I almost never use my full name. Didn't think I had. Nevermind.

Posted by HOT Tipper Griff | October 11, 2007 4:06 PM

He also knows what you're wearing.

Posted by monkey | October 11, 2007 4:09 PM

House of Joy my ass.

Posted by Michigan Matt | October 11, 2007 4:10 PM

AAAHH! This brought me right back to an early clown trauma:

It's 8 a.m. and I'm 7 years old, riding my bike downtown to see the parade in the crappy little logging town I grew up in. Suddenly, a clown approaches me. Unshaven. Drunk. And wearing a pair of HUGE NAKED TITS on the outside of his clothing. Nipples and all.

My sister quickly got me out of there, but it was too late -- I'm scarred for life. There is NOTHING more nightmarish than a perverted clown.

Posted by Irena | October 11, 2007 4:12 PM

That wasn't a clown. It was a Repub candidate.

Posted by Will in Seattle | October 11, 2007 4:19 PM

See, now I'll never convince my niece that she has no reason to fear clowns.

Posted by Gitai | October 11, 2007 4:28 PM

Biblical Stoning should be used on creepy pedophile clowns!

Posted by mj | October 11, 2007 4:35 PM

i read the whole SG report... at first it sounded like it might be a misunderstanding, and that the old man was just ignorant. but the last two pages describe that he gave a video of naked minors to his "little brother" (he was a "big brother"), and that dvds depicting minors in sexual situations were found in his home.

Posted by infrequent | October 11, 2007 5:02 PM

My lifelong fear of clowns has been confirmed and reinforced yet again. *shudder*

Posted by James | October 11, 2007 5:03 PM

When do we rise up and start shoving the Christians into the ovens?

Posted by K X One | October 11, 2007 5:36 PM

You mean the ones that bombed the WTC the first time?

Posted by Will in Seattle | October 11, 2007 5:58 PM

#12 - I don't recall the Bible saying anything against pedophilia. Lust after a woman, yank out your eye. Lust after a little boy - it's pretty mum on the subject.

But enough Devil's Advocate. What kind of a name is Klutzo, even for a clown? I get this mental image of cops catching him surrounded by a pile o' porn, and he, in full clown costume, shrugs guiltily and says "Oops, I'm such a Klutzo!"

Posted by iflurry | October 11, 2007 6:37 PM

@17 I*'m sick and should be in bed and not reading slog but you're joking right?

Sure the Bible says yank out your eye but I'm not near as nice as Jesus... I say castrate any man that lusts after a child or burn him alive or publicly stone him.
Any of the above choices seem quite merciful to me for any aadult that is lusting after a child.
Like I said I'm sick and going to bed and I'm sure it was a joke.

Posted by mj | October 11, 2007 8:17 PM

mj@18 - I'm sure you're a lovely person, but it really is difficult watching your moral gymnastics, as you try to reconcile your commendably liberal views with your faith in an invisible bearded man in the sky with special rules written on stones, a magic book, and a zombie for a son.

As far as I can tell, @17 simply states that the Bible does not contain any explicit prohibition of paedophilia, which, as far as I'm aware, is correct.

Posted by Bento | October 11, 2007 9:18 PM

My commendable liberal views... Why Thank You!
There are no mental gymnastics involved I'm quite secure in what I believe. You have no idea what I believe.
I still have no sympathy for pedophiles. If you can't handle it or I hit a sore spot I really do not care!
This post was about a pedophile and i was simply stating my opinion not accusing anybody!
I have worked in orphanages for years and have dealt with many of them... Most of them are creepy white men who call themselves ministers to children.

Posted by mj | October 11, 2007 10:25 PM


You're new here, aren't you?

Posted by Greg | October 12, 2007 8:50 AM

Christians are all child molestors. There has never been a Jewish children's clown who molested children.

This is because Christianity is a religion for perverted idiots. Judaism is a religion of truth and justice.

Posted by Issur | October 12, 2007 10:44 AM

This is really fucking disturbing. Seriously, all three of the biggest freak-out-inducing aspects are here: Clown, Pedophile, and evangelical Christian. I feel physically ill.

Posted by RoB | October 15, 2007 5:04 AM

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