Move over Bruce Jenner, Jocelyn Wildenstein, and LaToya Jackson's nose—there's a new kid in town, Toby Sheldon, who [thinks he] looks just like Justin Bieber. If you can actually make it through this song, note the "JOIN US!" at the very end. Even if I had $100,000 to waste, I think I better keep my original face, thankyouverymuch.

"The Plastics" stars Sheldon as Plastic Bieber, 30-year-old Kitty Jay as Plastic Jennifer Lawrence, and Venus D'Lite (of RuPaul's Drag Race fame) as Plastic Madonna.