Posted by news intern Garrett McCulloch

Captured: Tukwila police shoot a suspect in the Officer Timothy Brenton killing after he pulled a gun on them. The suspect is in critical condition.

The Procession: Hundreds of police cars snaked through the city on their way to Brenton's KeyArena memorial.

Hurtling Toward Decisive: McGinn jumped further ahead in both of yesterday's ballot drops, and now leads by 1.4 percent (2,384 votes). But no concession from Mallahan.

The Power of Prayer: It probably won't be enough to reject R-71.

More Shooting News: Few answers about Fort Hood gunman; one dead and eight injured after shooting spree in an Orlando office building.

Abortion, Democrats and Cowardice: House Democrats back down, likely will end up with a health care bill amendment that prohibits coverage for elective abortions.

And Guess Who'll Be in D.C. for the Vote: The usual dumbfucks throwing teabags around.

How Unemployed are You? U.S. unemployment rate is at 10.9 percent—over 10 percent for the first time since 1983. But it's kinda really 17.5 percent.

Crying in French: Apparently babies start to learn their parents' language super-early.

Today in Bigoted Douchebags: The battle to release R-71 petition signers continues after the election.

The Swine Flu: The vaccine's on its way to King County, but now the virus will kill your pets!

Your Phone's NOT your only friend! A study says technology doesn't isolate people but expands social contact.

Wearing Out Our Welcome: Many Afghan people have had enough of us Americans.

Kent, Washington: Number one in space elevators!

Microsoft Wins: Microsoft Messenger and the company's other sites led time spent online in September.

Microsoft Loses: But the Xbox 360 is no longer cool with the kids.

Continuing the Looney Tunes with the best one ever:

This time in Orlando. One person is dead and at least eight people are injured after a shooter terrorized several floors of a Florida office building.

MSNBC says that Jason Rodriguez, a former employee in the building, is a suspect in the case. The shooter is still at large.

Police Sgt. Barbara Jones identified the suspect as Jason Rodriguez, 40, a former employee in the building who she said was believed to be at large and armed. Rodriguez was believed to be wearing a light-blue polo shirt and blue jeans and driving a silver 2002 Nissan sport-utility vehicle with Florida plates D119UX, authorities said.

A witness told WESH that the shooter had not worked there in more than a year. She was whisked away by police before she could say more.

Thanks to Slog Tipper Lacking Creativity.

Sad:

Family and friends of a Fayetteville family were expected to gather at Snyder Memorial Baptist Church Friday for a shared memorial service. Police said William "Billy" Maxwell Jr., 47, shot and killed his wife, Kathryn Maxwell, 43, daughter Connor Maxwell, 17, and son Cameron Maxwell, 15, before turning the gun on himself Monday evening.

The family was well known at the church, where, friends said, the siblings were involved in the youth ministry and the youth choir, and their father was a deacon.

Fort Hood Shootings: 13 dead, 3128 injured. After all the muddled reports yesterday, it appears that there was one shooter, Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, 39, and he was about to be deployed to Afghanistan. He is still alive.

10.2%! Unemployment hits a 26-year high.

Seattle Mourns: The funeral for murdered police officer is today and will stretch from the U District to Key Arena.

Election Results 1: More results came in at 4:30 yesterday, and Mallahan and McGinn are still too close to call.

Election Results 2: But at least R-71 has won.

Republicans "Unveil" "Health Care Plan": Was yesterday's teabagging in the Capitol supposed to be cover? While angry right-wing dickheads were tearing up the Dem's health care bill, the Republicans issued their plan. Unremarkably, their plan sucks.

Murder: After the murder of a homeless man in a transient camp, Seattle police have arrested a suspect.

The Taliban Has More Keys Than a Locksmith: A "key Taliban" town has fallen to Pakistani forces.

America's Goodwill Ambassadors: Wal-Mart wants to open more stores in India.

Will This Fuck Over Joe Lieberman? If So, I'm for It: Ned Lamont considering run for Connecticut governor.

Some Americans Want to Do This, Too: Somali adulterer stoned to death.

Best Fox News Headline Ever: "I'm Tired of Hating President Obama."

And now, to celebrate my last day on Morning News for a while, you have two options for your Morning Looney Tunes. You could watch this Foghorn Leghorn beauty:

Or you could watch "Hillbilly Hare", the hilarious, derogatory-to-Southerners Bugs Bunny cartoon, which is after the jump:

(You can read the earlier post about the shootings at Ford Hood here.)

An Army representative at Ford Hood has announced that the shootings have left 12 dead and 31 wounded. The shooting took place in the Soldier Readiness Facility, where soldiers prepare to be shipped out. The shooter, a soldier, was killed in a shootout with police. Texas police apprehended two other soldiers who may have been involved with the shooting.

UPDATE: "The gunman, who was still alive after being shot four times, was identified by law enforcement authorities as Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, 39..."

Post by news intern Garrett McCulloch

Good news for all of us without (paying) jobs. Congress extended unemployment benefits today. Only 12 of the most dickish Republicans voted against it. Dicks.

The extra 14 weeks means that ye of no jobs can collect the dole for a total of 99 weeks. It gets better. In the 20 states with unemployment rates higher than 8.5 percent—like Washington, which was 9.2 percent unemployed last month—you get 105 weeks of unemployment benefits under the new law. White House spies say Obama will sign the bill into law tomorrow.

Got a job and a substantial pile of cash? The bill also extends the income-tax credit for first-time home buyers until April of next year, and it creates a smaller credit for homeowners buying a new home.

Posted by news intern Garrett McCulloch

Cops are on high alert after the Saturday killing of Officer Timothy Brenton. Seattle filmmaker Lynn Shelton, a 2008 Stranger Genius Award winner and the woman behind Humpday, is the latest person to stare down a barrel of multiple police guns after arousing suspicion Tuesday night while filming near Northgate. From Scott Sunde at the seattlepi.com:

They rigged lights, filmed and ate burritos on the hood of the car.

"I don't know at what point the officer saw us. Something about us made him very worried," Shelton said in the interview. "He didn't want to pull us over until he had tons of backup."

So police didn't stop the car until it was near the Woodland Park Zoo. By then, there was backup by the tons: several police cars, officers with guns drawn and flashlights on, commands being delivered over a loudspeaker. [...]

"The one I spoke to was very professional and very kind," Shelton said.

"They said, 'We're sorry if we freaked you out.' "

A little advice to everyone with a light gray sedan—or a video camera in the wrong place: The next couple weeks might be a good time to avoid looking suspicious. Except the guy who shot officer Brenton: May he or she or they look very suspicious wherever they go.

UPDATE: Seattle Police now have a more specific description of the car they're looking for, the Seattle Times reports. It's a white or light beige 1980 to 1983 Datsun 210 coupe.

Targeting Cops: Someone left a threatening note when they burned three police cars on October 22nd; is it connected to the Halloween shooting? What about this guy, who was arrested at the Lock and Keel Tavern in Ballard after making suspicious comments about the police?

Suspicious Fires: There were three fires this morning, and two of them were near the big Greenwood fire on October 23rd.

We Still Don't Have a Mayor: Here are the most recent election results

Too Little, Too Late: The swine flu shots will be coming in small doses through December and January.

It Was a Bad Halloween: Three people from Kent are charged with breaking into a South Seattle home and breaking the neck of someone inside.

We'll Be Fighting This Battle Forever: The health care bill is being held up again, this time over abortion.

All Over but the Shoutin': The Republican party casts their paltry two gubernatorial victories as a 'renaissance,' but will infighting destroy the GOP before next year?

We'd Better Win Some More Seats Next Year: The Senate pushes through greenhouse gas bill without Republican help.

Boat of Mass Destruction: Israel displays an enormous stockpile of weapons found on a boat, claim they're Iranian.

Infiltration: Have the Taliban taken over the Afghanistani Afghani police?

Asking for a Hot Pound Injection: The Bank of England adds to the British stimulus package.

That's so Sweet! Will She Bring All Her Stuffed Animals? Michelle Bachmann to hold tea party inside the Capitol building today. She hilariously refers to this as a "Super Bowl of Freedom."

Of Course This Happened in Florida: Seven month old baby who was missing for days is found alive underneath the babysitter's bed.

A Sporting Event Occurred: Yankees win the World Series.

And now, your morning Looney Tunes:

And that tells you everything you need to know about cyclists, according to the commenters over at the PI. I wonder what they'll say the first time a Seattle motorist strikes a pedestrian. We'll just have to wait and see.

Did you follow the election results last night on Slog? We slaved over a hot blog for you for hours and hours!

Ref. 71: Gay everything-but-marriage is winning.

McGinn and Mallahan: Too close to call, with McGinn in a slight lead.

I-1033: Lost.

Assholes in Maine: Voted down gay marriage.

Dow Constantine: Won.

Pete Holmes: Won.

Mike O'Brien: Won.

Sally Bagshaw: Won.

Jessie Israel: Lost.

Richard Conlin: Won.

Rob Holland and Tom Albro: Winning.

Also: The housing levy passed.

And: Did you know Seattle has an "Eastside"? And that something called a "Kirkland" is now the second-biggest city on that "Eastside" because it ate three other cities last night? It's apparently true!

New Jersey and Virginia: Now have Republican governors.

Bill Owens: The Democrat running against the Glenn-Beck-and-Sarah-Palin endorsed Conservative Party candidate in upstate New York won.

Obama: Polling indicates the Republican gubernatorial wins weren't about him.

But, Wait: Did the Democratic base collapse?

Kalamazoo Gay Rights Law: Passes.

Chapel Hill, NC: Elects openly gay mayor.

Houston: Could elect their very first lesbian mayor.

And It's Not All Elections, All the Time: "Rogue" Afghan cop kills five British soldiers.

Caught on Tape? Police are watching hours of in-car video to try to find hints of the cop killer's identity.

T-Mobile Blackout: T-Mobile has fixed last night's collapse of T-Mobile phones, but now they wonder what happened.

Battle of the Brains: George W. Bush, Bill Clinton to debate current events early next year.

And now, your daily Looney Tunes:

Vote Today: Here are our endorsements.

Vote or We Will End Up Like This: Hamid Karzai hilariously vows to fight corruption in Afghanistan.

Seriously, Motherfucker, Vote Today: Three elections could indicate where our country is, one year after electing Obama.

Mourning and Waiting: A community waits as the police seek the person who killed one of their own.

Ding, Dong, the Witch Is Dead?: Has Lieberman dropped his bid to filibuster health care reform? He denies it.

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha: Republicans are set to unveil their own health care reform plan later this week. (Note that they're waiting until after the election to do it.)

"I cannot take part in something that has been bad from the start": Radovan Karadzic suddenly remembers that humans have rights, refuses to appear before war crimes tribunal.

Calm Down: Hillary Clinton tries again to appease Arab complaints.

Too Hot for eBay?: Drawings that glorified the slaying of an abortion doctor have been removed from online bidding.

Try Moving Your Ass Now: Philadephia transit workers go on strike

Deliberating: The jury's out on the Nancy Floren murder case.

U.S. Factory Orders: Up for the fifth time in six months.

Nokia: Laying off 6,000.

And now, your daily Looney Tunes:

Officer Down: One Seattle police officer has been murdered and a trainee was injured. SPD is on the case.

A Fair and Balanced Election: The runoff has been scrapped and Karzai "wins" a new term in Afghanistan.

Yeahbuwha? Ford posts $997 million third-quarter profit, their first profitable quarter in North America in four years.

And, in Car News That Makes Sense: Seattle to get 2,500 electric car charging stations.

Pending Home Sales: At "highest level in 3 years."

Health Care: "After months of plodding work," things are looking up?

Climate Bill: Facing some trouble in the Senate.

Pay to Play? Did the New York Times pay millions to free their reporter from the Taliban?

There Is an Election Tomorrow: In New York, the Republican is backing the Democrat. and in NJ and VA, the Democrats are struggling to hold on to governor'ss' seats.

A Stern Talking-To: Arab leaders will confront Clinton about what they perceive to be a major change in U.S. foreign policy.

35 Dead: Suicide bomber attacks Pakistan's Army Headquarters.

Bailey/Coy Books: The beloved Broadway institution is closing.

For Thee, My Friend, For Thee: King Street Station could be getting its time-tolling bells back.

And now, your Daily Looney Tunes:

Posted by news intern Garrett McCulloch

Shot: Seattle Police officer killed in Leschi late last night. Police are still looking for suspects.

Sham? Rival to Afghan President Hamid Karzai drops out of presidential race.

Scam: Ponzi schemer Bernie Madoff's documents show he managed to go on so long because SEC regulators didn't really try to investigate.

The Republicans: New York Congressional race shows they're not really sure what direction they're going.

The Secret Republican: The Seattle Times compares Susan Hutchison to Mike McGinn. Because they're "outsiders" or "insurgents" or something.

He'd Be Funny If He Didn't Kind Of Want to Make Us Explode: Iranian Crazy President Ahmadinejad says the country's enemies are "a mosquito," and that Iran is the one with the power in nuclear dealings.

This is What We Call "Tough Talk" in the Northwest: U.S. Sen. Patty Murray says she "won't be as inclined" to give stuff to Boeing after they moved some of their production to South Carolina. That'll show 'em!

Flu Vaccine: Hey, we might end up having enough of it!

Uh, Congratulations? Alaskan Way Viaduct shows no signs of further damage.

Posted by news intern Garrett McCulloch

Pay Up, Joe's Friends: PAC supporting Mallahan fined $5,000 for not reporting $100,000 or so in contributions.

So The Banks Can Fuck You Over Slightly Less Severely: Democratic leaders in Congress are pushing for tighter rules on bank overdrafts.

Business on "Business Candidate" Mallahan: They'd rather have the other guy.

Yeah, That'll Fix Everything: The solution to "plagued with uncertainty" Pioneer Square? Hang some banners from stuff that say it's Pioneer Square, I guess.

You Know What? Fuck Him: Sen. Joe Lieberman hints at more douchebaggery in 2010, saying he "probably will support some Republican candidates for Congress."

They're Trying to Set Canada on Fire! The Olympic torch crossed into Victoria, B.C. yesterday.

Ooh, Their Politicians Are Crooked Too: Former French President Jacques Chirac headed to trial, accused of handing public money over to his friends.

It's Cool, It Was Just Some Stupid Workers: Oil company BP will challenge an $87.4 million fine handed down for a refinery explosion that killed 15 employees.

Obama on the HIV Travel Ban: It's no more.

Hey, Go Get a Flu Shot, You Communist: CDC says only half of the people who most need swine flu vaccine are getting it.

Websites Without Letters: Well, letters from our alphabet at least—the internet's governing body will start to allow domain names with non-Latin characters.

Well. They Never Invited ME: White House visitors list released. Surprise! It's famous people and business executives.

Fourth-Biggest to Fail This Year, If You're Counting: California National Bank the latest seized by the feds.

Isn't Real Botox Bad Enough? Salon owner found guilty of giving fake anti-wrinkle injections.

And After All Your Costumed Shenanigans Tonight: Don't forget to set your clocks back an hour.

Ka-chingggg! Pakistani forces uncover Taliban 9/11 documents.

Tegucigalpals. Hondurans stop arguing!

Pakistanks for the Memories? Hillary returns from Pakistan, is less than impressed.

Snap! Seven democrats representatives investigated for ethics violations.

Nobody Wins. Sounders tie.

I Have Nothing Funny to Say About This. Hutchison and Constantine announce transition team, advisers.

Or This. (Dow Constantine: Joke Killer?) Suburban papers endorse Constantine.

Click on the Link and Look at This Man's Face, Please. Elderly man found safe.

Is Trick or Treating Dangerous? Time dares to ask the stupidest question ever.

But the Sky Is SO Big! Coast Guard plane collides with Marine helicopter over Pacific Ocean.

Not If the Murder Weapon Is Diabetes! Defense Attorney says client is too fat to kill.

Spoiler Alert: It'll Happen Next Year Too. Colorado, a snowy place, is covered in snow.

She Will Now Kick Swine Flu to Death in the Nads. Dr. Regina Benjamin confirmed as Surgeon General.

That Belongs in a Museum! Despite best efforts of Nazi Party and evil mining magnate Walter Donovan, world's largest rubberband ball heads to Orlando for exhibition.

And, finally. Fart Friday.

This is distressing. And it's not going to end well for the skinnies, I think. A widening majority* of people in the UK are either overweight or obese and if this crap keeps up or gets worse it's only a matter of time before roving gangs of obese people start beating the shit out of waifs and skinnies and gym queens. You can only oppress the majority population for so long before they rebel and revenge themselves on their oppressors.

* The number of overweight and obese people keeps growing and there was no way to make that clear without it looking like a dig. Take your pick: "a growing majority," "an ever-larger majority," "a widening majority." How do you describe the rising prevalence of overweight and obese people while avoiding big-and-getting-bigger qualifiers that look like insults?

Don't Get All Excited—The Economy Still Sucks. But it sucked a little less this quarter!

See You Tomorrow in Communist Reprogramming Camp. Senate House Democrats unveil health care bill.

"We Have Captured Two Old British People." Somali pirate really knows how to sell it.

This Doesn't Mean You Can Stop Washing Your Hands. Drugmakers on track to meet H1N1 vaccine demand.

Awesome. Now How About Equal Rights? Obama signs hate crime bill.

Shenanigans! Hillary Clinton calls bullshit on Pakistan.

Can't You *69 These People or Something? "We have new plans and tactics for attacks to disrupt the elections," Taliban spokesman vows.

I Have Such a Boner for You Guys. Scandinavian countries better than everyone else at gender equality.

Awwwwww. India withdraws some troops from Kashmir in the name of peace.

It's Like the Really Hard Math Problem Version of No Child Left Behind! Washington state's math tests apparently really, really hard.

Understandable. Union machinists feel "betrayed" by Boeing.

Tom Carr Doesn't Care About Black People. City Attorney tries to shut down Angie's.

Gun Gun Gun! Gun people sue city over gun ban banning their guns.

Can't That Horrible Goblin Tim Eyman Go Fuck Up Somebody Else's State? Washington Republicans hate 1033 as much as the rest of us.

Good Biiiiiiiiird. Fart Thursday.

Arnold Schwarzenegger recently vetoed Assembly Bill 1176, and as the San Francisco Bay Guardian points out, the Governor's letter to the bill's sponsor, Tom Ammiano, appears to be more than just your typical rejection letter...

The whole story is here.

And It Was Her Birthday This Week, Too. Car bomb kills 90 in Pakistan during Hillary Clinton's visit.

Mouseketerrorists. Two Chicago men charged in "Mickey Mouse" terror plot against Danish newspaper.

It's Fine. The Opposition Party Just, Um, Ran Into a Door. Zimbabwe cancels visit from UN torture investigator.

"We Made Sure the Door Was Locked. I Actually Put My Wife in the Cupboard to Hide, and Made the Room Look as if It Wasn't Occupied." Taliban militants kill 12 in Kabul UN guesthouse attack.

"Then I Got a New Job and Moved the Fuck Away from Afghanistan." How my first-hand account of the guesthouse attack would go.

Tony Blair for President of Earth. "Oh, hell naw," say opponents.

I Guess Scarecrow-Astronaut Doesn't Pay Very Much. Mallahan campaign raises $110,000; still $106,000 in debt.

Hey, Everyone Ever. Shit or get off the pot.

Tell Them About Your Tennis Shoes Again. Patty Murray makes "one more attempt" to convince Boeing to open 787 production line in Everett.

Vaccinate Your Children. Woman "overcome by Phillies fever" attempts to exchange sex for World Series tickets.

Euthanize Your Children. Police arrest three more suspects in horrific teen gang rape.

Just Not a Lot of Opportunities in Hulking These Days. Hulk Hogan to return to pro wrestling.

WHAT IS YOUR DEFINITION OF "FINE"? Crew members on This Is It describe their shock at Michael Jackson's death.

WHAT IS YOUR DEFINITION OF "KIDNAPPED BY PIRATES"? Family of missing British couple "not grossly over-worried."

"Bingo." Protagonist scrolls intensely through microfilm.

You love it. Stop crying. Fart Wednesday.

Extra depressing to read this...

Eight American troops were killed in two separate bomb attacks Tuesday in southern Afghanistan, making October the deadliest month of the war for U.S. forces since the 2001 invasion to oust the Taliban.

...right after reading this:

But last month, in a move that has sent ripples all the way to the White House, Hoh, 36, became the first U.S. official known to resign in protest over the Afghan war, which he had come to believe simply fueled the insurgency. "I have lost understanding of and confidence in the strategic purposes of the United States' presence in Afghanistan," he wrote Sept. 10 in a four-page letter to the department's head of personnel.... [Many] Afghans, he wrote in his resignation letter, are fighting the United States largely because its troops are there—a growing military presence in villages and valleys where outsiders, including other Afghans, are not welcome and where the corrupt, U.S.-backed national government is rejected. While the Taliban is a malign presence, and Pakistan-based al-Qaeda needs to be confronted, he said, the United States is asking its troops to die in Afghanistan for what is essentially a far-off civil war.

Farty Farty Fart Fart. Senate health care bill will include a public option.

Smelt It, Dealt It? Al Qaeda-affiliated group wants credit for Baghdad bombings.

Said the Rhyme, Did the Crime. Israel demolishes two Palestinian houses; "unhelpful," says U.S.

Too Busy Farting, I Suspect. UN "scaling back expectations" on reaching a climate change treaty any time soon.

Hey, Who Beefed? Speculation abounds about the timing of the viaduct simulation release.

Silent But Deadly. NYC will begin vaccinating school kids for H1N1.

Natural Gas. Obama to announce high-tech, energy efficient utility plan.

Butt Trumpet. Radovan Karadzic boycotts his own war crimes trial.

Smell Ron Hubbard. Paris court finds Church of Scientology guilty of fraud.

Foul Play. British couple out yachting in Indian Ocean captured by Somali pirates.

You've Got to be Farting Me. Times says print circulation is up now that there's no print P-I.

What's That Smell? Oh, it's just the continuing decline of newspapers everywhere.

Ha Ha! Farts Are Totally Relevent on This One! Stop eating meat and halt climate change, says fancy economist.

Wanna Be Fartin' Somethin'. People still like Michael Jackson a lot.

"Me Auntie Had Wind for Five Minutes." Ricky Gervais to host Golden Globes.

Thank You, Lord. It's Fart Tuesday.