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I'm a regular reader of your column and appreciated your advice to POPS, the dad of the butt-curious young man, who you told to buy his son a butt plug. But I wondered if you and your readers knew that plugs grow on trees out here in Pennsylvania? Only one crop per year, unfortunately.

Yours,

Plugs Abloom

And what a beautiful crop it is, PA—thanks for sharing.

After the jump: readers respond to Jonathan, the man who wrote to say that he wanted to ram a steel post up my ass after reading my advice for POPS. Also after the jump: the very surprising letter I received from Jonathan after his original letter ran as the SLLOTD.

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Just finished reading the letter from Jonathan. I'd like to thank him for his concern about veterans' feelings. I have spent over a decade in the military, deployed to combat zones, and was retired honorably due to service-connected injury. Now, I can't claim to speak for all soldiers but let me say this: I served for the American right to do whatever the hell we want, up to and including sticking things in our butts. Butt-thing-sticking is our right as humans and Americans. Lots of us soldiers stick things in our butts, too. POPS' son can go forth and enjoy himself with at least one combat veteran's blessing. And for fuck's sake, Jonathan, stop using my dead friends to support your bigotry. That I do mind.

Sick of Being Propaganda

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If I had a chance to respond to Jonathan and his notion of "courage, honesty, and dignity," I would say this to him:

"A person's sexual practices do not define the kind of person they are—with the obvious caveats. A teen-aged boy can explore his sexuality and the things he likes or dislikes without it being representative of his character. I fail to see where one has to do with the other. A person with dignity shows compassion and empathy towards others. And kindness. A person with dignity seeks to understand rather than blindly pass judgment. A person who engages positively toward "his fellow man" wouldn't kick his son out of the house because of masturbation. Nor would that person threaten—even in jest—to physically harm a complete stranger."

Thanks, Dan. I just had to vent.

Brandy

P.S. I just wanted you to know how much I loved when your Mom hosted your columns. She was hilarious! She must have been a very special lady. I lost my Mom in 2011.

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I am a long-time reader (and listener). I read SLLOTD on October 31, and saw the ridiculous letter from "Jonathan." I just wanted to drop you a quick note to let you know that I am a Louisville-resident, a reader of the LEO, and take my family to Shiraz for dinner. And I love your column, and I agreed with the advice you gave in your column that sparked Jonathan's disagreement. I also wanted to let you know that the majority of the LEO's readership is more on your side than his, even if Kentucky remains a conservative state.

Over the years, your advice has helped enhance the sex and positive energy in my straight marriage, and considering that we were both raised Catholic (and she still is), that was a meaningful contribution to our lives and to our happiness. We also have two prepubescent sons, and your advice has helped us prepare to address sex with them in a healthy way, regardless of their orientations.

This is all stuff you've heard before, and I don't know if it makes much of a difference to you. But for some reason, seeing that letter come from someone reading your column a stone's throw from my house made the criticism more personal and objectionable to me. I hope knowing that there is at least one neighbor of Jonathan who completely disagrees with them would give you a small boost for the day.

Good luck, and continue your good works.

Jonathan's Neighborly Neighbor

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Dan,

I have learned much by reading everyone's comments. I can see now that my biting and sarcastic words with you in our email interaction has only made me appear intolerant and homophobic. Actually, neither is true, not even in the least. But regardless, this reminds me of the importance of speaking with love and grace to others, in both attitude and heart. I cannot change the world. The world will not conform to my perspective. And, contrary to what your bloggers assume, I am glad for this. I prefer a diverse world.

I can guarantee you that my relationship with my kids is not only fantastic, but healthy, joyful, and realistic. Should my son have the aforementioned issue, I would certainly not interact with him as roughly as I did with you. But then again, I took this tone with you because I thought your advice was absurd. After all, it is not me who has a column in a prominent local magazine. It is your well-publicized opinion that is read, not mine. But as far as my son, he would know exactly what is appropriate and acceptable, and what is not. But I can assure you, this has probably never crossed his mind. Really. We've raised our kids in an honorable, orderly way, with appropriate and sensible freedoms, and they have responded well.

Also, I thank you and your readers for reminding me of the importance of respecting others, and for the value of diversity in viewpoints. Also, please note that I never said anything about masturbation. That, I think, is a normal and important part of everyone's development. But don't you think there should be a line, and that it should be drawn somewhere? If so, then I suppose we are just arguing over where that line should be. And that line, my friend, is not only important, but essential for a well-ordered community and state.

By the way, no I do not watch Fox News, or CNN. Blockbuster "newstainment" stations are hardly worth their salt. And I vote independently, for whom I think is the best candidate, moving between the parties... hoping for a third. (Just mentioning this lest your readers fall into the similar error of judging others!:)

Keep up the thoughtful work, Dan. I have learned much from this. Thank you.

Jonathan