Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« Speaking of Gay Men Who Grew U... | Obama: Apparently Not a Mornin... »

Thursday, September 6, 2007

All About My Mustache

posted by on September 6 at 12:30 PM


I used to look like this.

Now I look like this.

I know, it looks a little weird, but the looks it gets are even weirder—people keep asking whether it’s an ironic mustache or an unironic mustache or an aggressively anti-ironic mustache, which is really a kind of backwards irony. It’s hard to keep up.

Fact is, it’s a charity mustache. A mustache for the kids. A mustache for the annual Mustache-A-Thon for 826 Seattle, the youth tutoring and writing center.

It’s like a walk-a-thon for lazy people—some of us grow mustachios, others sponsor them.

So if you don’t hate children and don’t hate literacy and don’t hate me, you might consider donating here (via Paypal) or sending a little something to:

826 Seattle
8414 Greenwood Ave N
Seattle, WA 98103

And now for the first Mustache Fact of the Week: The Dutch slang for mustache is de befborstel, which refers to the mustache specifically as a tool for stimulating the clitoris, probably from beffen “to stimulate the clitoris with the tongue.” (Dirty Dutch.)

RSS icon Comments


I know I've said this a zillion times, but I fully reject the notion that facial hair can be at all ironic. And Lord KNOWS I've had to address the topic (and all the attendant "mustache ride" jokes), as I've worn a mustache for nearly three years.

Keep it, Brendan. It works well on you.

Posted by Nick | September 6, 2007 12:44 PM

Beffen, eh? Close to beef which might explain why the Brits refer to the labia as meat curtains. Odd and kind of disgusting, isn't it?

Almost every guy wants to explore the effects of facial hair. It's a rite of passage. I like the 70s porn star look, but you're pretty handsome either way. My guess, though, is that most people would prefer you shaven.

Your choice of charity is brilliant and thanks.

Posted by Bauhaus | September 6, 2007 12:49 PM

Have you been doing any stimulating? You know, for the kids.

Posted by Mr. Poe | September 6, 2007 12:50 PM

Too bad you're straight or you'd be gettin' tons of action from the 'stache.
And you could don a pair of aviator sunglasses and give people speeding tickets for fun.

I forget, is facial hair popular with het gals? My friends say no and hell no.

I have a beard without the mustache (it's just too itchy) that I'm quite proud of.

Posted by Original Andrew | September 6, 2007 12:51 PM

Today's Porn Stache brought to you by Brendan Kiley! Thanks Brendan!

Posted by john holmes | September 6, 2007 12:53 PM

Some people look better with mustaches. (Tom Selleck, Burt Reynolds)

Some people don't.

Brendan would fall into the latter category, sad to say. He's MUCH cuter without the 'stache.

Posted by michael strangeways | September 6, 2007 1:02 PM

Can I comb your moustache, Mr. Kiley?

Posted by Gloria | September 6, 2007 1:04 PM

I'm with Bauhaus -- 826 Seattle is a fantastic organization.

Posted by kid icarus | September 6, 2007 1:04 PM

It's very much an Officer Dangle look on you, Brendan. I personally think you look better without.

I do like the full beard and stache but I'm ready for that trend to go away because I can't grow a good beard and I feel left out.

Example: I've had a goatee/stache combo for the last year and shaved it off a couple weeks ago. So far only two people have noticed it was missing. sigh.

Posted by monkey | September 6, 2007 1:14 PM

I had no idea that you are the spitting image of Martin Short...

Posted by Hernandez | September 6, 2007 1:29 PM

You looked much better without it Kiley, much better

Posted by Just Me | September 6, 2007 1:35 PM

One Word: HAWT.

that is all.

Posted by Original Monique | September 6, 2007 1:36 PM

I too am growing a mustache for 826

Posted by Blaire | September 6, 2007 1:37 PM

Ik heb geen befborstel, maar ik hou van beffen.

Posted by Gabriel | September 6, 2007 1:45 PM

I've seen that moustache before, on Eric Idle during a Monty Python skit. Where's your ascot?

Posted by Fnarf | September 6, 2007 1:47 PM

Dude. Hot. (With or without 'stache.)

Posted by Rose Red | September 6, 2007 2:10 PM

how about some super props for Olympia homie, Burke Kelly? WORLD MUSTACHE CHAMPION OF THE WORLD! nice work Burke, way to represent for Evergren and for the '501!

Posted by jzilla | September 6, 2007 2:32 PM

Kiley, you look A LOT like Kaiser Wilhelm II. Check it out.

Posted by Just Me | September 6, 2007 2:47 PM

Don't listen to those hairophobes, Brendan.

The'stache is frackin' hot - keep it!!

Posted by Original Andrew | September 6, 2007 2:58 PM

Dude! Brendan Kiley is hot! Who knew?

Posted by Callie | September 6, 2007 3:05 PM

I'm not seeing it, No. 18: perhaps we can get him to pose in a Pickelhaube?

Posted by NapoleonXIV | September 6, 2007 3:23 PM

to mustachioed brendan: come on and stay at the Y...M-C-A!

and i'm sorry, but i'm already supporting blaire @ 13's mustache. i don't like kids enough to support two mustaches. kids dressed as santa killed my grandma. you understand.

Posted by adrian! | September 6, 2007 3:50 PM

that shit is hottt

Posted by sars | September 6, 2007 3:50 PM

Wow, I'm disappointed there are no comments about the guy with an octopus attacking his face...

Wait, make that one.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | September 6, 2007 4:19 PM
25're hot either way Brendan and you know it. Stop teasing all the queer guys with your visage. We've accepted that we can't have you. ^_^

Posted by Benjamin | September 6, 2007 4:20 PM

Why aren't there any women participating. I would donate to that.

btw - check out Beard Team USA!

Posted by rubyred | September 6, 2007 4:30 PM

I also have a very-nearly-non-existent moustache that I'm nurturing for 826 Seattle. Go Team Duffell! Go 22-year-olds with skimpy upper-lip hair...

Posted by John Duffell | September 6, 2007 4:50 PM

@24: I totally love the octopus beard/moustache on the guy with the pipe & hat. Awesome. Very Baron Munchausen. If I could grow that kind of beard/moustache, I would.

Posted by SDA in SEA | September 6, 2007 5:08 PM

I've been looking for an excuse to grow an aweful mustache. Thanks to 826 for providing one, and to Brendan for the assist.

Posted by Sean | September 6, 2007 6:13 PM

It's worth noting that because of our awesome Mustache-a-Thon last year, both 826 Valencia and 826 Michigan jumped on the trend.

Give 'em some love:

Now, give us some love and/or some of your cash money at the main Mustache Blog page, updated in a fashion that is nearly more than weekly:

Posted by brinsonian | September 6, 2007 10:21 PM

@14- Dat is ok, de vrouwen zullen hoe dan ook van je houden

Posted by Victoria | September 7, 2007 2:28 AM

Brendan, kudos on the 'stache! My dad (63) has had a mustache for over 32 years. He's NEVER once shaved it on all that time. My parents have been married for 31 years, so my Mom's never even seen him without it. Pretty neat!

I read about the Dutch slang term and it's meaning. Similarly, my Dad calls his "the womb broom"

Kinda gross, but funny nonetheless! :)

Posted by Katy | September 7, 2007 11:55 AM

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).