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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Comedy / Conflict of Interest / Film / Drunk The Drinky Movie Show Tonight!

Posted by Lindy West on Tue, Aug 23, 2011 at 2:02 PM

"You Don't Have To Be A Drunken Movie Fan to Enjoy this Show, But Yes You Do."

That's the tagline for the Drinky Movie Show (Sunset Tavern, 9 pm), "an alcohol-soaked descent into film nerd madness." Anchored by the prodigious talents (and drinking problems) of hosts Travis Vogt, Kevin Clarke, and Derek Sheen, tonight's Drinky Movie Show will also feature Level-6 Mage Mike Drucker and grumpy nugget of delight Elicia Sanchez. In case you're a dummy who doesn't know anything, those are five of the funniest people in Seattle. For serious.

Featuring short films, contests, prizes, and drink specials, this will be a full-on multimedia extravaganza that everyone can enjoy! And by "everyone" I mean "People over 21 who watch too many movies and regularly drink alcohol to excess."

Tuesday, Aug 23, Sunset Tavern, 9 pm.

I, Lindy West, will also be in the show. I will be drunk and yelling about movies. So, you know, just another day at the office.

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Thursday, August 11, 2011

Politics / Drunk Costco's Liquor Initiative Would Generate Millions in New Revenue, State Study Finds

Posted by Cienna Madrid on Thu, Aug 11, 2011 at 2:04 PM

The Costco-sponsored initiative that would make approximately 1,500 Washington grocery stores eligible to sell hard liquor would generate as much $253 million for the state and an additional $227 million for local governments over a period of six years, according to a recent state budget report. Meanwhile, annual costs to the state are estimated at only $158,600.

This report—one of many compiled by the state's Office of Financial Management, as Eli noted earlier—cautions that it's hard to pinpoint the precise revenue impacts of Costco's Initiative 1183 because—aside from license fees—the bulk of the state's revenue would be largely determined by liquor prices set by retailers. But according to the report, liquor revenues could increase by as much as $42 million annually for the state and $38 million for local municipalities, over the course of six years. Those numbers don't take into account an additional net $28.4 million from selling off the Washington's liquor distribution center.

If approved by voters in November, I-1183 would make all grocery outlets with more than 10,000 square feet of retail space eligible to sell liquor (a grandfather clause in the initiative also allows current state-run stores to continue operating, if they so choose). The report notes that this would likely increase the number of liquor stores operating in the state from roughly 360 to 1,428, and jump sales of liquor (by the liter) an additional five percent (on top of the predicted annual sales growth of three percent).

If Washington voters approve I-1183, retailers could begin selling liquor on June 1, 2012.

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Thursday, August 4, 2011

Crime / Drunk Anonymous Cartoonist Mocks Local Police, Now Faces Criminal Investigation

Posted by Cienna Madrid on Thu, Aug 4, 2011 at 12:14 PM

Renton law enforcement are accusing an anonymous cartoonist—known only as Mr. Fiddlesticks—of criminal cyberstalking for making eight embarrassing, funny video parodies that appear to skewer the Renton police. Court documents state that the videos "did not mention a specific city or police department, but several comments made in the videos were linked to past sexual relationships, internal investigations, rumors, and accusations of sexual orientation within the City of Renton."

The videos—which have since been removed from Youtube.com—also mention "officers having sex on duty... sleeping while on duty, throwing somebody off a bridge." (KiroTV has two of the videos uploaded on their website.) Meanwhile, First Amendment law experts say the city's accusations of cyberstalking are dubious.

From KiroTV.com:

“The cyberstalking angle doesn't pass the laugh test," Balasubramani [a cyber-law and constitutional lawyer] told KIRO-TV. "It's a serious stretch and I'd be surprised if somebody looked at it and realistically thought these acts actually fit the statute and we could make somebody criminally liable."

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Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Crime / Drunk Too Drunk to Drive, Police Report Says, but Not Too Drunk to Slash His Friend's Face

Posted by Unpaid Intern on Wed, Aug 3, 2011 at 1:24 PM

Posted by news intern Peter Johnson.

An innocent Saturday night of drinking unexpectedly turned into a harrowing home knife assault, according to a police report filed by SPD Officer Matthew J. Blackburn. The officer arrived in north Capitol Hill after midnight to find an injured couple holed up in their apartment.

According to the report, the trouble had begun when the man and woman arrived at their apartment after a night spent drinking. Blackburn writes that the residents invited friend they had been drinking with "to sleep on their couch as they felt he was too drunk to drive."

The would-be house guest had other ideas, however. The guest reportedly "became agitated and demanded his keys," the report continues. At that point, Blackburn writes, the scene got ugly when the house guest "grabbed a knife from a magnetic hanger and slashed [the male resident] on the right side of the neck. ...[The female resident] began to scream and yell for both men to stop fighting. [The house guest] turned and punched her several times in the face with a closed fist. [The male resident] then forced [the dickbag] out the front door and contacted the police."

Officer Blackburn arrived to find the suspect standing in the hallway. Blackburn arrested the suspect, he writes in the report, saying the man "appeared intoxicated and [Blackburn] had trouble understanding him as he spoke." After first responders arrived, the suspect was booked into jail and the victims were treated for their injuries.

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Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Drunk Fun and/or Stupid Game: Where Did the Grey Goose Bottle on the Sidewalk Come From?

Posted by Grant Brissey on Tue, Aug 2, 2011 at 3:27 PM

Play or complain about it here!

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Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Drunk I Saw Jimmy Buffet's Flip Flop

Posted by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey on Tue, Jul 26, 2011 at 9:47 AM

So I was in historic, beautiful New Orleans last week which was OHHHHHHH-KAY and fun from what I remember (which admittedly isn't a lot, thanks to an eventual onset of alcohol poisoning). However! A definite highlight was laying bloodshot eyes on this: JIMMY BUFFET'S HAT AND FLIP FLOP!!

Spotted this in a Parrot Head bar on Bourbon Street named "Tropical Island" or something like that. Again, don't remember much about any of it. Thankfully I had enough forethought to snap a few more pics which you can see after the jump.

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Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Two-Block Radius / Chow / Drunk What Will You See While Drinking at Cure?

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Tue, Jul 12, 2011 at 12:18 PM

blog.cureseattle.com
From the inside out on a rainy day.

Small, cute (but not cutesy!) Cure is a brand-new bar with good snacks and lots of windows on the west side of Capitol Hill's Cal Anderson Park—right across that funny little street from the tennis and basketball courts, just up from Rock Box.

What will you see while drinking there? Here's what I said:

The location of Cure—on the west side of Capitol Hill's Cal Anderson Park—means that while you drink and eat, you might see people playing basketball (sweaty, sexy) or bike polo (fascinating teetering) or adult dodgeball (should be a contradiction in terms)...

But commenter taint disagrees:

"The location of Cure—on the west side of Capitol Hill's Cal Anderson Park—means that while you drink and eat, you might see people shitting in the bushes, giving each other toothless blowjobs near the bathroom, and washing their filthy asses in the kid's wading pool".

there, fixed that for ya.

For the record, I've walked and rode my bike countless times through Cal Anderson Park (it's in the two-block radius, so I can't go anywhere else)...

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Friday, July 8, 2011

Boom / Drunk Allegedly Drunk Man Allegedly Shoots Fireworks Into a Crowd

Posted by Unpaid Intern on Fri, Jul 8, 2011 at 3:29 PM

Posted by news intern Peter Johnson.

Thousands of Seattle residents celebrated the 4th of July by lighting off a few fireworks or enjoying the grand, choreographed fireworks display at Gasworks Park. And for most people, the celebration ends there. But each year, an unlucky few are branded by patriotism, such as one woman admitted to a Seattle hospital for treatment of a fireworks burn to her face, according to a police report.

The incident happened following the fireworks show at Gasworks Park. According to the report, a crowd of forty or fifty people went to a nearby alley to continue their party at which point one reveler, who witnesses described as "very intoxicated," tried to contribute to the party by shooting off a firework.

Sadly, his aim was off. Instead of firing the explosive into the air, the man allegedly fired four volleys from a firework into the crowd of partygoers and "struck [one victim] in the face, causing burns." Specifically, the report notes the victim suffered a "dime size burn with broken skin to lower left side of face" and "powder burn marks surrounding dime size burn."

The report also notes that, "the suspect apologized." One witness speculated that "because of [the suspect's] intoxication level, he did not have full control of the fireworks."

Following the incident, the suspect's girlfriend drove a carload of people—including the suspect and his alleged burn victim—to the emergency room, where she was treated for her face burns. The victim later told officers that she didn't want to press charges, she only wanted the suspect to cover her medical expenses. The report doesn't state if the officers were able to locate the suspect.

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Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Two-Block Radius / Chow / Drunk An Excellent Idea for Right Now

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Wed, Jul 6, 2011 at 4:00 PM

The location of Cure—on the west side of Capitol Hill's Cal Anderson Park—means that while you drink and eat, you might see people playing basketball (sweaty, sexy) or bike polo (fascinating teetering) or adult dodgeball (should be a contradiction in terms). Watching others exert themselves while you're drinking, say, a glass of Chateau Bas rosé is very satisfying. Cure's other remedies for sobriety (their motto: "Vinum remedium es") include prosecco, a grüner veltliner, a Barbera, and more, $7 to $9 a glass. There are also cocktails...

Friday, June 24, 2011

Chow / Drunk Stella Caffe No More, But More Diller Room

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Fri, Jun 24, 2011 at 4:40 PM

Kelly O / The Stranger
Rob and Josie: They are so nice.

Moved up with important updateszzzzzzzzzzzz.... also here is a photo.

Sources say that downtown's Stella Caffe (beloved by Jen Graves, among others, for truly excellent espresso) is no more, and that the whole space will now be occupied by the Diller Room (beloved by me, among others, for old-timey greatness—though not by Stranger reader-reviewer shinjuko, who said in March that "It's full of douchebags all the time"—Belltown overflow, maybe?).

We've emailed proprietor Rob Wilson to find out what's up (and to tell him the Stella/Diller voicemail is full). If he gets in touch, I will ask him about the douchebag factor.

UPDATE! Trusty Chow intern Katherine Long spoke with Rob Wilson, who says Stella Caffe is indeed closed, the reason being to "financially right the ship." Wilson says, "The bar just took on a life of its own... I'm enormously grateful that it's doing so well, especially in this economy, but it still hurts me. I miss the ritual of Stella Caffe... but day and night just weren't meshing... The bar just works better."

But! He and his wife are looking to open a small cafe ("a window with 20 seats, like the old days in Sydney") in the Pike-Pine corridor. Also the Diller Room still serves espresso if you ask nicely, and they're continuing to sell coffee wholesale.

Regarding the douchebag factor at the Diller Room, Wilson says, "A lot of our coffee regulars come to the Diller Room... they plan events, and meet up... It just feels like a normal bar. Right now everything else feels like walking into Axis in Belltown... We re-did the wallpaper back to the original hotel wallpaper. It feels like you're back in the old hotel."

And: "There's a pronounced anti-douchebag crowd. Sometimes we get people up from Belltown who are like, 'Where's the valet parking,' and I'm like, 'No valet parking! Shut up and have your beers!'"

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Friday, June 10, 2011

Drunk Congrats, Liberty!

Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, Jun 10, 2011 at 3:30 PM

Liberty was named one of the Top 100 American Bars by Food & Wine Magazine. That's Liberty's writeup in Food & Wine Cocktails 2011 up there. Congrats to Liberty—and congrats also to Mistral Kitchen, Rob Roy, Tavern Law, Vessel, and Zig Zag Cafe for their Food & Wine gongs. (Psst! Hey, Food & Wine! Smith belongs on the list for their Pisco Sour, as does Sun Liquor for their fanfuckingtasting Mai Tai.)

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Thursday, June 2, 2011

Crime / Two-Block Radius / Drunk Man Asks for It, Gets Punched in Face

Posted by Unpaid Intern on Thu, Jun 2, 2011 at 4:03 PM

Posted by news intern Peter Johnson.

A man lay on the ground "unresponsive and unconscious" for about 10 minutes in the Pike/Pine neighborhood at 7:35 p.m. last Saturday night, according to a Seattle police report. How did this come to be?

It all started earlier that night, reports officer Corey Williams, when the man had been walking westbound near 11th Avenue and East Pike Street "randomly pushing and shoving pedestrians." Visibly intoxicated, the man had been shoving people "without provocation or warning," said a bystander who was shoved.

The bystander told police an altercation went down like this: The drunk man had stepped into the crosswalk where he allegedly pushed yet another pedestrian. That pedestrian said, "You want a piece of me?" The drunk man reportedly replied "Yes" and then, in response, the pedestrian allegedly punched the drunk guy in the mouth.

After the puncher had fled and the downed man was found by police and medical personnel, he told Officer Williams he was "fucking wasted on scotch."

Officially, the man who punched the drunk guy is considered the assailant (even though the drunk man was pushing strangers), while the drunk guy is considered the victim. Officer Williams reports that "[the victim] was combative with medical personnel both on scene and at the hospital. [He] was yelling racial slurs at medical staff and the hospital and attempting to escape."

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Video of the Day / Drunk Lunchtime Quickie: Today In Drunk Grandmas

Posted by Kelly O on Thu, Jun 2, 2011 at 12:15 PM

You don't have to watch the whole thing, just please note Grandma at 0:29. "Nice package, HUH HA HAAA!"

See also Paula Deen's Death Donut. And, of course, the Olsen's Drug Pizza.

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Friday, May 27, 2011

Death / Celeb / Drugs / Drunk Jeff Conaway

Posted by Dan Savage on Fri, May 27, 2011 at 5:25 PM

Dead.

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Thursday, May 26, 2011

Crime / Drunk Red-Hatted Man's Advances Trigger 30-Person Melee

Posted by Unpaid Intern on Thu, May 26, 2011 at 7:00 AM

Posted by news intern Peter Johnson.

As I'm sure you're well aware, red hats are all the rage amongst a certain crowd—women who drink tea together and tour historic monuments together and are perhaps on the same menopausal cycle. But there is a sinister side to groups of people who collectively gather in public while wearing red hats, as one Seattle woman recently discovered, when she and her friends were allegedly jumped in a parking lot by two-dozen men, all of whom were wearing red hats, according to a police report.

When SPD officer Jill K. Bassett and her colleagues arrived at South Lake Union's Citrus restaurant on May 21, one of the victims explained that the tension started when she was hit on in the club by a large, red-hat-wearing man. "She indicated to him that she wasn't interested and at one point she notified security that he was bothering her and her friends (which also included [two of the assault victims])," the report states.

The man backed off—until closing time. When the woman and her companions left the club, they were allegedly jumped in the parking lot by the man and several of his red-hatted friends "because she had shunned him," the victim explained.

Once the first punch was thrown, two-dozen people allegedly joined in the fight.

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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Education / Drunk Lake Washington High School to Encourage Pot Smoking at Senior Prom

Posted by Goldy on Tue, May 24, 2011 at 9:45 AM

It's not hard to anticipate the unintended consequences of this bit of authoritarian policy: "Lake Washington HS plans alcohol test to enter prom."

Every student at Lake Washington High School's June 4 senior prom would be tested for alcohol consumption under a plan in the works by school officials — departing from the school's past practice of testing only students who showed signs of alcohol use.

"At every dance this year, there have been issues with students drinking," said Kathryn Reith, spokeswoman for the Lake Washington School District. "The principal wanted to make sure that at the prom, there was more of a deterrence."

First of all, if school officials really cared about the welfare of their students, they would test for alcohol before letting students leave the prom, rather than upon entering. We are now in the midst of the peak season for teen automobile deaths, most of it due to high school prom/graduation related drinking, and a punitive approach to the problem is not going to solve it.

Second, if they do manage to screen for alcohol at the door, and stop kids from smuggling booze in (good luck there), they'll only encourage the use of less detectable intoxicants. Just like us adult humans, teens respond to incentives, and by announcing this policy ahead of time, school officials have pretty much incentivized buzz-seeking prom-goers to turn to other drugs.

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Thursday, April 28, 2011

Chow / Drunk The Single Best Beer in the World...

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Thu, Apr 28, 2011 at 1:39 PM

...is made right here in Seattle. Read all about it.

Kelly O / The Stranger
Hint: It's Manny's!

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Thursday, April 21, 2011

Drunk One Thousand Drunk Easter Bunnies Are Coming

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Thu, Apr 21, 2011 at 3:45 PM

Slog tipper Jack writes:

1000+ people have RSVPed for a massive pub crawl on Saturday to celebrate spring and Easter. It's called Bunnarchy or the Bunny Bar Hop, and is similar to Santarchy.

You have been warned.

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Saturday, April 16, 2011

??!! / Drunk Are All Americans This Stupid, or Just Beer Drinkers?

Posted by Goldy on Sat, Apr 16, 2011 at 1:26 PM

I was given a six-pack of organic ale as a birthday present, and having never bought that brand before, was about to flip it over to see what was printed on the bottom (I mean, who doesn't?), when fortunately, the following printed warning message caught my eye:

CAUTION: Please remove bottles before reading bottom panel.

Whew! Disaster averted. Thanks beer company lawyers!

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Thursday, April 14, 2011

Drunk Headline of the Day, It's a Goddamned Miracle Edition

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Thu, Apr 14, 2011 at 11:49 AM

Next thing you know, they'll let of-age adults enjoy alcoholic beverages on picnics in parks! Well, probably not. Full press release from the gov'mint after the jump.

UPDATE! Our friend Jill says:

My farmer-buddy Wade Bennett (quoted in the press release) has been working on this for a while—it's a lottery sort of thing, which is not mentioned in the release. The pilot program will get tastings into 10 markets this summer. One of them will be in the home district of the congresswoman who sponsored the bill. PORK! The other 9 will be drawn out of a hat from markets who want to participate—Wade thinks they likely won't all be interested. If all goes well this summer, then hopefully it'll become a market standard in future years! Because DUH.

The craft cider people are really excited about it, too—it's beer, wine and hard cider, not just beer and wine.

Jill also says Wade makes the best apple brandy she's ever tasted.

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Friday, April 8, 2011

International / Drunk What He Said: War on Drugs Edition

Posted by Brendan Kiley on Fri, Apr 8, 2011 at 10:52 AM

Journalist and poet Javier Sicilia—whose 24 year-old son was killed in drug violence last month—on ending the drug war by ending prohibition in the U.S.

... "narco-trafficking has existed for a long time in our country. It is part of our life. However, since the war was unleashed as a means to exterminate it, the US, which is the grand consumer of these toxic substances, has not done anything to support us.

“The weapons that are arming organized crime and are killing our kids, our soldiers, our police, come from the US and they are not doing anything to stop them. These guns are maybe worse than any kind of drug, they are powerful, terrible and widespread,” said Sicilia.

He asked that “if the US doesn’t prosecute and put a stop to its arms industry — a legalized horror — why should we prosecute the producers of the drugs?”

This was the context of the pact he proposed: “We have to subject them to the ferocious laws of the market and treat their consumption as a public health matter and come to fundamental agreements with those who are in the black market that send the drugs to the US. The problem of their consumption is theirs, not ours.

The laws of the market are much more ferocious than the laws of the state—which is why Mexican police keep finding mass graves, including two new ones this week.

Police officers and troops examined the site of the mass grave just outside Acapulco on Wednesday, after a video was posted on the internet detailing its whereabouts...

The bodies of two murdered men were found beside the mass grave dressed in the same clothes as the men in the video. A message beside the bodies read: "The people they killed are buried here."

Grim.

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Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Drunk It's Okay—We Brought Our Inside Alcohol

Posted by Dan Savage on Tue, Apr 5, 2011 at 10:22 AM

I always use my inside voice while I drink my inside alcohol.

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Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Drunk Excellent! Someone Buy That Man a Drink!

Posted by Zeugma on Wed, Mar 23, 2011 at 8:52 AM

Or, uh, some other idiom to express my enthusiasm for this story.

A 49-year-old man is in Sullivan County Jail without bail after authorities say he showed up for a court hearing on a felony DWI charge drunk and carrying an open can of Busch beer, plus four more cans in a bag.

Also, I'd like it noted in the record that he's in jail without bail because he showed up drunk for his hearing, not because authorities said he did so. Come on, NBC New York. Standards! And Busch? Come on, drunk guy! Standards!

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Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Chow / Drunk You Really Should...

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Tue, Mar 22, 2011 at 4:36 PM

Screen_shot_2011-03-22_at_3.13.39_PM.png

www.cornichon.org

...leave work early and be at Il Bistro for a drink right at 5 o'clock. Who cares if it's only Tuesday! You work hard! You deserve it! And your drink (made by the man at right—more over here) will be great.

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Drunk Four Loko Hurt ALL of Our Hearts

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Tue, Mar 22, 2011 at 7:45 AM

...but especially this guy's (allegedly).

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Thursday, March 17, 2011

Two-Block Radius / Chow / ??!! / Drunk Happy St. Patrick's Day

Posted by Bethany Jean Clement on Thu, Mar 17, 2011 at 4:20 PM

...from the Unicorn:

St. Patrick's Day experiment #13: 4-leaf Corndog with Fancy Sauce.
Still trying stuff out.

My caption-writing skills fail in the face of this madness.

My caption-writing skills fail in the face of this madness.

More Unicorn holiday terror—Lucky Green Fries, Leprechaun Balls w/baconated cabbage—here.

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Drunk Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Posted by David Schmader on Thu, Mar 17, 2011 at 4:03 PM

Thanks for the stroll down memory lane, Copyranter. I forgot how much I missed watching a man cut soap with a knife.

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Music / Line Out / Drunk All Our Writers Down at SXSW Have Managed to Stay Out Of Jail (So Far)

Posted by Megan Seling on Thu, Mar 17, 2011 at 3:37 PM

Derek Erdman

Here's what's happened in the last 24 hours at SXSW: Kelly O saw Bad Brains and the Black Lips, Jason Baxter ate the best meal of his life, Grant Brissey had a racist cab ride, and Toby Crittenden met James Blake.

Don't give a shit about SXSW? Well that's okay! Local music-making duo Brain Fruit check in from India.

Also: It's St. Patrick's Day! So Brian Cook and Nipper have some festive music for you to listen to here and here.

Dimbleby & Capper and Night Sun get some love, too.

And you know what else today is? It's Billy Corgan's birthday! And Derek Erdman is celebrating.

There's literally a fuck-ton (fuckton?) more music-related magic here.

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Celeb / Film / Drunk Jodie Foster Defends Mel Gibson: "God, I love that man."

Posted by Lindy West on Thu, Mar 17, 2011 at 11:22 AM

Jodie Foster gave a long, personal interview to the Hollywood Reporter about strep throat, her new movie The Beaver, and Mel Gibson. It's worth a read.

“He’s so incredibly loving and sensitive, he really is,” she says. “He is the most loved actor I have ever worked with on a movie. And he’s not saintly, and he’s got a big mouth, and he’ll do gross things your nephew would do. But I knew the minute I met him that I would love him the rest of my life.”

She adds: “I know him in a very complex way. He’s a real person; he’s not a cardboard cutout. I know that he has troubles, and when you love somebody you don’t just walk away from them when they are struggling.”

Also this sentence happens:

Foster and Gibson — the yin and yang of American pop culture, its moral avatar and current nemesis — have been close friends since they met on 1994’s Maverick.

Whatever you say, Hollywood Reporter.

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