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Monday, August 27, 2007

Sharkansky: Shitty Tipper, Vindictive Jerk

posted by on August 27 at 11:17 AM


Last week, the friend of a waitress at the Fremont Classic Pizzeria posted an unflattering account of her experience serving right-wing blogger Stefan Sharkansky, his wife Irene, and their five-year-old kid on his personal blog, noting that not only did they let their child run around unsupervised, they tipped a pathetic 10 percent. Sharkansky—clearly a man who spends a lot of time Googling himself—could have let the blog post remain obscure. Instead, according to Blatherwatch, Sharkansky and his wife Irene

did [opposition] research, searched public records, got everything they could on her, like the trouble her kid got into; some profane old online rantings about boyfriends and husbands past, and posted everything on Sound Politics [a blog with a huge readership]. They also found out she worked a 2nd job temping at Amazon.

That wasn’t enough for Sharkansky, though. He sent a relative to the restaurant, according to Blatherwatch, and the single mother of two, who had worked at the restaurant for more than a year, chose to resign rather than bring bad publicity to the restaurant.

Then—despite the fact that the blogger had already taken down the offending post—Sharkansky demanded a retraction. Finally—after the waitress complied, with a groveling apology (“My place is to smile and serve food… Please, please forgive me”) and an official retraction (“I am so sorry for any pain or inconvenience I caused”) Sharkansky took the hit piece down. The damage, of course, was already done.

See also here and here.

RSS icon Comments


what a fucking prick

Posted by fs | August 27, 2007 11:19 AM

What a motherfucker. If I owned a restaurant, I'd refuse him service. As it is, if I saw him on the street, I'd had to work hard to not beat the hell out of him.

Posted by Gitai | August 27, 2007 11:22 AM

What #1 said.

Posted by Mr. Poe | August 27, 2007 11:22 AM

What a dick. But we already knew that.

It would be fitting if all local waitstaff in Seattle agreed to "accidentally" spill beverages in his lap whenever he shows up at a local restaruant.

What have they got to lose, a measely 10% tip?

Posted by Sean | August 27, 2007 11:24 AM

@4 - he got the woman fired from her job, so really, what do they have to lose? their job.

Posted by actually... | August 27, 2007 11:26 AM

Is it just me or do pizza places usually get short changed on the whole tip business?

And what #1 said.

Posted by monkey | August 27, 2007 11:28 AM

kill republicans on sight. it's the only way.

Posted by adrian! | August 27, 2007 11:28 AM

Lose their job for spilling a drink? Nah.

Posted by Sean | August 27, 2007 11:28 AM

Dear Stefan-

Are you so pathetic that you have to go out of your way to crush a waitress? REALLY?

I hope it gave you a tingle in your shriveled nether regions. there's really no other reason to be such a tool.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | August 27, 2007 11:29 AM

I predict Ms. Sharkansky will be eating a lot of spit in his entrees for the next few years.

Posted by The Seattle Waiting Community | August 27, 2007 11:29 AM

lol, gossip. If I were Sharky, I would never, ever eat out again at this point. Lord knows what unconventional ingredients will show up in his entree.

Posted by tsm | August 27, 2007 11:30 AM

Didn't he used to be a regular columnist for the Stranger?

Posted by twee | August 27, 2007 11:31 AM

@10: Yes!!!

Posted by Sean | August 27, 2007 11:31 AM

Personally, I feel if you treat waiters poorly it should be known-it says a lot about who a person is.

Posted by Dianna | August 27, 2007 11:32 AM

I've never been to that restaurant -- from this story they certainly sound like a bunch of pricks as well...

Posted by GoodGrief | August 27, 2007 11:39 AM

I didn't post those comments on my personal private anonymous blog (which was found out by Sharkansky some how)a friend of a friend posted my comments on his blog:
It was a mutual decision for me to quit the restaurant because I didn't want to cause the place to lose business. I loved working there - those people were like family.

Posted by Waitress | August 27, 2007 11:41 AM

Sharkansky is a MOTHER FUCKER!

Posted by Deacon Seattle | August 27, 2007 11:42 AM

Anyone who's done service/waiting/bartending know all about the 10%ers.

They're the most demanding, the biggest assholes, and the most disrespectful of how it is that you've come to earn your money.

Best cure for 10%ers to turn them into base-line 15%ers: Don't twist your cheap-ass guts up over 2 fucking dollars.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | August 27, 2007 11:45 AM

Major-league asshole is the term that comes to mind. Sharkansky is a vile vindictive asswipe who should be tied to Tim Eyman and Mark Driscoll and thrown in the sound.

Plus it sounds like he's a lousy parent, too. And a crappy tipper. Textbook republican pantload.

Posted by steph | August 27, 2007 11:46 AM

This is a better one; that's him on the left. Post it in every kitchen!

Posted by tsm | August 27, 2007 11:46 AM

The restaurant was worried about losing business due to Sharky's threats? I hope they lose business for caving to that asshole. I know I'll never eat there.

Posted by keshmeshi | August 27, 2007 11:47 AM

I don't think "Vindictive Jerk" quite describes these actions. I'd have to go with "Incomprehensively Heartless Insecure Mother-Fucking Douche-Guzzling Egoist", though I might have left something out.

Posted by steve | August 27, 2007 11:49 AM

"I would avoid the chowder this evening, Mr. Sharkansky."

Posted by flamingbanjo | August 27, 2007 11:52 AM

Go to Shark Blog and post a comment asking him why he went out of his way to destroy this lady.

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 11:53 AM

It was my decision to not bring the place bad press. The owner is a great guy and everyone who works there is very supportive of me. The place deserves your patronage.

Posted by Waitress | August 27, 2007 11:53 AM

Waitress- it sounds like you did the "big" thing, but were there really concerns about the place losing business? In Seattle? In Fremont in Seattle? Seems like nothing more than free, good press for the place. Anyway, sorry you got dicked by a shitty customer, then double-dicked by the same guy. Hope all's well!

Posted by sniggles | August 27, 2007 11:57 AM

I heard a quote once but I don't know who from. I think it was one of those inspiration email forwards I hate so much but the line was a good one and I think very true.

Someone who is nice to you but not to waiters is not a nice person.

Posted by monkey | August 27, 2007 12:03 PM

Well, ECB, your third-hand spin of innuendo has certainly gotten the predictable response from the slog chorus. Even got a death threat thrown in there, humorously intended, no doubt.

Just throw in something about bicycle protests and keeping wheelchairs off the bus and you can get another winner on your hands here.

I say good on the Sharkansky's for not backing down when someone takes aim at their 5-year old. Stefan, sure, he's a public enough figure and can stand up for himself, but leave the kid out of it.

It probably doesn't help matters with the owners that the waitress in question apparently had a habit of snarkily bashing the customers of said establishment on her blog. Reap what you sow, and all that.

Posted by chunkstyle | August 27, 2007 12:05 PM

"A little tapioca pudding for dessert, Mr. Sharkansky? The chef has a special recipe he'd like to share."

I'll join the chorus: Shark, you're not a human being, you're a leaking colostomy bag. Eat your fucking pizza in Bellevue, jerk.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 12:06 PM

@#21, I agree. I'll never eat there again.

Posted by chris | August 27, 2007 12:06 PM

@24 His comments seem to be disabled. How sad. Here's the note I wanted to send:

"Heard about the pizza/waitress debacle on the Slog, and just wanted to let you know that you seem to be a prick of the creepiest order. How's that shiny ego of yours, you douchebag? Have a great day!"

Posted by It's Mark Mitchell | August 27, 2007 12:07 PM

The last two sentences of this post make it sound like Sharkansky took down the hit piece to prevent any further damage from accruing to the waitress. However, I would assume it was more for the purpose of removing the evidence that he is one of the most egregious, colossal, monumental assholes of all time.

Posted by David | August 27, 2007 12:08 PM

@31, I have to check if my comment made it yet. When I posted it said it posted.

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 12:14 PM

@28 You're an idiot.

Posted by JessB | August 27, 2007 12:15 PM

My comment was dropped!!

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 12:16 PM

In that photo posted earlier, Sharkansky is the one on the left. The other guy is David Goldstein (Goldy) of I have no idea what kind of tipper Goldy is, but I just wanted to clarify for any of you would be chowder-tamperers out there.

Posted by me | August 27, 2007 12:16 PM

Boy-Man Snarksky's antics aside... I'm more curious about the tipping habits of Seattle's Alpha, Beta, and Demi-celebrities.

Come on, Slog - just how much do local celebs tip and treat Servers in general? Hmmm?

Posted by misrule | August 27, 2007 12:17 PM

My comment on his blog is still there, for now.

Chunkstyle, the waitress didn't "take aim at their 5-year-old, and you know it. When parents won't take responsibility for their child's misbehavior, it's the parents' fault, not the child's.

In honor of Dan's successful campaign to forever associate the glorious name of santorum with the substance that fills the Shark's soul, can we come up with a similar repurposing of "Sharkansky"? As in, "watch out for the sharkansky on table three"?

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 12:23 PM

I've never agreed with Sharkansky's politics, but I never thought of him as a bad person or anything. Now I see that he walks his talk. What a horrible person inside and out.

Anyone who works retail or restaurants talks about the customers; they are a big source of daily conversation. Big deal. Sharkansky has completely lost any shred of credibility in my book.

Posted by blah | August 27, 2007 12:23 PM

For the record, Fnarf is usually in the 20-25% range (more if you've refilled my coffee five or more times). I may not be a celebrity but I LOVE waitrons.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 12:25 PM

what an asshole. he calls his blog useful work but he sits around and blogs all day. when he gets hit, he gets a single mom who works two jobs fired. he has no idea what it is to work, like most libertarian/ republican nutjobs.

Posted by wf | August 27, 2007 12:28 PM

@28... it may seem like a minor point, but the waitress indicated that she did not post the comments on her blog, a friend posted them on his blog.

Also, I don't think she was going after the 5-year old kid. She was commenting about the PARENTS and their lack of parenting skills (or lack of courtesy to other patrons). At that age, the child's behavior is a reflection of the parents.

Posted by Julie | August 27, 2007 12:32 PM

Fnarf @ 38,

The larger aspect of the story is that this waitress passed off fantastical writing that got publicized by a local b-lister. Sharkansky asked her (and him) to take down the false and misleading story, or else he would leave up his (now deleted) post on the item so that search crawlers would bring it up when her name was googled. Her world started crashing down because of her habit of badmouthing customers and identifying the restaurant in question and the attention that was being brought.

She since recanted the story and took down the offending posts. Sharkansky, likewise, accepted her retraction, took down his post, and put up the end of story response.

It should have died there, but here we get a slanted Monday morning re-hash on the slog, so everyone's getting their dander up about what they think might have happened based on partisan discussion over a retracted story.

Posted by chunkstyle | August 27, 2007 12:35 PM

Erica -- why didn't you bother to contact my wife or me for a comment before posting this? [You know how to reach me, you've contacted me in the past].

Blatherwatch's account that you repeat is largely untrue. And you failed to link to my blog where I post the waitress' retraction of her original story where she acknowledges that it wasn't entirely truthful.

Posted by Stefan Sharkansky | August 27, 2007 12:36 PM

*UPDATE* You can post comments on his charming website. If this upsets you let the restaurant know as well.

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 12:36 PM

The joke is on sharkansky, Im going to run a bunch of these off, plus URL and a small paragraph on his behavior tomorrow at work.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | August 27, 2007 12:38 PM

Chunks - open a restaurant specializing in 10% tippers, then sing me your song again.

My money sez you never worked in service. The worst customers never have.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | August 27, 2007 12:38 PM

@ 44, I noticed that you also failed to provide those links...

Posted by Matt from Denver | August 27, 2007 12:43 PM

Lloyd @ 47:

What's with the tip fixation? I didn't mention anything about it, but the surrounding coverage (cf. Blatherwatch) seems to indicate $10 on a $65 bill. What's wrong with that?

Again, not sure why you're attacking me on the restaurant side of things, but I worked my way up through many restaurants as a line cook and sous chef, so I'm pretty familiar with the back of the house operations, and am a notoriously good tipper by and large. It's not clear why you are implying that I am among the 'worst customers'. I hope my bona fides pass your muster, or else I will be forced to hang my head in shame.

Posted by chunkstyle | August 27, 2007 12:45 PM

You've still failed, Stefan. You've failed as a human being. Your actions in the restaurant were unremarkable but your thermonuclear reaction afterwards is absolutely unforgiveable. This just confirms what is apparent about you after even a cursory examination of your body of work: you're scum. And you and your wife are now on every shitlist in town. I feel sorry for your kid.

Chunkfucker: she recanted her story under threat. That's appalling. That you would defend this behavior makes you look like a lickspittle.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 12:47 PM

Well, Fnarf,

I'm trying to address points of this sordid tale that are not being mentioned here. It's too bad you feel the need to bastardize my nick in order to strengthen your rebuttal, I would have hoped you could do better than that, but hey, I guess you work with what you have available to you.

Posted by chunkstyle | August 27, 2007 12:49 PM

I know I'm going to get flack for this, but...

maybe, she DESERVED a 10% tip...maybe,she was a bad waitress...lord knows there are a lot of shitty, jerkwad waitrons in this town who thing they are owed 15 to 25% tips for simply being there...

i'm just saying...i'm sure she is a lovely waitress and this douchebag IS a douchebag (which he is, for going to ridiculously vindictive extremes to get even with her), but I'm not really into wholeheartedly going rah-rah for the Waiters Union 'cause I had a really CRAPPY one at the 5 Spot last night and an hour long wait for overpriced diner food...and he got 10% for ignoring us, never apologizing for the long wait or even attempting to be moderately pleasant or professional...and sadly, there ARE a lot of these in Seattle.

Shitty tippers do shitty waiters...

(yes, I have been a waiter...and I tip 20% to 25% for good service, 15% for average service and 10% for bad service...and I seldom tip counter people, except for bartenders, {duh, better, stronger drinks} and sometimes baristas {but I seldom buy coffee in stores 'cause I can make it at home})

Posted by michael strangeways | August 27, 2007 12:51 PM

@43 if i had a dime every time i've heard conservatives use the words "partisan" or "political" for whatever they are currently defending themselves from, i'd be rich. or at least have a lot of dimes.

i swear, the word "political" is the 2008 "flip-flopper". let me break the news to you, politics are inherently political. fo real.

Posted by cochise. | August 27, 2007 12:53 PM

The issue isn't whether Shark is a crappy tipper or not, or whether whatsername is a crappy waitress or not. The issue is whether it was appropriate for Shark and his hoe-bag to to go after her with both barrels, get her fired, and threaten to get her fired from her other, unrelated, job too. THAT'S what makes him a walking toilet brush.

And those are the points that Chunk is missing out on.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 12:57 PM

Right Sharksie, a recantation under duress (it was bad enough you got her fired from one job, but then you had to threaten going after job #2 in order to get her to "take back" her story) is worth about as much as a confession at Abu Ghraib after a few rounds of water-boarding; in short, it means nothing.

Your actions speak for themselves; better learn to live with the consequences. After all, that IS the lesson you seem to be trying to impart to this woman.

Posted by BlatherWatch Watcher | August 27, 2007 12:58 PM

@ 51, let me take a stab at it. I'll preface by saying that I haven't read the offending post since it apparently was taken down by threat, and that Sharkansky also has taken his posts down. That means that I have to go by what's being reported by ECB - that the waitress complained online about a customer who let their kid misbehave and tipped poorly to boot. (I agree that kvetching about the tip is beside the point, but it's also the cherry on top for the waitress.) If the blog is the sort that's read by only a few friends why call attention to it the way Sharkansky did? Why did he go out of his way to post about this, and why did a relative go to the restaurant, threaten the waitress, and result in her losing her job? She may have left "voluntarily" but it was certainly under duress.

If he had ignored it it wouldn't be the talk of the blogs.

Since you imply that you've read all the blogs in question, please let us know what ECB got wrong.

Posted by Matt from Denver | August 27, 2007 1:03 PM

Fnarf, your comments (and all the others under that thread) at Shark blog were deleted.

Posted by Matt from Denver | August 27, 2007 1:04 PM

@54, EXCELLENT!! Keep this on point. It is not about the tip (she could have been a bad waitress) It is about a right wing tool ABUSING his position and ripping her apart.

The Republicans prove every day that they are just after one thing and that is power over other people.

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 1:05 PM
Posted by leek | August 27, 2007 1:07 PM

RE: implying that opposition research was uncalled for: was there not a Slog post about a yellow Hummer last week in which people suggested using this same tactic, just because the owner had some stickers that the Slog readership didn't agree with?

Posted by asdf | August 27, 2007 1:08 PM

I dislike Republican philosophies as much as the next girl, but in this instance, I'd say it's likely that a restaurant owner would be pissed off if ANY customer came in and pointed out that a waitperson had been blogging about their family's behavior in the restaurant.

Probably doesn't matter in this instance that the guy is a Republican biggishwig.

Posted by leek | August 27, 2007 1:08 PM

Chunks - It good to know that you have had years in The Kitchens (aka "back of the house") and you are a "notoriously good tipper". Foolish for me to have thought otherwise. It is I who will hang my head in shame upon reading your resume.

You still need me to explain the tip thing, though? Serious?

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | August 27, 2007 1:14 PM

i work at one of teh Sharks fav. restaraunts. he comes in with his wife and kid fairly often. he will be eating spit, splooge and pubic hairs for a long, long time. hope you like the taste of other peoples waste you obnoxious fuck.

Posted by waits_on_the_shark | August 27, 2007 1:16 PM

@59 - bwahahaha. If Sharky just wanted that little piece of secondhand gossip to go away, he certainly failed. The Google cache will now feature many pages recording his doucheitude for posterity.

Posted by tsm | August 27, 2007 1:19 PM

Even even half of what I've read is true, then good Lord do I feel sorry for the future school teachers of the Sharknasty's child.

Posted by Dougsf | August 27, 2007 1:25 PM

Chunkstyle @ 49:

Read the Blatherwatch thread again. The $10 tip on a $65 bill appears to be from another night entirely -- Irene is digging up receipts to prove that the Sharkanskys are not congenital undertippers, they really do tip 15% most of the time. Vindictive assholes, maybe, but ain't nobody gonna call the Sharkanskys bad tippers!

Posted by David | August 27, 2007 1:27 PM

@65, I am sure the kid will go to private school. He is a republican after all. And after years of the GOP gutting public education there is no way they send their children to public school.

Posted by Just Me | August 27, 2007 1:27 PM

@ 64, don't laugh too much. I did some googling myself (using "Steffany," the waitron's name, and "Sharkansky" as my key words) and found that even a cached page about it was deleted.

Posted by Matt from Denver | August 27, 2007 1:28 PM

eh... nobody wins here. sharkansky seems to have over-reacted. but did you read the waitress's comments? they were really harsh, and -- despite how spun -- were about the kid. if i had read that about me i would certainly be tempted to print it out and take it to the restaurant owner.

this is a case of poor judgement and over-reaction on top of poor judgement and over-reaction.

Posted by infrequent | August 27, 2007 1:32 PM

If Sharansky were pissed, he could have gone to the waitress' boss and dealt with it privately, asking for and accepting a private apology and also requesting that the post be taken down. That would have been the mature and reasonable course of action. For making it huge and public, he deserves all the scorn he receives, and all the pubic hair, spit, and semen he eats in restaurants for the next few years, and for being the proximate cause to a single mother losing her job, he deserves a ruptured testicle.

Posted by Gitai | August 27, 2007 1:44 PM

This... was a little harsh:

Blogger/NW Restaurateur: Quite simply, the kid is Damian from the Omen. Might as well be a monkey. The kid did everything except reach in his pants and throw feces on the wall. His parents just allowed it, which said to me:
A.) Parents allow it all the time
B.) Parents beat him all the time (except in public)

Posted by flip side | August 27, 2007 1:49 PM


Shark, you're a colossal jerk, and your wife is a liar. End of story.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 1:51 PM

yeah gitai, i mostly agree. i agree that's what he should have done. but what if the manager fired her if that's all he did? i still don't really know how it is she came to lose her job and if shark actually made that request. also, didn't shark already provide the receipt to prove he actually tipped 15%?

with so much lack of information here, it is difficult to say shark is as evil as to deserve a ruptured testicle. it seems people here didn't like him to begin with.

like i said, no winners here.

Posted by infrequent | August 27, 2007 1:51 PM

Shark's deceitful wife claimed to have A receipt, not THE receipt, from an earlier visit ("early August") with a $10 tip on a $65 bill. For the night in question we have no receipt.

As I have said before, it doesn't matter whether Sharkansky tipped badly or not. It doesn't matter whether the waitress is incompetent or not. It matters that Shark takes his attack-dog personality everywhere with him, not just on his wounded-animal blog but to local restaurants. What he did to the waitress is unforgiveable. You just don't do that to people.

Posted by Fnarf | August 27, 2007 2:00 PM

@74 - how is this different (other than degree) from what happened last week w/ the intern's cover letter? using a blog to attack someone for personal (read: illegitimate) reasons is either ok or not. I seem to recall you defending it at the time. How is this tactic any different?

Posted by shoe on other foot | August 27, 2007 2:12 PM

I think more of a dick is the person that fired this woman at fremont pizza. FUck if I will go to that place again.

Posted by opus23 | August 27, 2007 2:13 PM

No matter how much you squirm, Stefan, in the end, you used your renown and power to squash a single mother earning a modest income over a trivial incident.

At any point, including in these comments, you could have handled this like a gentleman. But you aren't a gentleman. You are a self-righteous, petty, egotistical bully, or as Fnarf @29 so eloquently put it, a "leaking colostomy bag".

Posted by Sean | August 27, 2007 2:13 PM

This whole sorry episode raises a lot of interesting questions, but I'm a bit taken aback by Fnarf's string of ad hominem attacks.

I'm curious how the responsibilities differ for the author of a heavily-read blog and author of a blog that no one reads. It seems like both engaged in childish personal attacks.

I disagree with Sharkansky on a lot of stuff, and agree with him on a few things, but I'm not sure that his "body of work" shows that he is "scum." This incident certainly shows poor judgment -- kind of like the Catholic Church giving a dirty movie free publicity by condemning it.

Posted by MHD | August 27, 2007 2:15 PM

thanks for the clarification fnarf... i still feel there isn't enough info to be jumping to these conclusions... but it also seems you know more about it than i do. i'd still like to hear if shark actually caused the firing... the fact that he blogged, well, it was immature and he he should have been above it, but not that surprising or that big of deal in and of itself.

Posted by infrequent | August 27, 2007 2:15 PM

I should add (for clarification) that I agree with the Sean and Fnarf's core argument that his reaction was unnecessary and spiteful, although I shrink from their general "Sharkansky == Hitler" tone.

Posted by MHD | August 27, 2007 2:19 PM

I do not know who this Shark is but he sounds like a guy who thinks the world owes him something or feels extremely insecure with himself. We know we all rant and vent about the people we meet day to day, especially in retail or service industries. I am sure he does too. So this waitress told her friend about her experience with him and his family. So what? And the friend wrote about it on a blog- a blog that maybe some random person or friend may or maynot come across and think "Hmmm, interesting..Oh well." Again, so what? What Shark did was pretty close to slander if it wasn't it exactly. He intentionally looked up her private records and those of her children. Those sites and services usually require a fee or price. Then he took whatever slightly unsavory result he dug up and posted it on not just a blog but a very national, public widely read internet media engine. He purposefully and maliciously did whatever he could to make her suffer and ruin her as much as he could. He even sent a relative to personally assault her becuase he was too much of a chicken to confront her himself. I have now read some of his posts. He doesn't have anything interesting to say-nothing new or even remotely original in my opinion. He is just as bad as those he writes about and chastises on his blog...maybe even worse. I am ashamed for him and just feel plain sad for him. It takes a special type of miserable or unbalanced person to take the actions as a first and only resort as he did for such a silly thing as it was. And the stupedist thing about it is, since we was so offended and deeply hurt by one person's take on his behavior is a maybe isolated incident because we all have off days, how must he feel now considering people think even worse of him that they would if he was just a crappy tipper that doesn't discipline his kids? And to boot it's at his own hands. Is he gonna take revenge on himself now?

Posted by Ashamedforhim | August 27, 2007 2:33 PM

So am I the only one who's laughing at Stefan's actual response to this whole thing here?

Of COURSE ECB is not going to contact you if she's planning an attack piece on you! It might deflate the balloon if she heard your side, especially if it's just a Slog entry.

Posted by matthew fisher wilder | August 27, 2007 2:35 PM

MHD @78

I'm curious how the responsibilities differ for the author of a heavily-read blog and author of a blog that no one reads. It seems like both engaged in childish personal attacks.

Fair enough. Here's an analogy. Let's say a batshit crazy girlfriend (5'3", 105 pounds) freaks out and punches her boyfriend (6'3", 250 pounds) in the face. As hard as she can. Maybe she even chips his tooth with her ring.

Which is the appropriate response for the boyfriend?
a) Walk away.
b) Call the police.
c) Wind up and punch her back as hard as he can, knocking out 7 teeth, shattering her jaw, and putting her in the hospital for weeks until the brain swelling goes down.

Posted by Sean | August 27, 2007 2:36 PM

@81: Are you sure you're not Benjy Compson?

Posted by Billy Faulkner | August 27, 2007 2:43 PM

@59, thanks for the original post. It's a little more petty and crass than I thought it would be, but I think that's because it's in interview format rather than a short "hey, my friend waited on this guy and his kid was a terror and he didn't tip well" anecdote.

One interesting thing... Waitress @16 says "I didn't post those comments on my personal private anonymous blog (which was found out by Sharkansky some how)". Um, yeah. On her friends blog entry she was referred to as a blogger and the link to her blog was provided.

Posted by Julie | August 27, 2007 2:48 PM

Thank you, flip side, I was considering posting that snippet myself when I came across it.

Where does this waitress get off saying stuff like that? Especially the very last line. It sounds to me like she got a little inventive when she was venting her spleen.

I'd want to get her canned.

Posted by Toby | August 27, 2007 2:50 PM

Do keep in mind that his lips are sewn to Dino Rossi's ass, and there's plenty of evidence that Dino is a shitty tipper ( as well...perchance he's just trying to get back in with Camp Ro$$i.

Stefan used to patronize a business i worked for for some time. He was always kind of creepy, made eye contact with my tits, and i'm not at all surprised he's going to such lengths to cover up his own fuckups; he is a Republican, after all.

Posted by willamina c. | August 27, 2007 2:53 PM

Regardless of his lack of writing skills, tips are not mandatory and may have reflected the glares the customer got from the wait staff at the establishment.

I tip when my pizza gets delivered, but it is not a requirement since I didn't eat in. Tips in pizza places tend to be lower than more formal restaurants - and think of fast food where we don't tip.

We should emulate New Zealand and pay wait staff a good wage and abolish tips, IMHO.

Posted by Will in Seattle | August 27, 2007 2:54 PM

For I am The Table No One Wants To Take.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | August 27, 2007 2:55 PM

@7 - we should try them for their crimes before we execute Red Bushies.

@40 - well, as someone who orders pizza in Fremont and takes friends to sit down and eat pizza there, I will say that they probably lost more local business by listening to Sharkansky.

Posted by Will in Seattle | August 27, 2007 3:03 PM

Will in Seattle @88, totally agree with you. I actually think that once you read the original blog post where the waitress discusses her experience she comes across as, well, not sympathetic.

BUT, my issue with him isn't that he didn't tip well or even that he let his kid run wild. The issue is his overreaction to a blog post on an obscure blog -- he single-mindedly worked to destroy this woman instead of opting for a more mature/rational response.

Posted by Julie | August 27, 2007 3:07 PM

once again, i'll agree that he's an asshole if you can show me where he single-handledly destroyed this woman. here someone as "waitress" says she quit voluntarily to help the establishment. and is shark responsible for what his relative did? did that really happen at all?

the conclusions drawn here are based on information that i've yet to see verified.

oh, and the fight analogy is hardly fair, as punching is illegal and results in direct physical harm. more like a street shouting match. if someone shouts at you, but has a littel tiny voice, should you shout back in your big booming voice....

Posted by infrequent | August 27, 2007 3:14 PM

Sean @83,

Good point. I would guess that Sharkansky, like many blogger/activists, doesn't see himself as big and powerful, although he certainly is relative to this woman.

His behavior was childish. An effort to conflate this behavior with his conservative beliefs, however, probably doesn't do the accusers much good (although you personally didn't do so). There are certainly many politically liberal types who can't be bothered to treat the "little people" with dignity.

And even if the reaction was thermonuclear, and it was, that hardly warrants some of the names he and his wife are being called. "Ho-bag?" C'mon, Fnarf, you're better than that.

Posted by MHD | August 27, 2007 3:20 PM

I can actually pinpoint the moment she inspired his bloodlust:

Meet the Stress: You mentioned that he would come with his wife. Describe her:
Blogger/NW Restaurateur: Asian. Does everything - definitely wears the pants.

The Republican male ego is a truly fragile thing; it must be constantly boosted by subordinate womenfolk, large SUVs, and prosthetic, guns.

She challenged his masculinity, therefor she must be dealt with.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | August 27, 2007 3:20 PM

I just read this at the soundpolitcs blog. They were refering to the bush protests on the east side.

The best place to park your car is at Bellevue Square. Be thankful the event is held on the Eastside and not Seattle so you don't have to worry about getting bent over like a Stranger staff writer with any exorbitant parking fees

hahahahahaha get it. Because people that write for the stranger are gay.

Posted by opus23 | August 27, 2007 3:27 PM

"And even if the reaction was thermonuclear, and it was, that hardly warrants some of the names he and his wife are being called. "Ho-bag?" C'mon, Fnarf, you're better than that."

Agreed. I would of went with cum gurgling gutter whore. Or just sperm dumpster.

Posted by opus23 | August 27, 2007 3:30 PM
Posted by --MC | August 27, 2007 3:45 PM

The 710 KIRO web page has a podcast of Shitkansky calling into Goldie last night -- it's the file in the 3rd hour. What a fucking asshole -- he and that wife of his seem like a real dreamy pair.

Posted by GoodGrief | August 27, 2007 4:00 PM

--MC @ 97, Erica already provided that link in her original post. The real bonus lulz are in another Blatherwatch comment thread (, where Sharkanksky blames the third-party blogger because "He included enough information for me to identify [the waitress] as the source, putting her and her employer and her co-workers at risk." ("...of my assholish and/or psychotic behavior," apparently.)

Also, Irene chimes in that "our records show that we routinely tip at least 15%," LOL. They don't seem to care if people think they're vindictive waitress-stalking assholes, but boy are they upset about people thinking they're bad tippers!

Posted by David | August 27, 2007 4:22 PM

Because everyone knows to never date a bad tipper.

Posted by It'd be better if he gave 20% of a shit about me. | August 27, 2007 4:31 PM

The words of Harry Reems in '12 Little Maidens' comes to mind right now:

"Creamy Italian? You want Creamy Italian? How about some Creamy Polish?"

Posted by YetiGirl | August 27, 2007 4:58 PM

@91 - good point.

Remember, today is Get a Red Bushie Drunk And Enlist Him For A Combat Unit In Iraq Day.

I suggest you start with Sharkansky.

Posted by Will in Seattle | August 27, 2007 5:07 PM

Sharkansky you are an ass, from now on your name will be the synonymous with Shitty Tipper, Vindictive Jerk, and Eater of Waitstaff's creative vengence. You have effectively Santorum-ed yourself. Appropriate justice for getting an uppity "little" person fired.

Posted by yucca flower | August 27, 2007 5:36 PM
Come on, Slog - just how much do local celebs tip and treat Servers in general? Hmmm?

I used to wait on Jack Roberts quite frequently in the early-'90s: fabulous tipper, and very nice guy.

Waited on Jason Webley once: shitty tipper, but also a nice guy.

The only two that come to mind right now!

Posted by shitbrain | August 27, 2007 5:40 PM

it's 6-ish on the 27th, and i think it's clear - the bitch won.

Posted by tocaughtapredator | August 27, 2007 6:10 PM

I'm coming late to this discussion. I've been working all day.

Even if true, calling Sharkansky's kid "Damiean from the Omen" and a monkey, and implying that they beat their kid, and posting it (or letting a friend post it) on a publicly read blog is totally out of line. Sure, waitrons probably talk like this to each other about crappy customers all the time... in private. But in a public forum, this is called slander. Sharkansky had every right to complain to the manager and demand the blog post be taken down. The restaurant manager should have demanded the post be taken down, and reprimanded the waitress.

But that isn't what happened. He went out of his way to ruin this woman's life. And he used his power and status as a local celebrity to do it. His actions are nothing short of vindictive blackmail by a 900 pound gorilla. Sharkansky is a spiteful egotistical bully on a power trip, and deserves every bit of bad karma and creative food additives coming his way for a long time.

Waitress, despite claiming that her termination was voluntary, does not mean I forgive the restaurant. The restaurant caved under pressure, allowing Sharkansky to run them over, along with the waitress. There are any number of lesser punishments they could have meted out besides firing her. Their acceptance of her quitting under pressure is spineless at best. Treating her like family? I think not. They won't be seeing any of my business any time soon.

Posted by SDA in SEA | August 27, 2007 6:42 PM

If you read her blog, you'll notice she made a regular habit out of dumping on her customers that paid her living. Her boss was surely horrified to find out she was contemptuously noting the "wash and wear" haircuts of the busy moms who came to the restaurant and complaining that they committed the sin of wearing denim jumpers (so the honk what??? Why should she get all bent out of shape over THAT?), noting that she thought their husbands were ugly, and said she was looking for a job where she wouldn't "have to touch people's food." And she couldn't use the F-bomb often enough in many of her rantings (which is a real shame, she's somone's MOTHER for crying out loud!)

When you pridefully dump on fellow moms for the crime of "wash and wear haircuts" and wearing slightly outdated clothing you set yourself up for a fall.
And then when you set out to destroy someone's life by name by lifting their name from a credit card and trying to hide while you tell someone made-up stuff (she admitted as much) about someone including a little kid, you get the light of day shined on you and your dirty deeds get outed. That's what happened. Don't feel too sorry for her. She created this WHOLE mess for herself.

Btw, raise your hand if you ever tipped less than 15% because the service was bad. Go ahead, because I already know you're all out there. I've left less than 15% for crummy service. I know you all have, too. Tips are earned. Raise your hand if you've ever left NO tip. yep, there's quite a few out there who've done so for good reason (like the service was non-existent). No sense pretending.

Posted by Mickey | August 27, 2007 8:21 PM

God, will everybody please SHUT UP.

None of this snarky flamewar bullshit will help this poor woman get her job back. So instead of using all your l33t sk1llz to find photos of the guy or to set up scripts to spam his comment board, how about somebody offer to spruce up her resume and not mention another word about the offender?

There's no such thing as bad publicity. Especially not for Republican assholes. Some of the most popular radio personalities make their living off of being irrational, shrill, and mean.

So give it a rest and get this woman a job or set up a tip jar to help her out.

Just forget about him.

Posted by Stephen | August 27, 2007 10:21 PM

Anyone ever hear about "confidentiality"? I work for a "name" organization in Seattle, and you can bet that if I talked to anyone outside of the organization about one of our customers by name; and if that customer or anyone complained about the lack of confidentiality,I would be fired on the spot. The person wouldn't even have to be famous or well known. Every job requires that someone buy your product or service, and if you're smart you won't insult your customer; and you certainly wouldn't allow your hired help to insult your customers at your expense.

From the truly vile comments in this blog, I'm embarraserd that I am a Seattle native. What nasty, disgusting name calling. And if depositing bodily fluids into an unsuspecting customer's food is a standard practice of "insulted" foodservers in Seattle, it doesn't speak very well to the maturity or professionalism of the industry. Is this the usual state of mind of the liberal democrats who are so self-righteous? God help us.

Posted by Carol | August 27, 2007 10:54 PM

None of this snarky flamewar bullshit will help this poor woman get her job back. So instead of using all your l33t sk1llz to find photos of the guy or to set up scripts to spam his comment board, how about somebody offer to spruce up her resume and not mention another word about the offender?

I don't run a low-end restaurant, so I can't offer her a job, or get her one.

All I can do is help make sure that search engines of the future are aware that Stefan Sharkansky is a bitter, vindictive creep, who goes around claiming (falsely) that he's a better Christian and a better person than anybody else.

Anyone ever hear about "confidentiality"

Oh give me a fucking break, Carol. He's a mini-celebrity, and he's eating in a pizzaria. There is no reasonable expectation of privacy in a pizzaria. It's where some unskilled laborers who make next to nothing go to survive.

Stefan Sharkansky's reaction, of having her fired, and of posting all of her personal contact information on the net was atrocious and uncalled for. If you disagree with that, then I think you're a horrific person and I sincerely hope that somebody posts all of *your* personal contact information to the Internet, along with instructions to bother you. And that after they're done that, that they try to fire you not only from your main job, but from your second job as well.

Honestly Carol, you're an awful person if you support Stefan Sharkansky's bitter retribution, and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Posted by Kevin | August 27, 2007 11:03 PM

Erica: Did you ever tip less than 15%? Be honest now. And was it because the service wasn't so good? I await your answer.

Posted by Michele | August 27, 2007 11:16 PM

Erica: Did you ever do a background check on a waitress, ignore the fact that she's a single mother of two, then systematically destroy her life? I await your answer.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | August 27, 2007 11:22 PM

@109 - "From the truly vile comments in this blog, I'm embarraserd that I am a Seattle native. What nasty, disgusting name calling."

Well, Carol, perhaps you should devote all your energies to digging up all the dirt you can on every poster here and trying to get them fired from any and all jobs they may have. Apparently, I'm told that would be the most mature, reasoned response.

Posted by tsm | August 27, 2007 11:29 PM

How dare him. Only low-class democrats can act that way.

Posted by Me | August 27, 2007 11:37 PM

Michele is a common poster on shark's blog. And a talented dancer.

Posted by opus | August 27, 2007 11:40 PM

Me @114, you clearly don't get the point.

Had this asshat merely trash talked her in his blog, they'd be even. But he didn't stop there- He proceeded to post her personal information, encourage harassment, get her fired from her primary job, and threatened to erase her employment completely if she didn't suckle on his pathetic ego.

Dictators and douche bags do as much.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | August 27, 2007 11:58 PM

@111: As a former service worker (retail, 7 years) I always tip at least 20 percent. There have been maybe two exceptions to that in my life.

Posted by ECB | August 28, 2007 12:23 AM

Thank you, Erica. And was it because the service wasn't good?
(That's what caused ME to leave less than 15% recently at a less-than-great dining experience.)

Posted by Michele | August 28, 2007 12:38 AM
Posted by opus | August 28, 2007 1:35 AM

That chick is a cunt.
She deserves what she got.

Waitress jobs are a dime a dozen.
It's not like it's skilled labor.

Posted by Ray | August 28, 2007 5:48 AM

There always has to be some toadies jumping to get their little stomp in after the bully. As if that's going to protect them.

Posted by Anna | August 28, 2007 6:51 AM

Wow, just like a republican to try and swat a fly with a cannon.

That man will never be able to dine out again without getting a little something 'extra' in his food that he deserves.

Hmmmmm, let's see he harassed her to the point of losing not one but both of her jobs and then demanded an apology. what a pathetic little man, he must be having um "performance" issues shall we say because no man reacts that harshly unless he's got problems of his own. crushing a woman, a waitress with 2 jobs, that screams I cant get it up to save my life.

Posted by disgusting man | August 28, 2007 7:02 AM

Before anyone starts addressing wither or not she was a good waitress, I think everyone needs to read the original article.

Meet the Stress: And on average, how much do you think his gratuity is?

Blogger/NW Restaurateur: 10%. “Mr 10%” we call him - which in 1984 was good.

Apparently there were other Waiters/Waitresses that shared her views.

Some of her comments are harsh, but that is politics. Politicians have been called worse things than this.

Posted by Rabia | August 28, 2007 9:40 AM

I am no liberal but to get someone fired over a little read blog post? Kind of like using a torpedo on a toy boat.

But from time to time, when someone wronged me, I did feel the need to do it back to them 10 times over. So I can't say I won't do what this guy has done.

This is pretty much he said/she said, I wasn't in the restaurant so I don't know what went down and if the their child was bratty.

Posted by Tom | August 28, 2007 10:00 AM

Oh, no. No, no! I opened the door this morning and found a penny and a bullet in a vinyl Visa folder. I think... I've been...Sharkanskied!

Posted by Cowerbird | August 28, 2007 11:15 AM

Americans are hilarious. You line up behind a label and then beat the shit out of each other. Meanwhile, your dollar is worth 40% less than what it was a couple of years ago, foreclosures are at an all time high, you're in a war you have no idea how to get out of and despite all this the republicans are probably going to win your next election because democrats are too stupid to figure out how to win.
Bush is a joke and Clinton was a joke as well. Oh say can you see? You're screwed America.

Posted by Glad I'm not a Yank | August 28, 2007 11:34 AM

Seattle is one sick, sick polity. First Dan Savage rubbed his snot on Republicans' doorknobs in Iowa, hoping to infect them with his cold, and now a restaurant worker vows to put 'human waste' in Sharkansky's food(waits on the shark @69). What inspires this??? Even assuming Sharkansky over-reacted, the hate-filled political rants here are an overreaction X 100.

Posted by helena handbasket | August 28, 2007 12:37 PM

This lady deserved to be fired. No matter how bad you think a customer is you should not go online and complain about them by name unless you want to get fired.

To anyone in the food industry who would spit or foul up any ones food for any reason, you should be fired. Everyone should have a basic sense of right and wrong, and that is just wrong.

On tipping: I tip 15% for the most part, unless they are really bad then I tip them spare change so they can think about how to do a better job next time.

I am in retail and have worked in the food service industry, it is not that hard. That people think its hard baffles me. The only thing I can say to those here who have gone on about how hard it is to serve food is: Attitude is everything.

If there is justice this lady will never work in the customer service industry again!

Posted by kermit | August 28, 2007 1:22 PM

I'm a liberal and I'm on Sharkansky's side.

Last year, I found out that a co-worker was writing about me on her blog every day for a month--what I said, what I wore, what I ate for lunch--all of it said in a critical, nasty diatribe about how awful I was.

It's easy to read a blog that gossips about other people, but when it happens to you, you realize what an incredible violation of privacy it is. I mean, would you want to read about how YOUR child behaved in public (especially, if he/she was having a bad day)? Would you like to read in a public blog about some dumb thing that you did in public? For most of us, those embarrassing moments can be forgotten because we know that most people around us have short memories so we can minimize the importance of the event (at least in our minds). But when someone writes about your embarrassing moment in a blog, then it's out there in the public sphere forever. Even though you don't know the person who is reading it, psychologically, you feel that you're being judged for that momentary public gaffe for all time.

So I wouldn't be so quick to judge Shark.

Posted by Diane | August 28, 2007 1:41 PM

Diane, did you get your co-worker fired? If she didn't use your real name, there is nothing you can do. The only stupid thing the waitress did was naming names and her place of employment.

If someone takes the time to blog about you on a daily basis, you must be irritating one way or the other. I know a co-worker just like that.

Posted by Tom | August 28, 2007 2:22 PM

re88: i'm a pizza delivery guy. thank you for tipping. i make minimum wage and get paid $1.50 per delivery. $1.50. 1.50 whether the pie goes up the block or requires a 25 mile round trip (yeah i had a few of those last night). factor in time, wear and tear, shitty driving conditions, no health care, gas prices, no vacation time, and the folks who tip cheap or not at all...well, you see where this is going. 88: just consider us waitrons i guess.

funny thing, i get stiffed more often by bushie types in their mcmansions than trailer park folk, at least the ones who aren't peeled on meth or oxy due to their desperation. gee, i wonder why?

oh, and stephan...thank you for re-affirming my belief in the need for class warfare. *tic tok*

Posted by wobbly | August 28, 2007 3:23 PM

wobbly, sounds like it's time for you to get a job you aren't so unhappy about. Your health won't last if you don't.

Posted by Misty | August 28, 2007 3:40 PM

Wobbly> I thought you guys were done with massacres?!? If you do not like your job get a new one. That’s all you can do! Or you can start a Union, LOL.

Posted by kermit | August 28, 2007 4:04 PM

re133: who said anything about a massacre? when did a union massacre anybody? i think you gotcher facts all reversed up
er somthin. yep tho, starting to unionize little by little.

re132: you think that snappy comment up all by yourself, churchlady?

Posted by wobbly | August 28, 2007 4:47 PM

Pizza drivers of the world unite!

Posted by kermit | August 28, 2007 4:52 PM

tsk tsk, republitard

Posted by wobbly | August 28, 2007 5:05 PM

I asked a friend of mine who works for the legal department for a department store (said I couldn't name it, but big, based in Seattle, you get the idea) about the posting about Sharkansky and quitting/getting fired. She said, unequivocally, that an employee at said department store would be fired on the spot for posting about a customer and using the store's name. You just don't do that. You have freedom of speech, but not when wearing your "company hat". Not to mention the post seems to be libelous in that it insinuates child abuse. But this guys reaction appears to have been over the top. It seems that he has opened the door for personal retribution based on offenses on blogs, which is a door that he, as a blogger, may wish to close one day.

Posted by Ron | August 28, 2007 6:42 PM

@9: yes. Only an ego-surfer would know about something like that, and only an asshole of the first order would do what he did.

Posted by paul | August 28, 2007 6:52 PM

what...beat his kid?

Posted by wobbly | August 28, 2007 8:41 PM

Lots of boo hoo hoo about low-wage workers here. The unemployment rate is what 4.4%--lots of jobs out there. My job requires roughly a 5th grade education. It pays about 50K. It is physically demanding, but not to an extreme. We have a very hard time getting people. Anyone who is working as a pizza driver, it's either because they are a screw-off or they just haven't, for whatever reason, put enough effort into finding a better job.

Posted by helena handbasket | August 29, 2007 8:03 AM

you dropped out of school in the 5th grade?


physically demanding? what do you do, give handjobs to visiting
rnc members or something? is it lucrative?

Posted by wobbly | August 29, 2007 9:08 AM

As someone who used to wait tables and who has encountered way too many people (republican or not) who think that waitstaff aren't people, but slaves; who think that they have no responsibility for the behavior of their children (ironic with the whole republican-ethic of personal responsibility... but, yanno...); who think that the concept of tipping someone who is already getting paid is personally offensive; etc...

I'm not terribly SURPRISED that someone would push something this far to self-justify their obnoxious behavior.

I also wonder what sorts of things he and his family will now find in their food EVERYWHERE they eat. This is a given, not a guess. It happens for lesser offenses. Get used to spit, toeneails, urine, etc in your food. And hope it feeds your self-righteous, egomaniacal, asshattery!!

Posted by anon | August 29, 2007 9:43 AM

Nothing like that, Wobbley, just a regular blue collar job, one where even your less-than-stellar reading skills would not necessarily disqualify you.

Anon: your first paragraph is unclear, do you, or do you not find that Republicans are bad customers? I have known lots of servers and have heard various theories on who tips, but have never before heard the theory that it is a function of politics.

Is the apparent pleasure you take in the thought of 'spit, toenails, urine, etc" in Sharkansky's food, a function of your political views? If so, think about changing them.

Posted by helena handbasket | August 29, 2007 11:23 AM

my reading skills are jest fine, sweety.

not many 50 grand a year *blue collar* jobs round here.

tell me all about yours.

Posted by wobbly | August 29, 2007 11:41 AM

You know what really bugs me about this?

Finally—after the waitress complied, with a groveling apology (“My place is to smile and serve food… Please, please forgive me”)....

"My place is to smile and serve food"? Is that what it took to placate Sharkansky?

Sounds like the Shark is of the opinion that the inferior classes should know their place.

Yeah, during my time in food service, I ran into a lot of customers who treated me with that assumption, too. "You just serve me, bitch, and if you got a problem with the way I treat you, just be glad you've got a job. Because I could change that, you know." Act as if you're a human being who also deserves respect? Let on that you don't appreciate being verbally smacked around? They'll have a little talk with your employer, and you might find yourself out on your ass.

Because you're in food service. Which means you're lower class. An inferior species. Whose place is to smile and serve.


Forwarding this story to my Seattle friends. Only fair to warn them about the vermin loose in their neighborhood. And no, I don't mean the waitress.

Posted by Nicole J. LeBoeuf-Little | August 29, 2007 12:19 PM

Sharkansky wrote: "Erica -- why didn't you bother to contact my wife or me for a comment before posting this?"

Because she already knows what sounds come out of an asshole.

Posted by Jon H | August 29, 2007 12:38 PM


No, I didn't get her fired. She got me fired. She didn't use my name, but everyone in the group knew about her blog and read it every day and since I was the only obese person in the company and that was the issue she was writing about, it was obvious who she was referring to. I wasn't told about the blog before I came into the group so I didn't know she had a blog where she documented her abhorrence of obesity until I had worked there a month.

The point is, every single person who is posting here gets on SOMEBODY's nerves for one reason or another. But that doesn't give a person the right to blog about you. Everyone deserves the right to privacy, even if you disagree with their politics.

Posted by Diane | August 29, 2007 12:41 PM


Did you ever confront her? It sounds like a pretty toxic and cliquish workplace.

I don't think she was violating your privacy by blogging but I do think she was "creating a hostile workplace." Having said that, I think everyone has a right to write whatever they want unless it crosses over into libelous untruths.

Posted by Mike | August 29, 2007 1:30 PM


Yes, in my case, I confronted her and ended up crying and yelling because I was so humiliated. The blog that I ended up on had a readership of several thousand people because this person had been on a talk show. So I know how Sharkansky and his wife feel. You feel violated, humiliated, and extremely angry. I ended up having to go on antidepressants after this happened to me.

And I have since found out that this has happened to a lot of people. And there isn't much that you can do about it because you can't sue a person for slander or harrassment if they don't have any money. They have all the power in that situation because they can say things to destroy your reputation and you have no legal recourse. The comments on this discussion are proof of that. For all you know, the entire story by the waitress could be false, but it doesn't matter because everyone has already passed judgement on Sharkansky.

And it's unfair for people to blog about other people's families because you can never know the whole story. There are kids out there who are autistic, ADHD, who have mental illnesses, or who have other behavior problems. It can take years for families of these children to get a proper diagnosis and medication, or to go through the counseling or training that's required to guide that child to the right path. People shouldn't pass judgement on kids they don't know.

Posted by Diane | August 29, 2007 2:20 PM

why did they fire you?

Posted by wobbly | August 29, 2007 2:28 PM

Well, in the spirit of the offending post, I can safely (from a position of having left the job in question over five years ago) tell you first hand that one Tim Eyman is an equally poor customer and tipper.

Posted by bd | September 1, 2007 6:24 PM

wobbly, at a guess, if Diane was fired it was because she reacted to the blog with "I confronted her and ended up crying and yelling" - if Diane was still in her probationary period, and the blog writer was a valued employee, I have to say that i think a yelling/crying confrontation in the workplace would very likely lead to the probationer getting fired and the valued employee getting warned not to write about her co-workers on her blog - because a probationer can be let go on one week's warning, while firing a permanent employee takes more time and trouble.

Diane's best recourse, if she wanted to keep the job, would have been to print out copies of the offending blog and take them to her line manager, asking her line manager to have a quiet word with the nasty blogger and warn her off doing that kind of thing in future. This is the kind of thing where hindsight is always 20/20, though - I think this because I've been bullied in the workplace and have learned by experience that getting a big emotional dram going is not the way to go - good line managers want to minimize drama and conflict in the workplace.

This is a wholly different situation from the Sharkansky's, though. They weren't being asked to work with the waitress who thought so little of them. In fact, it's clear that if the Sharkansky's didn't want anyone to know what the waitress thought of them, they'd have done better to do nothing - the blogstorm was stirred up by Stefan Sharkansky's own actions, including a blogpost on his own widely-read political blog which was a personal attack on the waitress.

Their only appropriate recourse would have been to call the manager of the restaurant, say they wouldn't be coming in again while that waitress was working there, and say why. If they were valued customers, the manager might decide to act on this by warning the waitress to get rid of the blogposts and apologize to the Sharkanskies, if she wanted to keep her job: if they were cheapskate, annoying customers, the manager might have decided the hell with it, better to let them go than lose a good waitress.

Alternatively, if Stefan Sharkansky had been a decent person: he could have said to the waitress, next time he and his wife and their son were in: "I didn't realize I was regarded as a cheap tipper, and I'll do better in future. We're both sorry our son annoyed you: he was having a bad day, and perhaps we shouldn't have taken him out. I feel your blogpost about our behavior, naming us by name, was unprofessional on your part: I'd like to ask you to remove it, or at least write an update."

Posted by Jesurgislac | September 9, 2007 7:20 AM

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