

The Food: Corn Dogs! Roasted corn!
The Art: Urinals, Hair and Space Museum's Northwest Passage, Elvistravaganza.
The Everything Else: Owl sex! Unicorn farts! Harmonicas! A dude who wants you to punch him! Meditation! Teenagers! Kids! Smelly things! Motionless white lady! Free samples! Sheets! Scientology! A guitar shredder! Bus riders! Cute dogs! Hell! Fuck hipster!
Or see everything in one place RIGHT HERE!
Here's a quick update of what's been going on at Bumbershoot over the past two days:

The Dirtbombs did NOT fail to impress at all.
Derek Erdman did 350 jumping jacks so he could enjoy three corndogs.
AM & Shawn Lee delivered a killer space-funk jam.
Katie Kate covered Kate Bush!
The Promise Ring happened and it was fantastic (and there are several videos to prove it).
See EVERYTHING Bumbershoot related—15 minute first impressions! Eighteen Individual Eyes! Hair and Space Museum!—RIGHT HERE!

* Pezzner's beats hit over 130 bpm!
* Sera Cahoone played songs for lovers!
* Dan Savage gave sex advice to owls!
* The Scientologists tried to eliminate your Bumber-stress!
* THEESatisfaction seduced the crowd with their dance moves!
Our Bumbershoot coverage continues—Gotye! Black Breath! The Spittin' Cobras! Don't Talk to the Cops! Ayron Jones & the Way!—right here!
Dave Segal reviews an afternoon metal show, Christopher Frizzelle talks shit about Gotye, Timothy Rysdyke films part of THEESatisfaction's set, and I go on the search for Bumbershoot's cutest dog. Read, watch, and/or see it all right here!
The fourth annual report on Arts and Economic Prosperity—a national breakdown of how institutional arts economics fit in with the rest of the economy—was released this summer. You can check out its findings over here. It has a few nuggets worth noticing. The Seattle arts economy, for example, supports the equivalent of around 11,000 full-time jobs—roughly the same number as Dallas, even though Dallas's population is twice as large.
And as you head to—or avoid—Bumbershoot this weekend, you can think about the jobs it supports and this graph:
Strange that the US has more people working in arts and culture administration than police officers and firefighters put together. And strange that they don't have a more influential lobbying presence.
Posted by Chow intern Hannah Wilson.
Before/during/after a long, hard day of Bumbershooting, you’re hungry and overwhelmed by the options in/around the Seattle Center. Don't panic—try these, and trust us, we know what we’re doing:
Inside, at the Center House (now called the Armory):
· Pie makes pies you can wander around with while your blood sugar level normalizes.
· Eltana has simple and tasty bagels and spreads.
· You can get meat at Skillet or Quincy's.
· Go to MOD if you must have pizza.
· The Confectional makes blasphemy-inspiring cheesecake.
Outside the gates:
· 5 Point Cafe on Cedar is open 24 hours so it’s okay if you don’t know what time it is.
· Citizen on the west east slope of lower Queen Anne has crepes and wine by the people, for the people.
· Finally, relax in the Sitting Room and reward yourself with a cocktail.

Van was also singly responsible for creating Divine's image, writes John. (Divine worked as a hairdresser before he got famous, and "his specialty was exaggerated, ridiculously complicated bouffant hairdos.") Costume highlights include Divine's ferociously pouffed wedding gown in Female Trouble—constructed of see-through lace, it reveals his pubic hair. And during the filming of Multiple Maniacs, Divine took a break to meet John's mother for the first time: "He was dressed in heels, wig, full makeup, and... a one-piece woman's bathing suit covered in blood."
John Waters: This Filthy World: Filthier & Dirtier happens Sat, September 1, at 8:30 pm at the Bagley Wright Theater. See all our Bumbershoot coverage here!

The first thing you'll notice about the campy dance duo Cherdonna and Lou is their incredible heads. Cherdonna's announces itself first, with riotous blasts of blush and lipstick, and the theater of her eyes extending up, Divine-like, past her natural brows to make a glittery show of most of her forehead. Above the eyescape sits the classic Cherdonna Shinatra hairdo: a jet of dark hair-sprayed bangs rubbing up against a huge, swooping blond hairpiece. Compared to Cherdonna, Lou looks possibly sedate, even when wedged in an American-flag bodysuit, his pompadour bubbling upward, a thin line of facial hair lining his upper lip and running along his jaw, natural in all respects until you realize it's made of deep-blue glitter.
Cherdonna and Lou burst onto the Seattle dance scene in 2009, when dancers and friends Jody Kuehner and Ricki Mason came together to make a dance to Olivia Newton-John's "Xanadu" for a Velocity fund-raiser. After the piece's rapturous reception, Kuehner and Mason made things official with a name. "I knew I wanted to be Lou Henry Hoover, after the first lady," says Mason. "I told Jody, 'Pick a name that sounds good with Lou'...."
Read the whole thing here.
Yes, indeed, it's Dan Savage and Lindy West, plus a couple other people, doing a slide show to celebrate Our Great Nation and our book, How to Be a Person: The Stranger's Guide to College, Sex, Intoxicants, Tacos, and Life Itself!
It's tomorrow, that is, Saturday, at 7 p.m. at the Leo K. Theater at Seattle Rep (aka the Words & Ideas stage) at good ol' Bumbershoot.
The slide show/discussion, entitled "The Stranger's Guide to America," is loosely based on chapter 4 of the book, written by Lindy West, which is extremely hilarious. To be discussed: moose wrangling, clogged arteries, Tom Hanks, earthquakes, glue-huffers, Oprah Winfrey's most recent movements, more, more more!
Also, bonus material: We made some mistakes in the book—here are the ones we've found so far. THEY ARE ALL DAN SAVAGE'S FAULT!

Seeing Mudhoney frontman Mark Arm pulling records from shelves in Sub Pop's warehouse is akin to finding Iggy Pop at the Jiffy Lube. Really? Arm—one of the catalysts of gr*ng*—has to work a day job? He can't live off the royalties from "Touch Me I'm Sick"? What kind of world is this?
On record and onstage, Arm sounds like one of the most dissatisfied, cantankerous characters ever to expectorate onto a microphone. But gliding around this warehouse and leaning against this table before a Flatron computer (wait, dude doesn't even have his own chair?!), processing orders from music retailers worldwide, he exudes a calm, comfortable acceptance of his role in the universe. Dressed in a forest-green T-shirt emblazoned with no band logos or any design whatsoever and wearing black jeans and sneakers, Sub Pop's warehouse manager looks at least 15 years younger than his actual 50. He has all of his hair, which still hangs lankly, longly, and blondly from his noggin.
If you get near Arm, you'll notice he has the most intense eyes; you feel like if you touched his brow, the radiation from his disdain could incinerate you. But he also possesses one of the broadest smiles I've ever seen and frequently laughs like a champ.
Arm is a guitar-thrashing, larynx-shredding icon of Seattle music, so people probably have grandiose ideas about what his life is like. Maybe this article is a demystification.
Mudhoney play Bumbershoot, Sun. Sept. 2, 6 pm-7 pm, Fountain Lawn Stage.

Well, except sunscreen, earplugs, plenty of fluid, and some Xanax. BUT! Everything ELSE you need—schedules, maps, words about EVERY GODDAMN THING HAPPENING AT BUMBERSHOOT—is at thestranger.com/bumbershoot.
Want to know which comedy events we recommend? We tell you! Want to know how Skrillex's hair feels about Chloë Sevigny? We have answers! Want to know why that Gotye song is so catchy? An expert weighs in! Do you need to find the ATMs at Seattle Center? They're on the map! Are you wondering what time the Promise Ring goes on? We have printable daily schedules! Have you always wanted to dress up the Vaselines in cute little outfits? Your dreams have come true! Still haven't bought your tickets? DO THAT.
See all that and so much more RIGHT HERE. Say goodbye to your productivity. It's time to get ready for Bumbershoot.
If you'll recall, Flatstock was almost cut from this year's Bumbershoot programming due to lack of space. But looks like they made it work after all! Hello Flatstock, goodbye all my money.
The festival also announced the 2012 comedy line-up and IT IS GREAT. Janeane Garofalo! Doug Benson! Paul F. Tompkins! Too Beautiful to Live! Brian Posehn! AND MORE!
Lots of yin and yang up in this piece.
Right over here.
You can do this right here, and print out your biz.
It is disappointing, and small (recall the old joke about the man who complains the food is bad at a restaurant, then adds, "And such small portions!"—but I felt it my duty to warn you anyway). A crammed tent, a scattered pavilion, and a handful of underwhelming constructions in the skate park.

Tons of coverage of day one OVER HERE.
COMEDY BANG BANG PODCAST WITH SCOTT AUKERMAN AND PAUL F. TOMPKINS
(Sat—Mon, 6 pm, Bagley Wright) Paul F. Tompkins is my favorite comedian. Full stop. This show is mandatory. LW
HARI KONDABOLU, KYLE KINANE, ANTHONY JESELNIK(Sat, 2:45 pm; Sun, 4:30 pm; Mon, 6:15; Intiman) This is a fucking GREAT lineup. It would be stupid to go to only one thing at Bumbershoot this year, but if you DO go to only one thing because you're a human freak of some kind, this is probably the one thing you should go to. LA-based Kyle Kinane is one of the smartest fuckups on the planet. He's also one of my favorite comics existing right now (and yours, too, even if you don't know yet, snail-face). He has a beard. Hari Kondabolu is a treasure, which I have explained in this paper approximately infinity-plus-one times. Anthony Jeselnik is a charming prick. LW
This is the first time Seattle Symphony has ever played Bumbershoot. (Tickets.)
And this isn't the Seattle Symphony of the last 26 years—this is the Seattle Symphony of the future. It's led not by longtime music director Gerry Schwarz but rather by a 37-year-old Frenchman named Ludovic Morlot, who in certain pictures bears a resemblance to James Spader.
Morlot will take the stage at 9:45 pm Sunday as his first public concert since he accepted the job. But in addition to conducting, he'll sit down and play his violin. The program is music by Philip Glass, Anthony DiLorenzo, Vivaldi (the Double Violin Concerto, on which Morlot will play), Seth Krimsky (a new piece for electric bassoon), and Tom Johnson's lovable Failing: A Very Difficult Piece for Solo String Bass, to be performed by Joseph Kaufman.
Thank you in advance for not boring the hell out of those of us who love the art of music, regardless of what it's called, who plays it, what they wear, or the venue.
Stranger art director Aaron Huffman is one of these artists, and I love what he's done with his found scene of horses in a pasture. In this recession, perhaps you would rather be a horse?
Bumber by Number is open all weekend. Get tickets ahead of time to avoid the lines.
I lost a kidney to bring this guide to you. TRUE STORY.
In the guide:
Five Great Things About Daryl Hall & John Oates!
Butthole Surfer and the Ultimate Brown Sound!
Is It Still Possible to Love Battlestar Galactica, Knowing That the Ending Sucks Donkey Dick?!
Charles Mudede Is in Love With Yukimi Nagano of Little Dragon!
Astronautalis on Relentless Dirtbag Touring, German Squats, and F. Scott Fitzgerald!
Dennis Coffey Has Made a Life by Staying Out of the Limelight!
John Dwyer Keeps Thee Oh Sees Pointed Toward the Good Life!
Eighteen Months of Accomplishments, Van Breakdowns, and Weddings with the Lonely Forest!
Daughter of a Gun: Marya Sea Kaminski's Bonnie Parker Play
Plus, some words about every damn thing happening at Bumbershoot!
GET YR TICKETS RIGHT HERE BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO WAIT IN LINE LIKE A SUCKER.

I'm told there's live music and stuff at Bumbershoot, but the biggest attraction will surely be the Toyota Prius Playground, where you'll get a chance to generate electricity to power the festival by operating stationary bicycles and a gigantic hamster wheel.

You can watch how much power you're generating by following a real time display of energy production and consumption within the playground, and best of all, after three minutes of pedaling/hamstering, you'll be rewarded with a free snow cone made by the power you generated. Cool. Literally.
The Prius Playground, a partnership with the not-for-profit Global Inheritance, is intended to inspire youth to think creatively about energy solutions, but all you really need to know is giant hamster wheel and free snow cones! So what's not to like?
Well lookie here, lookie-loos! The full list is after the jump!
After a brief glance, here are the people I will be most likely to stand in line to see:
Jeselnik
Kinane
Tompkins
Mirman
Also, nice of them to throw ONE fucking female comic in there. Thanks, guys. That means a lot to my vagina.