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I'd like to make a deal with Mr. Bush. He can continue in a ceremonial role for the duration of his term: Salute the Marines, greet schoolchildren, turn on the WH Xmas tree - stuff like that.

But he needs to shut the fuck up. Just shut the fuck up. No more of his mispronounciations, no more of his voice of doom, no more of his pseudo-folksy bullshit. No more of his Wal-Mart version of Christianity. Just shut the fuck up. Smile and wave George - the non-retarded need to clean up your big national diaper.

Do you think he'd accept the proposal?

Posted by Tired of President Retard | January 10, 2007 11:00 PM

Fact check - that's not a battleship the Chimpster was strutting on, it was an aircraft carrier.

Other than that, 100% dead on. History will not be kind to Shrub/Cheneyco and their minions...

Posted by Mr. X | January 11, 2007 2:19 AM

If that bad man really believed anything he said, he would send his two daughters in to rebuild Iraq and protect the homeland. Where are those girls? We don't see them on tv, People magazine, or even the checkout tabloids. If they can get pictures of Cher's cellulite and two-headed alligators, it can't be that hard to snap the Bush girls.

Posted by boy | January 11, 2007 2:30 AM

Good rundown. Thanks, Eli.

I watched the speech at a bar with closed captioning. I recommend it for further presidental speeches (on going to war with Iran, etc). Not having to listen to his voice made hearing the bullshit he had to say much, much easier.

Posted by Brie | January 11, 2007 6:56 AM

So then, what are the options other than FINALLY sending in enough troops to secure and hold Baghdad?

1 - Remain with current levels.
2 - Phased pullout.
3 - Immediate pullout.

To leave Iraq in a lurch after the mess we've made would bring about a horrific Islamic terrorist power with tons of ethnic cleansing. I'm sorry to say that there is no alternative other than to give this surge our best shot. Where is my logic failing here?

Posted by Chip Chipmunk | January 11, 2007 9:42 AM

Tired of President Retard, good point but the President needs to stop saluting soldiers PERIOD! This tradition was started by Ronald Reagan in an attempt to play soldier for some weird reason. Prior to that, the Presidents never saluted the military; including President's Washington and Eisenhower.

The reason for not saluting the military was a show of the our military being under civilian leadership. Oddly, the only other world leaders that salute their respective militaries are military dictatorships.

So maybe Bush should salute the military after all.....

Posted by Andrew | January 11, 2007 9:43 AM

We need an STFU Bush shirt.

Posted by Will in Seattle | January 11, 2007 9:57 AM

@5 - the only real option is to leave. It will never be easier than today, it will just get worse the longer we stay. And why aren't you and your kids over there serving? When the Bush twins and Cheney's kid serves in a combat unit in Iraq outside of the Green Zone, then I'll listen, but until then I'll rely on my own experience in counter-terrorism operations. So, STFU and go enlist.

Posted by Will in Seattle | January 11, 2007 10:00 AM

John Kerry's 1971 Senate Foriegn Relations Committee testimony keeps replaying in my head.

Posted by DOUG. | January 11, 2007 10:06 AM

Chip, you present four options. They will all achieve exactly the same result: chaos, Iraqi agony, American shame, and a new foothold for further 9/11 attacks. These are the options faced by a condemned man: hanging, firing squad, gas, collapsing wall, lethal injection. You choose, but the result is the same.

Posted by Fnarf | January 11, 2007 10:18 AM

So what is your recommendation, Fnarf?

As for American Shame, I think it's appropriate. We should be good and ashamed of the spectacle we've made of ourselves.

Posted by catalina vel-duray | January 11, 2007 10:35 AM

Shame is the word. This "president" has brought one embarassment after another, and there is nothing (realistically) that can be done.

Dan Savage said it best (paraphrasing): this war is going to bloody, horrific & long; or bloody horrific & short. Unfortuantely, it looks like there is pretty much no hope for the latter...

Posted by Mike in MO | January 11, 2007 12:11 PM

Savage on the war is a ass.

Posted by rodrigo | January 11, 2007 2:42 PM

Has anyone else seen the fake crying pics of Bush for the speech - talk about an attempt to sell us ... they're preloading them on yahoo now ...

Posted by Will in Seattle | January 11, 2007 5:13 PM

Well, if we really believed in "Iraqi Democracy" we'd respond to the Iraqi opinion polls that say something over 80% want the U.S. to just fucking leave already. That sounds like the best solution to me. We've killed enough innocents there already.
But of course, that wouldn't achieve the U.S. & Saudi Arabia's secret goals, now would it?

As to boy @3's question about the Bush girls, they're either in Paraguay on Bush's 10,000 acre compound there. (Wtf, indeed.)
Or they're getting their purse stolen in Argentina.

Posted by treacle | January 11, 2007 6:00 PM

*100,000 acre (40,500 hectare) compound.

Posted by treacle | January 11, 2007 6:01 PM

Simplistic advocates (Bush, Chip
above, others) portray our policy
decisions as how do we achieve
some predefined, often
unrealistic, goal in Iraq.
Saying "Failure is not an option"
is idiotic. The situation in Iraq
is clearly a failure, and will
remain a failure, no matter
despite such macho posturing.
Intelligent action in Iraq will
come in realizing the US has many
problems (Iraq, Afghanistan,
credibility, corruption, energy,
health, education, debt, the
environment, etc.) and using our
resources to address them in a
balanced manner. Wasting all our
resources in Iraq, so chimpy can
feel good about himself, is
probably the least effective means
of improving our overall

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