Based solely on their photo!

Both celebrate birthdays this week. Which one is more important to you, and why?

Spoken to me while a piece was being edited: "I hate editors."

That's a nice story about racist redemption and all, Charles, but instead of expensive laser treatments—or threatening to douse his face with acid—maybe the reformed Nazi sympathizer simply should've invested in a bottle of Dermablend Pro?

Via the NYTimes:

MOGADISHU, Somalia (AP) — An Islamist insurgent-run radio station in Somalia says it is awarding guns, bombs and books to three children in a Quran recital contest.

Andulus radio station is run by the al-Qaida-linked al-Shabab militia.

The station announced Monday that the first prize winner in the contest received a rifle and $700, the second prize winner got a rifle and $500, and the third prize winner received two bombs.

All three children also received religious books.

Another group of religious radicals arming kids with weapons, *yawn.* But children's books, holy fuck! The possibilities!

Curtsies to Mother.

Posted by news intern Peter Johnson.

Plenty of people feel awkward about their dad's profession. You probably wouldn't brag about your dad's most recent trip to repossess someone's house, for example. Still, that's not as bad as being Muammar al-Qadaffi's son, Saif al-Islam (who was recently captured by Libyan rebels... and escaped. Oops.) One of Saif's former classmates at the London School of Economics penned a brief remembrance about hanging out with the dictator's spawn:

At the end of the school year Saif decided to host a party for the entire class. I was contemplating whether or not to go: would socializing with a dictator’s son someday come back to haunt me? My professor was going so I decided to attend. As we were dining on lobster, our drunken professor gave a toast. He started to mention how this course was great because of Saif. Saif looked visibly touched and waiting to hear more. But the professor paused and suddenly had nothing more to say, because, in truth, there was nothing more to add. Saif never spoke in class and there was nothing about him being in the course that made it any more special, except perhaps for the lobsters.

Well, the ill-begotten oil money ain't so bad, I guess. I bet all of his friends in elementary school were totally his friends for realsies.

There's a photo of someone's shoes followed by three getting-to-know you questions. The three questions are inappropriate for summer. Based on the shoes and the answers to the questions you are supposed to guess who the person is. GOOD LUCK!

The singer ("She scratched my boob really hard—there was a wolverine wound on my boob"):

• Timothy Rysdyke

The bass player and the woman in the crowd:

• TIMOthy Rysdyke

The rapper and the self-described bon vivant:

• timothy Rysdyke

The painter and the songstress of dog-related renown:

• timothy Rysdyke

The Canadian:

• TimOthy Rysdyke

* A NOTE ABOUT THE GAME: You won't actually need good luck, because all you have to do to cheat is scroll down because you know how when you permalink to individual posts the jump goes away? Yeah. The honest among you—and you know who you are—will halt your scrolling and guess and then proceed scrolling.

Thx to my best friend Vince at Filmdrunk.

Sears shows us we were right

It's some bullshit about some "convincing Sears to remove hundreds of pornographic DVDs from its website."

To hell with with pornography—if you're citing Sears as your moral compass, you're not even worth debating.

Or something.

CNN and others are now reporting the last fifty workers are being evacuated from the Fukushima reactor complex.

I wanted to take a moment for all of us to give the respect these individuals deserve. The Fukushima Fifty stuck to their posts until the very end, despite enormous and growing risks. To this point in the story, they have remained anonymous, 'workers', in a whole slew of passive sentences—about pumps, coolant systems, fires, containment buildings and fuel rods.

They have joined a small group of human beings who have shown the strength to face a disaster of this magnitude. Even before these latest developments, and forced evacuation, theirs seemed like a suicide mission. I hope their stories turn out better than those of their brethren.

Updated: There are conflicting reports now—perhaps that the workers are returning to the plant after a brief time away. I remain even more grateful.

If the workers have to be evacuated from the plant, the next line of defense is the military—primarily at this point the US Navy. A thank you to the military families, who have already seen their family members head towards this danger.

Gaddafi's contingent of female bodyguards—the Amazonian Guard—have taken fire for him; at least one has died, according to reports.

He says he's creating opportunities for women.

Warning: It is CUTE. Not too-cute, not not-cute-enough, but just-right-cute.

MARCEL THE SHELL WITH SHOES ON from Dean Fleischer-Camp on Vimeo.

Thanks, Niki!

And when the mother of his 8-month-old daughter suggests he needs medication, he says she "needs a fucking bat in the side of the head." (He also blasts her as a "little girl with a dysfunctional cunt.")

Listen to Gibson go crazier than you've ever heard an Oscar-winning Hollywood star go before here.

Not his wife... until now.

Chris Simcox's wife is seeking a divorce and alleges in court documents that he twice brandished a gun and threatened to shoot his family in late 2009 - four years after he helped found the Minuteman movement that drew thousands of anti-illegal immigration activists to patrol the border.

Simcox worked recently as an adviser to J.D. Hayworth, who is challenging Sen. John McCain in Arizona's Republican primary. A Hayworth spokesman says Simcox is no longer affiliated with the campaign.

A judge in Phoenix ordered Simcox to surrender his guns and stay away from his family.

I'd name her Crazy-Eyed Killer.

• Jaimepmac via Flickr

But she's not my baby Boston Terrier, and so her name is Lulu.

UPDATE: Lulu's one paw away from finalizing a book deal! (See Paul's post below.)

As Lindy mentioned in Morning News, GQ has published Rielle Hunter's first public interview, in which she stands by her man and their "force field of love," talks about living a truthful life (when the man you love is lying about you on national television), and how to not emasculate your man (hint: never cross a room to him unless, assumedly, you're vacuuming).

In light of the continuing Andrew Young sex-tape business, and after four years of silence, Hunter's interview finally completes the narrative to this somewhat tired story. She's been labeled a manipulative hussy by Elizabeth Edwards and Young, among others, but in this interview she comes across as earnest to the point of being delusional. It's kind of sad, really. (She's also photographed pantsless on a bed of stuffed animals, which will go a long way towards quelling those hussy accusations.)

A few highlights from the 10-page interview:

When did Johnny start to tell you that there were problems in his marriage?
Well, I was aware of it from the get-go. He doesn't lie to me.

How can you be sure?
He doesn't lie to me. He discloses everything to me. And he has no fear of lying to me. Part of the problem—it's the fear of what's gonna happen that causes the lie. And the hiding. The fear of the repercussions. And, well, first of all, infidelity doesn't happen in healthy marriages. The break in the marriage happens before the infidelity. And that break happened, you know, two and a half decades before I got there. So the home was wrecked already. I was not the Home Wrecker.

So you have enough of a bond with him that, even though you know he's lied to his wife and his state and the country, you really never worry that he will lie to you?
No. He does not lie to me. At all.

... did you think he should be running for president?
Oh, no, I did not think he should run for president.

Because of you?
Because of his entire life. Here's the most interesting thing. He had already been vetted for a vice presidential campaign. And he had a lot of problems going on that nobody knew about. So no, I didn't think he should run. And I said that to him. But I also said that if he felt it in his heart that this is his path and what he needed to do, that he should wait till April. Because I thought he was going to have a very hard January, February, and March. And it turned out he did have a very hard January, February, and March.

Why did you think that?
Um, just based upon intuition. And my small knowledge of astrology. [laughs]