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Friday, June 8, 2007

Breast Milk Cheese

posted by on June 8 at 13:09 PM

Savage Love recommended against it.

A woman in Indonesia tried to make it, in the style of paneer, but failed.


But now a company in France is selling it, so your search for human breast milk cheese is finally over.

“The authentic cheese with the mother’s milk of woman” for “the gastronomes in search new savours.”

Not for me, thanks. I’m a big fan of breasts, but I take my coffee black and my cheese, mmm, perhaps a nice fresh chevre from Monteillet in Dayton, WA; do you have a nice Auslese Riesling to go with that?

But I’m sure most Sloggers will be champing at the bit to get at these babies.

RSS icon Comments


I've always wanted to have a go with placenta jerky:

Posted by Brendan Kiley | June 8, 2007 1:14 PM

Damn! Brendan, I was going to go with the placenta jerky, but I held back. You're a bold man, Mr. Kiley.

Posted by Fnarf | June 8, 2007 1:17 PM

Why not just finish the trend and make bile jelly

Posted by Vooodooo84 | June 8, 2007 1:19 PM


Posted by Will in Seattle | June 8, 2007 1:21 PM

I can't help but wonder if there will be market for this among wealthy vegans-for-ethical/environmental-reasons. Personally, it makes my stomach turn just thinking about it. Yecch.

Posted by Levislade | June 8, 2007 1:23 PM

Gift basket idea! chocolate anus, breast milk cheese, placenta jerky, and bile jelly... wrapped up pretty in turquoise saran wrap. For the person who already has everything.

Posted by Katelyn | June 8, 2007 1:24 PM

My lunch now wants freedom.

Posted by seattle98104 | June 8, 2007 1:24 PM

the jelly, the cheese, the jerky, hey, if it's at an art opening, i'll shove it down ye ole throat ... actually i'll stick to chex-mix.

Posted by Garrett | June 8, 2007 1:27 PM

Why, when people speak of human milk, do they call it "breast milk?" Nobody calls cow milk "udder milk". And why is it disgusting for human adults to consume the milk of our very own species, but seems perfectly natural to eat that of a completely different species? In light of that, why do we kiss and exchange saliva with each other, but not with cows?

Posted by pox | June 8, 2007 1:28 PM

@6 - if that doesn't make it into the next Strangercrombie, I will be very disappointed.

Posted by Levislade | June 8, 2007 1:31 PM

Charles Mudede already has a line of credit set up with Petit Singly...

Posted by Big Sven | June 8, 2007 1:33 PM

Cows are GREAT kissers, pox. Don't be close-minded.

Posted by Katelyn | June 8, 2007 1:34 PM

Gross. But if someone offered I would probably try it. Heh.

Posted by Carollani | June 8, 2007 1:36 PM

How in the world did you find the failed paneer recipe? I could see a few of my clients trying some such thing, but not blogging about it.

As for the placenta jerky, haven't had a mom yet consume her placenta raw, cooked or jerkified. However, one woman, an acupuncturist, said that she was going to dry hers, grind it into powder which she would put in capsules and use during menopause. This was a suggested treatment according to some Eastern medicine she had studied.

Maybe hot flashes would make one desperate enough to consume placenta?

Posted by amazonmidwife | June 8, 2007 1:37 PM

Hey, I've tasted human milk as an adult. (Yes, from an actual *BREAST*!) Maybe I should try cow saliva.

Posted by pox | June 8, 2007 1:37 PM

Also, I think the gift basket should include some nice red wine for the placenta and a bottle of white for the cheese.

Posted by Katelyn | June 8, 2007 1:42 PM

"Soylent Brie is PEOPLE!"

(I must say, I'm rather impressed someone actually got "champing at the bit" correct.)

Posted by GrammarCop | June 8, 2007 1:43 PM

Breast milk is food. Bile is not. Just pointing out the obvious, I've never tasted any breast milk but my own, but the kids dig it. It's sort of a food incest taboo... not something that's intrinsically gross.

Posted by jkjk | June 8, 2007 2:01 PM

"Soylent Brie is PEOPLE!"

20 points.

Posted by sniggles | June 8, 2007 2:26 PM

"champing at the bit"

Thank you, thank you, thank you. This makes up least some small fraction of your annoying Slog comments.

Posted by Bison | June 8, 2007 2:31 PM

HERE's what you add to the gift basket: Vaginal yeast beer!

Posted by Madashell | June 8, 2007 2:32 PM

Just the boobs, please.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | June 8, 2007 2:36 PM

I'll take a nice chianti with that placenta.

Posted by keshmeshi | June 8, 2007 3:37 PM

How long before this stuff shows up on Fear Factor?

Posted by lilblackcat | June 8, 2007 4:17 PM

I thing Jungfraumilch would be the wine of choice...

Posted by Joe | June 8, 2007 5:45 PM

Don't forget fried testicles. A rare treat; we can collect them from the few treanswomen and eunuchs who would willingly give them up. :-)

Posted by Sachi | June 8, 2007 6:12 PM

this is incredibly interesting because i have been talking about this for a couple years now as somewhat of a joke, but it never made sense to me why we were cool with drinking/using another animal's milk but not our own. hmm... i wonder if it tastes good....

Posted by elizabeth | June 9, 2007 6:51 PM


Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 3:13 PM


Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 3:14 PM


Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 3:14 PM

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