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Monday, April 14, 2014

Florida Bill Prepares for Zombie Apocalypse by Lifting Gun Permit Requirements in Emergencies

Posted by on Mon, Apr 14, 2014 at 11:07 AM

Why don't they just go all the way and call this the Walking Dead Bill?

In a crisis situation or evacuation for natural disasters such as hurricanes and wildfires, people with no criminal record would be allowed to carry a firearm without a permit, under a bill approved Friday by the Florida House of Representatives.

"The bells of liberty are surely ringing throughout Florida today," said Representative Heather Dawes Fitzenhagen, a Fort Myers Republican who sponsored the bill lifting permit requirements for concealed weapons in an emergency declared by the governor or local authorities.

That's just what a Hurricane Katrina-like situation needs: A bunch of gun nuts declaring their own personal martial law and standing their ground all over the fucking place. The bill now goes to the state Senate and may wind up on the governor's desk by the end of this month, Reuters's Bill Cotterell says.

 

Comments (26) RSS

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Phoebe in Wallingford 1
Well, I should hope at least all of Florida's county sheriffs are pressuring Rick Scott to veto the bill should it get to his desk.
Posted by Phoebe in Wallingford on April 14, 2014 at 11:12 AM · Report this
JonnoN 2
In NO they would've been standing their ground against the police.
Posted by JonnoN http://www.backnine.org/ on April 14, 2014 at 11:13 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 3
Personally, I like "Gun Nut Fantasy Bill."

Since gun nuts (notice I said "gun nut" not "gun owner") all deep down want an excuse to use their weapon to kill another person. Why do you think George Zimmerman is such a hero to them? He achieved what they all want.

So a disaster situation where they had more or less free reign to shoot people would be quite a fantasy for them.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on April 14, 2014 at 11:14 AM · Report this
4
You're pretty naive if you think that during a natural disaster or civil unrest when there is no law enforcement, that 'gun nuts' aren't going to be carrying weapons anyway.
Posted by CPN on April 14, 2014 at 11:15 AM · Report this
5
@3

Yeah, Hurricane Katrina was definitely a gun nut's fantasy.
Posted by CPN on April 14, 2014 at 11:16 AM · Report this
6
The thing is, local/state governments MUST declare a "state of emergency" to be eligible for federal assistance. So it often is declared in situations well-short of Katrina-level destruction. Did you know that King County is under an active "state of emergency" declaration *right now*?

http://www.governor.wa.gov/office/procla…
Posted by wxPDX on April 14, 2014 at 11:20 AM · Report this
Theodore Gorath 7
@5: You joke, but...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danziger_Br…

Overstressed morons with itchy trigger fingers shoot unarmed civilians, one in the back. And these guys were trained by the state and licensed to carry.

So we should definitely encourage more untrained people to carry more guns in emergency scenarios.
Posted by Theodore Gorath on April 14, 2014 at 11:22 AM · Report this
8
Christ.

This like "Serbia pre-Bosnian war" type shit right here.

These are the laws you pass when you want your band of deputized extremist thugs (in Serbia it was soccer hooligans they armed and turned into militias) it to instigate purges and regional civil wars.
Posted by tkc on April 14, 2014 at 11:26 AM · Report this
Urgutha Forka 9
Is it wrong to feel ok about Floridians shooting each other?

Should I not feel that?
Posted by Urgutha Forka on April 14, 2014 at 12:00 PM · Report this
Doctor Memory 10
Christ. Why not just call it the "in case of emergency shoot the nearest black dude" bill?
Posted by Doctor Memory http://blahg.blank.org on April 14, 2014 at 12:03 PM · Report this
11
Add one more to the long list of reasons to NEVER go to Florida.
Posted by NeitherThisNorThat on April 14, 2014 at 12:06 PM · Report this
Max Solomon 12
gun nut one-upmanship. it's like there are no other problems. watch it spread like wildfire across the Gun Belt.

the sea level can't rise fast enough for me. less florida is good for all of america.
Posted by Max Solomon on April 14, 2014 at 12:14 PM · Report this
13
@12, that'll push 'em inland. It's not the dirt in Florida that's the problem, it's the goofballs inhabiting that dirt.
Posted by California on April 14, 2014 at 12:17 PM · Report this
14
Let's call it what it really is a license to kill "those people" for cowardly, old white racist murderers.

Since Florida cannot afford to imprison all young men of color in the same way they have done in last, several decades AND subsidize the lifestyles of their expanding welfare class of retiring baby boomers at the same time, they're giving the crazy, old racists the power of summary judgment. Make no mistake these laws are meant to protect murderers of young people of color. It is a declaration of "open season" and war on the young men of color by the old, white men.

The old, white SOBs are scared shitless with the fear that their lifetime of exploiting, stealing and discriminating against (and falsely or unfairly imprisoning) young people of color is about to be revisited in a wave of justice on their sorry, old ass and their hoarded "stuff." Gawd, they think everyone wants to get at them and their goddamn stuff.

When you combine the crazy, old white people with their children's religious "end-of times" religious insanity, you really have one fucked group of insane white trash.

If you're a young person of color, especially a young man, you really have two strategies:

1. Leave Florida and never look back.

2. Join the police force in mass, and for your and your family's life and future get active in politics and government, run for office, elect people who truly reflect your reality and stop voting for old, white people who see you and your family as "those people." Force your way into every political and government office until you fill every branch and rank of government. It worked for the Irish; it can work for you.
Posted by Florida - Hanging off the ass of America on April 14, 2014 at 12:22 PM · Report this
15
If it's a natural disaster, why not open carry?
Posted by unpaid reader on April 14, 2014 at 12:30 PM · Report this
MacCrocodile 16
@9 - Until there's a bulletproof border wall on the Mason-Dixon Line, I'm a little nervous.
Posted by MacCrocodile http://maccrocodile.com/ on April 14, 2014 at 12:38 PM · Report this
17
@7
Since those shootings were by police does that mean you were referring to police as "gun nuts"?

"Overstressed morons with itchy trigger fingers shoot unarmed civilians, one in the back."

It certainly looks like you're referring to the police as "gun nuts".
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 14, 2014 at 12:42 PM · Report this
18
If you travel to Florida, stop.
Posted by wasd on April 14, 2014 at 12:45 PM · Report this
19
When the old, Southern baby boomers leave the planet and their self-serving culture of consumer capitalist exploitation, delusional history based in shared televised reality and their insane belief in wars without costs finally fades away America may at long, long last get a little peace and quiet...and sanity.

Posted by America's Insane War With Itself on April 14, 2014 at 1:15 PM · Report this
JonnoN 20
@17 you seem to have trouble with reading. Regardless, were you trying to make some kind of point?
Posted by JonnoN http://www.backnine.org/ on April 14, 2014 at 1:21 PM · Report this
venomlash 21
@17: He never said "gun nuts". You said "gun nuts". Are you a "gun nut"? Commit sudoku.
Posted by venomlash on April 14, 2014 at 3:53 PM · Report this
22
@21
My internet stalker who makes thinly veiled suggestions that I kill myself, yes he did.

http://www.thestranger.com/slog/archives…
"Since gun nuts (notice I said "gun nut" not "gun owner") all deep down want an excuse to use their weapon to kill another person."

So you are a liar.
But then you believe that stalking someone is a rational response when disagreeing with them.
http://www.thestranger.com/slog/archives…
"I promise to stop stalking you if you leave The SLOG and never return."

I have an internet stalker.
And my internet stalker likes to make thinly veiled suggestions that I kill myself.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 14, 2014 at 5:38 PM · Report this
Knat 23
@17: You just went full retard.

You of all people mocking someone else's reading comprehension is pretty fucking hilarious.
Posted by Knat on April 14, 2014 at 9:38 PM · Report this
Sandiai 24
Venomlash, omg! HaHahahahahahaaaa! I'm weeping with laughter.

FU, here's my thinly veiled suggestion to commit 囲碁.
Posted by Sandiai on April 14, 2014 at 11:11 PM · Report this
venomlash 25
@22: He never said "gun nuts". At least, not anywhere NEAR where he said anything about police. By your logic:
Your post #17 contained the word "moron". Your post #22 contained the word "I". Are you saying that you are a moron? Because if so, you're 100% correct and deserve a gold star, to be shoved up your ass so you can have a clear look at it.
Posted by venomlash on April 15, 2014 at 11:32 AM · Report this
26
@25
"He never said "gun nuts"."

My internet stalker who makes thinly veiled suggestions that I kill myself, yes he did.

"Since gun nuts (notice I said "gun nut" not "gun owner") all deep down want an excuse to use their weapon to kill another person."

So you are a liar.
But then you believe that stalking someone is a rational response when disagreeing with them.
http://www.thestranger.com/slog/archives…
"I promise to stop stalking you if you leave The SLOG and never return."

I have an internet stalker.
And my internet stalker likes to make thinly veiled suggestions that I kill myself.
Posted by fairly.unbalanced on April 15, 2014 at 12:38 PM · Report this

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